She - Devil?



She devil, thy name is Britney -- Tuesday, July 2, 2002
By Dianne Williamson Telegram & Gazette Columnist

As Britney Spears strutted across the Worcester Centrum Centre stage Sunday night, bare belly gyrating and blond hair whipping around her head like a weapon, I couldn't shake the surrealism of what I was witnessing.

On that Worcester stage pranced the No. 1 celebrity in the world. Twenty-year-old Britney Spears. She of the melodically challenged, marketing-manufactured, lip-synching pop rock that contains the raw musical depth to appeal to 6-year-old girls.

It's not that I don't like Britney. I just think, deep down, she's probably the devil.
Her image as a sweet, innocent virgin trapped in the body of a slut, coupled with the perception that she's a modern, independent woman who does her own thing, has resulted in mass confusion among parents of young girls who aren't quite sure whether Britney is helpful or harmless to their daughters' psyche and self-image. And those mixed messages are precisely what has positioned young Britney to take over the world.

Think about it. With her perfect physique and plastic voice processed by digital pitch-shifters, it's hard to say definitively if the girl is even a human being. I mean, has anyone actually seen her eat?

I didn't think so.

But we have seen her lower the standards of music in this country and, indeed, around the world. Isn't that the job of the devil? To subtly seduce, to destroy the value of what we hold dear, to chip away at our very senses?

It must be working, because Forbes magazine recently named Britney Spears the No. 1 celebrity in the world, ahead of Julia Roberts, Tiger Woods and Steven Spielberg.

Here's the thing. I went to the concert prepared to endure an evening of excruciating music and vacuous entertainment. As I sat and watched, though, I found myself admiring the energy expended by this attractive young girl, who's easy if not compelling to watch on stage. What's worse -- on the way home, I actually caught myself humming the tune to one of her stupid songs, virtually against my will.

Devil, thy name is Britney!

John LaHair, the Centrum marketing director who happened to call yesterday after I formulated my Britney-as-anti-Christ theory, began our conversation by waxing poetic about all the sweet young girls who were transfixed by the sight of their idol, the teen pop cyborg.

"When you see a lot of the kids at their first concert, these are memories being made," he said. "You never forget your first concert. It was just a great evening."

Maybe.

"But don't you think a good chance exists that Britney Spears is actually the devil?" I asked.

Long pause.

"I think that's a little strong," Mr. LaHair replied. "I find it hard to believe that if you asked people to name their vision of the anti- Christ, the first person they'd choose would be Britney Spears. At least I hope she's not the devil, because she has a pretty decent following."

Exactly!

Britney has a huge following. Young girls who dress like her, dream of her, fantasize about being her. Girls who would no doubt sell their souls if Britney shook her tail -- I mean butt -- in their direction.

Fifteen-year-old Shelley Mercado was attending the concert with her friends. They were decked out in full Britney regalia -- half shirts, bare bellies, tight hip-hugger jeans.

"I just love Britney," Shelley said. "I think she has a lot of confidence in herself, and that's what girls need. Plus, I hope to be a singer one day. I've been trying to get a record deal for four years."

No offense to Shelley, but this is exactly the evil that Britney has spawned. Walking among us are countless young girls who fully believe it's possible to sign a deal with a major record label at age 12, despite the fact that they think "scales" are those icky things on a fish.

The 10-year-old girl sitting next to me couldn't wait to reveal that her first name is Brittany, although, tragically, the spelling is different. She said she adores the other Britney because "she accomplished her dreams" and is really, really pretty.

I asked her if she considered Britney a bit, er ... slutty. "Yes," she said. Does it matter? "No," she replied firmly. "Nothing she does matters."

That view was apparently shared by the majority of concertgoers Sunday night, most of them impressionable young girls mesmerized by the special effects flames of fire that shot up around the she devil on stage, and on the large screens that flashed scenes from her movie, which consisted mostly of Britney giggling in a car, giggling on the beach, giggling in a hotel room, and giggling in the arms of a totally dreamy guy.

Laurie Carlson of Auburn brought her 7-year-old daughter, Melanie, to the show and later shelled out $15 for a Britney doll that Melanie clutched like grim death as she exited the Centrum.

"The girl puts on a heck of a show," Ms. Carlson said.

But doesn't Britney's hold on her daughter trouble her at all? Isn't it a bit creepy? Isn't she, quite frankly, terrified that her offspring will morph into a giggling, soulless, butt-shaking, belly- baring, Britney wannabe?

Ms. Carlson shrugged. "I think Britney is harmless," she replied.

For the sake of her daughter's soul, I pray that she's right.


:: in deFense ::