If I Told You That...

By Angel
Feedback: babyblue855@yahoo.com
Pairing: Just read!
Rated: NC-17.
Disclaimer: Don’t know them... well personally anyway... so back off!

So here I sit across from him. He’s reading some magazine with him in the cover and it reads on the outside “Brian...naughty or nice? You decide.”

I can’t help but chuckle at that. Everyone looks at him like such an innocent boy. Why is it so hard for them to accept that he is a man? Sure, he has an angelic voice, the face of innocence, and the charming personality of an overgrown child but he is very much a man. A married man.

I’m wondering why he hasn’t noticed me staring at him yet. I’ve been staring for almost half an hour and he hasn‘t noticed. Not that I want to be noticed but usually you can tell when someone is staring at you. Oh well, works out better for me... I can keep doing it.

His cell phone rings and he answers. Immediately a smile shows itself on his face and I know who is on the other end. It’s her... his wife. You know who she is so please don’t make me say her name. It infuriates me to mention that name. God forgive me but I hate that woman. Selfish as it may seem, he should be with me and not her!

He’s talking to her and laughing at something she said. That’s ridiculous. She isn’t funny! She doesn’t have a funny bone in her body. Her sense of humor is as dated as the dinosaur fossils. Basically because she is as old as the fossils! Well maybe I’m exaggerating a little but she is 6 years older than him!

She should be charged as a pedophile! Okay... maybe not because well... if he and I were together... he’d be older than me and I wouldn’t charge him as a pedophile but that would be different! Somehow it would be!

Wow! A miracle has just occurred. He actually hung up! No way! They usually talk for hours. Oh well... guess not today huh?

Anyway, he’s back to the magazine and I am back to staring. All’s back on track.

Just for a moment I let my mind wonder... how would he react if I told him I have loved him for quite a while now?

Of course, this is a purely hypothetical situation because I would never ruin our friendship by doing that. Never. He means too much to me and I’d rather have him as only a friend than as nothing at all. But still, I wonder... if I told him that I loved him... how would he react?

The thought of telling him has crossed my mind but every time it does, I push it away. Now I feel like playing with the idea. How would he react?

Maybe he’d be disgusted and throw a fit over how wrong my thoughts are... and how he’s married blah blah blah. That would be the most likely response but I can’t help but fantasize for a different response. A response where his features would soften, he’d smile and declare the same for me but I know... never going to happen.

I look away from him and out of the window. The sun isn’t shining. As a matter of fact, it looks like it going to rain. The day has decided to display what my heart feels. That’s not good. I don’t need that right now.

Uh oh. I feel a hand tap my shoulder.

“Yeah?” I turned to see his heavenly blue eyes stare back at me.

“What’s wrong? I mean you’re crying... why?” He said as he brushed away one of my tears with his thumb.

Wow! He is genuinely concerned about me. He’s so wonderful. Oh my god! He’s right! I didn’t even notice it but I am crying! Tears are falling from my eyes and I can’t stop.

“I’m okay Brian.” I manage to say, trying to keep my voice steady.

“Don’t lie to me. What’s wrong?” He insists on knowing what is wrong with me. Uh oh... not good.

“Just stuff that I have to deal with on my own but thanks for worrying though. It means a lot to me.”

“I won’t push the issue now because it’s obvious we aren’t going to get anywhere with it but you will tell me.” He said firmly. He’s serious about this. Why does he care so much?

“Okay.” I said to get him off my back.

I see him sit back down on the couch and go back to the article in that stupid magazine. Must be interesting what they wrote about him. He always has a good laugh about that.

Okay, I can’t take this anymore. Remember that hypothetical situation I told you about earlier? Well it’s about to become real. Right now!

“Brian,” I speak up breaking the silence and he looks up at me. “There’s something I have to tell you.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What is it? You sound serious.” He said.

Oh Lordy. Here it goes. It’s now or never. Oh gosh... wait a minute... do I really want to do this? I mean I could lose him for good. Will I be able to handle that? Only one way to find out.

“It is serious.” I start talking and my voice failed me. It actually cracked! That hasn’t happened since I was thirteen!

“What’s it about?” He asked taking the space next to me.

God why does he have to sit so close to me?

“It’s about us.” I simply answer. I figure if I take this piece by piece and only answer his questions, it will be easier.

“Us? Is this about last week? You know, when we got into that fight and I called you a fag? I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean that. I was just angry...we both were and... things were said that should have never been said because neither of us meant it.”

That’s right! I didn’t remember but he did call me a fag. This isn’t making it any easier.

“It’s not that Brian.” I speak very softly. Barely audible.

“Then what is it?” He asked wiping away my tears yet again.

“I love you...” I said. There... it has been said. I did it.

“I love you too. But why are you crying?”

He didn’t get it. He thinks I mean as a friend. Oh Lord. Give me the courage to do this one more time. Please give me the strength to say those words one more time.

“I’m crying because you don’t love me.” I said.

“What are you talking about?” He laughed. “Of course I love you. I just told you.”

“No Brian... you don’t understand.”

“Then make me understand.”

“I love you so much... more than I love anything in life...” I said and he interrupted.

“That’s very sweet of you.”

“Let me finish, please or else I won‘t have the courage to do it at all.” I sighed then continued. “I love you but not as a friend nor as a brother. I love you in the romantic sense. I love you like you love your... wife.” Uttering that last word hurt. Very badly.

“Oh.” He said. His eyes never left mine but the deep blue eyes that once could read so clearly, now seemed unreadable.

“I have loved you for years now. Since I was fifteen years old. You are my first and only love.” I was feeling brave. If I’m going to do this, I might as well go all the way.

“Brian?” I called his name as to bring him back to earth. Tears began to fall from his eyes and it broke my heart.

“Say some thing Brian... please... say anything.”

“Okay... I heard you out but now you going to have to listen to me... and listen good...” He said wiping his tears with the back of his hand.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Okay... I’m listening.” I said, visibly trembling of either fear or arousal. Maybe even both. He was so close... I could almost feel his skin on mine.

“Actually, I’d rather just do this.” He said and leaned in for a kiss.

Hold the press! What the hell is going on?!?!?! I am dreaming, that’s what it is.

No wait, I’m not dreaming... that’s definitely his tongue trying to choke me. Do something you idiot! Brian is kissing you! RESPOND!

Without allowing me to reply once again he pounced on my lips with a passion and lust unlike before. The kiss was no longer sweet. It was full of desire and wanting. He then, without further warning and without breaking the kiss, picked me up and brought me to his bed. He lay me down ever so gently and landed on top of me only to continue the kissing.

We undressed quickly and returned to our physical exploration.

When our bodies came in contact, the situation intensified. Brian gasped as he felt my bare skin touch his and I moaned as Brian's hand bumped against my private parts. (AN: I feel like such a nerd calling it that)

I let my lips wander down to the skin of Brian's neck. I then gently kissed Brian's chest. I moved a hand down Brian's stomach. I stopped only momentarily before running one finger up and down Brian's gorgeous, big, long, thick cock. I heard Brian draw in a breath as my hand pleased him.

"God baby that feels so good." Brian gasped.

I slid down the bed so that my head was at the same place my hand was. I slowly and carefully let my tongue flicker out and touch the head of Brian’s perfect cock. Brian was melting with pleasure. I was enjoying the taste of precum on my tongue. I flicked my tongue out again and again as to torture my Bri with constant motion that was barely there.

"Oh, baby please don't fucking tease me like that, Oooh god this feels so awesome." Brian moaned.

I took a deep breath before allowing all of my Bri to enter my mouth. I felt Brian's hand on my head guiding his huge cock inside. I took Brian in as best I could without gagging. My hand continued to stroke.

"Oh fucking shit, baby if you don't stop I’m fucking going to..." Brian moaned, pulling at my hair. I didn't answer him and I didn't stop either. I prepared myself as best I could, but it was still a surprise when Brian held my head in place, pushing his cock deep into my hungry mouth as far as he could.

"Holy FUCK!" Brian screamed, gasping for breath as he slowly released my hair.

I took all that he had to offer and drank it up.

He pushed me back gently so that I was under him, and he ended up on his hands and knees over me.

I put my hands up and stroked his hair as I looked deep in his eyes.

He stroked my hair and I buried my face to him. He kissed the side of my face.

"Are you nervous Bri?"

He swallowed. "Yeah. I just don't want to hurt you baby. Do you still want to do this?" He asked...

I nodded.

He looked into my eyes, and his blue eyes looked so...I don't know. There's no word for the deep emotion that it stirred up inside me, starting at my head and traveling down to the tip of my toes.

I kissed him again and again. I began to toy with his member yet again... I wanted more... I laid my hand on the area and he moaned. I wriggled my fingers around and found his penis and squeezed gently and rubbed it. He moaned again and then kissed me.

I sat Brian up, then I laid him down and kissed him on his ankles. His long, slim muscular legs were enchanting me, and he sighed softly. I kissed his legs everywhere. I kissed his toes, his knees, and his thighs. I kissed the inside of his legs and everywhere around. My hands kept massaging all over his perfectly toned legs as my mouth tasted every inch of them. I gently massaged, higher up, and laid my face on his private area.

He stroked my hair and smiled contentedly. We lay like that for a long, long while. It was at least 20 minutes. He was so soft there. I softly and ever so gently stroked his beautiful legs. I loved him so deeply.

I could feel his lips on mine, and he was cuddling with me and kissing me. I kissed his mouth back passionately. He made a moan of surprise, but tenderly kissed me back.

He got on top of me, facing down, and lowered himself. He spread my legs and rubbed up against me. I groaned in pleasure and wrapped my legs around the back of his gorgeous legs.

He kissed my neck. He felt really hard to me, so I got out from under him. I got down, and took his ridged manhood in my mouth, and sucked hard, better than before. Enjoying every inch.

“Damn babe... again?” He asked smiling.

His leg muscles tensed. As I sucked him with every bit of desire I had, my attention hadn’t left his legs. I kept stroking his legs up and down. By this time he realized I loved his legs. I sucked at him more, and I could hear him groan and moan like he was about to pass out. It was obvious I had a knack for doing this to him right. His cum came rushing inside me, and I felt his hands in my hair. I sucked at him more and he moaned. I drank from him completely.

He let go of me after a little while. He lay me down on my back, and spread my legs, moving closer.

"Do you want me to?" He asked quietly.

"Yes." I said with anticipation and anxiety. "Oh God yes."

He teased me, rubbing against my virgin hole but not quite entering.

I moaned and said, "Please Bri, please!"

He spread my cheeks, and set himself in me. I squeezed my muscles around him.

He leaned forward, putting my legs around his beautiful stomach. I whimpered. He was torturing me by not doing it. He wrapped his arms around me, and he kissed me. He thrust his hips forward, ramming up into me hard, further and further entering me until I cried with pain and pleasure. He rocked me back and forth hard and satisfying.

Brian and I were actually having sex now. He held me to him and rocked me hard and blissfully pleasuring. I cried in pain and pleasure.

"I love you...I love you..." I moaned.

"I love you too." He whispered, kissing me.

"I love you." I said again as he made love to me.

"Shh." He said as he kissed my lips and fucked me harder and harder.

"Does it hurt a lot baby?" He asked. I just nodded.

"I'm sorry." He said.

"It hurts..." I said. "But it also feels very good. Don't worry ...about me, sex always hurts the... first time, it's ok baby."

"Okay." He kissed me and fucked me even harder still up until he came deep inside of me. He began to slowly retract himself making me feel like I was empty. Like something that my body needed was suddenly missing... while kissing me and telling me how much he loved me.

I should never assume anything! I am so bad at predicting people’s reactions... but I’m glad I was wrong.

The End