Disclaimer: The characters in this story aren't mine. I do not own parts in DB/Z/GT.
Author's note: Some reference are made in this story to I'll always be there, one of my precedent story. If you're wondering what the characters are talking about, go read it.
He was there, laying next to her, asleep. Once again, she hadn't been able to do it. She was too afraid to go on and finaly do it. But what was she so afraid of ? At least he understood. He was way older than her, he had done it before, but she knew he
understood she was still young, pure and afraid. The proof was that even after many months, he still loved her without conditions, without questions.
She stood up, sighed with a last sight at him. She pulled the coverts to his chin, kissed him on the cheek, then stood up.
She oppened the door and slowly walked downstairs. Her bestfriend was asleep in front of the TV. She closed the TV, and stood their for a moment silently. Suddenly, she heard foot steps coming down.
-Pan-chan, said a sleepy voice from the stairs.
-Over here Trunks, she whispered back.
Pan listened to the sound of his footsteps, lost in her thought. Trunks came by her and took her hand.
- Hey...You're going?, he said, pulling her close to him.
-Yeah, it's late and...
-Sure, but you should have wake me up. I woke up and didn't found you next to me. I was wondering where you were gone.
He caressed her face softly with his hand. She turned her face away, nervous.
-What?
-Nothing, but we are going to wake up Bra.
He searched in her eyes, unsure.
Why, why am I so unsure
Is that love knocking on my door
Or the sound of my beating heart
If you could only read my mind
You know I just can't hide
What I feel inside
-Want me to drive you home?
-Yeah, I'm so tired I don't think I'll make it home by flying.
-Or you could just sleep over here in a guest room.
She pressed her lips togheter, thinking, uncertain of what to do.
-Good idea...You won't have to drive me home. You're still sleepy.
He smiled to her and softly pulled her by the hand to the guest room. It was just next to his, at the end of the hallway. He oppened the door for her and they both went in.
-You sure you're ok, you look kinda tense.
-Yeah, don't bother, I'm just tired.
She kissed him good night, but soon they started to kiss passionaly. The next thing she knew, they were on the bed, kissing, caressing each other, just like an hour ago, and once again, the same fear came hunting her. But what was she so afraid of? She wanted to have sex with him, she loved him deeply and knew she probably always would. But did he?
Could this be love
How, tell me how will I know<
Will my heart make believe it's so
Or can I trust the way I feel
If you could only read my mind
You see how hard I've tried
Still I can't decide
Trunks was all she ever dreamed about. As a child, he was her hero, as a young teenager, he was her prince charming and now he was her lover and had been for 6 months. She knew every curves of his face, she could understand his feelings just by looking deeply in his eyes. She could guess what he would say just by looking at those eyes. She loved him so much it almost hurt to. She felt she would always love him. He was her first and only love. But she wasn't. He had been with many women before, and she was younger than any of them, younger than him. Did he cared for her as much as she did for him? Could he understand her only by questionning her eyes? Did he even had a clue of what her dreams where? Did he only cared? Was this real love?
If you only knew
What I've been going threw
Waiting and wanting you
Could this be love
She softly pushed him away.
-Trunks,...I
-I'm sorry, really...I shouldn't have...
-No, it's me. I'm just tired and I think you need some sleep too, baby...
-Yeah.
He kissed tenderly her front, caressed her face a last time.
-Good night, Pan-chan
-Good night, love.
He left her and went to his room. At the moment he closed the door, she started crying silently. She was so afraid... What if she gave herself to him and he wasn't the one? What if he realized he didn't love her as much as he thought he did? What if... She wanted him so badly it hurt sometimes. And now, she was was laying on the bed, lonely, in a room next to his and all she wanted was to feel his arms around her, feeling her lips on hers. It was almost painful to think about it. She knew that if she kept pushing him away again and again, he would probably be hurted or maybe just get tired. That was what she was most afraid of; that he could get tired of her eventually.
Trunks layed down on the bed with a sigh. Pan...his love, his sweetheart. He knew something was wrong with her and he had a good clue of what that could be about. He understood she was afraid, not only because she was still a virgin, not only because she was young. He was afraid too. The bond they shared was extraordinary, unlike any he had shared before. He thought he was as in love as he could be, untill he would saw her and he'd fall in love with her over again. She was so perfect: surprising, smart, strong, beautiful, innocent and...pure. That's what made him fall for her. She wasn't one of those sluts he'd get with at parties where he had drunk way too much. She was pure: her love was true, real. He felt it inside of him, within his soul. He needed her parfum, her laugh, her voice. He didn't really care she was younger than him. He loved her, that's all that really counted. He would wait an hundred years if she needed them.
Do you know if it's true
That real love lasts a lifetime
Does it shine like the stars in the sky
The next morning when she woke up, he was sitting in a chair next to her bed, asleep. She wondered for how long he had been there, but didn't wake him. She layed down on the bed, staring at his face. He was so calm: he looked like an angel, her angel. After a while, he started to move a little, then oppened up his eyes.
-Hey..., she whispered, taking his hand.
-Hey...I'm sorry, I fell asleep. I wanted to be the first one to tell you this.
He sat next to her on the bed.
-Happy 18th birthday, Pan-chan.
-Domo...
He kissed her tenderly, then stood up.
-I called your father first thing this morning. He said he'd like you to be home at noon. He said there was something special you were aware of.
She sat on the bed.
-Yeah...Father-daughter lunch. We've been doing that ever since mom died when I was young.
-Ok...well, for this morning, I'll fix you a birthday breakfast.
-Ooooh, I don't think so.
-Why?
-I'm not eating anything you've cook. I had my lesson last time.
-T'was bad luck!
-No...Trunks, honey, pasta that bad can't just be badluck.
He laughed a little, remembering the way her face turned from happy to disgust when she tasted the diner he had fix them for their 2 months aniversary. She threw a pillow at him.
-It's not funny! I loved pasta before, now they just look so....weurk!
He laughed again and she threw him another pillow. He took it and threw it back. They started pillow fighting and soon they was feathers all over the place, all over them. They laughed so hard Vegeta soon came in with an angry look. He oppened the door at the moment Pan moved from in front of him and received the pillow that Trunks had threw her in the face. Vegeta grag the pillow angrily.
-Dad...
Vegeta grinned angrily at him, trying to keep from killing him.
-Hi, Vegeta, how are you today?, Pan said with a bright smile.
-Oh! Pan-chan! Happy birthday!, he said with a smile. He hugged her and kissed on the cheek.
It had surprise everyone, but Pan seemed to be the only "thing" Vegeta could appreciate, after Bra and sometimes Bulma. He always called her "Pan-chan" after she started to date Trunks, and he always was really nice to her. He kissed her on the cheek, always said "hi" with a smile, always remembered everything about her, such as her birthday. Trunks was surprised about it, but was glad about it. His father finally started to be "human" even though it was limited to one person and his daughter.
-Thank you Vegeta!
-So what are you doing today?, he asked.
-Dunno,...something.
-Why don't you go to a the restaurant with Trunks to have a romantic dinner?
Trunks gave him a strange look. His father and the word romantic just didn't seem to go togheter.
-...Good...idea...Dad?, he said.
-Of course, it's mine!, he said, back to normal.
-Yeah, I didn't...
-You better bring her to the best restaurant or I'll break your neck, clear?!
-Clear...
Vegeta left without another word.
-So, Vegeta's Pan-chan, what do you say about a romantic diner.
-Vegeta's Pan-chan? Ooooh, I don't think so!
-Why, you're not happy to be his second lil' princess?
-Bra's the one and only princess! Why does he like me so much?
Trunks sat on the bed.
-Maybe cause he feel you're the one who'll take me off of his shoulders for good.
She didn't notice the meaning of his words and shook the head.
-As a child, I was what he called "Goku's decent".What changed?
-No, you weren't, Gohan and Goten were, but not you. You were kinda different. You were a real fighter, just like pure saiya-jin. You loved to train, I didn't, neither did your father and Goten. And you're really strong.
He took her hand and sat her on his knees.
-And you're beautiful, and smart, and funny, and...simply amazing.
He kissed her tenderly and she kissed him back with passion. He immedialty back up.
-What?, she asked, surprised.
-Listen, baby, you know how this is gonna end...
-So?
He pushed her softly and stood up. He oppened the door to walk outside, but she grabbed his arms.
- Trunks, wait! What's wrong?
He stopped and turned around. She stood up and let his arm go to take his hand.
-Us, that's what's wrong...
She studied is eyes for the minute.
-When you say us, you mean me.
She pushed him away and stood up to leave but this time it was his turn to stop her. He shut the door and stood infront of him.
-Don't put words in my mouth, Pan! I said us...
-You better move from that door if you don't want to have an hole in your stomach or never have any use of your arms ever again, she said between her teeth, her arm crossed on her chest.
-You wouldn't...
-Just try, we'll see.
He studied her eyes but she only looked angry. He slowly moved away from the door.
Vegeta heard rapid footsteps coming downstairs. He turned around to see an angry Pan running to the door.
-Pan-chan?
He followed her and Bra came out of the living room when she heard her father's worried voice calling her bestfriend's name.
-What's up with her?
-I don't know, she seemed alright a minute ago.
-Well, run after her!
-No. I won't.
She looked at him, surprised, but didn't say a word. Suddenly, they both turn as they hear a blasting sound upstairs. Vegeta looked silently at the stairs, with apparently no intention of going there, but Bra ran upstairs. She found Trunks destroying the room where Pan had left him. The bed was burning, and the busted glass from the broken window was spread around on the floor. He hit the desk with his fist, braking it down. He then hit the wall with his open hand.
-Trunks! Stop!, Bra cried out.
He stopped immediatly, they put his front on the wall. He felt the tears falling on his cheeks, he heard himself crying, but didn't really realized he was crying. Bra walked to him with precaution, then turned him to her. Tears were rolling on his cheeks and his eyes were red. For the first time, Bra had pity for him. She had seen him covered with blood when their father almost trained him to dead, she had seen him upset about a lot of thing, but never that much. He almost looked pathetic.
-Hey! Bro...What happened?
He looked away, brushed his tears from his face.
-Trunks! Tell me!
-Don't really feel like it...
She nodded, comprehensive. She watched him walking away silently. The bed was still in flammes, but she just didn't seem to care, till Bulma came in and threw water on it.
-What's up with your brother? He destroyed the gravity chamber before, but never the guest room!
-Nothing...Gotta call Pan!
She left in an hurry.
-Yeah! Life with saiya-gin's so great!, she said sarcasticaly, staring at the burnt bed.
-Mom, tell dad that I'm not calling a young delinquent who only wants to sleep with me!
-At least SHE doesn't fight!, she said, rolling her eyes.
Trunks came down angrily. He heard his mother screaming upstairs, but he just went on walking to the door. He had to cath her. Vegeta suddenly stood between him in the door.
-You're not going anywhere!
-Vegeta, move you lousy ass from that door, or you'll regret it.
-Oh yeah? I'd like to see that. You're not going anywhere, 'coz if you do, I'll personnaly break your neck...If she doesn't.
Bra came down and ran to the phone at that moment.
-You're not calling any psycho delinquent who only wants to sleep with you.
-Funny, someone should have said that to mom when she met you.
Vegeta gave her an hard look, while keeping Trunks from the door.
- Mom, tell dad I'm not calling a young delinquent who only wants to sleep with me!
Bulma didn't answer.
-Mom!
-Vegeta, would you just get off her back!
-Alright, alright. You come with me.
He was staring at Trunks angrily. Trunks sighed, but followed his father to the gravity room. Vegeta adjust the gravity then took his shirt off.
-What the hell do you think you're going?
-Training, maybe, it will bring the steam down...Better destroying this room then destroying the guest room. Or so your mother says...
Trunks sighed, turning away to leave, but Vegeta kicked him in the back. He fell on his knees.
-Of course she dumped you, your so weak!
He turned back angrily and punched his father in the stomach.
-Don't ever say that again!
Vegeta stood up still, a cruel smile on his face.
-She didn't love you. That's why she left.
Trunks screamed with anger, then punched him in the face. Vegeta washed the blood from his cleaved lips with his hand, still smiling.
-Stop smiling like that!
-She's not coming back you know..., he said, still smiling.
-Stop!
He kept repeating that word, hitting his father again and again. Vegeta didn't react, but kept smiling. Trunks finaly stop hitting him, turned away and punched the wall. His fist transpierced the wall. Vegeta kept looking at him with his cruel smile.
-Why don't you leave me alone?
-She's worth it.
Trunks looked at him, trying to understand
-Don't get mad at her. She's worth forgetting, waiting, making sacrifices. She's one of a kind.
-Why do you act like this?
It was Vegeta's turn to try to understand. Trunks walked to him with an angry look on his face.
-Why do you act like this with her? Why is she the only one you seem to like?
Vegeta smiled again, but that smile was anything but cruel.
-It's not coz I act like it that I don't have feelings, you know. It's just that I've been hurted too often. Now, I just can't seem to care.
-Make your point.
-Your woman, I think girlfriend's the word, remember me of saiya-gins females. She's strong, she likes to fight, she's got personality, and she's pretty. And,...she's half-saiya-gin. In a strange way, she makes me feel good.
-You're kidding...?
Vegeta gave him an angry look.
-No, I'm not. You better think about that, 'coz you'll never find another girl who understands you the way she does. She's got the same passion for fighting, she knows everything you've gone through during all your life. And she's stubborn. If you let her go, she'll never come back.
Vegeta smiled to him, then started to walk to the door.
-Why the hell are you telling me all those thing? Why do you start acting like this now?
-I'm your father, you know. Even when I'm almost killing you when we train, even though I act like I don't care about what you say, even when I'm beating you up, I'm always your father. I'm not getting emotive about it, right, and I hope I'll never do that, but I don't want your life to be miserable. And I won't say no to another saïya-gin in my family, even if it's Goku's descent.
Trunks smiled, sighting with relief.
-Thanks, dad.
-Huh...,well, don't brag about it.
Vegeta left and Trunks stood there alone, thinking about what his father had just told him. He knew that all over, but he just needed someone to help him realize it. And the fact that his father was this person was quite unbelievable. But he was right. Pan was one of a kind. And he loved her, he loved her so much.
He took off his shirt, and started to fight, hoping it would help him to evacuate his anger.
Do you know if it's true
That real love lasts a lifetime
Does it shine like the stars up in the sky
And do you know if you can fall for
Just a moment
Is a moment for all time
Pan was laying on her bed, crying. She had flew back home as fast as she could. The phone rang and she let it ring for five times before she decided to answer.
-Hello?
-Pan, hey! It's Bra. You're alright?
-Dunno, I don't feel so good...Trunks told you all about it, huh?
-No! He wouldn't tell me anything. He looked pretty upset...What leads me to think something very bad happened.
-Well...not really, but I think I did a huge mistake.
-How huge?
-I menaced him.
-What?
-I told him I would hurt him really, really bad if he wouldn't move away from the door.
-And,...scuze me, but why exactly wouldn't he move from the door?
Pan sighed, sat back on her bed, then said,
-I don't we argued about something that as been on for many weeks.
-Sex.
-What!? Well, not exactly. Huh! I don't know! Bra, we keep talking about it without saying the right words, without really talking about it.
-So? What's up about it?
-I don't...I don't really understands what's happening. I love him Bra, I really do. But...
-You don't want to have sex with him.
-What! No! You're kidding!
-So what?
-Bra...I'm afraid that if something goes wrong, it's gonna break everything we ever shared.
She waited for Bra's answer, or comment, but her bestfriend kept silent.
-I mean, how was it for you?
-Pan, my experience doesn't really qualifies for the comparison. I was drunk, too drunk, I met a drunk guy, we flirted, we got even more drunk, then we had sex. Never even heard of him again. You and Trunks, it's a totaly different story.
-I know that...but that's not the point.
-It's understandable that you're afraid, but you shouldn't be. If things were such superficial that having sex would destroy your relationship, you would't be so afraid. That fear's there because your love's more deep. And I know Trunks' afraid too.
-No...he's not afraid...
-Damn, Pan, are you so blind? Why would he destroy the guest room if he wasn't? He was so angry...He even cried, Pan, Trunks cried because of you.
Pan felt guilty for a second, then a smiled appeard on her face.
-Bra, what are you doing this afternoon?
-Nothing, but what's the point?
Gohan sat in front of his daughter in the coffee house. She was very silent, but she looked peaceful.
-So, how does it feel to be 18?
-Doesn't really feel different than being 17.
-But you look different. I don't know...serene.
-Then I guess I am.
-Huh...
He didn't really know what to say to her. It just seemed that he didn't understand her anymore. They used to be close when she was young, after Videl died, bringing them even closer, but since she had another man in her life, they didn't talk much. He missed her. She was the only one he had left, since his mother and father both died in a car accident a year ago, and Goten was far away on a trip around the world. And now, she was getting older, and she would soon go away, with Trunks or with some other man.
-So, how's Trunks?
She swallowed her coffee with difficulty. She silently looked at him for a second, then said,
- I guess I screw things big time.
-What?
She put her cup of coffee on the table, then said,
-There's something I'd like to know, and I don't want you to get angry, or afraid, or to start screaming.
He looked suspicious, but nodded the head.
-Trunks and I, we've been togheter for 6 months and...
-You're pregnant..., he said, looking a little tense.
-No!...But eventually, there will be a time were our relationship will move on to that next level.
He smiled, nodding, then said,
-You wanna know how things went on between your mother and I.
She looked at him, surprise, then laughed.
-You know, dad, you're not as clueless as I thought.
-Huh?
-Nothing.
-Well...I don't know for her, but I, was scared to death. We had been dating for four or five months, and everything was perfect. Your mother was so beautiful. I don't know if you remember how incredible she was.
She looked at him, amazed. A serene smile appeard on her face as she remembered her mother's perfume, her voice, her laugh. She was really young when Videl died, but she would always remember those things. The bond between a child and it's mother's stronger than death.
-Sometimes I'm afraid to forget about her, you know. I miss her when I sleep, I miss her whenever I breath. I miss her all the time with you. I'm always wondering if I'm doing things the right way, if I'm a good father.
-Mmm...dad...You're a great father...
He shook the head, trying to keep the tears from rolling on his cheeks. He smiled, then took his daughter's hand upon the table.
-You know, I'll love your mother till the day I die. Even though I don't see her anymore, even though she's not with me, I know I'll always love her. It's just something so strong...I know it's gonna last forever. You know the feeling?
-Yeah, I know the feeling.
He smiled to her, happy for her, then the next thing he knew, tears were rolling all over his cheeks.
-Love you dad.
He smiled again.
-Gee, I love you so much!
If you could read my mind
You know I just can't hide
What I feel inside
Pan slowly entered the gravity chamber, without a sound. Trunks was training like mad, punching the air. She brought down the gravity to normal and Trunks turned to her.
-...Wow!, he said, seeing her.
She was wearing a satin dark red dress, sexy, but not too much. Her hair were tied up beautifully, she had make-up on and was wearing tiny diamond earings and a silver necklace.
-Hey...
He kept silent, still shocked. She seemed shy, and was about to go away when he said,
-Hey, Pan, you look...great!
-Thanks. Trunks, about the things I said this morning 'bout hurting you...I didn't mean them, I was just angry, and...
-It's okay...
He grabbed a towel and sponged up the sweat that covered his neck and face.
-I just wanted to say, I'm sorry.
-Is that why you're all dressed up like that?
-You don't like it?
-You kiddin! You look incredible in that dress! I was just wondering why you were so chic.
-I had bought it for tonight, and I decided to wear it even though...
-What?
She seemed to think, then a discret smile appeard on her lips.
-Even though you blasted the guest room.
He smiled too, also thinking it hadn't been such a bright idea to do that.
-So, bye!, she said, turning to the door.
-Hey! Don't leave!
-What?, she said, turning back to him.
She laughed a little when she saw the smile on his face. That mysterious smile always announced something important, bad or good.
-You bought that wonderful dress for tonight, let's show it! I'm bringing you to the restaurant, as I've promised you.
-Trunks, you don't have to do that! Not after what I've said, and plus, all restaurants are full at that time.
-I made a reservation two weeks ago Pan-chan.
She smiled when she heard him call her that way. She felt releaved.
-Just let me take a shower, and we'll get going.
-Alright...
They left the gravity chamber and Trunks went to take his shower. Pan went in the living room, watched the T.V. for a while, then she went upstairs. She oppened the door to the guest room . The bed was half-burned, and a chilly wind was coming from the broken window. There was many holes in the walls and the desk was laying, broken in two on the floor. She crossed her arms on the chest.
-Why have you destroyed everything?, she said without moving. She had felt his ki.
-I did it for the same reason you said you'd hurt me. I was angry.
-You did this all because you were angry at me?
-No, I was angry at me.
-What?, she turned to him.
He was wearing a tuxedo, and had a charming smile on his face. He took her hand, then said,
-Let's just not talk about that, alright? We've gotta get going.
Later that night, Trunks and Pan were slowly walking down the dark streets of the city, holding hands. They hadn't talk much during the diner, trying to avoid the subject that had seperate them the same morning. Even though it only happened a few hours ago, it seemed like if their fight had occur centuries ago.
- So, that was a great night, wasn't it?, Trunks said as they walked toward Capsule Corp.
-Yeah..., she softly answered, looking up at Trunks' face.
He smiled to her and she smiled back, but they both could feel the incomfort that stood between them both.
-It was perfect, Pan said, stopping down the steps.
-So, you want me to drive you home, or...
-I was more thinking about coming in...
Trunks looked a little surprise, but after a moment of silence, he nodded slowly. She nodded back and they started to walk up the stairs. The entered an empty house.
-Where is everyone?
-Funny how you're the one who lives in this house and I'm the one who knows what's going on in it. You're sister sleeping at the Son house while your mother litteraly dragged your father at her cousin's wedding.
-Huh...Good to know, he said, and you knew that?
-Of course...
-And you wanted to come in, even though...
- Not even though...I wanted to come in because...
He was shocked for a moment, then he smiled, putting is arms around her thin waist.She put her arms around his neck and they kissed soflty.
After they kissed, she slowly pulled him upstairs, as he was half smiling, half wondering if it was good. She pushed the door to his room, then turned around to face him. She kissed him even more soflty then she did earlier and as she did, Trunks started to wonder what was really happening. He gently pushed her away for him. She looked into his eyes, like if she was asking what was wrong.
-Pan,...I know this has been hard on you, but you don't have to...
-I know that..., she whispered, reached for his tie. She loosen it and he didn't protest, until she started to untie his buttons. He took her hand in his and whispered,
-No...Pan,
-You wanna know why I'm doing this? It's for the same reason you slept in a chair by my side last night, it's for the same reason you've been waiting for me for so long and wait you never complained.
-Pan...I
-No, Trunks, listen...I love you
He smiled to her, then nodded slowly, looking down at her hands that he was still holding. He pulled them to his lips, then kissed them tenderly.
-I love you too, he said, bringing a smiled to her lips.
-You see...That's why...
They kissed and this time, he was the first to reach out to untie her dress' zipper. The dress fell down on the floor with his lounge suit, then his shirt. She softly caressed his chest with one hand as he untied her hair and passed his fingers threw it. They started kissing against and he picked her in his arms, still kissing her. He brought her to the bed where he layed her down carefully.
-Trunks..., she murmured as he kissed her down the neck. She caressed his hair down his nape. He came back to her lips and their hands joigned. A wave of pain ran through her whole body as he penetrated her slowly, squeezing her hand even more in his, but still carefully.
They both started to sigh and lament as they came closer to heaven. Her heart was beathing harder then it ever did as he caressed her face with his fingers, kissing her front. Her fingers were running down his body as they reached ecstasy.
The sun rays where caressing his face when he woke up. He felt the warmth of her body against him and he smiled, holding her closer. He knew he could stay there, staring at that faces, for hours. He knew every curves of it, but yet he still was fascinated by it. Pan, is pure love
End
Song: Could This Be Love
By: Jennifer Lopez
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