It Could've Been Me
By Birdee
Summary: Marron just got married to Uub. But what about Trunks? A T/M songfic with a mention G/B but nothing more. Really sad.
Disclaimer: I don't own DragonBall Z. And I don't own the song "It Could've been Me" which is owned by Billy Ray Cyrus, the writers and record company and all that crap.
Author's Rant: Hi! This is my first *real* songfic. AND my first *real* T/M. Oh, goodie. Flame if you want; If you flame because it's not T/P I'll get a good laugh. ^_^
Author's *important* Notes: ~*~ means song lyrics. I also changed some lyrics ('My buddy John' just didn't sound as good for this fic as 'My buddy Goten' hehe ^_~)
It Could've Been Me
~*~I hear you just got married~*~
I looked out into the deep evening sky. "If only," I said out loud, my throat aching as I held back the urge to cry. Damn Uub. He had taken the only love I had ever had. Marron.
But I knew it wasn’t Uub’s fault at all. I had waited too long. Marron had needed security, she had needed unconditional love. "But I was going to offer..." I started, fading out. I growled softly.
~*~Took a month long honeymoon~*~
I coughed, thinking about what Uub was doing with her now. Probably walking along a beach somewhere, laughing and smiling. I wished I could have made her that happy. But the worst part was, I didn’t need to wish or wonder. I could have made her that happy. If only I had said so earlier. If only I had asked before Uub, would Marron had said yes?
~*~And you were all smiles at the wedding
You cried when you kissed the groom~*~
Or did she not like me at all? No. Marron wouldn’t show misguided affection like that. She did love me, at one time or another. But damn, I still loved her. I still DO love her. I thought about the way her hair shimmered in the moonlight, the night I first feel in love with her. I grinned and remembered how she let me kiss her when I was only fourteen, to impress some girl at my school.
She had done all that... even though she had confessed later that she had loved me even then, and it was torture to see me go with that girl with her help. She had done it because she loved me.
But now I know what torture is.
~*~I got no invitation
I guess the mailman didn't bring it to me~*~
Did Marron not want to confess that she was getting married? She should have told me... it would have made me feel a whole lot more comfortable in the end.
It wouldn’t have been that much better though. Just a few more seconds of suffering. The suffering I will feel the rest of my life because I wasn’t there when she needed me to be; And Uub was.
~*~But I see the whole thing in slow motion
Every night as I try to sleep~*~
I watched the tear fall to the ground. She was the only one I ever loved, the only one I will ever love. She made me so happy. And in a way, it would make me happy if she was content, but I knew she could be happier.
"No offense or anything Uub, but she was meant for me."
I frowned, thinking of the day she asked me.
"Ha, she asked me to marry her."
And being the bastard I am, I said no. I told her to give it time. I told her to let ourselves get finished with college and see what our lives would be like then.
The worst mistake I ever made my entire life.
Though she seemed to take it well, I saw it was killing her inside. I reconsidered and said yes, but she refused, telling me I was right, that she was stupid for thinking that our love mattered more than our education.
I was such a jerk. "I didn’t mean it like that!" I shouted out loud. People looked over at me and I blushed. Marron meant more than anything I could ever dream up. Why had I turned her down?
But I knew the answer to that question too. I was scared.
"Scared of what?" I thought now. Of a happy life? Of being with the person you love more than the world forever?
I didn’t know.
I got up and shifted all thoughts from my head away. I walked away too. I’d like to think I was walking away from my troubles, but I knew they would follow.
~*~My buddy Goten said you looked real pretty
And you acted like you were in love~*~
Yeah, you ‘acted’. "Were you really in love Marron?" I spoke to know one I particular. "Or did you need that grasp of who you were... the feeling you weren’t alone. I thought I could give you that feeling."
~*~He said the preacher asked for objections
And he thought about standing up~*~
Good ol’ Goten. He knew how it was. Ever since he had married my sister, he was rooting for me and Marron. He told me he ‘knew’ we’d end up together. "Friends from the beginning, friends ‘til the end," he would always say.
He completely ignored the fact that his new best friend was my sister.
~*~I told Goten he must have been crazy
'Cause you were just about to say ‘I do.’~*~
That’s what I told him. I knew he would make Marron feel so bad by doing that. In fact, she’d hate me forever most probably. At least I could still see her. Look upon her fondly and joke with her, just like we used to. But I wasn’t kidding myself, nothing would ever be the same between us. Maybe It would have been better if Goten had said something.
~*~He just gave me a wink and said all he could think
Was it could've been me with you~*~
And I wouldn’t let him see it, but knowing he thought for sure that me and Marron was a sure thing made me go into a temper tantrum later. I seemed to be out in the woods for no reason and blowing things up. After all, that’s what a saiyan is supposed to do right? Have a ‘tantrum’ but never cry. Crying was against the rules.
Plus the fact I couldn’t let Marron see how much she hurt me.
~*~It could've been me
Standing there with you
It could've been me
And my dreams coming true
But those dreams move on
If you wait too long.
It took me 'til now to see
It could've been me~*~
If only I had stayed by her side the whole time. If only I could feel her warm touch again, could I get her to change her mind? Could I reach into her heart and find that certain place I had touched before that made her love me? Would she ever take me back?
I guess what’s done is done. I couldn’t just undo everything.
~*~I don't guess I ever told you
That I went out and bought you a ring~*~
I buried my hand in my pocket, searching for that small box I had been keeping for a couple weeks.
~*~I even carried it around in my pocket
Waiting to say the right thing~*~
"God," I cried, holding my head in my hands. "I was going to say something! I was going to spend the rest of my life with her!" But no. Uub had to come. Sweep her off her feet for how long? It seemed like such a short time. And the next thing I knew... they were married. And I was a old piece of trash, thrown to the side, away from my only love.
I opened the box and looked at the diamond. I would have given her everything. I bought this for her, but every time I got up the nerve to ask her, something went wrong.
~*~I pulled it out the other day
But the diamond had lost its shine~*~
Looking at it, it looked like a pearl. Imperfect and murky. But I knew it would never look beautiful again, unless it was on her hand.
~*~Well, I know how it feels 'cause my eyes grow dim
When I think you could have been mine~*~
Because it was the only thing I ever wanted.
~*~It could've been me
Standing there with you~*~
I know it’s another stupid reason, but we look so much better together than her and Uub or me and anyone else. I’ll never be able to look happy without her standing beside me.
~*~It could've been me
And my dreams coming true~*~
Being with her would be the best thing that ever happened to me.
~*~But those dreams move on
If you wait too long~*~
I waited for the right moment that never came. Something tells me I’ll never find what I had with Marron again. Her or anyone else.
~*~It took me 'til now to see
It could've been me~*~
And I would have been the happiest man on earth, if she’d let me be.
~*~I know I called you just in time to be too late~*~
I can’t help but wonder what might had happened if I had called her a few days earlier. Maybe it would be me standing next to her in that picture on the wall; her in the white dress, me in the tux which I would gladly wear for her. Maybe I’d be the one that she was frolicking with at the beach.
~*~You know dreams move on if you wait too long~*~
I know it all too well now. If I ever get another chance, I’ll take it. I promise.
~*~It took me 'til now to see that
It could've been me
Standing there with you
It could've been me
And my dreams coming true
But those dreams move on
If you wait too long.
It took me 'til now to see
It could've been me~*~
I looked longingly into a picture that was folded and unfolded so many times. Me and her. And a smile graced both our faces.
It could've been me.
End
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