I suppose it all kicked off about 2 years ago when i knew Reb, Trav and Hutch quite well, and every friday i would meet Reb, maybe Hutch aswell, but rarely Trav, he would make his own way up there later on.
It would begin with me meeting Reb and I'd take a bottle of something with me, just some shitter i managed to nick out the rents private collection, like a bottle of the strongest wine i could find. We would go round the back of St. Michaels church and down it as fast we could to get the full effect, at this time Hutch did not drink with us, for some reason.
But after this we would venture up to Pitt and knock for some people, or just go straight up to Gatland and meet them up there and have a laugh. Then later on, when we all drank, we'd get a bottle or two of white lightning from the local shop Ben's, which is now under new management so the original people arent there anymore.
But we moved on to this and got majorly pissed, the lot of us that is, and then go home totally wankered, make a sandwich and throw it straight back up. Also we had many laughs, such as the time i got fucked on white lightning, when Reb broke chris's leg and many more.
This was possible our Greatest Era, we had no worries of school, totally care free, and a bottle of cider would get us wankered... So... enjoy...
It started when I (Meag) met Reb and we went up to Gatland to meet the Pitt Crew and co. and we got there and somehow got a few beers and shit, cant remember how we got it cos it was ages ago. But about 15 minutes later everyone turned up, like the whole of town, first off saw, Trav, Beeney, Span come round the corner, then the rest appeared, Hutch was of course with them.
We sat on the grass by the top gatland bus stop, and realised there was too many people, so some of us moved to where the sign post is, which had previously been broken by some gay, and just left on there, and unsuspectingly i sat on it, and just fell flat on my back. By this time both Me and Reb had been drinking for some time, and were reasonably pissed, decided to venture off for a bit and get away from the madness.
Upon our little journey i saw a roller in someones front garden, with a sign saying, 'Free, Just take it' and i couldn't believe my eyes, i thought this must have been too good to be true. So i knocked on the elderly old folks door, and asked if it was really free, and so i made up some excuse about my dad wanting it.
Then upon trying to push it home and running it into various bushes and trees, we finally made our way back to where we were originally, they could all here this rumbling, and at that precise moment, out came me from round the corner with this massive concrete roller, to the amusement of other i accidently ran it into the road when a car was coming.
I wheeled it up to them and sat on it for a bit, until i got bored and decided to roll it down Gatland Lane as fast as i could. And fuckin hell was it loud, it was like an earthquake, the whole ground was shaking, and it caused many a head to turn, so we ran, (by then alot of people had left) we went through the alley and through a little estate and back through a gap in the houses, where on our way stole some garden light things from someones front garden.
After this we plodded round chamberlain for a bit, and went down some shitty road, where i climbed a tree and fell out, it kained obv, but cant remember much, Me and Reb then said farewell to everyone, and went home along upper fant, possible the longest and gayest road ever, where we noticed it was practically all full of black people, no offence to people, just stating a fact. But then we just went home.
I (Hutch), Trav, Reb, Meag decided we might as well go. At about 7pm we went to get the train to Staplehurst. All the lems were waiting at the station as well. When the train finally arrived we all legged it on to it and jumped on these seats. The first laugh came when the train bloke comes along and nobody wanted to pay for their tickets. He was like well you can get off then. Eventually we decided to pay. I have still got my ticket at home. I might frame it and put it on my wall.
Anyway the train was off and we were all having a laugh. We were all looking forward to this party. We got to paddock wood station where we had to change train to get to Staplehurst. I can remember I was with spider and she needed the toilet so we went 4 a walk looking for one and found one in some Indian restaurant and I actually saw someone I know which was like amazing. After the walk I remember waiting at the station 4 ages and reb and me were having a laugh because this Eurostar train kept coming whizzing past and we was just saying random shit like just run in front of it. Our train finally came along and before we knew it we was in Staplehurst. All the lems were there and the Pack including the well famous member Alice. The pack is these older lems who think they are cool when really they are these sad twats who bum iron maiden. When everyone was there the pack announce that it is a fifty-minute walk to the house where the party is. We were like fukin hell as it was freezing that night. I can remember meag kept going its too cold.
The walk seemed like forever. I can remember walking with different people. First it was Span then reb and meag and the final part trav. When we finally arrived we came to a massive house. We all stepped into the hallway. On oneside was this massive kitchen with all these sweets and alcohol. The other side was the front room with beers in. We all bundled into the front room. There weren’t really much booze. Meag and reb were a bit tipsy and started to fuck around. Meag was wearing these silver shades and it was well funny. He then knocked all these marble things everywhere. All these classic moments then kept happening. Next a kid called Ollie who was only about 12 then was walking round the front room and this dog kept following him and was actually humping his leg. It was well funny. Then one of the highlights of the night came next. Meag needed a piss and went outside. We were all in the front room and suddenly we saw meag at the window like pulling these faces. I had a bad feeling that he was gonna smash the window as he was banging it slightly and what does he do. CRACK! . The window slightly smashes. His face was a classic like turned from having a laugh to shit what I have done. As he done it a member of the pack walked in. As meag came in he was like apologising to this bloke and I was in stitches. He still hasn’t paid for that window.
After about an hour we got kicked out and we were at least 8 miles away from home. They said we could sleep in this shed so we ended up sleeping in some old shed on a freezing night. The shed had loads of holes in it and we were blocking them up. There was about eight of us in the shed. Trav, Reb, Meag, Npt, Span, Nikaela, Pete and me (hutch). It was so cold that night. Trav and Span were all right as they had a huge chair and were cuddling to keep warm. Nickaela was on the floor with Pete trying to keep warm. Reb was sitting on a deckchair that was on top of a trampoline. Npt was just paralytic in the corner while me and meag were up all night trying to keep warm. After about 10 mins Alice a member of the pack came bursting in threatening us with his 2x4. He looked such a twat with his long hair, tight jeans and an Iron Maiden T-shirt. From then on we have ripped the shit out of him until the present day. He now has a successful career in a key and lock shop where they do not actually sell anything. Anyway after this In the middle of the night meag and me were looking for stuff in the shed. We found a cassette player and loads of cassettes. Meagle amusingly broke half of them and then suddenly … we found… A HAIRDRYER. We immediately switched it on, full blast on warm air. Meag and me were just taking it in turns using the hairdryer. I can remember meag putting the hairdryer up his top and he looked like Rik Waller. Then came along what I think was the funniest moment of the night. Meag and me were planning the way home seeing what time the first train comes, as we wanted to get away early, as the pack didn’t want to see the ruined shed. Suddenly we heard a great crash and there was reb on the floor where he had fell of his chair. Everybody woke up laughing. The first train arrived at the station at 7.09 so we decided to leave at 5.30.
We all sneaked out of the shed and quietly steeped over some gate and then we were free in some country road that smelled of that farm shit. The way back was easy, as it was only 2 long roads we had to walk along. We made our way back and arrived at the station at 6.30. As we arrived there, there was some market opening by the station. We were like how good. Pete bought an orange and an apple. Reb bought some burger that he thought he had food poisoning from and I bought about 10 bags of these chocolate animals. The train arrived on time and we were on our way. We changed at paddock wood station and walked around there for a bit. Another classic moment happened. We asked a local resident where the nearest shop was and he was like fuck off. He was in a well bad mood. He was walking about 3 dogs and 1 of them he didn’t noticed that he wasn’t holding the lead. We bought some food from the shop and got the train home. The ticket bloke didn’t ask us to pay, as he knew we wouldn’t have any money. As we arrived back in Maidstone we said our good-byes and went home. As I got in I went to bed and I was still shaking about an hour later after it was so cold. If it wasn’t for the hairdryer I don’t think meag and me would be here now.
Anyway this might sound a bit boring but it was one of those classic moments in our lives where you have to be there to see what a classic day it was.
