- Whats red, spicy, and tastes good on everything? -
Thats right buddy. Tabasco sauce. And im not talking about that generic shit you buy at your local im-not-good-enough-to-be-called-name-brand food store. Real men put tabasco on EVERYTHING. And when i say everything i mean i put it on my eggs in the morning to my baked chicken dinner and mashed potatoes. I unfortunatly have quite a few friends that dont share my love for the red stuff. You can put tabasco sauce on everything and it will not taste like shit.
I enjoy their product so much i went online as to find out how its made, and its a pretty intriquing process. i Thought they just mashed a bunch of shit together with vinegar and slap a label on it and send it out the door, but boy was i surely mistaken. The peppers are crushed, put in jars with vinegar and salt for a long time, and then they stir it for a long time too. The result is a delicious spicy red sauce that you can eat on anything. Here is what I suggest putting Tabasco sauce on:
EVERYTHING !!!!
If you are eating with somebody and you have some tabasco, offer to share your wealth. If they refuse, dont take no for an answer. You have to be real tough with these people. I mean REAL tough. You have to act real tough and manly around them so they feel intimidated, and it helps you feel better about yourself. If they start to bitch and moan about you being "too mean", tell them you're insecure about yourself, and that making fun of others makes you feel better. And if that still doesnt work, douse their food with it anyway and call them a bitch.
EAT TABASCO SAUCE ON EVERYTHING OR GO JUMP OFF A BRIDGE