RaNtS, RavEs & KraZy TaLk
Here it goes....
Everytime I have a day off, which is hardly ever, some asshole has to put a damper on it. Yup, so me and my bike decide to go for a cruise. I get 5 blocks from my house and out of no where comes this whor....cop. Anyway, she rolls down her window and is all "didnt you see that stop sign?" And I was like "The one I just ran?" Then she proceded to lecture me on trafic rules and bikes and my age and everything you could possible be lectured on. Then came the $5500000 question, "Do you want me to write you up a $40 ticket?" Duuuuuuuuuh! She told me she really should cuz I was gonna cause an accident....then I proceded to point out the fact SHE was the one driving on the wrong side of the street...bad idea. Cops don't find pointing out the obvious very amusing. I didnt get a ticket, but I would have rather paid $40 then have to talk to her for those long 5 minutes.
Elect a damn president already. I think they should just can both of em and find a new guy cuz both Gore and Bush are two of the biggest wankers I've ever seen. I admit, I didnt vote this year. What the hell was the point? They're both equally retarded. There isnt any reason to keep either of em cuz only half the country is gonna back em up and the other half is gonna be pissed of for four years. Americans are grouchy enough as it is....
Why is it that everytime I think I've met the perfect guy they turn out to be an even bigger dickface then the last one? Tell me. I'd really like to know. Yes, I am bitching about guys. Deal with it. I have to be a whiny chick every once and while. Anyway, so there was this guy I was absessing about for like months. He was seriously the most gorgeous guy I have ever seen. I fell for him the first time I saw him...this was before I found out he was into punk and all that krazy stuff. So anyway, I finally got up the nerve to talk to him and we hung out a couple times and I fell head over board in love with him cuz he seemed to be the sweetest guy in the world......until he instead of being honest with me he just turns into a jackass. Why??!!! I don't understand! I don't know where this is going...Is this making you guys paranoid? You think it's about you don't ya?!! Hahahaha...it probably is...
So me and one of my friends are out cruisin'on our bikes at about...oooh...1am. Mindin'our own business(or so we thought). We met up with some other kids, also on bikes who were a little on the wasted side. So we cruise on into this gas station to talk to some kid in a car and all of a sudden this donut eating, kid harrassing, beeeootch in a car with flashing lights comes ramping into the station and jumps/rolls out of her car and yells"Everyone freeze!" Of course most of the ripped kids take off and tear off to a house about a block away cuz they don't want to get busted for anything...so the nice people my friend and I are we stay there so the cop doesnt try and chase em down..and theres one other kid there cuz he was to wasted to even ride away. So Chunky the cop starts righting us warnings for not having licences on our bikes and yells at us for riding on the street. So we occupy the cop long enough for the really wasted kid to make his break before she trys to talk to him and realizes he has a backpack full of beer and reaks of alchohol. Yeah, so we get our warning and ride away and the cop follows us...only to have the drunkasses mentioned earlier come runnin'down the street towards us and bearly missing the cop as she comes coasting around the corner. So now theres this chaotic mess of drunks and cops flyin'everywhere. The moral of this story...well...run away from the cops, NOT towards them...bad news.
What a ass backwards world this is. This old guy comes into the DQ and orders some crap and asks for a senior discount and I'm like"ah, we dont have one." And he's all turning into a smart ass"..thats good for business." Now, this guy pulled into the parking lot in a 2000 Jeep. Like he can't afford to pay an extra 10cents. Shouldn't WE, the kids, the unfortunat victums of poverty be the ones getting the discount? Yes. I think so.
The other night I went for a run, well I guess it was the other morning. So, there I was running down the main street of my "lovely" town at 3:30AM, just me and my dog. All of a sudden this pig, er, cop comes tearin' down the street towards me, pulls over and jumps out of his BaconMobile. He starts askin' me all these weird questions about me and my dog. It turns out that some stupid ars called in a dog complaint around where I was runnin', and eventhough there are 10 Gazillion dogs in this town, the cop thought it was mine. Now, call me retaaaded, but if I was a cop I'd be more concerned with the fact that theres a girl, alone, running down the street at 3:30 in da mornin' instead of working my undies into a bunch over a dog and gettin' all ticket happy. I HATE COPS!
STOP DRINKIN' AND DRIVIN' GODDAMIT!
Recently in the news, you probably heard about it someplace, a 6 year old boy shot a girl in his kindergarten class. Now the whole story goes somethin’ like this, it’s a quick run down, this little boy and his sister were in custody of their mother. Their mom got evicted so they decided to crash with their mother’s bro in his crackhouse. Yeah, a crackhouse, their uncle sold guns and drugs for a living. Sooo, this little 6 year old gets in a spat with this chick at school, finds one of the numerous loaded guns lying around the house, takes it to school looks at the little girl, he says “I don’t like you.” and shoots the little girl in the neck at almost point blank range. Holy for disturbing. The big thing now is that this little kid is too young to know whats up and he was sent to live with his aunt. I’m honestly having a hard time comprehending this whole situation. Considering the kids living environment and lack of guidance and the fact he’s just a baby at six years of age, should the kid have a harsher punishment, I mean he did end another life, another babies life? But at the same time this kid already had a name as a trouble maker, where were the teachers? The parents? Anyone? And how could you let a kid live in a crackhouse, a place littered with drugs, loaded guns, alcohol and trash? So who is to blame, this little six year old boy or the turned heads of society...hmmm...it’s a tough call....
Stupid girls. Over the weekend, and what a crazy ars weekend it was, I encountered a prime example of the digressive youth of today. Now these little beyotches were given their fair chance, so don’t go thinkin’ I’m a harsh-ass. So anyway, theres this group of about 6 girls out at this bonfire, all of them were aprox. 16 years young. They were loud, obnoxious, immature, they had the obsessive swearing and drunken-attention-seeking-retardedness down cold...oi...*time out* You must realize that friends are extreeeemely important to me and if it weren’t for my friends I’d be dead in a gutter someplace choking on my own vomit. *time in* So at about 4 am one of the girls gets “ill”. She pukes till she can’t even stand anymore, her friends ignoring her the entire time. So now, not only is she puking, she is laying on the cold dirt in a puddle of her own puke. I’m sittin’ there thinkin’ one her 5 friends are gonna help her out...booooy was I wrong....they stood in a circle arguing about who was gonna sleep next to her....what-the-fuck? I felt bad for her, I did. Even though I couldn’t stand her I took it upon myself to help her cuz thats the kind of kid I am, of course the whole time I was handing out verbal lashings to her friends. Point being....if your one of these kind of people I hope you learned from my story(Don’t ignore people, especially friends, in their times of need), if not, someday your friends are gonna let you choke on your own puke.
Pigs. Need I say more? I don't really, buuut I have a story for you. Recently on a trip to WY, the cowboy state mind you, I had yet another lovely run in with da Police. Heres the deal, it's 8am, I'm pumped full of coffee, I've been up since 5am, I'm runnin' on an hour of sleep and I've never drivin' this road before in my life, nor do I want to ever again. Sooo we're cruisin' along at a comfortable highway speed of Aprox. 65mph when we start approaching a hick infested town in South Dakota(I've taken upon myself the responsibility of giving SD a new nickname, The F*cking A**hole State). The speed limit drops from 65 ta 40. Nearing the center of the town I'm thinkin' the speed limit can't be 40 anymore, so I drop on down to 25. Sooo, right on the outskirts of Hickville, I glance in mirror and what do I see? No. Not the Clause and his acid-filled raindeer, but a FAT ass cop in his flaming pig car. Yeah, so I pull over and he's all like "You were going kind of fast." And I was like "I was going 25mph...." And he was all "...25mph in a SCHOOL ZONE!!! HAHAHAHHA!!!" Then his eyes turned all red and glowy and there were horns and smoke poored out his nose and he wrote me up a $68 dollar ticket for going 10mph over the speed limit. Who puts a school zone in the middle of a freaking highway...eh? Only Officer Asslick knows the answer.
Can I get some respect please? This prom king reject came into my place of work today right? Just agree with me. He wasn't even standing at the counter for 30 seconds and I walked right past him so I could put something away and was gonna come right back. I mean my whole mission would have taken 30 seconds at the most. Anywooo, the kid looks at me, totally ignoring the fact that I'm 3 years older then he is, and says "Hey! Can I get some service here?!" I ignore the fact that he's an asshole and restrain myself from spitting in his food. I turn around only to discover that he has gone and sat down and is waiting for ME to bring HIM his food. He looks at me, I look at him. He keeps sitting there. What-the-hell? Whats with these kids? I mean it's not so much the fact that I'm older, it's the fact that I show these little fuckers respect and they can't return it. Grrrr....
Ah ha. Heres one for ya. Bragging burnouts. Lets get one thing straight. Mary-ja-wanna is a friend of mine. Light one up, burn one down. It's all right with me. Heres whats not kewl (I've noticed it mostly with the younger kids). You've got all these kids runnin' around braggin' about how burnt they are(most of em hardly even smoke, but they think its kewl and want to be a badass or something). You ask em a question and their answers contain the words "high","weed","fucked up" or "stoned". So the conversation goes like this:
"How goes it?"
"I'm sooooo high! Man, Im am fucked up!"
"Hmm..thats kewl. Whatcha been up to?"
"Jus' smokin' weeeed man. Jus' gettin' stoned..."
"Ah. Thats great. What are you doin' tonight?"
"I just sold my soul for a quarter..what do you think I'm doin'?"
"Um yeah. Well, Im gonna go now...."
"smoke some weed?"
"Uuuummm no. I'm goin' to work"
"...work on gettin' some weed?"
"Nooo!" Ya'll get the point. It jus' gets old ya know? They can't even carry on a normal conversation cuz they're to busy trying to impress everyone. It's sad really.
Sunday, Sunday, Sunday drivers...what's with these slow-ass mofos anyway? You'd think after they get the finger so many times they'd learn to speed up a little. Doesn't the fact that I could run(and I can't run that fast)beside their car, open their door, pull em out of their Buick in 35mph zone and kick their ass mean anything to them? Damn.
North Dakota. Like I said, the flaming capital of the world. Those of you here live here know whats up(which isn't much). Those of you that don't live here...don't ever visit, unless of course your coming to see me. Unless your a hick and thrive on desolate wasteland filled with horse shit and cows, this is not the place to be. I know what your thinkin', this is your home. Let me tell you, I might live here and by definition it may be my "home", but in my mind this place will NEVER EVER be my home. Fuck my "home". My homes someplace with trees, the Pacific ocean and more people then livestock. If there was one mountain in this state, I'd climb it so I could look over the entire state and give it the finger.
As for life....I'm so tired of hearing all this "life sucks" crap. Yeah, we all have are fair share of dogshyt. What doesn't kill ya, only makes you stronger. Trust me. When life hands you lemons, give life the finger, whip the lemons back at em and run away laughing and screaming obsinities. If you can't learn to laugh at life your gonna dig yourself a hole so deep your gonna be perma fryin' in a lava core.
PUNK ROOOOOOOCK!!!!!!!!!! PuNks not dead! What the hell are you kids talking about?! PuNk will never die, ya know why? As long as there is life there will be youth. As long as there is youth, there shall be rebelion. As long as there is rebelion, there shall be PuNk RoCk. Told ya so.
So PaCk tHat iN yEr PiPe aND SmOke iT!