Wanted and Missing Posters (HA really cheap looking ones!)
The Boy on the Milk Carton
Where did Benji no-last-name go?! I'm afraid that the missing Benji no-last-name, the cute guitarist of Good Charlotte with the pink patch, might be injured and stuck in a ditch somewhere, with possibly 2 broken legs. There might even be some wild squirrels knawing on him. Heck, he might even be dead, but let's think happy thoughts. We MUST find him! We must find the punk, muscular guitarist who use to have sexy, massive mohawks and liberty spikes, and who wore pink hair in such a manly fashion. If you see him, send him to my house because I want to makeout with him.
WANTED: BENJI IMPOSTER!
We must get rid of this Benji Madden, who has replaced precious Benji no-last-name in the band Good Charlotte. I suspect he might have eaten Benji no-last name, but I hope I'm wrong. This Benji Madden is not attractive, and it's bringing him to tears, and I really think he should clean up the dripping eyemakeup after he sobs. This Benji dresses in total black, which, along with the tears, implies that he must be depressed. And I think that singing further songs about being a "loser" will just drive him to suicide. Not to mention, this Benji is a total MTV tool, lacking in sexiness because of his TRL hosting job. He must be destroyed.
We suspect Benji Madden will be lurking around Hot Topics and Mtv studios. And if you see this Benji Madden, bring him to the closest psychiatric facility immediately. Also bring him to my house for an arse whooping. But be careful, for he is hungry and dangerous!