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We like to think of ourselves as professionals. [kevin : drums] photo gallery [jim : guitar/vox] photo gallery [dan : vocals] photo gallery [greg : guitar] photo gallery [bemis : bass] photo gallery   So the story of everyone’s favorite hard-rocking Springfield high school kids is not a short one. It all started back in an eighth grade classroom on Plainfield Street, where a shy young lad named Dan Sullivan and a boisterous youth by the name of Kevin Duquette decided it would be kinda cool to be in a band, and make lots of noise and piss off Kevin’s welfare-abusing neighbors. The only problem was, neither of us played instruments. So after spending the summer talking about it, come freshman year and high school starting, we decided to get serious (well, sort of). After pawning off a really shitty drum set for 75 bucks that looked really cool to us because it was a drum set, we decided to find ourselves people who actually did play instruments. This was a slow and unsuccessful process, which included a “DJ” who showed up to practice only once (and without his turntables), and a bass player who bought his first bass on the way to practice. We also had a guitarist who didn’t know what a power chord was. Just when we were beginning to give up hope, along came James Francis LaTaille II. This strapping young fellow, in search of a band, actually asked US if HE could be in OUR band. We laughed at first, until we realized that he was serious. Someone who actually knew how to play guitar wanted to be in our band. This was damn cool. So Kevin slowly but surely learned how to play his drums. It took him quite a while, and he still hasn’t quite got it... but he’s getting there. Anyway, our bass player at the time quit, because he was having a real hard time with his dad, who was this complete religious fanatic (who would later inspire the “Psychotic Jehovah” comic strip). Suddenly in search of a bass player, and having no success in finding one, I took one for the team and put countless hours into trying to learn how to play bass. I never quite figured it out, but I worked it well enough that I could keep a steady rhythm and sing at the same time, and I did so within a couple of months. We also added in another guitarist that I met at some party, but he would later prove to not really do much. But it was enough, for the time being, anyway. Going under the name Blitz 23, and making some really crappy (but in time) songs, we finally decided we needed a show. So we hooked up some really messy looking stage in Kevin’s backyard, and invited all our friends over. We played with our friends in Skarred Shrub, and sucked with a passion that you only see in bad CineMax porn. We decided we’d be better off without our other guitarist, and that practice would be easier to organize with just three of us. Kevin was supposed to tell him, but unfortunately, he found out through our website first, because Kevin is/was, basically, a lazy piece of shit, and never told him he was out of the band. We didn’t have any shows for a long time, however, because Kevin and Jim were playing hockey and when we did have time to practice, Jim would make up reasons why we couldn’t. Somewhere amidst it all, we decided to change our name, because we all hated “Blitz 23,” so we settled for the equally gay “Sixth Finger,” an homage to the infamous Six-fingered Man of The Princess Bride, a classic from every kid’s childhood. There wasn’t a lot of interest left. That winter, we had a big show planned on January sixth, with some of the biggest local bands around. Jim almost quit the band beforehand and we barely managed to squeak in and play three songs, all of which we slaughtered brutally. But the show itself was quite possibly the best local show I was ever privileged enough to bear witness to. Jim kind of unofficially quit the band after that, and me and Kevin kind of called it quits as well. He and I started a band called Fat Chance, with our friend Matt from Skarred Shrub, a trombone player, an trumpet player, and a bass player by the name of Dan Gibbs (who we would much later recruit for Sixfinger). This was all fun, and we weren’t half bad, but Matt worked crazy hours at Walgreens, and our trumpet and trombone players seldom showed up for practice. This band was falling apart that April as I attended a sweet sixteen party for my friend Steph, who was/is Jim’s girlfriend. I hung out with Jim for most of the night, and we decided to hang out and have a Sixth Finger practice the next day, just for fun. The next day, after screwing around and making up stuff way better than we did before, we talked it all over, and got on the same page with what we wanted to play and what we were looking at doing. Within a month, we had new songs and were playing shows again. The levels of improvement we made between April and the end of August were big. We recorded a cheap four song demo (“Do You Have Duct Tape?”) in May, and then did a follow-up CDEP, “Three Idiots Selling Furniture” in August, but this was mainly a rehash of old material, plus only one real new song. Either way, we were tighter, a little more solid, more comfortable onstage, and, more importantly, better friends. September came, and a bunch of Middle Eastern bastards hijacked some planes and killed a shitload of people. Kevin’s cousin, the good patriotic guy that he is, decided to throw a benefit show in the parking lot of our local funeral home. Ironic choice? Maybe, but it was damn cool. We all rocked the place, and we hung out with our friends in Scattered and the awesome guys in I Am Disaster. Hockey season stung our practice time again this time around, and although we kept getting booked for shows, they’d either get cancelled or we’d suddenly be unable to play them. Anyway, come January, we finally got back in the Monson Teen Center (we had played there the previous May, and sucked hard). This was our chance to clear our name. Following a Nirvana sound-a-like and a cover band, kids began asking us things like, “Please tell me you guys are a punk band,” as we unloaded our stuff. You know we hate labeling our stuff, but at that point, we were happy to oblige. A few kids actually were singing along. I was amazed. It was an awesome show. We began to play out more often from that point on, and eventually realized that we were at a point where we needed an extra guitar to balance out the rhythm section. We put a good amount of research into trying to find a second guitar player, and we were getting ready to give up when I remembered Greg Deane, this kid I met at a show who knew our first bassist from Blitz 23 (I had met him while I was in Fat Chance, and he instantly remembered me as “the ‘Fat Chicks’ guy”). So we got Greg over to play around with us, and he decided to join. This helped our sound a lot, it sounded a lot more full than it had. We played more and more shows, and one day, we decided to go the extra mile, and get a more solid bassist. This would make the songs tighter, but also would free me up to be able to sing without restriction, and encourage crowd participation. We needed to look no further than Dan "Bemis" Gibbs, who had played bass for Fat Chance, and was probably the most dedicated member of that band as well. Currently, we have just gotten out of the studio from recording a new CDEP, “East Side All Stars Play Hard,” with all new songs and better production. This should be out around mid April.