Let me just say right off that I don't understand girls. I mean, there are some girls that I totally get, that are just open with everyone and act just as they truly are. Then there are girls who act differently than they really are. They'll do flirtatious things with a guy, then wonder why that guy thinks she likes him. Then there are girls who do things just for attention. This could be anything from getting drunk and dancing on a table to being sober and laying a guy. Finally, there are girls who are just into that shit. Now, the first and last groups I have no real problem with, because they are being who they are. The third group I think is ridiculous, but the second group is the one I'm having trouble with right now.
Now, mind you, neither my roommate nor I knew this girl before a few days ago. She would occasionally send my roommate IMs, and with her flirtatious nature, managed to unwittingly convince the both of us that she liked him. I mean, an unknown sending you pictures over AIM is not something that happens to us every day. Hell, I don't even send pictures to people I've known online for a while. Actually, I've never IMed my picture to anyone.
So, needless to say, we got the wrong message from this girl. Then, when she finally meets my roommate, she still seems flirtatious, though it doesn't really look like she likes him. But the next day, she IMs him again, saying she has a surprise for him. When asked, she wouldn't say what it was she had for him. So my roommate sent me to her place, and she doesn't give me whatever it was. Then she presses my roommate all the more. Now, I ask all you guys out there, what do you think of the situation? What kind of girl has a surprise for a guy the day after she meets him?
Today we find out that what she had was a box of Tic-Tacs, because she apparantly ate all of ours the other night, and she blames this entire misunderstanding on us. But what are we to think? We are men, my roommate being one that is incredibly devoted to his girlfriend, and who did not want to go over to this unknown girl's room just to reject her. So because we care, we get chewed out. What the hell is wrong with this picture? Why does none of the blame fall on this girl who was being so very flirtatious? After all, we only thought what any guy would think. We should have taken to heart what Jack Nicholson said in "As Good As It Gets". When asked how he writes women so well, Melvin Udall (for those of you who missed this wonderful movie, Jack Nicholson) replies, "Easy. I think of a man, and I take away reason and accountability."
Apparantly it is now against the law to be a man. So, guys, if we want to make it in this new world, where the woman is getting better and better treatment, we are going to have to all shed our testicles, the very essence of our beings, and be more like them. If we want to keep our manhood, we have to find some way of taking our women down a peg or two. The best idea I have for this is to get some serious mass clit action going. This will put all women in our power. Well, all the women in the final group at least.
Until next time,
Goose
©2003 by Goose
