Here's a question from the skankanator, Jessica: on 10/24/01

    Okay, so I'm walking down the street, I look down and BAM! I have no pants! Is there such a way to prevent this, and if there is, how can I do so???

    I hear ya sister. About 1 in 10 people this year will lose their pants like that. Also an interesting side note 1 in 10 people are complete idiots. The answer is simple my friend and that answer is "Duct Tape." Ohhh... the miracle that is duct tape! And the thing about duct tape is you can never have enough! So basically duct tape those frisky pants down... way down. About 3 layers should do. And remember zippers and buttons are just other words for "ways for the pants gremlins to steal your pants." That's a rough translation though. Once you've taped down your pants, you won't have to worry about your pants. In fact you won't have to worry about them ever! The way I see it every time you take off your pants it just raises the chance that your pants will be misplaced/stolen. So just keep them on! Hey, it works for me. And to keep down the smell a handful of potpurri stuffed in my underoos keeps me good.