"Midnight Boogie"
Thanks for the memories Roman...and may you have a speedy recovery!!
Hustler...I hustle more than Jerry Flint..Reporters ask me questions like I give a shit...Midnight Felon's match with me is gonna be quick...If I don't get the 1-2-3 then I'm gonna be sick..
Dammit...Is what I'll yell when I throw a fit...But I got class son...i'm not gonna quit...Urge is a prime example of a punk kid..who tried to take the eazy rout in this hard biz...
To win...man....you'll have to lose son..and when you lose...well I don't know man ..ask Dragon...Oops my bad i didn't mean to call him out...He's just another jobber waiting his turn to fall out...Just like darkfalls..all the hype and one big copout! Yeah i said it bitch now shut up and watch your mouth...
Why do i sound so bold? Because I'm the baddest son!! You can shoot me five times and trust me...I'll catch every one..Swiftly as Neo as if I was in the Matrix...Oops for a sec..I gotta page this bitch...Damn Infidelity why don't you stop calling me!!! I used three condoms and plus i had a bisectomy!!!
Word of advice you should always wrap it twice...cause then you'd be walking around with mistakes for life..thats why I ask forgiveness from Christ..Cause I know without him I'd be a living to die..
Just ask Midnight Felon he wasn't supposed to be born...I f*cked his mom after she cooked me steak dijon....It was a blind date and boy do I wish I was blind...cause after a few beers my head felt as light as a dime...So then whispered in my ear and she seduced me with another one of her lines...I knew it was over kid cause all I heard was "Come on Jawbone, Hit Me baby One more Time...!"
(( Excerpt from "I'm not gellin but my son is Midnight Felon" by Jawbone Track #13 off of his new CD...Jawbone presents JAWbroni Inc.))
He just hopped out of the bathroom after taking a much needed bath with extra bubbles cause he likes them...He grabs his gear and freshens up by putting on some Cool Shit Cologne....true of course!***
***After Freshening up Jawbone put on his bunny slippers and hops onto the couch and grabs the remote for his Digital Cable...He doesn't believe in that Satelite sh*t cause they charge extra for local channels...Bitch asses...***
***Anyways...Jawbone is now in the process called Channel surfing since he has 3984 thousand channels..yep that's right 3984 thousand channels!! Cause 60 of them are spanish and he gotta send some love to the spanish community...but anyway...He can't find a damn thing on TV and with all these channels he could spend all day surfing....So he decided to press the menu button and highlights and selects...Movie Classics...and much to Jawbone's surprise is the name Saturday Night Fever 2!!***
Saturday Night Fever 2!!?? What the f*ck??? I never thought they'd come out with a sequel to this movie!!! John Travolta used to be and still is the shit!!! I wonder what cat they have playing the leading role...
***Jawbone scrolls through the Information button and he is dissappointed cause all it reads is "Saturday Night Fever 2 (1986) 2hrs and 10 mins to air in 45 minutes"
***She is soo soo fine :-D ***
***Five minutes elapsed and Jawbone is all freshened up with the pizza arriving about 2 minutes before the movie starts...Giving him time to get some glasses w/ ice and a some Sprite out the fridge...***
To Jawbone's surprise come in Bonnie!!!
I don't really know why I came over but the fact that you invited me for pizza and a movie..I'd thought it was a generous offer on your part...
Ah come on now...Didn't you know that Shivlry and manners was my middle name...along with being a smart ass!!
Well I guess you have to be that way to reporters...To keep yourself strong..
You know I'm not gonna comment anymore about that...Let's just sit hear and anticipate a good movie that i've been waiting to watch for 45 minutes...by the way..you want a blanket or something to cuddle with?
Yeah it's a bit nippy in here! Do you mind?
Not at all...anything for you..since you are so beautiful...
***Bonnie doesn't reply she just blushes and smiles back cause she knows that Jawbone's game is tighter than the screws and bolts on a F-16 jet!!***
***Credits rolls and it gets to the scene before the title where they introduce the stars or the movie...and then it plays...***
I'll be damn...I can't believe it!!! Midnight Felon is a "B" movie actor...Not only that..but he's John Travolta's replacement!!! Man When did this bitch come out again!!!
***Bonnie press the info button off of the remote like she's been to Jawbone's place before...which she has by the way...Don't hate!!! ***
Forget it..just set remote down and lets enjoy this movie...
***20 mins or so goes by as the two are just sitting back and enjoying cheap ass dialogue as well as quality choreography...But nothing is more funnier than watching Midnight Felon "cutting up the dance floor!"***
For a wrestler Midnight Felon is a pretty decent actor as well as a good dancer...wouldn't you agree?
Yeah I do...Man I can't believe that Felon is up in this biach like Ryan Vierra's World Title Push but the funny thing about that is how long is that going to last...hahahha
You know speaking of Title shots...it's a shame that you missed out on your chance for a classic match against Total...He's been the NEW World Champion for a long time!!!
I know what you mean..I was kicking myself this whole weekend...But i felt that what i did was worth it...because it was out of selflessness...That's the kind of decisions I make...I make them with my heart and not with my ego...
Aww...that is soo sweet Jawbone!
Just call me Jay, bonnie....
***Yeah it was like that...***
Man I can't believe I just did that...I don't know what came over me...
Me neither...it must be the Cool Shit Cologne!!...that sh*t is the sh*t!!!
Ooh baby..it is...Do you have one of those options with your digital cable that pauses the show while it's playing...huh? Cause I believe we should "pause" the movie for a few...
***Jawbone looks at the camera...kisses his bottle of Cool Shit Cologne and pauses the movie in the middle of Midnight Felon's argument with one of the disco studio manangers...***
***Midnight Felon for the Lifetime Achievement Award as a "B" movie actor!!!***
Aw come on Jay...i was just getting "warm"...
Can this wait..i mean come on..you already have this movie paused...And you don't know what this means to me to make out with a superstar like yourself..
Oh Bonnie I would love to get this party started but i'm so into this movie...It's just too damn funny...and besides...this is my opponent for this week's Bloodzone!!!
My schedule is too hectic right now not to focus on my oppenent...Otherwise I'd break out some of Shadojoker's Cool Whip and the strawberries too...and if you wait...I'll make the rest of your night worthwhile...
Well alright...i'll push play...
***After a while Bonnie starts getting into the movie too and both go back and forth about why they like this movie which still has about 2 and a half hours left...***
Man the plot of this movie is actually pretty damn good...
I mean..it starts off as Midnight Felon as a down-on-his-luck wrestler from a defunct fed called the UWF2...I've heard of a place like that...hmmm..anyways..
He just broke up with girlfriend Totalicious...and now he relieves himself of his problems by competing on Saturday Night Disco contests...
Yeah and the amazing thing about it is that in this movie he's actually gonna hook up with a real girl...
Exactly...just because you walk around with your lil bitch...((Meaning You Total!!!))...Doesn't mean you have a girlfriend...
That brings me to my part of the promo which i like best...The Punk out session...
Punk out Sessions?? Huh???
Well Bonnie...During these next two and very few "paragraphs" I will talk about my oppenent in a very respecting or disrespecting way...
I will try to keep it straight to the point unlike RIP Mr. Marathon Damien Casanova..Boy was that guy a total handjob or what!!
That last comment was so unappropriate..it totally ruined the mood!
What...cause I said Handjob??? Bitch please!!!
See Jay...there you go again...calling me a bitch! Haven't you caught on by now that I hate it when you use that word...yet alone call me a bitch! It hurts my feelings and makes me feel disrespected...
How am I supposed to like somebody...yet alone love a man who is disrespectful to me?? How Jay...do you know how?
Oh Bonnie...I'm so sorry...I really didn't mean to hurt your feelings...You are so special to me and it has taken me 45 minutes to realize that...
With that being said...Can we just finish the movie and afterwards...allow me to "Make up" for being mean...hehehehe
Well alright....Hold for a sec..
***Just as random as a Jawbone post...Bonnie farted!!!***
Excuse me...must have been a burrito I ate??
Damn right your excuse!! You know how disgusting that is?? Aww man..Women farts reeks!!! cause they smell soo sweet and stink so bad...Jeez....Oh f*ck..oh sh*t...oh..
***Jawbone pauses the movie and gets up to gets some Febreeze....and sprays it around like Bonnie just drops thirty pounds of methane (gas) in his pad...***
Now is that necessary?? How can you get on my case about farting when it is as natural to me...as it is for you??? Why don't you grow up?? And besides..i said excuse me!!
Ah Bonnie don't get so defensive...I hope you knew I was playing the hold time...I can care less if a women or not...Hell I can care less if you burp too!!! A lady who i would be around with would have to be real with me and not so damn self-conscious...
and besides...you think i'd be stupid to let a girl like you pass me by...If I can't have you...I don't know what I would do...besides date around for another year or two till i found your twin sister or something...
Aw Jay...you really have a way with words...
***Kisses Jawbone***
Now can you press play while we watch the rest of the movie...
No problem hun...
***The two sit closely together cuddling as a simple "B" movie classic straight from the vault has now turned from a simple tuesday night movie...to "OUR First Movie" in the eyes of Jawbone and Bonnie...***
The only thing i'm worried about right now Bonnie...is one thing...
What is that Jay?? What else could be on your mind right now??
Man a night like this is definitely rare...cause when I'm getting girls the same night Midnight Felon is pulling them on the dance floor then..Today must be a good day!! I just hope nothing stupid comes up to ruin this moment...
Oh believe me Jay...nothing will...
***Bonnie takes off her tank top and her sports bra while Jawbone jumps on top of her faster than a Ryan Vierra Superkick....He doesn't care about the rest of the movie now...He know that he's getting some and Felon's getting some too...So it really doesn't matter...That is why he's leaving the movie playing***
***Fades to black***
