Now then, boys, the kettle is warm, the tea hot, and our palidin set for battle. His name, in case you've forgotten already, is Kerr. He comes from this town of Rumptlesfjord to perform a quest of my own liking. He is strong of arm, brave of heart, solid of mind, and kind of spirit. But not too kind, mind you.
Here's your tea, Denby, and yours, Havelock. Now settle in and do be careful not to spill, won't you? Freya doesn't much enjoy being doused in scalding hot peppermint tea. Not that I've tried it before, mind, but, oh! you know!
Don't laugh too hard there, Denby. You'll spill. That's better. Now, back to Kerr, palidin extrodinaire!
Kerr was a man of great bravery. He had ousted many opponents in competition here in Rumptlesfjord in the olden days of yore. He enjoyed archery, and swordsmanship, and quilting with his grandmother.
Nay! Not quilting! That's a woman's duty!
You think so, Denby? Do you agree, Havelock?
Aye.
Too bad. He's a quilter. It's my story. If you don't like it, you can go out into the blizzard. Where was I? Ah, yes. Quilting...
He could quilt the most marvelous blankets, and many a person would love to have them. However, he never sold them. Nay. Instead, he gave them away to all the poor people. The nobility never received any of his work, which was probably for the best. We all know how the nobility tends to rid themselves of things that are no longer useful.
However, Kerr wanted very much to be a noble. That way, he could be called "good Lord Kerr" or "good King Kerr" or "good Earl Kerr of Rumptlesfjord" and the like. He didn't rightly care which title he received. That wasn't important. He could become a knight for all he cared, so long as he was recognized.
Actually, he didn't care if he was recognized by the masses at all, so long as one particular woman noticed him.
All this for a girl!?
Yes, now stop interrupting.
Kerr tried his hardest to woo her, but she was a daughter of a local noble. She didn't care if he was strong of arm, brave of heart, solid of mind, and kind of heart, but not too kind. No. All she cared was that her husband would have money and status. That way, she would not have to cook or sew or sweep or bare many children to do the work for her. Her name was ... was...
Gro!
No, that's too ungainly. Kai.
How about Idony?
Yes, Idony is good.
Yes. Good.
Her name was Idony and she was beautiful in all manners save her soul. Her soul was ugly because she was greedy and desired only wealth. Kerr, however, did not see this, for only a special few can see the true likeness of another's soul. However, Idony was so shallow that all save those who fell in love with her saw her for her true form.
Kerr had tried many-a-times to get her to notice him, but no matter what he did, she would walk passed him as if he were part of the scenery. It did not break poor naïve Kerr's heart, though, no matter how many times she did it. Finally, he decided the best way to talk to her and make her notice him was to stand directly between her and her horse. The next day she went to market with her father's kitchen wenches, he did just that.
'What are you doing in my way, peasant?' she demanded of him.
'I'm not a peasant,' Kerr protested. 'I am Kerr the Quilter. I've been called strong in the arm, brave in the heart, solid in the mind, and kind in the spirit, but not too kind, mind you.' He beamed with pride as he related this.
'That's all well and good, but you're still a peasant and a confused one at that. Housewives are quilters, not men. Men pursue trades. Quilting is not a trade.'
'It most certainly is. I trade my quilts for the happiness of the people.'
This guy's no palidin!
Just because he's cast no spells and slain no dragons does not mean that he is not a palidin.
He's pretty weak. Just because he says that he is strong in the arm doesn't mean that he is. We want blood!
And feats of strength!
You'll get that soon enough. For now, though, drink your dratted tea. It's getting on towards evening and there's naught to do save sleep and spin tales when a blizzard comes. If I have to stop telling this story to get you two to stop interrupting and sleep, I most certainly shall.
No!
Not that, miss Astrid!
Well, then you had best both keep quiet and settle down. You'll get your magic and blood soon enough.
'I trade my quilts for the happiness of the people,' Kerr countered. He reached into his pouch and produced a blanket that seemed to have been sewn of the very fabrics of the sun itself. It depicted the fire through which Sigurd had rode to Brynhild to win her hand in marriage. However, Idony would have none of it.
'What of it? My own spinstresses can stitch me a quilt just like it, and it would only bring me happiness because it would keep me warm. It is not beautiful, for the only thing in this dratted world that is beautiful is I.' She pushed the quilt away. It flew from Kerr's hands and landed in the streets nearby.
'You are, definitely, the most beautiful,' Kerr remarked. 'But,' he added, just as he saw her begin to become charmed, 'there are other things that are beautiful as well. The sun's gold, for instance, and the moon's silver. Both are of beauty beyond remark.'
'So you say, peasant,' Idony shot back. 'I have never seen the gold of the sun and the silver of the moon with mine own eyes. Perhaps you have some onhand to which you may show me?'
'Alas!' Kerr muttered. 'I have none, dear lady. You see, the sun's gold and the moon's silver are only capable of being reached at sunset and sunrise, when both orbs are hanging on the edge of the world.'
'Well, then, I suppose you should get you gone and search for it, shan't you. I shall not believe you until you bring me sufficiant proof that these two precious ingots do exist,' Idony replied coldly.
'That I shall, dear lady! For you, I shall seek out these ores of metal and to you I shall present them!' Kerr cried merrily. He had hope, now.
'Get you gone, peasant!' Idony isisted. 'I grow sick of your company!' She then shoved Kerr out of her way and mounted her horse. She stuck her nose into the air and trampled the beauteous quilt that Kerr had taken his time to craft.
Asleep already, boys? Well, that's well and good. I'll continue this at a later date for when you both shall enjoy it. Now, however, the moon is nearing her appex. I shall slumber, I suppose, until the crowing of the cock and the heralding of the dawn. 'Til then, I must get me to bed. Goodnight, Freya. The babe and I shall sleep quite sound upon this old rocker, thank you very much.
Background by Julianne's Background Textures.