I Am Not Amused by Lady Leonie This story is a work of pure fanfiction and in no way infringes on the patents or copyrights of Renaissance pictures or Studio's USA. This is the continuation of the story line started in "Just Rewards". Characters: Ares/Gabrielle/Evander/Aphrodite Rating: PG13 Feedback: ladyleonie@yahoo.com Ares felt like a utter fool, hiding behind trees and bushes was not his style. Unfortunately, it was necessary to keep Gabrielle and Evander from noticing him. He wished he had his powers back. It would make this spying business sooo much easier. The sound of laughter caught his ear and he growled under his breath. She was laughing again. Only a few days ago she was weeping her eyes out and now here she was, with his son the rogue, having a gay old time. The idea that someone besided himself was bringing her such joy was unnerving. He should be the one with his hand on her knee as they shared a jest. Not his insolent son. The boy was too charming for his own good. That bastard Hercules showed himself in every word, every movement the boy made. If he had raised him, WELL, things would be different. The tinkling sound of her laughter was almost too much for him to bare. The scent of roses on the breeze announced Aphrodite's arrival. "Whatcha doin bro?" AAAAW, never mind. I see exactly what you are doing. Spying on my friend and OH, OH my goodness! Is that Evander with Gabrielle?" "Would you keep it down! I don't want them to know I'm here, YET. You know my strategy. Know thy enemy before the attack." "Your enemy? Are that is your son you are talking about! Why, he is almost the spitting image of you. No wonder she finds him so attractive." "Sis, you don't know how close you are coming to feeling my hands around your throat! Of course, I know he is my son, but I also know what I would be thinking in his shoes. I'm here to make sure thinking is all he does, where Gabrielle is concerned." Aphrodites laugh was cut short by the thunderous look on Ares face. "Chill bro, or I won’t tell you what I found out." She could see the duo ahead had his full attention. "It's about Gabby's little sissster!" she sang. This got Ares attention. If Dite knew where Lila was, it would be just the excuse he needed to break in on the laughing couples party."So spill it! Where is Lila?" "I'm not so sure I'm going to tell you. After all you just threatened to strangle me a few minutes ago. Nope, I think I will give this message to Gabby myself." With a sly wink Aphrodite vanished. "GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! Alright, sis. I'm sorry! I'm very sorry for threatening you. Could you please come back now and tell me where Lila is." The words barely made it past his gritted teeth, but apparently Dite had been waiting for just such a reaction and appeared instantly. "Since your apology was sooo sincere," she says sarcastically. "I will tell you."Aphrodite whispered Lila's location in Ares ear and chuckled when he let out a growl."Of all the villages in Greece, she had to choose that one. As if this wasn't hard enough. NowI will have HER to deal with." Ares dismissed Dite with a flip of his hand and stalked off into the woods toward Gabrielle and Evander."Humph, of all the nerve! I should, should, I should turn him into a toad." After thinking of what lay ahead for her brother and his courtship of the fair bard, she decided he would suffer enough. Gabrielle and Evander both jumped to their feet when Ares entered the clearing. "Stand back, Gabrielle! I'll protect you from this foul villain!" Gabrielle started to laugh, but was brought up short at the striking resemblance between the two men. Suddenly it hit her where she knew Evander from. He was Ares son. Hercules had told her and Xena all about him and how Ares had kidnapped him as a baby. She looked from Ares to Evander and realized that although, Ares definitely recognised his son. Evan did not know who he was. This was going to be interesting. "Don't worry about me Evan, I can defend myself!" "Very well, I might say" Ares added "So, you two know each other? Well any friend of Gabby's is a friend of mine. Glad to meet you eeer.. I didn't catch YOUR name." "That's because I didn't throw it." Gabrielle could see tension pop between the two and knew that Ares didn't want Evan knowing who he was. She decided to help Ares out, for the time being. At least until she found out what his new game was."Evander, this is my sarcastic friend uuumm...Porkus!" Gabrielle nearly burst trying to control the laughter bubbling inside, because of the look on his face. "Yes, Evander, that is my name PORKUS! I have some news for Gabrielle that I need to deliver. In PRIVATE!!" With that said Ares took Gabrielle off to the nearby woods. As soon as they were out of Evander's sight he turned the snickering bard around to face him and saw the absolute joy on her face. That look nearly took all the steam out of his anger, but not all. "Porkus..Porkus, for the god's sake! Couldn’t you have come up with something better then that? Something more fitting like Studlious or Cockrum. No forget that last one, but with your bardmind, all you could come up with was Porkus?" Gabrielle had to lean against Ares to hold herself up, since she was laughing so hard. The single touch of her hand on his bare chest sent the last of his anger up in smoke. In its place another fire was kindling. He did have the blonde beauty all to himself for the moment. "Why not?" he growled as he pulled her flush against his chest. Gabrielle was quickly sobered by his actions and started to pull away. The tight hold on her arms, turned into a gentle caress as his hand ran down her back. Gabrielle could not break the hold Ares had on her, even thou he was no longer actually holding her. He held her completely with his eyes and the intense feelings his exploring hands were arousing. She did not recognize the moans as her own when his hands began to kneed the flesh of below her leather skirt. When Ares finally claimed her mouth with his own, all logical thoughts fled, leaving only a burning need. She couldn't get close enough to Ares, even thou there was not a scant inch of space between them. Gabrielle felt her feet rising off the ground as Ares picked her up into his arms. With his strong arms to hold her, they were now at eye level with each other and Gabrielle saw the fire burning in the dark depths of Ares eyes. She entertwined her fingers in the hair at the base of his neck to pull him deeper into her mouth. Their tongues doing a intimate dance as old as time. "I hope I'm not interrupting, but there seems to be a problem here." Evander tried to look away before they saw how disturbed he was, by what he saw. He could hear the two straightening their clothes and Porkus was grumbling something about "insolent whelps". He could not hear the rest, but assumed the man was not happy he had interrupted. The trio walked silently back to the clearing and Evander heard Porkus and Gabrielle gasp. In the middle of the field were three woman. "It seems the Fates, have decided to come to you, Gabrielle" Ares whispered. Gabrielle nearly broke into a run in her haste to get the woman. They could tell her about Lila and her excitement was palatable. The oldest of the Fates stepped forward. "You were in search of us, Gabrielle?" "Yes, I was. I come looking for answers to the fate of my sister Lila. I need to know if she is alive and if so, where can I find her. She is all I have left of my family." "Come child! You two, stay where you are. Gabrielle will tell what we have said in her own time." Ares and Evan stood back and watched in silence as the Fates quietly answered all of Gabrielle's questions. Ares noticed Evander looking at him strangely and asked "Can I help you with something!" "I was just wondering if you noticed that we seem to bare a resemblance to each other. Are you related to my mother somehow? Her name is Nemesis." "Well actually, I am related to you. I'm your..." "Evan..Porkus, let's go! I know where my sister is and you two are wasting precious daylight."Gabrielle looked back at the two men, apparently in the middle of some conversation. "Well, I guess, I'm going alone. Good bye Evan..PORKUS." The two men watched as she mounted her horse and took off threw the woods. "Well I"ll be damned. She left me!" "Left you maybe, but, I'll catch up with her soon enough. Until we meet again..Porkus." Evander had mounted his own horse and was in hot pursuit of Gabrielle. "Damn..damn..damn..I CANNOT believe this. I AM ARES GOD OF WA...oh forget it. Dite!!!!" "You rang?"Aphrodite appeared in her usual puff of pink smoke. "What do you want now, Ares? Being the only major god left on Olympus is terribly time consuming. I have cupid whining about his arrow going limp and Apollo is turning into a total pain. This is all seriously crushing my groove." "I have more important things to worry about then your groove, sis! The whelp of mine is alone with Gabrielle on the way to Amphipolis to find her sister. The three old bitty's over there told her before I could and I got left here with my ass in the dust!" Aphrodite turned to see the Fates disappearing into the mist around the woods. "I thought you were gonna tell her that her sister was with Xena's mother. What happened?" "I got ..distracted is what happened! Are you going to help me out or what?" "With that attitude mister, you can just walk!" For the second time that day he found himself apologizing to his ditzy sister. Finally appeased Aphrodite took Ares hand and dropped him off. Right into a steaming pile of horse dropping's! "OOPSY! My bad! No, don't give me that murderous look of yours Ares. Your here aren't you?It will be a few hours before Gabrielle arrives. That's plenty of time to get cleaned up. I'm outee!" "Well, I can't seeing this getting any worse" Ares grumbled as he wiped the mess from his leather pants. "I wouldn't be so sure about that!!" Ares looked up into the face of a very angry warrior princess. On To Part 4 - Amphipolis Now