Strange Bedfellows
Written By: Tom Fontana
Directed By: Alan Taylor
Original Airdate: August 17, 1998
Transcribed: February 22, 2000. Last Revised: February 22, 2000.

Oz is the property of Tom Fontana, Barry Levinson, Rysher Entertainment, and HBO. This page is not authorized by any of the above. Absolutely no copyright infringement is intended and no profit is being made from this page.

(Hill narrating.)

Hill: "You made your bed, now lie in it." Anybody wanna tell me what the fuck that means? You're gonna go to the trouble of making up your bed, smoothing out the sheets, fluffing up the pillows, just to ruin it all by lying down. The phrase should be, "You laid in you bed, now make it." Point being, you got to be responsible for your actions. Responsible.

(In the cafeteria.)

Arif: Kareem, you know we never doubt your wisdom.

Mack: You're the boss.

Arif: Why are you talking to that Nazi?

Mack: That nigger?

Said: Like it or not, that man is a child of God. Now, I have made a commitment to Allah to defend the rights of all prisoners inside of Oz, not just the ones of color. Not just the ones who believe what we believe or who pray as we pray.

Schillinger: That nigger's gonna get me out of here.

(In Glynn's office.)

Glynn: Said is representing Vern Schillinger?

McManus: Didn't Nostradamus predict this? Doesn't this mean we're two steps closer to the end of the fucking world?

Glynn: You faced Said during Hill's hearing, didn't you, Pat?

Fortunato: Yeah, and I won, but this is going to be a jury trial. Said's a powerful speaker. He could move those jurors.

Wittlesey: So what happens next?

Fortunato: You and Tim will have to give another deposition.

Wittlesey: Great.

Fortunato: He'll want to know how you set up and trapped Schillinger and he's also going to bring up Scott Ross. So, be ready.

(In a hallway.)

McManus: That doesn't worry you, that we're gonna be questioned about Ross?

Wittlesey: No. Why should it?

McManus: Diane, the last time I was asked if I knew anything about the shooting, I said no.

Wittlesey: Yeah?

McManus: Well, this time I can't.

Wittlesey: Why not?

McManus: Because, now I know the truth.

Wittlesey: So?

McManus: I'll be under oath.

Wittlesey: So?

McManus: You want me to perjure myself?

Wittlesey: Tim, I want what you do (?)

McManus: I just...

Wittlesey: Look, can we just cut the shit? You are going to say you have a conscience, right? A moral code. Seepage in your cerebral cortex. Now, I am gonna say lie. If you love me, if you ever loved me, then lie.

(In a hearing room.)

Wittlesey: Schillinger approached me outside the library. He told me he would pay me to kill Beecher.

Said: And you agreed?

Wittlesey: Yes. In order to stop him.

Said: We have a tape recording of you and Vern Schillinger. This was your second conversation about Beecher.

Wittlesey: Yes.

Said: We don't have a recording of the first one. Isn't it true that that time you approached Schillinger?

Wittlesey: No.

Said: You never asked him how much he'd pay you to kill Tobias Beecher?

Wittlesey: No, that would be entrapment and against the law.

Said: You say he offered to pay you money. Did he offer you anything else?

Wittlesey: He implied that if I didn't help him, he would tell people I killed Scott Ross.

Said: Did that factor into your decision to trick him?

Wittlesey: No, 'cause it's not true. No matter what Schillinger says or thinks he saw, I killed no one.

(Later, in the hearing room.)

Said: So Officer Wittlesey is, in general, a trustworthy person?

McManus: Yes.

Said: She'd never lie to you.

McManus: I didn't say that.

Said: So she has lied to you? Did she lie to you regarding Vern Schillinger?

McManus: You mean him wanting to kill Beecher?

Said: Yes.

McManus: No.

Said: So she told you the absolute truth about her reasons for accepting his offer?

McManus: I assume so.

Said: You assume so?

McManus: Yes.

Said: So was one of those reasons the fact that Schillinger knew Wittlesey murdered Ross?

McManus: You mean, did she say to me that was one of her reasons?

Said: Yes.

McManus: No.

Said: McManus, did Wittlesey murder Ross?

McManus: Murder?

Said: Yes. To the best of your knowledge, did Diane Wittlesey shoot Scott Ross with the intention of ending his life?

McManus: No.

(In the library.)

Schillinger: Well?

Said: You don't have a case.

Schillinger: Will you turn that down?

Said: They have evidence, witnesses, and the tape recording.

Schillinger: Man, there's gotta be some legal loophole, some technicality.

Said: You will be convicted of conspiracy to commit murder and you will be sentenced to ten more years.

Schillinger: It might as well be life. I'll never see my kids. Come on, there's gotta be some way out. What about Wittlesey killing Ross?

Said: It's your word against theirs and without proof your word is meaningless.

Adebisi: They got you, baby.

Schillinger: Would you mind your own Goddamn business?

Said: Schillinger, I'm withdrawing from your case.

Schillinger: No, you are not. You pull out, that only compounds my guilt.

Said: I will not fight your lost battle.

Schillinger: You did this on purpose. Didn't you? You set me up. You agreed to be my lawyer knowing you were gonna pull out, knowing that would make things worse.

Said: Things couldn't be worse. I wasn't sure before but now I know, you are guilty. Truly guilty.

Schillinger: You used me.

Said: You used me. Life is balanced.

Schillinger: Fucking nigger.

Said: Salaam aleikuum.

Adebisi: You just lost the battle.

(Hill narrating.)

Hill: Billy Shakespeare, in his last will and testament, left his wife, Anne Hathaway, his quote, "second best bed." Now, Shakespeare had abandoned Anne and the kids years before and had only come back home to Stratford when his bones started to creak. Was the second best bed a joke between a husband and wife, or was it Shakespeare's ultimate fuck you?

(On Death Row.)

Bellinger: Hello. Did you need something?

Wittlesey: No.

Bellinger: I do. I need a friend.

Wittlesey: It ain't gonna be me.

Bellinger: Of course. I'm a convicted murderer. You're not.

Wittlesey: Let me ask you something. Do you sleep at night?

Bellinger: Yes.

Wittlesey: How is that possible, given what you did, that you sleep through the night?

Bellinger: When people ask me about my daughter's death, I tell 'em it was an accident. But it wasn't an accident. It was what had to happen. It was what had to be. And so I sleep. I sleep good.

D'Agnasti: Hey, Diane.

Wittlesey: Hey.

D'Agnasti: Here, Shirley.

Bellinger: Thanks, sweetie. (She finds a note under her sandwich and writes one in return.)

(In the kitchen. Bellinger's tray is returned and Adebisi retrieves the note.)

(In McManus' office.)

Burrano: Peter Schibetta was definitely poisoned. He's getting out of the hospital ward sometime today.

Glynn: Test results come back from the lab?

Burrano: Yeah. Same poison used to kill rats in the cafeteria was found in his digestive system.

Glynn: What'd he eat?

Burrano: He says immediately before he got sick he was eating a chocolate bar that had been given to him by Adebisi. Clearly Adebisi did it.

McManus: Why is it so clear? Anybody could have put the poison on the chocolate bar before Adebisi took it out of the box.

Burrano: Everybody knows that Adebisi has a problem with Schibetta.

McManus: A problem is circumstantial. Lotta people work in the kitchen, a lotta people hate Schibetta.

Glynn: All right, all right. Lenny, keep investigating. You get any solid evidence that Adebisi was involved, we'll deal with him.

Burrano: And if not?

Glynn: Then this one goes in the unsolved mysteries file.

(In the hospital.)

Burrano: Hey.

Schibetta: What do you want?

Burrano: To tell you that Glynn ain't doing dick about what happened.

Schibetta: That's fine. I'll take care of it myself.

Burrano: How?

Schibetta: What do you gotta say?

Burrano: Peter, the family is embarrassed.

Schibetta: They got no reason to be embarrassed.

Burrano: They're not happy with the way that you're running things in here.

Schibetta: They blame me for getting poisoned?

Burrano: Your father got fed ground glass over the course of months. Now, whoever did that, probably Adebisi, took the time because they knew that Nino was watching. Nino was smart.

Schibetta: And so because I got one quick shot of poison instead of ground glass, I'm not as good as Pop, right?

Burrano: This is what they say. The family.

Schibetta: Christ. You tell 'em I'm gonna handle Adebisi. I'm gonna get my honor back by the end of the day. Either that fucking moolie or me is gonna be in a bodybag.

(In Em City.)

Hill: Look at that Poet on TV.

Wangler: In a fucking tux.

Alvarez: Serious shit's going down, yo.

Ryan: Hey, Schibetta. Today's lunch special is arsenic.

Wittlesey: Knock it off, guys!

(In the kitchen.)

Wangler: What's our breakfast menu?

Adebisi: Omelet. Eggs.

Wangler: Yo, come into the freezer.

Adebisi: Morning, Chucky. You don't work here anymore, baby.

Pancamo: Wrong. I got a job to do.

Schibetta: Hi there, pal. (Schibetta and Pancamo attack Adebisi. Adebisi knocks them both out, then rapes Schibetta.)

(In the hospital.)

Burrano: Pancamo and Schibetta were found unconscious, Schibetta's rectum bleeding. Could've been raped.

Glynn: What do you mean could've?

Burrano: He says he doesn't know what happened. He won't talk about it.

Glynn: No, he knows. He's too ashamed to admit he took one up the ass. He won't talk, he'll just get even. I'm gonna fire the CO that let this happen.

Burrano: Peter. Peter. I just talked to the family. You're out. Somebody else is gonna be taking over operations here in Oz.

Schibetta: Lenny. Don't tell my father, ok?

Burrano: Huh?

Peter: Don't tell my father.

(In Em City.)

Alvarez: You shoulda been there, man. Pancamo, out for the count. Schibetta's eyes wide open. His mind is shit.

Guerra: He got raped. By who?

Alvarez: What's up, partner?

Adebisi: Partners, eh?

Alvarez: Yeah.

Adebisi: You and me. We're fucking partners. I said you could help me kill the dago. You didn't do shit.

Guerra: Yo, man, you always let him diss you, man. You afraid of him, ese?

Alvarez: Yo, fuck you. I ain't afraid of nobody, all right?

(In the cafeteria.)

Guerra: I'm gonna kill that motherfucker.

Alvarez: We can't. When we kill, we kill for a reason.

Guerra: I got a reason.

Alvarez: You got shit. It's your fucking fault. I know all about your fucking bullshit, man.

Guerra: Oh, yeah? So when do we go to war? What's it take, huh, Miguel?

(Hill narrating, with flashbacks of Hernandez' crime.)

Hill: Prisoner number 98H498, Raoul Hernandez, aka El Cid. Convicted July 10, '98, murder in the second degree. Sentence: 36 years. Up for parole in 20.

(At the inmates' entrance.)

Wittlesey: Raoul Hernandez, Miguel Alvarez.

Alvarez: El Cid, it's an honor, man.

Hernandez: You Latino?

Alvarez: Si.

Hernandez: They lied to you. You too fucking white to be a Latino. Get the fuck outta my face.

(Hill narrating.)

Hill: Rumor mill says, the President of the United States gets people to donate cash in return for spending the night in the Lincoln Bedroom. But Lincoln never slept in the Lincoln Bedroom. Lincoln never even slept in the bed that's in the Lincoln Bedroom. How dumb do you got to be to give hard or soft money for a decent place to crash and it's false advertising? Shit. Wanna pay to snooze in my room? Jeffrey Dahmer lived there, Al Capone too. Fuck, for a couple extra bucks, I'll get the ghost of Jesse fucking James to float on by.

(In Rebadow's and Busmalis' pod.)

Busmalis: Uh-oh.

Rebadow: What uh-oh?

Busmalis: Water pipe. I almost busted it open. Imagine the geyser of water spouting up out of the floor.

Rebadow: Busmalis, I'm beginning to have second thoughts about this excavation.

Busmalis: Second thoughts? Well, have third thoughts.

Rebadow: If we get caught...

Busmalis: We're not gonna get caught.

Rebadow: We have a hole the size of the Holland Tunnel in our cell. We're gonna get caught.

Busmalis: Shh, she'll hear you.

Rebadow: She? She who?

Busmalis: The hole. I treat every hole I dig like a lady. A very special lady. I never married, you know. I could never find a real woman who could satisfy me the way she does.

Rebadow: Yeah, I bet there are a lot of women who are broken-hearted at losing you.

(Hill narrating, with flashbacks of Walker's crime.)

Hill: Prisoner number 98W504, Jiggy Walker. Convicted July 12, '98, murder in the second degree. Sentence: 28 years. Up for parole in 20.

(In a hallway.)

Rebadow: What are you in for?

Walker: What's it matter? The charge is trumped. Truth is I'm here 'cause I know too much.

Rebadow: Too much about what?

Wittlesey: Rebadow will show you the ropes. Behave yourself, we'll get along fine.

Rebadow: Too much about what?

Walker: Governor Devlin.

Rebadow: What about Devlin?

Walker: A major league crack addict.

Rebadow: No, no.

Walker: Yeah. Yeah.

Rebadow: Crack addict? How would you know that he's a crack addict?

Walker: How do you think, bitch? I sold him the shit. I'm the Governor's drug dealer of choice.

(In Em City.)

Walker: Well, looky, looky. Four beautiful aces.

Keller: Wait a minute. I got a fucking ace.

Ryan: Cocksucker.

Walker: Hey, gentlemen, don't get testy now.

Said: Mr. Walker. Salaam aleikuum. May we talk privately, please? (Walking up the stairs.) I understand you have some information regarding the Governor, James Devlin? Information of a damaging nature.

Walker: Damaging? Depends on how you view crack.

Said: Well, my guess is the voters would frown on the chief executive doing street drugs. I want this information to go public.

Walker: I don't know, Said. What's in it for me?

Said: What's in it for you? If we create a tidal wave and we sweep Governor Devlin right out of office, you might find yourself released.

Walker: How?

Said: I have connections within the media. This time tomorrow morning, you might find yourself the most famous man in the state.

Walker: Slick. Me, a celebrity like Oprah.

Said: Oh, yes, my brother. But what I need from you is this: dates, times, places of your business transactions with Governor Devlin.

Walker: I can't be exact. It's not like we kept records and such.

Said: Are there any other witnesses to corroborate your story?

Walker: Scat'll do that.

Said: Who's Scat?

Walker: My cousin. Works the post office, priority mail division.

Said: OK. I'll make some calls. Be prepared to do a lot of interviews, my brother.

Walker: Bring 'em on, baby. I got plenty to say and plenty time to say it.

(In a conference room.)

McManus: You seen this?

Glynn: The moderating officers say Walker gave five phone interviews yesterday to the press across the state.

Burrano: Yeah, I saw it on the local news this morning.

Sister Pete: I heard it on the radio driving in.

Mukada: Devlin's finished.

Wittlesey: Assuming he actually bought the crack, yeah.

McManus: Come on, Diane. You're doubting he's guilty?

Wittlesey: He's innocent 'til proven otherwise, right?

Glynn: ABC, NBC, CNN, they all want on camera interviews.

McManus: Let 'em. Let 'em all talk to Walker, all day, every day 'til Devlin resigns.

Sister Pete: Come on, the Governor's not gonna give the media that kind of access.

Glynn: On the contrary. I just got off the phone with him. Devlin wants Walker to talk to the press. He wants full disclosure.

McManus: Well, I'll be fucked.

(In Em City, the inmates are watching the news.)

Devlin: ... no truth to these allegations. I do not know Jiggy Walker, I have never bought drugs from him or anyone, not now or ever. This is another in a long series of false, partisan accusations that have been perpetuated by a scandal-hungry press. I intend to go to Oswald today and confront Mr. Walker face to face. I invite the media to accompany me.

McManus: The monitoring office says you placed the calls to the newspapers for Walker.

Said: Is that a crime, McManus?

McManus: I hate Devlin as much as you do. I only wish you would have told me.

(In the cafeteria.)

Devlin: I have here the records of the two physical examinations performed on me since I came into office. Included in the report is the drug testing I instituted as mandatory for all state employees. There is no indication of any illegal chemical substances in my system. I say to you now, bring me Jiggy Walker. Bring me my accuser. Mr. Walker, you claim that you sold me two grams of crack cocaine on May 3 at an apartment house at Spring and Vine, near the state capitol.

Walker: That's right.

Devlin: I have here plane tickets and a guest list proving that, on May 3, I was attending a reception for the nation's governors in the Blue Room at the White House. Mr. Walker, how could I be in two places at the same time?

Walker: OK, so that night I sold the shit to one of your aides.

Devlin: Which one?

Walker: Sam Burlinghall.

Devlin: Sam Burlinghall was with me in DC.

Walker: Cat said he was Sam Burlinghall. How was I to know he was lying?

Devlin: How indeed. You claim your cousin, James Dyson Walker, will back up your story. I have here a sworn statement from James Dyson Walker denying any participation in any drug transactions between you and me.

Walker: OK, so you paid him off.

Devlin: No, Mr. Walker, I asked him to tell the truth and now I'm asking you. Admit you lied. Show's over, Mr. Walker. For once in your life, do the decent thing and admit it.

Walker: OK, I lied.

(In a classroom.)

Said: I don't understand why you'd lie.

Walker: Man, I been in and out of prison all my life. The one thing I've learned is that, when you come through them gates, you got to have props. You got to be somebody to get respect so the others don't fuck with you.

McManus: OK, but why go public?

Walker: It was his idea, making all sorts of noises about getting released. I figured it was worth a shot.

Said: How stupid. You must've known you'd be exposed.

Walker: I knew it was a good chance.

Said: Then you tell me why, brother.

Walker: Man, my first prison stay was over at Lardner. Eighteen years, I was seventeen. My family came to visit me regular and LaTanya, my fiancee, and my friends. They all came the first year. Then LaTanya married Beau, so she stopped coming, stopped showing up. Then Rodney didn't come no more, then my cousin Scat, my sister, my dad, he died. Year five, it was just me and my mama. Then they put her in an old folks' home. Six years in, I had no visiting days. I had no one come to see if I was still breathing. So I said, hey, get on TV, become a superstar, maybe they'd come for longer. Maybe they wouldn't forget about me. Fight the power, baby. Little hostile.

McManus: I'm transferring you to Gen Pop.

Walker: I hear that.

(In Glynn's office.)

Devlin: (On the phone.) Yes, yes, I know. It's shocking what some people will do. Thank you, Mr. President. (He hangs up.) All in all, it was a good day.

Glynn: You didn't set all this up, did you? You didn't hire Walker to lie, did you?

Devlin: No. No, I simply took advantage of the situation. I've been accused of so many things in the past year or so that when I realized I could actually prove my innocence on this one, well, it tinges all the other charges with a wonderful veneer of doubt. (Tosses a pack of cigarettes at Glynn.) Give these to Jiggy Walker. I owe him.

(In Solitary.)

Sister Pete: Giles was on the corner of Sycamore and Broome on the day my husband was killed. He saw whoever pushed Leonard off the back of that truck.

Glynn: But he won't say who it was.

Sister Pete: Aim.

Glynn: Aim?

Sister Pete: That's all he'll say now, over and over again. Aim.

Glynn: So what's next?

Sister Pete: I'm gonna talk to Augustus Hill. Before Em City opened, he was in Unit B in the cell right next to Giles'.

(In a hallway.)

Sister Pete: Before he got sent into Solitary, did Giles ever say anything about his life on the outside.

Hill: I guess so.

Sister Pete: What do you mean, you guess so?

Hill: I never really listened to what he was saying, you know. He'd just go on and on, about that, about this. I finally just tuned him o-u-t.

Sister Pete: What about two years ago when he killed his roommate Ron Bibi?

Hill: The day wasn't different than any other day.

Sister Pete: Ron Bibi was killed because he was trying to steal Giles' stuff. The files show the opposite.

Hill: I don't know about no files, but I remember William Giles was very conscientious about his teeth. The guy brushed like a thousand times a day. Seriously, he guarded his toothpaste like it was gold.

Sister Pete: His toothpaste?

Hill: Yep.

Sister Pete: Augustus, what brand did he use?

Hill: Brand? Oh, same as mine. Aim.

(In Solitary.)

Sister Pete: Ron Bibi killed my husband. Can you tell me about it?

Giles: Gingivitis bad. Bibi worse. Eyes. Eyes. Bibi eyes. Bibi.

Sister Pete: He saw you see him push Leonard off the truck? Do you know why Ron Bibi murdered my husband?

Giles: Sorry.

Sister Pete: He never said to you why he pushed my husband off that truck?

Giles: Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.

Sister Pete: Shh, it's ok. It's all right.

(In Glynn's office.)

Glynn: Giles murdered the man who murdered your husband. And now you want me to let him out of solitary?

Sister Pete: Yes.

Glynn: You ever consider the idea that maybe he's playing you? Maybe he made it all up?

Sister Pete: I believe him, Leo.

Glynn: Even if he did what he said he did, he's still prone to violence. He'd be a menace to the rest of the prison population.

Sister Pete: Well, still, I feel like I should do something special for him.

(In Solitary. A CO brings in a box.)

CO: From Sister Peter Marie. (Giles opens the box and it's filled with toothbrushes, toothpaste, and mouthwash.)

(In the hospital.)

Ryan: Hey, Dr. Ferstopnick, how you doing?

Ferstopnick: Oh, my backache's killing me, my house needs a new sewer system, my wife wants to spend our 30th wedding anniversary in the Virgin Islands. Talk about living in the past. Other than that, I'm hunky dory. You?

Ryan: Y'know, I saw on TV that pot helps beat the aftereffects of chemo.

Ferstopnick: Yeah.

Ryan: So what do you say, huh? Wanna hook me up?

Ferstopnick: You want me to give you marijuana?

Ryan: Yeah. For, what do you call it, medicinal purposes.

Ferstopnick: Nice try, kid. Looks like you got the cancer on the run, your hair's coming back, this will probably be your final treatment.

Ryan: Thank fucking Christ. Hey, how's Dr. Nathan doing? I haven't seen her around lately and I heard about her husband getting murdered and all. (Shots of Cyril killing Preston Nathan.)

Ferstopnick: The funeral was Thursday. She says she's coming back to work as early as tomorrow.

Ryan: That's an amazing woman.

Ferstopnick: Yeah.

Ryan: You see her, you tell her I'm sorry for her loss.

Ferstopnick: I will, O'Reily, I will.

Shannon: Hey, babe.

Ryan: Dr. Ferstopnick, this is my wife, Shannon.

Ferstopnick: Pleasure and a half.

Ryan: You haven't been to see me lately.

Shannon: I know. I been busy.

Ryan: Doing what?

Shannon: Taking care of your brother. He's a little out of control these days.

Ryan: Yeah, I called my cousin Matthew. He's gonna take Cyril in. You and I, Shannon, we're done.

Shannon: What?

Ryan: I don't wanna be married to you anymore.

Shannon: Why?

Ryan: I found someone else. Shannon.

(In the locker room.)

McManus: Gloria, what are you doing here?

Nathan: Gotta work, Tim. I got nothing else right now.

McManus: You should take a vacation.

Nathan: Where? How far do I have to go to get away from what happened? Y'know, we didn't have the best marriage, Preston and I. Too many games, too many tests, too much pride, but we really loved each other. We really did. He was a good man. Why'd he have to die?

(Hill narrating, with flashbacks of Cyril being arrested.)

Hill: Prisoner number 98P284, Cyril O'Reily. Convicted July 1, '98, murder in the first degree. Sentence: life. Up for parole in 60 years.

(In Em City.)

Ryan: Hey, Gloria, you're back. What?

Nathan: I became a doctor to help people. Now, I know that that sounds like a cliche, it sounds naive, but it's true. I could have a fancy practice anywhere, but instead I chose to work in Oz. I saved your life, O'Reily. And in return, you destroyed mine.

McManus: Your brother Cyril confessed.

Ryan: Shit.

McManus: Cops wanna interrogate you, although he's refusing to implicate you in the murder. He's gonna take the rap himself.

Ryan: McManus, you gotta see that I love her, man.

McManus: Love? What the fuck do you know about love?

Ryan: Well, what do you know, huh? What do any of us?

McManus: I know it's not a reason to commit murder.

Ryan: Yeah, well then, maybe you've never really been in love.

(Hill narrating.)

Hill: Life is no bed of roses. Then again, which of us wants to sleep on a bed of roses? You never get any rest. Any time you toss and turn, you get another thorn.

(In Beecher's and Keller's pod. Beecher has a nightmare about hitting Kathy Rockwell.)

Keller: Hey, hey, hey. You all right? Same nightmare, huh?

Beecher: I'm soaked.

Keller: Yeah, let's get you out of those.

Beecher: Thanks.

Keller: We need to do something about that tattoo.

Beecher: Oh, yeah? What are we gonna do?

Keller: I dunno. Let me think on it, huh? You're all right.

(In Sister Pete's office.)

Sister Pete: Good morning, Tobias.

Beecher: Morning.

Sister Pete: What's the matter?

Beecher: Nothing.

Sister Pete: Tobias, I see you almost every day. I know the difference between nothing and nothing.

Beecher: Two men shouldn't love each other. They can't feel the same things a man and a woman feel. I mean, if a guy has a lot of bad shit happen to him and another guy comforts him, I mean, that's all it is, right? I mean, that's not love, right?

Sister Pete: Well, some of the men here are homosexual and some need sex...

Beecher: I'm not talking about sex. I'm talking about love. I had sex with Schillinger. It was brutal, hardly loving. This is different.

Sister Pete: Tobias, are you in love with another man?

Beecher: I think so, yeah.

(In Em City. Mineo is doing a count for the night.)

CO: All right, everybody. Into your cells.

Keller: Got a surprise for you.

Beecher: A surprise?

Keller: I talked to a couple of guys who know about tattoos. They said 'cause yours was burned on instead of inked, it can't be removed.

Beecher: I coulda told you that.

Keller: You hate the swastika, right?

Beecher: Yeah.

Keller: OK, so then we fill it in, like that. OK, you don't like that? We'll be PC. Just do that.

Beecher: That's crazy.

Keller: Why crazy?

Beecher: As much as I wanna get rid of the fucking thing, I remember how painful it was going on. Both of those? That's a lot of burned flesh.

Keller: Which leads to the second part of my surprise. (He pulls out a jar of liquor.)

Beecher: What's that?

Keller: Moonshine. 101% pure alcohol. It's like the old West. Cowboy gets shot, you gotta remove the bullet. You take a couple snorts of this shit, you're not gonna feel anything.

Beecher: There's only one problem with that.

Keller: Yeah?

Beecher: I've been sober for over a year now.

Keller: So what?

Beecher: I'm an alcoholic. Every bad thing that's ever happened to me has been as a result of booze. I'm just now feeling I've beaten my heroin addiction. To go back home to alcohol...

Keller: OK.

Beecher: Don't be mad.

Keller: I'm not mad.

Beecher: Yeah, you are.

Keller: No, it was a stupid idea. I just didn't think things through. It's my problem. I don't think anything wrong of the fucking way of doing it.

Beecher: I hate it when you're self-deprecating. It's so cute. Where'd you get that stuff anyway?

Keller: Friend of mine in Unit B's rigged up a still.

(Later that night, Beecher wakes up from a nightmare and almost drinks the booze.)

(In the gym.)

Schillinger: So he didn't drink the moonshine?

Keller: Nope.

Schillinger: Fuck.

Keller: But he was close.

Schillinger: Close? What close? The whole idea here, the whole beauty of this plan, is that we keep digging up all the guilt and shame and all the shit that Beecher's got inside of him until he can't live with himself, until Beecher destroys himself. The alcohol's the key.

Keller: No, Vern, I'm the key. Beecher loves me. He won't admit it yet, but he loves me. I'll get him to drink.

Schillinger: I win.

Keller: (Sees Beecher come in and shoves Schillinger.) Fuck you, you fucking redneck!

Schillinger: Eat me, jizzball!

Keller: You'd like that, wouldn't ya?

Beecher: What the fuck was that about?

Keller: Who the fuck knows? I hate what that cocksucker did to you?

Beecher: Come on.

Keller: Cocksucker!

(In the showers.)

Keller: I don't understand. Your parents decide whether or not you get to see your own kids?

Beecher: No. They think, all things considered, I shouldn't spend time with 'em yet. Y'know, seeing me like this might do more harm than good.

Keller: Seeing you like this, what the fuck does that mean?

Beecher: You know.

Keller: Beecher, you're their father. For Christ's sake, everything they've been through, finding your wife, their mother, dead. They need you, not their grandparents. You.

Beecher: You think?

Keller: Despite everything you've gone through, one thing hasn't changed. They are your blood.

(In the visiting room.)

Beecher: Hey.

Gary: Daddy, Daddy, Daddy! I miss you, Daddy

Holly: I love you, Daddy.

(In the laundry room.)

Beecher: You're doing laundry?

Keller: Yeah.

Beecher: You hate doing laundry.

Keller: Yeah.

Beecher: Chris.

Keller: I'm celebrating your reunion.

Beecher: Are you nuts? They're gonna see you.

Keller: I don't care!

Beecher: All right. What happened?

Keller: Ahh...

Beecher: What? What?

Keller: Remember I told you I got married three times? Four times if you count Bonnie, who I married twice.

Beecher: Uh-huh. And why did you get married so often?

Keller: Call me old-fashioned. Before I fuck 'em, I marry 'em. Problem is, the sex is never as good as it is in the beginning. Once the sex sucks, I realize I got nothing in common with them.

Beecher: Genevieve and I had everything in common, 'til...

Keller: Bonnie just got married again. I shouldn't care, right? I divorced her twice. I didn't want her. Bitch.

Beecher: Come here. Get the fuck over here. (Keller doesn't move so Beecher goes to him.) I love you.

Keller: I love you, Toby. (He kisses Beecher until a CO catches them. Keller throws the jar of moonshine against the wall and the COs drag him to the Hole.) Fuck you! Fuck you! Motherfuckers!

(In Beecher's and Keller's pod at night. Beecher, thinking about his kids and Keller, finds more moonshine and drinks it.)

(Hill narrating.)

Hill: At the end of the day, a bed is the best friend you got. Sure, the mattress may be lumpy, the springs may have sprung, the bed itself may be in some seedy motel or in Oz. The bed beckons you. It comforts, cradles 'til you sleep. If you're lucky enough to have the right person lying next to you, shit, there ain't no reason you got to get out of that bed come morning. Goodnight, sleep tight, don't let the bed bugs bite.