 'Emily Post's' Guide To Vampire Etiquette
This is a Guide
for all of you who have never been invited to the local Master's house for...dinner before. It is a certainty that you'll have
questions on the proper way to dress and the proper behavior to exhibit at table. Hopefully, this will keep you from
making any serious faux pas as the night wears on, since we all know that faux pas around vampires tends to get ugly!
 1) One of the first things to do, after having accepted a dinner invitation to the Master's house, is to inquire of the Master or his servants whether the dinner is a formal occasion or not. It would definitely not do to show up to a formal dinner wearing a black leather Merry Widow, a leather micro-mini skirt and 6 inch spike heels...Can you imagine? 2) It is proper etiquette to bring a gift to the dinner in thanks for the invitation. This can be as simple as a piece of jewelry or as elaborate as the offering of the evening 'appetizer' for the vampires' use. 3) Upon arriving, you are required to engage in the formality of 'polite' conversation before the dinner moves into the dining area. Try to remember to stay away from any kind of political conversations...with vampires politics is always messy and sometimes deadly! 4) After being ushered into the dining area and the meal begins, remember that your host or hostess ALWAYS gets first bite. Not until then will anyone else be allowed to feed. Drooling over the food is considered highly improper, you are expected to be able to control your appetite better than that, and belching when you're finished is considered very gauche! Remember that vampires are always at the height of civility, even when they're trying to kill each other! 5) As the meal winds to a close, please be aware that asking for a 'vampire bag' for the leftovers is not only impolite, but, can be considered downright rude. Wars have started over lesser slights than this! 6) Remember to send a thank you note or make a thank you phone call the next evening. This let's the Master know that you appreciated the invitation and also will put you on the top of his or her list to be invited back again in the future. Now, here are a couple of tips for those of you who happen to be hosting this little get together... 1) There are two really basic things to remember when planning and hosting a party of this nature...The first is this: When planning the meal, be aware of the fact that necromancer, fae and lycanthropic blood have more 'kick' to it and will give your guests the best 'nutritional' value for their dining pleasure. 2) Secondly, try to relax and get your guests to relax with you. If you can get a group of vampires and other preternatural beings together for the evening, and that evening doesn't turn ugly at any point in time...or at least if noone dies at any point in time, your party has been a smashing success! |
