‘Ok, so it won’t be too bad,’ I thought. ‘It’s a penthouse, what could be so bad?’ Boy did I think wrong! Then again – it’s me we’re talking about! Anytime I travel, if something can go wrong, it will & usually does! We get to the penthouse, only to find one bed! I look over to see that Alex has the same look of total disbelief on his face as I. This is going to be interesting!
Well, let me tell ya this. Even though we only had one bed to sleep in, Alex was very sweet. He didn’t try to do anything last night, for which I was grateful! We ate a quick breakfast together before I left to go see my family, promising that I would try to get back in time for a nice dinner. I asked if he was sure if he didn’t want to join me, but he insisted that it would be just too weird for him, considering that we just met.
The two days were over quickly, but none too soon for my taste! I love my family, but they can be typical Scots! Get one or two angry or upset & you start a fight that will last probably for the next two years or more. On the second day (& thankfully the last) that is exactly what happened! I don’t know who started it, nor do I really care; I heard the raised voices, kissed my great-aunt Jenny goodbye, & left as quickly & quietly as possible.
I walked into the hotel room & saw Alex sitting by the window. He looked to be lost in thought, but he had a worried frown on his face. "You ok, Alex?" I asked, worried.
"I’m fine, just thinking about some things," he told me. I sensed he didn’t really want to talk about it, so I just nodded & let the topic drop.
"So…your family thing is done?" he asked me.
"Yup, it is…so tomorrow, I thought we could go see Stonehenge. My friend has a manor up there & I would like to go visit her. I am sure you would really like her, she’s fun! And then the next day we could…" I began. I knew I was babbling & even I could hear my Scots accent becoming broader with my excitement.
"Okay, I am going to take your word for it!!! You can send me or take me wherever, as long as you are with me," Alex said, cutting me off with a smile.
I smiled broadly & he returned the same smile; at least he was out of that somber mood I found him in a few minutes ago. Somehow, I wanted to make sure he stayed happy. Don’t ask me where that thought came from – I haven’t a clue! He’s been in my thoughts since I met him; we’ve had a couple of very nice, private dinners (he insisted on paying every time!), & then a couple of nice, quiet evenings, just talking quietly or watching a movie on TV.
‘Can I actually be falling in love with him?’ I think to myself. I can see the emotions in his eyes when he looks at me, but then again, maybe I’m reading too much into it; wishful thinking is all it is! Before I even realize what’s happening, he leans down and gently presses his lips to mine in one of those soft kisses of his. It startles me at first, but then I begin to kiss him back. How can I refuse to kiss him?
He breaks the kiss very gently & looks me in the eye. "I love you. I never thought I could fall this fast. Will you…" he paused, then continued, "be my girlfriend?" he asked.
I can’t believe he just said what I was thinking! He loves me? Before I can stop myself, I hear myself whisper, "I love you, too. Yes, I’ll be your girlfriend, Alex."
His entire face lights up with joy at my answer; I don’t think I’ve seen a man so happy in my life! He wraps his arms around me, pulling me closer to him & then kisses me deeply; I gladly return the passion-filled kiss as my arms go around his neck. I hear his low moan as my fingers run through his soft brown hair. I can feel his hands on my hips, holding me close to him, pulling me closer against him. ‘I have to stop this before we go too far,’ I think to myself. "Alex, please stop," I say, almost panicked.
"I’m sorry, what did I do?" he asks. "You haven’t backed away from my kiss before. What’s wrong?"
"It’s not you, Alex, I promise. It’s just that…" I began. How can I explain to him that I’m still a virgin? And that was the reason Mick abused me? Will he understand or will he be pissed at me, thinking I’m leading him on?
"It’s just what, Baby? Talk to me," he says gently, relaxing his hold around me and gently touching my cheek.
"Don’t cry; it can’t be that bad, can it?" he asks, as he wipes away the tears that have now begun to fall.
"I’m scared. The reason my last relationship ended was because he began to hit me. After two years of being together, we never slept together & he didn’t want to keep waiting. When I kept telling him no, he began to hit me. I took it for about a month, then left," I explained.
"You’re a virgin? Is that what you’re telling me, Lillian?" he asked, astonished. I couldn’t say anything, so I just nodded. I looked away, expecting him to get angry & walk away. I was completely taken by surprise when he turned my face towards his & locked his eyes with mine.
"Then it will be completely up to you. I won’t force the issue. Just tell me when you’re ready, Baby. I love you; I won’t ever hurt you," he said as he leaned down & placed a very gentle kiss on my lips again.
