Have you ever wondered why the Justice League and Legion of Doom never kill each other off? Well in a secret underground base of operations, both are the major players in an underground porn syndicate. They don’t want to hurt their business by killing off their accomplices, so they only appear to be enemies so they can keep their cover. I know what you’re thinking...the Justice League doesn’t do anything even remotely sex related, but that’s just what they want you to think. It’s the perfect cover really, protecting the world from an evil group of people bent on world domination while secretly selling illicit videos. Who would ever suspect them? This all happened gradually of course, when they first took on the job of protecting the world, they thought they’d get a better salary then the one they ended up with, so they approached the Legion of Doom secretly, with their proposal, and of course they accepted. (they’re the evil ones remember?) They split all of the profits 50/50. Some would say this is unfair because the Legion of Doom is forced to put out more money to keep up the cover, but the Justice League gets them most of their hardware, they only have to supply the software. (so if you think about it the Justice League is actually getting the bad end of the stick, but they’re not exactly the brightest crayons in the box so of course this fact alludes them) All of this would have remained hidden from the publics’ eye, if it wasn’t for Aquaman’s orange shirt. The green pants I can understand, he’s supposed to be a fish, but the orange shirt is a dead give-away to his underground pimp job. See as soon as the doors are closed, the guys all sport their animal print cowboy hats and hard-soled cowboy boots, while the girls, (Wonder Woman in particular) attire themselves in leopard print capris, (not the normal leopard print, but those funky spin-offs, purple and blue mostly) But as soon as the doors open they’re all in their normal costumes. Although most of the general public doesn’t want to believe that the Justice League could do anything along these lines, a select few know better, and these people will one day save the world from these so called ‘heroes’. But this is just what I’ve heard...I could be wrong of course. |
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Now...to be fair, here is a good picture of the fish boi...because I do respect Aquaman...one of my fav superheroes...
