February 2, 2003
I don’t understand guys at all. Okay I went on two dates with this guy, just two dates, and he’s already wanting to stick his tongue down my throat. All touchy-feely and come on just one kiss...I’m wondering if it’s all worth it. I seem to attract the weirdos. If it’s not a stalker it’s a hitter, if it’s not a hitter it’s a nympho. I just can’t win. Although I suppose the same could be said about women. Damn chauvinistic world.! Just wait until I take over the world. It won’t be a mans’ world anymore let me tell you...the farer sex will over-throw the idiotic males and throw them in an underground cage.! We only need them for sex, nothing else. Just you wait. Every female would have her own sex toy to play with at will. It’ll be grand...
February 3, 2003
Today I was paging through an old journal of mine, and a particular passage caught my eye. It reads; “I love my mom, but I’m forced to wonder if I truly love her, or if it’s the obligatory family love.” This is a little over four years old, and many things have changed. Today we got into yet another fight, and you know me, I just love rubbing my large vocabulary in other’s faces. Well apparently it really pissed her off and she beaned me in the side of the face with a dictionary. Those suckers hurt, a lot. Lovely eh.? I fekin hate her. Matricide looks rather good at the moment...
February 8, 2003
So much for the indifferent bitch routine. Everyday, I watch a little more of my best friend die away, and I am powerless to stop it because he refuses to let me in. I would understand not wanting to talk about a few things, but everything.? How can he expect me to bare my soul when he refuses to throw a scrap of his mind my way.? Do you have any idea how hard it is watching someone you adore fade away.? I practically worship the ground he walks on, but he has no clue, perhaps he just does not care.? I would like to think the former, but more and more I’m beginning to think the latter. Once, I looked forward to seeing him, talking to him...now I dread the sight of him...Gods, I love the boy, but I don’t know how much longer I can take being pushed away. Each time I see him, the wall between us gets thicker and thicker...I’ve been trying to claw my way through for so long that my fingers bleed...and I begin to grow tired. Again, he has no idea, or he cares not. Either way, I have that sinking feeling...I’m going to lose him. Lovely, another friend to scratch off the list, and another reason to add to the ‘Let us become a hermit’ list. So, yeah. The shadow of a human is now humanless...
February 9, 2003
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February 14, 2003
Lovely...it’s Valentine’s Day...again...and I am alone...again. But you know what.? I don’t care. I don’t need a significant other to make my life complete. I am content with simply being there for the one I love. I just wish people would project love more realistically. Love isn’t all happy little flowers and silly little poems, it’s freaking hard. There are obstacles, road hazards, potholes, rabid cows, lack of emotion; so many different difficulties arise while on the road of love. Anyway, if I want to see a movie tonight, I’ll go see one. If I want some flowers, I’ll dig some out of someone’s garden. If I want some candy, I’ll steal some. Why should I get upset over a false holiday created by the greeting card industry to boost sales in the month of February.? I shouldn’t. That’s the point. And neither should you. Stop swallowing the vile prescriptions from a corrupt monopoly of candy and card businesses. Stop being a pathetic sheep.! Stand up for your right to masturbate.! If the gods had wanted us to seek out love, they wouldn’t have given us fingers.!
February 16, 2003
Oh my gods...are you aware they sell pregnant Barbie.? I saw a commercial for pregnant Barbie...she comes with a changing table, crib, and a surprise baby.! Maternity clothes...the huge ass stomach...larger than normal boobs...I mean this sucker is freaking disturbing.! I was waiting for them to say she had an overactive bladder.! And they wonder why the children of America are so screwed up...look what they’re playing with.! What’s next...Rapist Ken.? Transsexual Barbie.? Bestiality Theresa.? She could come with a free tube of lube...I mean damn...pregnant Barbie...of course she’s not called pregnant Barbie...she’s like Family Fun Barbie or something...but still.! She’s freaking pregnant.! And who the hell is the father.?! I thought she and Ken were just friends.!? Garbie is the pole dancer damn it, GARBIE.! Not Barbie.! Garbie go kick ‘er ass.! Don’t let that blonde bimbo invade on your territory.! Shove that combat boot right up her plasticized anus.! She dumped you for the whore of a grocery bag Jason...don’t let her invade on YOUR pole time.! What the hell.!! Damn it Barbie.!! Stop being a slut.!! At least Garbie gets paid.!! Garbie.! Garbie.! Garbie.! Garbie.! Garbie.! Garbie.! Garbie.!
February 17, 2003
Alright...I joined this little internet community thing...and as a thank you for signing up, they send you a ‘wonderful free gift that everyone will love.!!’ (just to make this clear, the only reason I signed up was to get this free gift...just because it’s free and I had nothing to lose) So, a few weeks after...and I get a box of tampons and some shampoo. Now, a guy who joined the same community got his free gift, and you know what it was.? A mixed cd of a bunch of nice artists...I get freaking tampons and he gets a cd.?! That is sexual discrimination.! I feel discriminated against.! I want a damn cd.! I know tons of guys who need the shampoo a LOT more than I do.! Wait...are they saying I’m dirty.?! I’m not dirty damn it.! I shower every day.! Which is more than I can say for my skank of a cousin...stoopid guys...thinking their sweat smells SO good they just need to hold onto it as long as they can...And what if I don’t use tampons.? What if I just sit on a bucket all week.? Maybe I just sit on a bed made out of cotton balls.? Ever think of that.? Or maybe I’m not a girl at all...maybe I’m a billion year old man just TRYING to act like a girl.? Then what am I going to do with the tampons.? What if I’m bald.?? What if I accidentally clicked the wrong gender while signing up.?? I want a cd.! Feking tards...Bah.!
February 25, 2003
Alright. What is it with guys and not wiping their ass.? I mean seriously...doing the laundry with two guys in the house is like digging through the garbage at Babies-R-Us. It’s freaking disgusting. How hard is it to rip off a chunk of paper and wipe the poop from your butt.? Then they don’t flush...like it’s some sort of sin to push the little lever. Even if it was a sin, we’re all going to hell...so we might as well have fun getting there.! But it’s not a freaking sin to flush the toilet. Especially if you left a log...no one wants to lift the lid and see a floater with no damn paper. Nasty...on a totally different note...muh grandmother keeps screaming at me to do stuff. And I wouldn’t normally have a problem with some stuff, but she freaking screams SHADOW.! I can’t find my toothpaste.! SHADOW.! I can’t hold the tissue and blow at the same time.! SHADOW.! I can’t wipe my butt...bleh. It’s bad enough I have to play baby-sitter to the bitch, but now she can’t even remember my real name.? Why the hell should I do anything for someone who treats me like shiznit then won’t even call be by muh name.? Pfft...and my feking girlfriend broke up with me today. She just out and says ‘You’re a bit too freakish for my tastes. It was nice, but it’s over.’ I mean, that’s the ultimate of low blow-offs. You’re a bit too freakish.? She could have just told me she wasn’t into freaks, I would have understood. I never understood why people need to sugarcoat breakups. Like it’s going to hurt any less if they say you’re great before ripping your heart out...but it’s cool...I wasn’t expecting a commitment out of ‘er. Still...it kinda stings...my knee hurts...so does my hand...bleh type the rest yourself.
February 26, 2003
I hate that dough boi. He’s so stoopid. If I was one of those people I’d shove ‘is ass in the oven and hit bake. I wonder if he’s cake or a cookie.? Not that it matters of course...but I’m wondering if I should get frosting or chocolate chips...eh I’ll just get that chocolate chocolate frosting...then I’m set either way. Stoopid dough boi. Hoohoo.! BLEH.! I hate that stoopid laugh.! Stab ‘im with a fork.! SPORK.!!!
February 28, 2003
Alright...did you ever see that little five minuet movie with the goat, the carrot, the hand lotion, and the toaster.? If not, I’ll explain it to you. A masked person (probably male from the frame) was seen putting a carrot in a toaster. Then another masked person (probably another male) led a goat into the frame. When the toaster popped, they proceeded to coat the warm carrot in hand lotion...fast forward and the goat ends up eating a tarnished carrot. That poor little goat...that’s gotta be illegal. Who would want to do that to a goat anyway.? Sure, I like goats as much as the next girl...but damn...I’m never going to be able to eat a carrot again. And don’t even get me started on the hand lotion.! My gods...people are sick...sick sick sick...Poor lil goat...
February 29, 2003
I donated blood today...freaking vampires. First, I had to wait a freaking hour just to talk to one of the doodes. Then it took another half hour before all those stoopid questions were answered. The doode asked me if I had sex with any male in the year 1977...then got all pissy when I said ‘boi, I wasn’t alive...so if I was having sex something isn’t right...’ After that lovely question...he asked if I had sex with any male who had sex with another male in the year 1977...then he REALLY got pissy when I said ‘I honestly don’t know...the orgy last night was kinda crazy, and I didn’t get any names’...don’t say that to someone about to stab you with a sharp object...my feking finger still hurts. I plop down in one of those crazy chairs and wait another half hour...then this chick sneaks up behind me and screeches it my ear. I thought I was going to pee my pants. Blah blah blah...bleh bleh bleh...they stab meh...I get yelled at for poking at the needle in my arm. Then they have the audacity to reprimand me for having abnormally dark blood. Is that my fault.? Hell no. Feking idiots...THEN the cookie nazi took away my cookies. Said eating a whole row by myself is hindering the system. Bull feking turds. They sucked my blood, I think I earned those freaking cookies...damn it.!
