Mending Bridgesby Allison K. East
Jack sighed as he paused outside Carter’s lab. In many ways this would be the hardest conversation of all. He had already made his apologies to Daniel and Teal’c, the latter being more amenable than the former. The Jaffa warrior understood that Jack’s actions were part of the action to catch Maybourne’s “operatives”, though he was unused to such subterfuge. It also helped that he had not said anything hurtful to Teal’c. Daniel, on the other hand, was the unlucky bastard who drew the short straw to go and see him. Knowing the house was bugged, Jack could not let his guard down and tell his best friend what was really going on, so Daniel got the full blast of Jack’s act. Even after the copious apologies (which, quite frankly, he didn’t do too well) Jack could sense a certain reserve on Daniel’s part; though this didn’t stop them from having a reasonably good time drinking beer and watching TV. Dealing with Daniel’s inevitable hangover the next morning almost made it like old times. But it was different with Carter. There had been a subtle coolness of their relationship since before this little incident. Things hadn’t been the same between them since the three-plus months he had been stranded on Edora, and to be honest, he hadn’t been chasing her down to talk about it. It wasn’t like he owed her an explanation or anything. But perhaps he should have shown her the courtesy of explaining. After all, he didn’t act all that grateful to leave, and she had lost sleep trying to build the particle thingy that enabled them to open the buried Stargate. He sighed again. When did things get so complicated? “Was there anything you wanted, sir?” It took all he had not to jump out of his skin at the sudden sound of her voice. Despite standing outside Carter’s lab, he wasn’t expecting her to approach him. “Carter?” “You’ve been standing out here for a while now. I wondered if there was something you wanted.” Trust Carter to have known he was there all along. “I… I just wanted to apologise.” Damn, why was this so hard? She gave him a guarded look. “There’s no need to apologise, sir. I know you were just doing what you had to. And I understand why we weren’t told what you were doing.” “Yes there is. You don’t need to pretend that what I said didn’t hurt, Carter. Besides,” he looked around, but they were alone. “It’s not just for that. I also wanted to apologise for the way I acted that day on Edora.” The look in her expressive blue eyes told him that she knew what he was referring to. Although she steeled herself to hide it, there was a flash of pain there, and Jack winced at the thought of hurting her. Sighing, she stepped back to allow him into the lab, closing the door over, but not shutting it completely. Looking down at his hands, Jack found that it was harder to form the words than he thought. “I just wanted to tell you that despite the way I acted that day, I am grateful for all the work you did, making that particle-doohickie to bring me home.” She forced a smile. “So it was my long-winded technobabble that caused you to walk away, sir?” He hesitated. “Not exactly. You see, when I realised the gate was buried, there was a part of me that thought I’d never get home again.” “You’re the one who always says ‘No one gets left behind’, sir.” “I know, and I clung to that as I dug for the gate. But I’ve been with the Air Force a long time, Carter. I know that there’s some point where they decide that the expenditure of looking for one man is too much, and he gets declared MIA. As the months passed, I realised that it was likely I was declared MIA. Deep down I knew you wouldn’t just give up on me, but I had to let go of that hope and adapt to living there otherwise I would’ve gone crazy. Laira and the others that stayed behind had a lot to rebuild, and I just threw myself into that.” “There was something else, wasn’t there, sir.” Damn it, Carter’s too smart. “Yeah.” “Laira.” It was a statement, not a question. Jack nodded. “We grew closer as the time passed. I didn’t fall in love with her, not really, but if it had been longer… Anyway, the night before you guys came, we had a big celebration. I had a little too much to drink of their moonshine stuff, and Laira came to me.” “You don’t need to tell me this, sir…” “She asked me to give her a child, Carter. She wanted to have a baby. Now, maybe I’d had too much to drink, but it didn’t seem too much to ask at the time.” Jack looked at her Carter closely. “You know me, Carter. You know my history. Having made that commitment, I didn’t want to just walk away.” “Sir, the likelihood of conception happening…” “I know all that Carter, that isn’t the point. I didn’t want to just walk away from her, but I didn’t want to stay, either. I asked her to come with us,” he laughed hollowly. “I guess she saw that offer for what it was, ‘cos she turned it down. Said her place was with her people, and knew that my place was with mine.” “Sir… What are you going to do if it turns out that Laira is pregnant?” “I don’t know. I guess I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that I’m sorry for walking away like that, and that I really am grateful for everything that you did. I never meant to hurt you, Carter.” “I know. Thank you, sir.” “So… we’re cool?” Carter smiled, and it didn’t seem as forced as before. “We’re cool, sir.” “Cool.” With that, Jack left the lab and let her go back to whatever she was working on. Things weren’t entirely back to normal between them, but they were better than they were. With time, they would have their old working relationship back.
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