Chapter
4
A
Sister’s Love
June 16, 2005
Dear
Taylor,
I
know that you’ll never get to read this, but Kellie said it’ll help me to work
through my feelings. So here goes nothing…
It’s
been almost three years since you died. And I still miss you as much as I did
three years ago. Maybe I miss you so much more. But I know you’re out there
somewhere, keeping an eye on me. Just like you used to do before you got sick.
I remember our soccer games, how you always used to let me win. I remember how
you taught me about the stars and the names of the constellations. I remember
watching Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone when you dragged Mom and
I along to go and see it. And I remember the smile you had on your face when
you told me that Ireland had won the World Cup. You were so happy that they had
won. But four days later you took your own life. Why’d you do it, Tay? Why?
I
wish you were still here. I wish you were still around to help me with my
homework. I wish I could turn back the clock three years and stop you killing
yourself. But I know I can never do that. I know I shouldn’t even wish for you
to still be alive. But I do. I wish it every day. And every time I blow out the
candles on my birthday cake, that’s the wish I make. I know it’ll never come
true, but I can still hope can’t I?
If
there was one thing I could have in the whole world, it’d be for you to be
right here beside me. I miss your smile, I miss your voice, but most of all I miss
the way you always looked out for me. You never failed to keep an eye on me,
and I know you still do. I still have the note you left for me, and I have
never forgotten your last words to me. A sister’s love is stronger than any
other…it’s eternal. It never ends. Even I know that.
I
love you and I miss you so much, Tay. I think about you every day. I will never
forget you, not for as long as I live.
All
my love,
Avie.