Because At the End of the Day, I Lie Down Beside the One I Love
Wednesday, November 17th, 2004
Because At the End of the Day, I Lie Down Beside the One I Love
A Dom Entry
Today was more bloody Wednesday than I needed. Wednesday's been a sodding armful recently...since Mick-Mack decided that every Wednesday should be "Espresso Wednesday," that is. She's offered to let me in on the fun, bringing me my own steaming cup every mid-week, but I can only ever take a few swallows. I admit to her that Brits are more for tea, actually, and she suggests something about the amounts of tea in Australia and how natives are all forced to guzzle it down at such a young age, and she's surprised kangaroos aren't drunk on tea because there's always so much of it around. I don't know, though. Personally, I watered my kangaroo continuously with tea...
Anyway, while she's trying to break the record for most words in twenty seconds, I'm sorting her pile of mail because, apparently, economizing your speech doesn't make you very useful outside of auctioneering. And it especially doesn't help when all you seem to want to talk about is the many sounds that packing peanuts make when you're wading around in them in bare feet (instead of sorting your share of the post).
And yes, Marty's infamous packing peanuts are still lying around the office. More so than before since Mick-Mack decided to have her way with them. Bullocks, I need to get rid of those squeaky little things. You know, before something 'happens' involving the lot of them, a twittering little lass with an espresso, and a large box marked with the sign: "Return to Sender."
Got home finally after about fifteen hours of absolute pure caffienated nonsense. Though, when I say "got home" what I mean is "got to pick up Billy" which feels much the same anyway, and I was rewarded for all of my troubles with one long kiss in the school parking lot. It's a shame there was no one around to witness my reward; probably the best I've ever received. Lifetime Achievement, I'd say, with a delivery like that one. But most of the cars and buses had driven off long before Billy came through those school doors to meet me, looking tired but smiling nonetheless, finally away from that conference and the most recent set of parents. Seems everyone has questions about their little ones this time of year. How they're getting along with the other kids, if they're getting all of their little assignments in, if they're consuming much paste... I suppose that transition from kindergarten to first grade is a big step for anyone who can't stretch his legs more than a foot apart. It's got to be hard on those little guys. I know I'd be the first one in Mr. Boyd's office, if any little lad or lass of mine were starting their first year of six-hour school days. Wouldn't want them getting bullied around at recess, or using scissors in the wrong ways. But I won't have to worry. I know Billy would look after them. That's what daddies are for.
Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes... such lovely things have been running through my head. I've been making a habit of thinking about them everywhere I am - all of the wonderful things that are going to happen once Billy and I are married. We'll live in this house. And we're going to fill it up with love. We're going to make the whole world beautiful. And then we're going to have kids. Lots of them. And Billy will teach them first grade, and I'm going to pick them all up after work in our little car and we're going to have dinners around the table, and Holidays with the relatives who will watch the little things grow up more and more... I want all of that, because of Billy. I can already see vivid pictures of it at night when I'm sleeping, or even during the day when I'm daydreaming; just being in love with Billy, being a family with him...having a family with him... It makes me feel like making more of everything we have. I want babies with Billy. And that's something I never thought I'd want with anyone. I don't know why this ring on my finger keeps reminding me of that. Reminding me that there's so much ahead of us. Every time I see that little glitter in my eye, my heart does a little somersault. Someday in my future, I'll be at a wedding, and that wedding will be mine. And someday, I'll be holding a baby in my arms, and that baby will be mine. And on those days, I'll look up and see the only one I ever want to see beside me for the rest of time; my Billy Boyd. My sweetheart forever. My lover and best friend.
Mum and Dad are coming to visit in just about a week. Coming to see me and meet my Billy, in our little house, for a Thanksgiving dinner that we've made for them. That's when we'll tell them. We're getting married. Married; I'm getting married to the most beautiful creature in this endless universe. I found him; I offered him all of my heart and soul; he said yes. And my parents will understand in a second why I never came home; they won't even have to ask. He'll be standing right before them there, taking their breath away.
Today, Billy and I got home, stepped through the door of our little house, hung up our coats, and then turned to each other in silence. There was a glitter in Billy's eyes that I couldn't quite place, and a feeling inside of me that seemed to match his every expression. Wednesday was gone; the post office was gone; conferences and espressos and school were all gone. It was just the two of us, in our home, engaged lovers waiting for some secret moment to come and find us. And it had. Before we even had time to explain our days away, it came around us, and I took my Billy by the hand, and we traveled our stairs together without a word, and hid away from today in our room, tangled up in our bed, and we made love ten thousand times, until we had only enough strength to link our fingers and smile, and know that we have just begun to make this whole world beautiful.
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