America's Alzheimer's Patient

While roaming the halls, Ronald Reagan stumbled upon a time machine. Of course, he didn’t know it. He sat down inside it and pushed all the buttons while shouting something about his oatmeal being to hot. With a short attention span and no memory, he quickly tired of sitting in the contraption, which was made from the chasis of an old Depression era pickup truck, with a few lightbulbs added to give it some character. When Ronald stepped out, he was no longer in 1999 California. He was in Massachusetts in 1774. The British army had advanced to Lexington. They were on one side of the bridge and the scrappy Americans were on the other side. The armies stood face to face, unmoving. Suddenly Ronald appeared in the middle of the British ranks. His natural instinct was to wander around, which he did. He bumped into a Redcoat on the front line and his weapon discharged. The American Revolution was underway. All noise of the battle ws very frightening to Ronald so he climbed back into his seat to hide. The noises stopped and when he got out of the contraption, there was Nancy, greeting him with a warm smile and a bowl of oatmeal, chilled to perfection.