The first time I heard 'Blue', I was amazed at how well it described my depression. The song describes how this guy "lives in a blue world" and how "everything is blue for him"... And that's how I so often felt.
Being depressed is like nothing else I've ever experienced. I used to hear my friends say, "I'm so depressed, I have to stay home tonight," and such... Hey, I've even said that myself. But that is NOTHING in comparison to Major Depression.
I have been diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder, severe single. I think those words are self-explanatory, except maybe the "single" part. Basically that means I've only had one (single) episode of depression. There are many people, though, who suffer from recurrent depression, meaning they have had at least two, but often many, bouts of depression.
Living with depression is similar to living in a foggy world. Everything is dulled and blurred, and all your senses are affected by it. Everything you see, everything you taste, everything you FEEL is sad and unexciting. It can also be very dangerous; my depression worsened my eating disorder and my self-injury, and caused me to become suicidal. Because my depression was so severe I had to be hospitalized for my safety.
To be diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder, a person must exhibit the specified number of symptoms for at least two weeks (most of the day, and almost every day), and these symptoms must significantly interfere with that person's day-to-day life. I will use a hypothetical person, "John", for examples.
At least one of the following:
1. Abnormally depressed mood (John has become more withdrawn, quiet, and sad)
2. Loss of all interest and pleasure (John used to love football and recently he couldn't care less about it)
3. If 18 or younger, abnormally irritable mood (John rarely gets upset with his sister but lately he has been yelling at her for talking to him)
In addition, at least five of the following:
1. Abnormally depressed or irritated mood (see above)
2. Loss of all interest and pleasure (again, see above)
3. Abnormal weight loss/gain and/or abnormal changes in appetite, not associated with dieting (John used to eat a large snack after school, but now he skips his snack and also isn't hungry for dinner)
4. Activity disturbance, such as slowed or increased actions (It normally takes John 15 minutes to wash dishes; now he requires 45 minutes)
5. Abnormal fatigue/loss of energy (John lays around idle all afternoon because he has no energy to do anything)
6. Sleep disturbance, such as sleeping significantly more or less than usual, insomnia, or hypersomnia (John used to go to sleep at 10:30, but now he lays in bed, unable to fall asleep, until well past midnight)
7. Lack of concentration; indecisiveness (John cannot finish his tests in school because he cannot focus)
8. Inappropriate guilt or intensified self-reproach (John tells himself he is stupid and worthless if he makes a mistake)
9. Abnormal thoughts of death or suicide (John draws pictures of hanging himself)
If you recognize a few (or many) of these symptoms in yourself, I encourage you to talk to someone. You can speak to your medical doctor, therapist, psychiatrist, parents, school counsellor, nurse, ANYONE... If you feel you may be in immediate danger (i.e., you are considering suicide or other means of seriously harming yourself) SEEK HELP NOW!!!!! Call 911 or a local hotline.
If you suffer from depression, there are many options. If your safety is in danger, one of the options is hospitalizations. There are also intense outpatient programs available; talk to your local hospital. Treatment, whether inpatient or out, often includes medication. There are many meds for depression, including Prozac, Paxil, Celexa, Zoloft, Effexor, Luvox, and Wellbutrin (there are so many others, but I can't list them all!). It may take several trials to find a medication that works for you, and some people have mild to severe side effects. I, for example, tried all of the medications listed above, and many more, before I found one that works: I am currently taking Remeron. This medication helps me feel much less depressed and I experience almost no side effects.
There are other depressive disorders besides the one I wrote about here. Bipolar II (Manic-Depressive) Disorder is indicated by alternating periods of lows (in which many of the above symptoms are present) and highs (characterized by extreme hyperactivity, excitement, "happiness" etc.), and there are many other depressive disorders. See a professional if you or your family/friends think you may have a depressive disorder.
Read more about these and other disorders at Internet Mental Health.
