I gave it a try. My list:
1. Eat better - more; more variety
2. Stop hurting myself (by cutting, bruising, etc.)
3. Develop better communication with my parents
4. Work with the program [at Butler] and at Taunton State so that I can eventually go home
5. Stop hating myself
6. Learn to recognize, accept, and deal with my feelings
7. Get caught up in school so that I can graduate and go to college
8. Get back to sports and other extra-curricular activities
Where I was when I made this list:
1. I ate hardly anything, and when I did eat, it was limited to only four or five different items
2. I was self-injuring daily at home, and more than weekly at the hospital... and when I wasn't SM-ing, I was thinking about it and plotting it CONSTANTLY
3. I hardly talked to my family about anything but the most superficial - what my sister wore for Easter, stuff like that
4. I certainly wasn't working with ANY program... I never talked to staff, used my coping skills, etc., and GOING HOME was nowhere in my future!
5. If anyone remembers anything I said about myself at the time, they would remember only these words: "I hate myself." And I really did.
6. The only feelings I ever felt were "sad", "guilty", and "numb". And I obviously wasn't dealing with these very well!
7. I had already missed 3/4 of my junior year and I wasn't even TRYING to do work
8. Obviously since I was in the hospital there were no "extracurricular activities" for me
And where I am today:
1. I eat a healthy amount, and MUCH better variety... maybe not like a so-called "normal" person, but "normal enough"!
2. I have not hurt myself in SEVEN MONTHS - a HUGE accomplishment
3. I talk to my parents about myself, my day, what I want and need, and even sometimes how I feel
4. I worked with TSH, used my coping skills, talked to staff, WORKED ON MYSELF, etc., and to prove it -- I'm living AT HOME now!
5. I DON'T hate myself. I never thought I could say that. There are things I like about myself and things I dislike - but I don't dislike EVERYTHING!
6. I can recognize what emotion I'm feeling, and either write it or say it out loud (I OWN my feelings and I ACCEPT them) and I have ways to deal with my emotions!
7. I am back in school and doing well in my honors/AP courses... a member of NHS, taking PSATs and SATs, and doing everything I need to do so I can go to college
8. I am involved in Cross Country, Track, etc., Peer Leaders, Math Team, NHS... I'm getting a job...
SO.... It looks to me like I accomplished all these goals!!!!!!!!!!!!! *YAY*!!!! I never in a million years thought I would have been able to say that!
When I looked at that paper today, TEARS FORMED IN MY EYES. I was SO HAPPY and PROUD and AMAZED and EXCITED because, for once, I had actually SET GOALS, WORKED TOWARD THEM, and, best of all, REACHED THEM!!!!!
TRY IT!!!! Setting Goals
