Hello, I'm Ted. My little brother Lance wanted me to write something for his website. I say little, but I suppose I should say "younger brother", because Lance is taller than me now. I don't know why Lance asked me to write this. How could what I have to say possibly hold any interest for his web-going fan base? I've never had a website myself. I'm not a technological genius like Lance and Paul. I go more for the arts, but I don't draw comic books like Lance. I fancy myself a poet. I suppose I could put one of my poems up; but most of them are pretty long. And most of them were written expressly for ladies of my acquaintence. Lance and I are the most successful lady-killers in the family, I think; I've woo'd many a lady in my travelling days. There have been several girls who've captured my fancy, but none compare to Jeannette. Ah, Jeanette! So innocent and waiflike, clasped to the white bosom of tender mother Earth. Jeanette! Your beauty outbounds that of any other. Your glowing, ivory skin; your sparkling crystalline eyes; your passionite carmine lips. Jeanette! Your hair, a flowing cascade of golden sunshine down your warm, smooth back. Jeanette! An aroma of tingling floral heaven eminates from your shining essence. Jeanette! Jeanette! O God, Jeanette!


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