Unending

By Van


Everything was hazy. From the cloudy, overcast sky, to the foggy, forested mountainside, it was difficult to see clearly. Birds chirpped in the trees. Small creatures rustled the bushes. And there was the gentle sound of a cool, mountain stream.
It's not that she noticed it all. It was more like noticing that she didn't notice. She just accepted that it was there. It all meant nothing. The sights blended together, and the sounds were muted. Almost as if in a trance, she dipped a bucket into the stream, filling it with water. Then, slowly, she tipped the bucked, spilling the water back into the stream. She watched. It almost looked to be in slow motion. The sound it made was a mess, and it drowned out everything else. As the bucket emptied, she heard the laughing again.
It was something else she didn't notice anymore. She was never surprised to hear it, and she knew what to expect with it. She looked up, not by habit, but by random impulse, and saw the white figure disappearing into the mist. It was the last thing that anoyed her, and even then, only barely.
"Mary!"
She couldn't tell if she enjoyed it or not. Maybe she preferred being numb.
"Mary! What are you doing here? You really ought to eat your breakfast. It's not good for you to go hungry like this."
"I'm not," she responded automatically.
"Mary, please. I'm only trying to look out for you. I want to help."
Mary was pulled up to her feet and led back to the courtyard.
"Now, Mary, I have someone for you to meet today. My new assistant has arrived. He's going to help me, and he's going to try to help you, too."
"Tell him to stop."
"Stop what?"
"Laughing. I don't like it."
"No one is going to laugh at you, Mary."
"If he doesn't stop, I'll kill him."
"Maybe you'd better clean up. You've gotten mud all over your robe. And please eat your breakfast. It's gotten cold."
More time passed. She was lying on her cot. It felt the same as standing up. Her eyes were open, but she didn't see anything. She didn't absorb anything. It was all empty.
There was some knocking, then the door opened. "Hello, Mary. Glad to see you ate your food. This is my assistant. His name is Anji."
It was just another figure in a dark, brown robe.
"Anji will be sitting in with us today if that's all right with you."
"Fine."
"Good! Then let's begin. How do you feel today?"
"Nothing."
"Do you remember anything more?"
"Stop it."
"But we've only just started."
"Not you. That laughing. It annoys me."
"We're not laughing at you."
"Not you! Your friend in white. I don't like his laughing."
"Friend in white?"
"The one dressed in white. He wanders through the forest. He's always laughing... who is he?"
"Mary, all of the monks dress in plain, brown robes. You know that."
"Tell the one dressed in white that if he doesn't stop laughing at me, I'm going to kill him... him?"
"Kill!?"
"Quiet, Anji. Mary, all the monks are men. And none of us dress in white."
"But she said..."
"Hush! Mary, we'll come back later."
She was alone again, but she could still hear the voices in the hall.
"Father Brandeth, she said she was going to kill someone."
"Don't fear, Anji. She would never hurt anything. Not any of us, not the creatures in the forest, not even the insects on the ground. It's never happened, and I do not believe it ever would."
"How did she get this way?"
"I don't know, Anji. She's been this way as long as she's been here. She either can't remember or doesn't want to remember. She is very disconnected. It's difficult to reach her."
"How long has she been here?"
"For three generations."
"Three generations!? That can't be!"
"It is true, Anji, hard as it is to believe. Even more miraculous, she looks exactly the same as the day she was found."
"Bless my soul! What does it mean?"
"It is a miracle, Anji. But she is deeply troubled. She is a gift, but I believe we are meant to help her."
She realized that she was now sitting in clean soil in a garden. She must've fallen asleep before. Everything was still hazy, and she couldn't tell how much time had passed. Again, she only noticed how much she didn't notice. She felt empty, but empty or not, it was odd that she felt anything.
She grabbed a fist full of dirt, then let it slip slowly through her fingers. Every grain seemed to make a loud noise as it hit the ground.
"What are you thinking, now, Mary?" It was Brandeth.
She didn't answer.
"Father, why make the effort? She never seems to pay attention."
"Patience, Anji. Sometimes she remembers. Mary, how far back can you go?"
She felt a rush of familiarity, but quickly shut it out of her mind.
"Do you remember when I began to care for you? I was only an apprentice like Brother Anji, here. I took over for Father Caribo. Do you remember?"
Only barely.
"Do you remember when Father Driko found you?"
"Driko?"
"Yes! You remember?"
She held her head and ignored them.
"You need to try, Mary."
"No, I don't remember... Or, wait. Maybe I do." It was frustrating. She felt frustrated.
"Driko. Driko."
Mary got up and ran out of the garden as fast as she could. She glided over bushes and streams until she couldn't recognize where she was. Then she stopped. There was a slight pain in her head. Things began to clear. She thought back as far as she could to memories way out of reach.
"Driko," she repeated to herself. No, that wasn't it. "Draco!" It suddenly seemed so natural, and everything came back: Lighting, The Lylat Wars, Draco. None of it existed anymore, and nobody remembered except Mary. She couldn't figure out how long it had been. Centuries, at least. Millennia, perhaps. Either way, she was all that was left.
It saddened her deeply. How could she forget? Had she been alive that long? What else didn't she remember? Friends would come and go. The universe would change. But Mary didn't change. She was a constant. Time passed in the blink of an eye, and she could only imagine how long it would be before the only thing in the universe older than her was the universe itself. Her head throbbed.
"Draco!" Mary called out, "Why did you leave me?"
Disturbing the silence in the forest awakened the laughing again.
"STOP LAUGHING!" she shouted out in a rage as intense as any emotion she hadn't felt in a long time. She knew it was the man in white. "Show yourself!"
"I'm not a man," said a disturbed voice behind her.
Mary knew the voice, but it was impossible. "Who are you?" She already knew the answer, but it was impossible.
"Is this what you wanted?" Lighting asked. Her voice was unusually steady and clear. "You knew the consequences of the Angry God maneuver. Was it worth it?"
"How did you come here?"
"Is this what you wanted?"
"You did it, too."
"Look at you. Homeless. Friendless. Senseless. Mad beyond reason. You thought you had killed me, didn't you? You thought you had won, didn't you? Who's laughing now?"
Mary grabbed a fist full of dirt and flung it at Lightning, but it didn't reach her. Not even close.
"What did you think would happen?" Lightning continued, "Look at the trouble you're in. It's only going to get worse. The only way out is death. Unfortunately, it's not possible for you. Let the universe be your cage for eternity. I came back to laugh at your torment."
"No!" Mary felt something warm on her face. Tears. "No! You're dead!"
"You did this to yourself, Mary."
"Go away!" Mary wiped her tears and looked down. Her hands were red with blood. She began shaking.
"You can't take it back, Mary. It will continue forever."
Her head throbbed. Mary wanted it to end. She couldn't stand it anymore. She was numb. Lighting began laughing again. Mary wanted to apologize. She wanted Lighting to end her.
"You're unending."
But she couldn't bring herself to say it.
Unending.

Mary jerked up, groaning slightly. She was breathing fast. Her heart was pounding. Her fur was moist with persperation. She threw the covers off her bed and sat motionless.
Everything was still. It was late evening. The hospital room was dimly lit by a night-light. A machine whirred quietly next to the bed. She listened for a long time to the silence. There was no laughing, but she could remember it as clearly as yesterday. For a moment, she wondered how much of it was a dream.
Mary sobbed a bit. Eventually, she picked herself up and went to the sink for a drink of water. She filled a cup and then paused, looking at it. For a second, she felt the impulse to tip the cup and slowly pour the water out. But she couldn't. It would remind her of her dream, and she didn't feel emotionally equipped for it at the moment. Instead, she drank it slowly and deeply.
Afterwards, she looked into the mirror. The same old Lylatian rabbit stared back. Already, she was quite a bit older than she looked. She felt the bandages on the side of her head. She was still sore from the battle with Stryker, but she didn't want to think about it. All she knew now was that she didn't want to be alone.
As if by some ethereal karma, there came a gentle knock at the door. It opened, and Draco stuck his head in. "Are you decent?"
Mary sighed with relief. "Come in," she said quietly.
"Are you all right? You look upset."
If only Draco knew. "Bad dreams."
"I'm sorry to hear that. They must've been pretty ugly."
"I thought you left for Lylat."
"I don't leave until later this week."
Mary was glad to be back in reality. She sat back down on her bed. "Draco, can I ask you something?"
"Fire away."
Mary sighed, gathering her strength. "How long will you live?"
Draco chuckled. "That all depends. What have you heard?"
"Seriously, how long do Lylatian dragons live?"
Draco grimaced. "About eight-hundered to a thousand years. Some live as long as thirteen-hundered."
"Do you ever worry about losing friends because you'll live longer than them?"
"Mary, there's no sense in worrying about something like that. Assuming I don't get killed, I can't change the fact that I'll outlive everyone I know. Besides, I think you'll be around for a while." Draco smiled.
"So, what about me? You're not going to be around forever. How many times will I lose old friends? How quickly will I get tired of watching people around me grow old and die?"
"We all have to deal with loss sooner or later. Living forever doesn't change that."
"Are you so sure? For as long as you'll live, it will eventually be no more than the blink of an eye for me."
Draco paused for a long time, thinking. "I wish I had an answer for you."
Her thoughts drifted back to Lightning. Lightning was immortal, too, but Mary had killed her with the Lady Peace defense. Immortals CAN die, given the right conditions.
Then Mary remembered the clarity of Lightning in her dream. It made her wonder: was death really the end?