"David Hill trys to Fork Me!”
Here’s an interesting scammer who in the end try’s to tell me to “fork off” maybe he means “fuck off” or something. Anyhow I am trying to capitalize on his stupidity. The scammer claims to be David Hill, a white farmer, who had his farm taken away from him in Zimbabwe. Read on and see who gets “forked” in the end or what we Americans call “fucked” “screwed” “dicked” or any other description you can come up with.. So enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!!! Note: the phrases in () are my food for thought
Dear Sir/Madam,
I know this letter will come as a surprise to you, but I would like you to give it top consideration so as to help me and my family out from our present economic predicament, which the entire family is facing this time around. I am Hill the first son of Mr. Allan Hill a British citizen who based in Zimbabwe and also a farmer in Zimbabwe. My father Mr. Allan Hill who is now, under the Zimbabwean police custody is awaiting trial for not quiting his farm as directed and instructed by the Zimbabwe present president Mr. Robert Mogabe that the white farmers in the country should vacate their farm land and go back to their country. But my father due to what he has invested in
Zimbabwe and also on his farm refused quitting, it is because of this that the president instructed
police to lock him and all his properties are now seized by the Zimbabwean Government. All effort made by my father’s friend Mr. David Connelly, the Zimbabwean Chairman Justice for Agriculture and my mother who is also a Zimbabwean citizen to release my father was to no avail. My mother Mrs. Rebecca Hill knowing fully well the case of my father is a serious case revealed to me that my father Mr. Alan Hill deposited some money in a particular Security Company in United Arab Emirate which the name will be given to you as soon we get your positive responds. She has given all the necessary documents regarding the money to me and the money involved is twenty four million, seven hundred thousand United States dollars (24.7m USD). This money she said I
should search for a reliable foreigner who will help us to keep the money because of safety as instructed her by my father’s friend David Connelly of Zimbabwe. It’s due to this that my mother advised me to look for a foreigner that will help us accommodate this money with good faith. More information about this will be given to you as soon as I receive your positive response towards this proposal. Your urgent reply is needed towards this transaction through my confidential email address at lan_hill@yahoo.com Telphone 00971504735839.Please know that due to the nature of
this transaction I lan hill is now in Dubai to monitor this transaction carefully.
Thanks for your cooperation.
Mr. Lan Hill
(on behalf of Hill’s family).
(Wow!! Offers for millions everywhere. If I stay on this course I will be rich!! )
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Date: Tue, 22 Oct 2002 09:18:48 -0700 (PDT)
From: "Robert Brow"
Subject: Re: PLEASE HELP MY FAMILY
To: lan_hill@yahoo.com
Hello Ian
I am sorry to here about your misfortunes at your farm. I have been hearing about that on the news all the time. I will be happy to do business. Let me know what you need.
God bless
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Date: Tue, 22 Oct 2002 10:54:29 -0700 (PDT)
From: "lan hill"
Subject: We appreciate your understandingand help
To: rbrow2002@yahoo.com
Dear mr Robert Brow,
I am very happy to receive your mail right now and i wants to tell you that you will not regret any part of this business .As i have earlier said all the document regarding this business will be given to you as soon as possible .All i wants from you now is to forwards your datas to me together with your telephone number to for our easier communication and also you can call me on my telephone number right now in Dubai so as to enble me tell you your benefit regarding helping us to accomodate this money into your account as stated by my mother.my telephone number is00971504735837
I am expecting your call
mr lan Hill
( No way man. Not on my dime)
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Date: Wed, 23 Oct 2002 09:41:16 -0700 (PDT)
From: "Robert Brow"
Subject: Re: ALL NEW MAILS SHOULD BE SEND THROUGH HERE PLEASE
To: "MAXWELL KANU"
Hi Maxwell
I got your message. May we proceed. I tried calling your number but could not get through. Can we proceed with the business. Here is my fax number: (202) xxx-xxxx
(The Secret Service would love to hear from you)
Robert Brow
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Date: Wed, 23 Oct 2002 00:41:40 -0700
From: "MAXWELL KANU"
To: rbrow2002@yahoo.com
Subject: ALL NEW MAILS SHOULD BE SEND THROUGH HERE PLEASE
Dear mr Brow
I have been waithing for your reply or the telephpne call but no way. Please for security reasons you can reply any of our new mail from this new email address this is to aviod tress during the process of this transaction .this is why i decided to change the email address from my real owned one.please any further communication should be through this email address .please i am still waithing for your telephone number so that i can call you or you call me at 00971504735839. I will be waiting for your urgent reply today
lan hill (on behalf of hills family)
(What the hell is with this guy, multiple
personalities)
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Oct 28
Date: Mon, 28 Oct 2002 05:15:37 -0800
From: "MAXWELL KANU"
To: rbrow2002@yahoo.com
Subject: expecting the reply of my last mail and also your phone number for easy communic
Dear Robert Brow,
I got your mail and appreciate all you effort calling my number, as a matter of fact the number is always open any time you wants to
contact me phone 971-50-47-35-837.Mr Robert all i need urgently from you now is a photocopy of your international passport,this i will send to the legal department of the security company for them to make change of ownership of the consigment with your name.please mr Robert as soon as you send this required document,you have to start preparing your self towards coming to united
arab emirate (Dubai)in order to present your your self as the beneficiary of the consignment. Please you have to hasting up in what ever you are doing so that we can have out from the security company as soon as possible.
Thanks and God bless
Mr lan Hill
(on behalf of Hills Family)
(Please call gay sex hotline)
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Date: Mon, 28 Oct 2002 08:51:05 -0800 (PST)
From: "Robert Brow"
Subject: Re: expecting the reply of my last mail and also your phone number for easy communic
To: "MAXWELL KANU"
Hi Mr Maxwell
I tried calling that number but for some reason does not get through. I am on my way to London tonight. I will send a copy as soon as I get there. My stupid cousin got caught choking his chicken outside a notorious night club and is now in jail. I have to bail him out for his humiliating endeavor. Would you want to meet in London. I will be there for the next three weeks.
Mr Robert Brow
(Ass Clown)
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Date: Thu, 31 Oct 2002 19:18:56 -0800 (PST)
From: "Robert Brow"
Subject: Re: expecting the reply of my last mail and also your phone number for easy communic
To: "MAXWELL KANU"
Hi Maxwell
I am now in London and finally found a place to send email. Let me know if everything is OK
Robert
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Date: Fri, 1 Nov 2002 07:08:27 -0800
From: "MAXWELL KANU"
To: rbrow2002@yahoo.com
Subject: PLEASE LETS US TALK ON PHONE
Dear Brow,
I am very ok for now,and was very happy hearing from you in London this time around.please do not keep me in a dark any other time for long.Mr Brow i would like you to call me from London now for us to have some breif discussion regarding the whole thing and how we can proceed or you send me a telephone number were i can contact you in London.Mind you that my telephone number is 00971-50-47-35-839 and my new confidential email address is hill_family@37.com.please i am waiting your responds so
that we can talk on the phone.
THANKS AND GOD BLESS
MR LAN DAVID HILL.
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Date: Fri, 1 Nov 2002 08:21:20 -0800 (PST)
From: "Robert Brow"
Subject: Contact
To: hill_family@37.com
Hi Maxwell or Ian
Are Maxwell or Ian. Or are you speaking on behalf of Ian. I tried calling you again but no avail. Right now I am my brother's house. Unfortanatly he had his phone disconnected because of his brushes with the law. Like I said before I am here as a charachter witness because last week he was at a nightclub in London and met these girls. Well due to the fact my brother is not exactly the best lookin guy around the girls turned him down. He has a major growth coming out of his cheek looks like he's dippin' but not. He was so upset he decided to masturebate in front of a large crowd and go arrested. Let me know if any other means of commincation you need. I need this business. Would you want to meet in London. I never been here before.
Robert
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Date: Sat, 2 Nov 2002 01:09:51 -0800
From: "david hill"
To: rbrow2002@yahoo.com
Subject: HOW CAN I MEET YOU IN LONDON
Dear Brow,
I got your mail and the content was clear,please i am very sorry for the whole situation with your brother.now when do you think you are departing from London and if you wants me to be their how can i locate you when i get to London.Secondly another problem i will be facing is my Air ticket money can you be able to help me for the ticket from Dubai to London so that i can come over there so as to enble us discuse on how to proceed on the whole thing.please this should be reply so urgently. Very vital i am Lan David Hill and not maxwell kanu,i only sent you the mail through their for security purpose.but any new mail should be reply through this new e-mail address.
THANKS AND GODS BLESS.
Lan David Hill
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Date: Sat, 2 Nov 2002 14:12:42 -0800 (PST)
From: "Robert Brow"
Subject: Re: HOW CAN I MEET YOU IN LONDON,
To: "david hill"
Dear David
I will be leaving London on 13 Dec 02. You can meet me at the Heathrow International Airport. You will need to forward your flight info so I can meet you there.Also since I do not know you I will not pay for your ticket here. Since you have all the money you can use some to purchase a ticket here. Right now I am having problems getting money from my bank back in the states anyway. Looking forward to meet here in London. If you do want me to pay for your ticket you must prove to me who you are. I did not know if you are Maxwell or Ian. I will get your ticket if you get a camera and have someone take a picture of you holding a sign that says " I LIKE TO TAKE A DUMP NOW" which means to take the money today in American street slang. Make sure it is in big letters. This is proof of real business. Please do this and I will get you your ticket. Email the photo in form of JPEG to me.
Robert Brow
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Date: Sun, 3 Nov 2002 01:34:08 -0800
From: "david hill"
To: rbrow2002@yahoo.com
Subject: WOULD YOU LIKE HAVING MY PASSPORT?
Dear Brow,
I got your mail and would like to clearify you on an issues.I am lan David Hill not maxwell kanu,I only send the massege through maxwell email address when i found out that i have forgotten my password.I had you well and all those your long way is getting too much,I believe for this type of business to work out we have to trust each other.I trusted you that is why i sent you the proposal and you have to trust me too.Mr Brow all i know i can do is that i will send my international passport photograph to you and you need to call me so that we can discuss.i all beleive you still wants this business. Hoping to hear from you
LAN DAVID HIL
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Date: Sun, 3 Nov 2002 02:47:47 -0800 (PST)
From: "Robert Brow"
Subject: Re: WOULD YOU LIKE HAVING MY PASSPORT?
To: "david hill"
Hi David
First off is your name David or Ian. What name do your go by. I told you before I will buy you a ticket if you have someone take a picture of you holding a sign with big letters that says: " I LIKE TO TAKE A DUMP" Like I said before I will be here in London until Mid December. All you have to do is get a digital camera from your friends and take the photo with you holding the sign otherwise you will have to pay for your own ticket to meet me in London. That is the way I do business. I do have over $100000 currently on me for possible expenses that may arise from this. I won't spend a red cent until the requirements are met. Now I am willing to do this business with you but the passport will NOT BE SUFFICE. If you have the photo taken with you holding the sign I can also recognize you in the airport as well.
Robert Brow
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Date: Sun, 3 Nov 2002 10:30:37 -0800
From: "david hill"
To: rbrow2002@yahoo.com
Subject: i am making some contact
Dear Brow,
I got your mail and the content was very understood.As a matter of fact i am making some contact to the security company to see if the company will cargo the consignment(money) to London before my coming to London because it will be of no profit to us to come down to London without having the consignment down there,so i believe it will be more better if the will be able to send down the consignment down there before my coming or what do you think?.And for the picture i can only send my passport photo not any other thing as you are demanding,for the ticket money if you wish to help me well and if you do not want no problem all i know
is if the security company diplomate aggree to carry the consignment to London i must definitely be their,at wost i can go borrowing over here despaite the fact that i do not know much people over here.please i need your responds towards this mmediatly.
Lan david hill
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Date: Sun, 3 Nov 2002 12:21:08 -0800 (PST)
From: "Robert Brow"
Subject: Re: i am making some contact
To: "david hill"
Mr Hill
Go ahead and have the consignment sent to London. Also go ahead and send a copy of your passport to me. Since you can not do the other photo I can not pay for your ticket. I do that just for security purposes. When will you be coming to London. Make sure you give me your detailed flight information so I can meet at the airport. Also I need to know what you will be wearing, shirt, pants, types of shoes, etc. My brother is still in jail so we can go to his house with no problem where there is nobody there or we can go to a hotel whatever is easier for you. Are you ready to celebrate our riches!!!!
Robert Brow
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Date: Tue, 5 Nov 2002 09:21:54 -0800
From: "david hill"
To: rbrow2002@yahoo.com
Subject: please they era now in london how can they contact you?
Dear Brow the consignment is now in London and the Diplomate is calling me so that they will deliver the consignment to you before my arrival please how can they contact you immediately, please call me. thanks and
God bless.
DAVID LAN HILL.PLEASE I WILL SEND MY PHOTO TO YOU BEFORE MY COMING TO
LONDON.
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Date: Wed, 6 Nov 2002 00:48:33 -0800 (PST)
From: "Robert Brow"
Subject: Re: please they era now in london how can they contact you?
To: "david hill"
Hi David
I keep trying to call you but still no avail. I am getting an operator that speaks French and I don't understand French. I appreciate you coming to London. We are ready to do this deal. Last night I got wasted at a local bar, I almost got ran over by a trolley outside the bar last night. Then some crazy man came up to me claiming he's Jesus saying he can cure my headache. I don't know what this world is coming to. It gets weirder every day.Please send the passport via email attachment. Let me know of your flight details so I can meet you at the airport.
Robert Brow
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Date: Sun, 10 Nov 2002 04:56:19 -0800
From: "david hill"
To: rbrow2002@yahoo.com
Subject: how can they get intouch with you?
DEAR BROTHER,
PLEASE BETHER TELL ME HOW THE DIPLOMATE CAN GET INTOUCH WITH IN LONDON
THEY ARE THEIR RIHGT NOW SO I WILL KNOW IF MY OWN CONSIGNMENT IS THERE OR NOT BEFORE MY COMING.THIS YOU SHOULD DO IF YOU ARE SERIOUS ABOUT
THEY BUSINEES.
THANKS
DAVID
(You need to learn to spell!)
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Date: Sun, 10 Nov 2002 02:17:40 -0800 (PST)
From: "Robert Brow"
Subject: Re: please they era now in london how can they contact you?
To: "david hill"
Hi David
I have been waiting for your reply and have not heard from you. Are you on the way to London. Please let me know of your status. I have been trying to call you but no answer.
Robert
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Date: Tue, 12 Nov 2002 08:18:09 -0800 (PST)
From: "Robert Brow"
Subject: Re: how can they get intouch with you?
To: "david hill"
Hi David
I have not heard from you. I don't think this business is going to far. If you or your partner does not meet me here in London then I am taking my investments elsewhere. Are we still doing business or not.
Robert
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From David
Date: Tue, 12 Nov 2002 21:48:01 -0800
From: "david hill"
To: rbrow2002@yahoo.com
Subject: how can we go ahead
DEAR BROTHER,
PLEASE IF YOU CAN NOT CALL ON MY PHONE (00971-50-47-35-839)SO THAT WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS BUSINESS OR YOU GIVE ME YOUR NUMBER SO THAT I CAN CALL YOU,THEN THAT MEANS YOU CAN FORGET ABOUT THE BUSINESS.
THANKS VERY MUCH FOR DELAYING ME
(Oh, anytime, anything to be a help)
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Date: Tue, 12 Nov 2002 22:03:34 -0800 (PST)
From: "Robert Brow"
Subject: Re: how can we go ahead?
To: "david hill"
Hi David
Every time I try calling you, you always play games. The number does not get through. How many times do I have to tell you that. You never sent me you passport photo. I told I do not have a phone here at my brothers house. I just set up a toll free number for temporary purpose. Call me on this line ASAP Here is my number:
0909 666 xxxx ( Dudes for Ian)
Robert
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Date: Thu, 14 Nov 2002 02:18:44 -0800 (PST)
From: "Robert Brow"
Subject: I am sorry? Please forgive
To: "david hill"
Hey David
NOT!!! By the way I was intentionally delaying you. Because I love fucking with assrammers like you. Did you know that in the UAE they cut off people's hands for theft. I firmly agree with Islam's eye for an eye type of justice. I get these emails all the time and I make fun of the people who send them.Its actually quite humorous and entertaining. Go to http://www.quatloos.com and see for yourself. I have even had one scammer fly to Canada from Nigeria and I never showed. BOO HOO! :(. Boy was he pissed. See the whole purpose of you sending this email to me was to take money from me not give it to me. My purpose however is to sit at my computer and make you look like a jackass on your dime. You see I will make money off of you with out doing any business deals with you, because I collect all the emails I receive and send and will put them into a book and sell it. I will even sell it in the UAE because your letters will be in there. You can tell all your friends what a loser you are!!! Yo Momma iz gonna be prowd of u.
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Date: Thu, 14 Nov 2002 09:15:20 -0800
From: "david hill"
To: rbrow2002@yahoo.com
Subject: are you not a fork?
FROM THE FIRST DAY I KNOW YOU ARE A FORKER AND WHAT YOU GONA DO NOW IS YOU FORK YOUR MOTHER YOUR FATHER AT MY AGE AND YOUR ENTIAL FAMILY SHOULD BE FORKED DOWN,YOU NO WA I MEAN I SAID YOU ARE A FORK
(Ha Ha, Oh my feelings are so hurt, Boo hoo, Little David is gonna cry!)
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Date: Thu, 14 Nov 2002 19:16:07 -0800 (PST)
From: "Robert Brow"
Subject: Re: are you not a fork?
To: "david hill"
David
Oh my you hurt my feelings. You called me a "FORK" well you are a spoon. A fork is a eating utensil you dumbass. Where did you get the idea of calling me a fork. Where did that come about. You are a comedian. I enjoy this entertainment.
Robert
