The scene opens in an ornate movie theater, lights still up before a showing. There are two figures in the theater. One is sitting in a burgundy velvet seat with perfect posture, hands folded neatly in her lap. Her red hair is held back from a pale face with a black velvet headband. This is Isabelle, the 275-year-old vampire from Versailles, France. The other figure is bouncing around on top of seats, running up and down the aisle, and generally being hyper. She has caramel blonde hair loose about her face. This is Ella, the fifteen-year-old PPC agent.
The lights dim, and Ella squeals.
Ella: Ooh! It’s starting!
Isabelle: *glares at Ella* How can you be that excited about MSTing?
Ella: Because I’ve been trying to get this place up and running for a while!
*notices readers* Ooh! PEOPLE!
Isabelle: *glances at readers* Bonjour.
Ella: Okay, let’s go! *calls up to projection box* Iluuvatar, sweetie! Be a good mini and play the Badfic for Mommy and Auntie Isabelle!
Isabelle: Who is up there?
Ella; Iluuvatar, the mini-Balrog I adopted. I think Siriu is up there, too. They get along so nicely… Anyway. Go!
Snake Eyes and Flying Hearts
Isabelle: Is she referring to dice and cards?
By Maiden of Mystery
Ella: The Mystery: Why did she write this fic?
Chapter 1- She’s a Slytherin!
Draco Malfoy sneered as the famous Harry Potter walked over to the Gryffindor table.
Ella: …Because Harry was in Gryffindor…
‘That Potter! He should have listened. Oh, well. His problem.’ He gave out an evil smirk.
Isabelle: (Draco) *hands out an evil smirk* Be careful! It’s one of a kind!
Ella: *snickers*
After Harry was sorted into his group,
Ella: Group? It’s a HOUSE, for the love of God…
Professor McGonagall called the next person up. “Miss Sylia………”
Isabelle: Dropping periods as she went.
Suddenly, Draco noticed something that didn’t seem right.
Ella: (À la Miss Clavel) Something is not right!
“Why doesn’t she have a last name?” he asked to himself. He looked over at Professor Snape who was peering down at the girl seriously. Draco was confused.
Isabelle: (Draco) But… Snape is supposed to smile! And frolic with little pink bunnies!
Ella: (Draco) Why isn’t Snape wearing pants?
But when he turned around facing the girl, he gasped.
Isabelle: For the girl was no girl—she was a man!
The girl,
Isabelle: Merde.
Sylia, had slick and shiny raven black hair, pale skin, and beautiful emerald green eyes, almost snake-like.
Ella: They didn’t blink?
Isabelle: They had a little invisible eyelid that went sideways instead of blinking normally?
Ella: *mutters* Show-off.
Isabelle: *bares fangs* I heard that!
Ella: Eep!
Draco felt a tingle go down his spine as Sylia walked up to get sorted. He stared blankly at her. He felt his heart skip a beat and he was sweating.
Isabelle: He thought the author needed to vary her sentence structure. Or at least learn how to create compound sentences.
He smiled. “Please let her be in Slytherin! Please let her be in Slytherin!” He kept on repeating.
Ella: (Twenty minutes later) (Draco) Please… let… her… be… in… Slytherin…
Meanwhile, Harry was watching Draco stare and smile at Sylia in that way.
Ella: (Draco) How can anyone mix plaid with polka dots?
“Ron,” He started. “What’s up with Malfoy? Is he smitten?”
Isabelle: Would an eleven-year-old boy even KNOW the word ‘smitten’?
Ella: No. I’ve baby-sat for eleven-year-old boys.
“Malfoy? Smitten? Ha!” Ron Weasly
Ella: WEASLEY!
laughed and looked at Malfoy. “Hey, you might be right Harry!” They continued to watch Malfoy.
Ella: Picking his nose!
Back to Malfoy who was still staring and repeating. “Please let her be in Slytherin! Please let her be in Slytherin!” He sighed. “She’s so…………”
Isabelle: Stupid?
Ella: Sueish?
Suddenly, his eyes caught Harry and Ron watching him. He turned a very pale pink. Then he gave them the glare of death
Isabelle: Is that similar to the Evil Death Glare of Doom™?
Ella: I think that the EDGoD™ is scarier. Especially when you use it.
Isabelle: Why, thank you.
Ella: Ooh, I remember this… De rien!
Isabelle: Très bon.
causing Harry and Ron to turn back around. Malfoy rolled his eyes and watched Professor McGonagall hold the Sorting hat above Sylia’s head. This time he watched her seriously.
Professor McGonagall lowered the Sorting Hat, but before it could touch Sylia’s head, it decided. “SLYTHERIN!”
Ella: How can it decide before it’s touched her head? Barely touched, I understand. But what is she doing, giving off evil vibes?
Isabelle: Well, she is a Sue…
Everyone in Slytherin cheered loudly. Especially Draco. Sylia WAS the prettiest first-year in Slytherin.
Ella: *cough*Mary-Sue!*cough*
Sylia, with her head held high, walked gracefully to the Slytherin table and sat directly across from Malfoy.
Malfoy blushed.(!)
Isabelle: What is with the (!)? Just end it with an exclamation point, the story is stupid enough, anyway.
Then he smirked. “Good thing you were placed in Slytherin,” he commented.
Sylia smirked back. “Don’t worry, Malfoy,” she told him. “I was expecting it!”
They both laughed.
Ella: (Sylia) I shall now place my Sueish spell over the entire world! My plans for World Domination shall succeed! Muahahahaha!
After that, Draco turned to Snape who was still peering down at Sylia. This time, smiling.(!)
Isabelle: Again with the (!)!
*hey! Just to let ya know, this was my first Harry potter fic ever!
Ella: Unfortunately, not your last. And it’s ‘you.’
Hope ya liked it. Please review. If youre not a Malfoy fan, then either give me a good review or don’t review at all! If you are a Malfoy fan (like meJ), then still give me a good review.
Isabelle: *deadpan* She drives a hard bargain.
Ella: Who is this ‘meJ’?
Well CYA!*
Isabelle: Only ten more chapters and I’m through with her work!
Ella: *fidgets uncomfortably* Ah… well, not exactly. She’s started a sequel.
Isabelle: *long-suffering sigh* An MSTer’s work is never done.
Ella: Tell me about it. So. Do you want to get some food and keep MSTing?
Isabelle: Perhaps your friends at the PPC can get me an Elven Sue to feed off of instead of mortal food.
Ella: *shudders* Suit yourself. You really haven’t been feeding off of humans as much since you tasted Sue blood.
Isabelle: Well, the Evildoer is the best to feed off of. And Sues are definitely Evildoers.
Ella: True.*pulls out a cell phone and dials* Hey, Claudia, can you get HQ to send Isabelle a live and un-poisoned Elf-Sue, please? Okay. And can you get me a pizza, too? No, no extra cheese. No, not a white pizza! A normal pizza! Thank you! *hangs up*
Isabelle: Was she being difficult?
Ella: Yes. Anyway, our food will be here eventually. Let’s continue the MST. *calls up to projection room* Oy! Iluuvatar! Play the Badfic for Mommy, please! That’s a good mini! Yes, you’ll get some extra fangirls tonight!
Isabelle: It sickens me to hear you talk to that creature.
*just so you know, I own none of the harry potter characters EXCEPT for Sylia.
Ella: (Author) Lyke, don’t u luv her?!
And this is eet in their first year! Sorry for not saying anything earlier.*
Isabelle: It is eet? What is this ‘eet?’
Ella: I don’t know. *rereads sentence* Oh! She meant ‘set!’
Chapter 2-The Admirer
Since she became a Slytherin, Draco watched Sylia everyday, during class and while walking down the halls.
Ella: He hid in the bathroom while she showered.
Isabelle: (Sylia) God, stop stalking me!
He couldn't get her out of his head. Good. That's what he wanted. He had admired everything about her. How her eyes were snake-like,
Ella: Unblinking.
Isabelle: And had slits for pupils.
how her beautiful black hair curled up around her chin, and how she was the best of the first-years at potions.
Ella: *coughhack*SUE!*coughhack*
He didn't know what that meant but, he really didn't care.
Draco wasn't the only one who loved Sylia. Even though she was a Slytherin, practically EVERYONE that was male, straight, and a student adored her.
Isabelle: Because they all fell under the hypnotic power of her unblinking snake eyes.
Ella: (All male straight students) Ooh… unblinking eeeeeyes…
Crabbe and Goyle adored her, Neville Longbottom adored her, Seamus Finnagan adored her, even Oliver Wood adored her.
Ella: WHAT?! Oliver Wood is a fifth year! He wouldn’t bother with an eleven-year-old Slytherin girl!
Draco was of course jealous of Wood because he was the only Gryffindor that Sylia was "friends" with. However, the thing he was disgusted of was that all four of the Weasley males were in love with her as well.
Ella: The Weasleys are as anti-Slytherin as you can get! They wouldn’t be ‘in love’ with a Slytherin! Especially not fifth-year Percy, and the dynamic duo!
Isabelle: (Draco) How can they be attracted to someone so evil?
Ella: *begins humming ‘When You’re Evil’*
Then again, Draco knew well that Sylia would only fall for a pureblooded Slytherin...at least that was he thought and hoped.
Isabelle: (Draco) I wish, I wish, I wish…
Ella: I had wings!
One day, before class...
"Good morning, Miss Sylia," Percy Weasly
Isabelle: WEASLEY!
greeted Sylia in the hall. "That bag looks awfully heavy. Would you like me to carry that for you and walk you to class?"
Ella: (Percy) So I can then bludgeon you with your heavy bag?
Isabelle: And so you can show me your Sueish powers?
Overhearing the Gryffindor prefect, Malfoy's hand clenched up into a fist beside him. With that, he stormed towards them. However, before he could try and break the two up,
Ella: (Draco, À la Soup Nazi) BAD Percy! No Sue for you!
Sylia had already taken care of it.
"Looks aren't everything,
Isabelle: Really? Could have fooled me.
Weasly!"
Ella: WEASLEY! Okay, I’m counting.
‘Weasly’ count: 3
she told him. "I'll be fine. Besides, I don't like walking with people to class!" With that she turned around and walked to class, flashing her hair in Percy's face.
Isabelle: Last time I checked, hair shouldn’t flash. She should get that checked out.
While walking, she shook her head and muttered: "Gryffindors."
Ella: Smell icky.
Later on in Potions...
"Now then class..." Snape started.<
Ella: (Snape) Put away your notebooks, kids, it’s time for a quiz!
Isabelle: What?
Ella: I had a math teacher once who said that.
Meanwhile, Malfoy was, as usual, staring at Sylia in that way, smiling.
Isabelle: From this angle, her eyes look more like a cat then a snake…
This caught Harry's eye. He knudged Hermione who was sitting right next to him.
Ella: *pulls out pocket dictionary* ‘to knudge’… nope, not found. It’s a Sueism.
"What is it Harry?" Hermione whispered so quietly that Snape could not hear. "I'm trying to listen!"
Isabelle: (Hermione) Shhh! Snape hasn’t realized that he hates me yet! I want to postpone that moment as long as possible!
"You see what I mean? Look at Malfoy. Do you see it?"
Ella: (Harry) He’s not a natural blond! You can see dark roots!
Harry pointed to Malfoy who was staring away at the beautiful Sylia.
Hermione watched carefully. "Yes! Now I see it, Harry! Don't you, Ron? Ron?"
Isabelle: (Ron) Whoa… Draco’s really a brunet!
Ron was also staring and smiling at Sylia, only he had a lusty look in his eyes.
Ella: *hits head against armrest* Eleven… year… old… boys… are… not… lusty!
Hermione elbowed him snapping him out of his little trance.
Back to Malfoy. He was still in his little trance. He started to experience hallucinations.
Isabelle: (Draco) The room is spinning… in pretty colors…
Ella: Tsk, tsk. Draco shouldn’t be drinking strange potions!
Too bad he was enjoying them. In fact he loved every moment of them. He wanted more but...
Ella: He was ONLY ELEVEN!
Mr. Malfoy? Is everything alright?" Snape asked seriously.
Then, Draco snapped out of his trance. Everyone was staring at him. He blushed lightly.
Isabelle: How does one blush lightly?
Ella: I think the author is trying to say that Draco blushed a pale shade of pink. Or else, his blush didn’t weigh much.
"Yes. S-sorry, Professor."
That night...
"Eye of rabbit, harp string hum, turn this water into rum! Eye of rabbit, harp string hum, turn this water into rum! Eye of rabbit, harp string hum, turn this water into rum!"
Isabelle: Mon Dieu. Read the books. Spells are one or two word incantations, accompanied by a wand motion.
Ella: Well, it is first year. And on the train, Ron does try to turn Scabbers yellow with a similar spell. *shakes head* I’m defending her.
*BOOM* Once again, Seamus tried to turn his water into rum, but it backfired. Literally. Actually he was trying to impress Sylia.
Ella: *sarcastically* Noooo…
On the way to the common rooms, Sylia bumped into Seamus. Everyone stared as Sylia scanned Seamus. She smirked. "He. Like the hair, Finnagan!"
Isabelle: Finnegan!
she complimented. Then she headed on to her common room. While walking she overheard all the boys yelling: "I'm gonna do my hair like his!"
Ella: Baaaaa! Baaaaa!
and other stuff like that and shook her head.
***************************************************************
"I'm telling you! If I do my hair like Seamus had his, I'd have Sylia wrapped around my finger!" Ron announced to Harry and Hermione while going up the stairs on their way to the Gryffindor common room.
Isabelle: Yes. And you can fly with the wings you have on your back.
"And besides, red and green ARE the complimentary colors after all. She's perfct for me!"
Ella: So says the color wheel? This author really has some weird ideas about what attracts girls to guys.
"Nonsense!"
Harry, Ron, and Hermione turned around to see Draco, Crabbe, and Goyle standing at the foot of the stairs.
Ella: *Iron Chef-announcer style* And it’s Gryffindor’s famous trio versus Malfoy and his goons! Who will win it! Who’s cuisine reigns supreme?
Isabelle: You’ve been watching far too much Food Network…
"Didn't you know that Sylia only falls for Slytherin boys?" Draco sneered. "Or maybe you'd like me to spell it out. S-L-Y-T-H-E-R-I-N!!!"
Isabelle: *gasp* The author can spell ‘Slytherin!’
"And I'm surprised she hasn't fallen for YOUR charming looks/manners!" Hermione shot back at Draco.
Both: *blink, before collapsing in laughter*
Ella: Looks/manners? What is she thinking?
Isabelle: I don’t want to know…
Draco rolled his eyes in disgust as Hermione, Harry, and Ron walked up to their common room. "C'mon!"
Suddenly, Goyle's hand grabbed Draco's shoulder.
Ella: *thwacks herself* No! Bad mind! Very bad mind!
"Um...Draco?"
He seemed to have an idea for once. "I think I know how you can get Sylia's attention."
Draco froze and smiled. "Go on Goyle."
Isabelle: Ella, calm down. They’re eleven.
"Well I think Sylia would like you more if you redid your hair," Goyle went on.
Ella: (Goyle, in hairdresser-mode) *claps hands* I know just what we’re going to do with you!
Draco frowned and turned around. "So what you're trying to say, Goyle, is that I have to redo my hair just to get Sylia's attention?"
Both Crabbe and Goyle nodded.
Isabelle: (Crabbe) Just smile… and nod…
Ella: (Goyle) Right…
Draco looked down at his feet. He was standing on the moving stairs. "Why am I going up? C'mon! To the Common room!" With that, he headed down.
Ella: Onwards!
When they made it to the common room...
"Make it quick!" Draco told Crabbe and Goyle. "And don't make it hurt!"
Isabelle: Cutting your hair doesn’t hurt. Nor does dying it. This girl has phobias.
*once again if you arent a malfoy fan then either give me a good review or dont review at all! CYA*
Ella: And, once again, she gives us an amazing choice: Heads, I win, Tails, you lose.
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