<html> <!--Generated by Angelfire: L00S00--> <head> <title>A poet without love were a physical and metaphysical impossibility. </title> </head> <body bgcolor="#ffffff" background="multicolor1dots.art" text="#32cd32" link="#ff00ff" alink="#ff0000" vlink="#00bfff"> <basefont size="3"> <!--Header--> <h1 align="center">A poet without love were a physical and metaphysical impossibility. </h1> <!--EndHeader--> <!--Freetext--><center>~Thomas Carlyle~</center><hr>Here are some of the latest what I would call "somber love poems" I have written since November '99 to early May '00. If you have any questions, feel free to <a href="mailto:brytness@aol.com">ask</a>; I am always willing to answer your questions, but I'd like to know what you think, too. If you are looking for more updated poems, check out <a href="http://www.angelfire.com/rock/brytness/poetry/somberlove2">Somber Love II</a>. Yes, there is enough for multiple pages.<hr> <b>Maybe It Can Kill</b><br> I watched the moon<br> pull over the day<br>in this midnight mist, <br>which will forever<br>cover up our mistakes... <br>except for those saved for twilight--<br>like tonight's. <p> I wasn't mad when he left. <br> I wasn't mad when he didn't call<br>(though many will vouch<br>for madness). <br>For clarity, <br>I realized quickly, <br> "This time it's on my own." <br>For parody, <br> I tried to forget memories and <br>melodies, but I'd have to surrender<br>the effort instead. <br>No one listens anymore; <br>we all know I am the mess<br>that everyone compares themselves to<br>to make themselves feel better. <br>(I am a martyr in the making.) <p> I remember fireworks with Mom and dad<br> too well. I remember your slipping down your hand<br>for a touch closer to the heat. <br>Tonight a secret's coming out, <br>and I'd just plan to scream and shout, <br>"IT WAS BETTER<br> THAN ANYONE'S FIRST!" <p> And now I'm thirsty<br> for a request line, <br>a better hourglass to record our time, <br>our dreams apart; <br>Deepen our lively adventures, where I once was regretful; <br>but I'm never able to turn over<br>the experience of sunset, <br>of fire, of the water<br>that separates us still. <p> I thought looks would kill, <br> but I'm taking the drills <br>until I'm fully bruised. <br>050200 (112299)<p> <b>May Day</b><br> Letting go--<br>it's never going to happen. <br>Not letting it show<br>that all movements, <br>all breaths<br>are in yearning to let you know<br>that this "letting go"<br>was only the easier way to go.<p> Memories burned into souls, <br> our "forgetfulness" will erase all<br>we thought wasn't important to recall. <br>I've tried to enjoy what I love, <br>but even that is dying breath<br>floating among<br>words that will be coated <br>with only deathbed regrets, <br>silver penny bets<br>against all that would happen--<br>and did anyway.<p> Now that I know you're listening, <br> now that I know you're here, <br> there's no more "letting go," <br>there's no more reason to fear. <br>050100<p> <b>Tell Me What I Shouldn't Hear</b><br> Pollute my skies<br>but make the sunset <br>unimaginable. <br>Dye your innocent thoughts<br>in virgin blood--<br>before it drops. <br>Crumble memories<br>before they take us up again<br>and make us more than friends. <br>Sing me songs<br>but dilute the concentration<br>I have on your crystal eyes. <br>Don't let it come together--<br>you might see it clearer<br>when we're together, <br>but don't ask me what I'm feeling, <br>what these words are meaning<br>'cause I thought I had<br>lost you more every day, <br>but you've got me<br>thinking in a new way. <br>I've got answers for our yesterday<br>and a new way to read fortunes. <br> I've got new reasons<br>for wondering where you are<br>in every star; <br>you've got me inspired. <br>You've got me wondering<br>what I'm desiring<br>because you know who you are. <p> It's your move this time. <br> This time I've got to know... <br>is there farther to go? <br>050200<p> <center><b>The Crowned Virgin's Retaliation <br> Against All She Ever Knew</b><br> The touches you let me feel<br> have recently made me turn,<br> to burn the former desires for passion.<br> I'm more fearful of what I remembered,<br> and how I remembered it--<br> the closeness you made me wait for<br> that taught me more,<br> that forced me to reach inside my core<br> (so I could dive in before you did),<br> that made me feel more<br> within those first touches.<br> Now this crowned virgin crouches<br> with tainted fingertips<br> and a withering, rose crown--<br> like laughing clowns<br> we learned to love, then learned to hate.<br> I embodied it all too late<br> to have ever made a lasting impression<br> on you.<br> It's true: I fear you, your power,<br> the tides you made<br> when you first faltered.<br> I once thought of being alone with you again.<br> I thought of being more than friends,<br> searching farther within in embrace,<br> finding intentions swimming on your crystal face;<br> the control you'd have--do have...<br> and you laugh<br> with the omnipotence over the<br> weak creature<br> crouched beneath you now,<br> trying to get away and preserve this crown.<br> You try to tear me <br> ................................down...<br> and I know I must flee,<br> but this isn't coming as easily. <br> 041200, #603<p></center> <b>If he should choose to fall apart,<br> don't you think you should let him?</b><br> One never watches himself<br> coming out of recovery;<br> he's just glad to have made it,<br> to be stabilized;<br> to have found his yin and yang<br> together again--<br> or for the first time<br> he's seen in clearer.<br> He's older. Sure,<br> and should be decaying slowly now<br> content, complaisant.<br> He knows what all the words meant<br> and why their shadows folded<br> over wooden benches and bushes,<br> under secrets that crushed them<br> and could only be shared with the one he'll never have--<br> but he's accepted it now,<br> has entered new doors without security<br> and has seemingly survived the adventure well.<br> "Well, I'm here, at least."<br> At last he's come to know<br> how to cheat,<br> how to make it worth the effort,<br> how to let himself down<br> before he's approached the subject.<br> He's met all my warriors<br> before they beat him.<br> I've apologized<br> before saying anything<br> because I know<br> that this everything he's feeling<br> is nothing<br> but another push towards<br> never seeing himself fall.<br> 041600, #604<p> <b>one<br> the masses</b><br> i was feeling reckless<br> as if this pen could not support<br> my free-flowing words,<br> could not catch your attention,<br> match the masterpiece of<br> free-falling years,<br> near-crawling fears<br> that surface too proudly<br> over soap-sudded dreams.<br> i must clean these things--<br> for we can no longer clean ourselves<br> up over lost time.<br> (there was never a lost feeling.)<br> we are just beginning.<br> we are one step ahead<br> for just acknowledging<br> the separateness<br> of this seemingly connected form.<br> how dare others feel<br> bringing in another being to the heart<br> be relieving!<br> they're only feeling other hearts<br> outside their ribs,<br> trying to knock down perfect boundaries,<br> calling and only finding echoes.<br> you are too lonely.<br> i am, too, holding<br> too much back <br> from the ones <br> i should be honest with.<br> but at least i know<br> the truth. <br> 041800, #605<p> <b>we are victims of the innocents</b><br> we are separated<br> just so we'll never<br> understand ourselves and<br> each other in this life.<br> it's a game to win,<br> to take over the weak.<br> we try to find<br> ourselves in each other.<br> it's the closest to the truth <br> that we've ever been.<br> the flowers were tokens of love,<br> signs of appreciation<br> for staying so close<br> when we were really too far <br> into losing ourselves<br> in another day so familiar, <br> so simple.<br> complications are the <br> closing curtains of our stage.<br> comfort only lasts so long--<br> 'til you are ready to watch<br> it waste away.<br> we're not drowning in our insecurities--<br> we're only using experiences to pierce<br> another victim down<br> onto pen and paper.<br> to handle ourselves carefully,<br> we have to be carefree. <br> 041900, #606<p> <b>To Abstain</b><br> I wanted to kiss these nights away. <br>"Thanks for taking me all this way, <br> keeping me alive 'til today<br> with still no direction, no say<br> in how my role will play<br> a day from this rain<br> shivering on glass trees; it's plain<br> to see I must keep these memories in your name." <br> Trust me, I learned to scream in pain.<p> Was it wrong to pray<br> to stay alone in hopes that we may<br> live and lie as one again?<p> Was it a crime to play<br> the songs until I was blank?<p> Were my words too gray, <br> too obvious to stain <br> you to stay?<p> I wanted to abstain<br> from the profane<br> use of yesterdays<br> in an effort to keep the days away. <br> I wanted to wait <br> for you to turn and say, <br> "I've come back to stay<br> in your arms another day." <p> Instead I came too late. <br> 040200, #599<p> <b>Birthday Deathbed</b><br> I gotta say<br> ………gotta say it<br> …………………………..now<br> ……………………before I blow it away. <p> Worried that I've begun to see myself<br> ………………….as I fall<br> …………as though it were all<br> …………………………..that mattered now<br> …………and always again<br> …………………………………..we'll see it repeating<br> …………………………..within ourselves<br> to be friends--<br> ………………….yes, that's what we were<br> …………we are? <br> ………………….too automatic, too sudden. <br> …………I crave to ask, <br> …………"Will we ever be alone <br> again?" <br> …………………………..(Nothing is safe.) <br> Your habits will kill it, anyway. <br> …………I wanted to walk through the waves <br> ……………………………to save the kites<br> ………..that flew away<br> ………..in breezes of heavy sighs, <br> …………………..millions of miles away. <br> Never to stay, <br> ………………….just stain the white<br> ………………….of your artificial blue<br> ………………….eyes full of red<br> roses. <br> ………………………….No one knows this... <br> No one else seems me miss<br> …………a bouquet of kisses<br> this much<br> ………………….when I'm cold<br> ………..finally real<br> ………………….too, to believe<br> ………..that there really is no other force<br> ………………….behind the intentions<br> ………..that brought me here<br> ………………….in the<br> ………..first<br> place…..I've won a back-seat<br> …………………to the backbeat<br> ………..of your flaming heart--<br> …………………………..I overshot from the start<br> and decided to bleed my heart instead<br> ………..for you. <br> To you, an opportunity<br> ………..to fly away with your mouth full. <br> Another game we play. <br> Another path lost to yesterday. <br> Another truth too great. <br> ………………….………………….I will never be the same. <br> ………………….………………….I will blow away. <br> ………………….………………….040200, #600<p> <b>the heart that dies alone</b><br> never knowing what's going to happen, <br> i usually sleep with hopes that a dream<br> will become reality, <br> but instead i'm numbed to find<br> i'll sleep again<br> without you there. <br> and i can't even tell you why i care<br> to keep you this close, <br> to make you what i hope for<br> because nothing can be like it was before, <br> and there's really no reason<br> to wish for more, <br> 'cause i've been stoned; <br> i've stored you away in boxes: <br> letters, flowers, pictures<br> of another time, <br> for another place<br> to share when it won't hurt so much<br> to see the light striking<br> the turned-upside-down heart<br> that will never be the same. <br> MY HEART DIED ALONE IN THAT BOX. <br> when i'm alone, i ask myself, <br> "why did i let this happen? <br> did i give myself away one frantic night<br> knowing i'd be here now<br> so empty, forever close to being fixed--<br> always finding myself just starting<br> to crawl back inside myself?" <br> i know i'll have to conquer this by myself, <br> and discreetly i'll let you know<br> i'm on my way to recovery. <br> but i won't let you indifference<br> sway me<br> back. <br> 040200, #601<p> <b>Spring Forward, Fall Back</b><br> This Daylight Fading<br> was the hardest of them all; <br> it should have taken<br> 122 hours before<br> to restore this feeling. <br> Is he thinking<br> he should have stayed closer? <br> Is he making do, <br> making well the compliments, <br> making compliments for all too well, <br> those who make the love<br> that i never understood--<br> it was always farther than that, <br> deeper than that. <br> I thought I knew him better than that, <br> but I learned by my dosage again. <br> I took a new stand to wonder: <br> Where to begin? <br> This just in: we're all going to make it through, <br> but that must be meaning more somehow. <br> I'm taking more precaution now; <br> I'm testing the waters before I drown in them, <br> and baptize myself in dissolving eyes<br> that never would understand my lies--<br> maybe it's time to demoralize, <br> sink myself in bluer hues just to get a rise out of some of you. <br> I think this springing forward<br> is bound to bring something back. <br> 040200, #602<p> <b>Woke up</b><br> Realized I had hurt you so <br>six months ago; <br>six sweaty lovers undergo <br>the same thought <br>too late— <br>and everything you want <br>is never everything you need. <br>The melodies know the greed. <br>I know the mistake. <br>And there’s nothing left to take <br>after it’s all said and done. <br>Wanted to run <br>from this place. <br>Realized I had hurt you so <br>in the same grace <br>that prevents me from feeling so <br>good again. <br>Now friends and nothing more. <br>I wish I was a pure as I had been before <br>with the echoes of angels, <br>with the praises under my belt— <br>I had it all, <br>and I knew what I felt. <br>Now that you’re gone— <br>no, this won’t be another love song. <br>You’ve heard them all before. <br>Now a desire, <blockquote> but there’s nothing more.<br> 032800, #598</blockquote><p> <b>“I'm Falling Again”</b><br> Twins saw him falling again in their dreams<br> last night, and I didn't know whether<br> to cry or to wait……………..once more<br> for someone to wake me <br> from my own sleep………….my own confusion. <br> He's not home. <br> He'll never be back again…….no matter<br> what people say. <br> Those snow-covered mountains are higher<br> than I could ever take him. <br> I knew I was losing him from the start. <br> I wish I hadn't bled my heart<br> to show true love--…………...though I never had his. <br> I thought bliss would cover up<br> hindering worries, <br> but they've only been filtered back, <br> for they say he's coming back….no matter<br> what I try to say Though I know<br> he's leaving the hollow<br> skeleton of unending love behind. <br> I'm forever blind--……………..now broken in, <br> always dying from within<br> Twins’ dreams... <br> <blockquote>maybe I was the one falling,<br> ‘cause I have been living in these dreams<br> too long. 113099, #567</blockquote><p> <b>The Regret of Promises</b><br> I'm killing myself<br> over promises made for a future. <br> Like virginity, I didn't want to<br> give such a connection--or<br> lack thereof--a chance<br> to fly (away). <br> I'm lost in the pain<br> of losing myself. <br> I'm crashing <br> into the infinite space<br> of fate, of lost opportunities--<br> of something I may<br> or may not<br> have had control over. <br> Your heart, though<br> just a supplier<br> but the source of<br> my life, though<br> separate from myself. <br> I'm not myself, though<br> anymore after I promised<br> pre-Christmas presents<br> to myself with an essence<br> of yesterday caught in the bow. <br> Instead I'm walking<br> between broken glass ornaments, <br> trying to find a way out of <br> mirrored walls of this construction site<br> into something more stable<br> to look forward to<br> each night. 112999, #566<p> <b>Love-Knot</b><br> Someone tied my heart<br> in pink ribbons, <br> and I haven't been able to open up again. <br> If anything, I've closed down<br> inside myself, <br> for I'm beside myself, <br> trying to pass each day <br> without remembering<br> the fireworks of Independence Day; <br> While everything else escapes me, <br> this memory<br> is a stone in my throat. <br> Like sugar in my coffee, <br> I'm still convinced that we were meant to be<br> even after you turned me down<br> at midnight: our tacit fight in the<br> (silver) ring<br> doesn't have to mean anything... <br> There's just something that tells me <br> that things might be different<br> (but perhaps, just the same) <br> when you come back... <br> <blockquote>I think it's the swelling<br> in my heart which tells me that.<br> 112499 (9.19.99), #564</blockquote><p> <b>Resolution I</b><br> I'll watch the sun<br> fall over the horizon<br> and remember all <br> of the fireworks we encountered<br> on a First Night. <br> Today was the first fright<br> (secondary to Sunday nights), <br> but I'm coming down, <br> and you're coming home, <br> and I'm too ready to surrender, <br> I know. <br> I remember<br> too well your voice, <br> though emptiness has left me too much choice<br> between rhyme and reason. <br> Though time has passed, <br> the sun will come back<br> to shine upon me<br> (happiness). <br> I've decided to destroy regret<br> but to never forget<br> to never love this hard again. 112099, #562<p> <b>Resolution II</b><br> I'd tell you more<br> if I wasn't unsure<br> where you'd fly from here. <br> I'd make clay replicas<br> of concert seats, <br> easy chairs, and <br> candle-lit dinners <br> on the back patio<br> if I didn't think they'd be <br> glazed over at this point in time. <br> It's gone, I know. <br> I have admitted to myself--<br> I've crashed too many nights. <br> "No one's good enough for you," <br> I've been told, <br> so I've stopped expecting<br> (or wanting) as much. <br> Though I still reserve this seat for you<br> by the sunset, <br> for our secret<br> I'll always remember<br> a first kiss, <br> a first peak into your soul, <br> and the closing doors at the end <br> of our tunneling, blinding<br> love. <br> And I'll go on, <br> though it's gone<br> and done. 112099, #563<p> <b>Tin-Thin Tokens</b><br> I'm coming down<br> from my French champagne, <br> the climactic development<br> in my unruly rage<br> of remaining too long<br> in my otherwise empty cage. <br> I admittedly didn't know what it all meant<br> 'til you left<br> (caught in the webs<br> of your already-tangled mind). <br> You once locked me in<br> as Loneliness<br> as you kissed this girl<br> good-bye. <br> "Thanks for the time<br> spent," you whispered<br> as a farewell. <br> It was then I knew<br> I'd never kick this spell; <br> I'd remain in this burning hell<br> with copper-wire wings and<br> a white choir gown, <br> among other things<br> I've tried to change about myself. <br> But I can't help but wear<br> my tin-thin ring<br> and stare blankly until my eyes sting. <br> Though I'm losing out<br> even more than before, I know<br> I'm arriving at remission--<br> the only thing keeping me <br> from falling into you<br> is truth...and you know it better<br> than I do. 111699, #554<p> <b>A Purpose to Serve</b><br> Homecoming is<br> too fast for too good. <br> I'd rather be swimming<br> in your turquoise blues, <br> but even you're sliding<br> over the horizon into believing <br> dreams. It's easier, it seems, <br> to do the rearranging in our own<br> fantasies due to<br> what we choose to <br> see. But I don't even care if you're <br> reading closely... <br> I'd rather see it blindly<br> in the corners of my mind<br> until the feelings start to remind<br> me of something from a <br> Sunday. I couldn't bring it closer<br> to the fact <br> that I'd do anything to have you back... <br> but I'll have to wait until the white<br> fades to black<br> to have it mystical, magical... <br> <blockquote>maybe I'll see you on our <br> gradual incline...</blockquote><br> but the wheels begin to whine, <br> the songs begin to slow<br> as I try to let it flow<br> into the waters where we... <br> <blockquote>you know--<br> it was just you and me...</blockquote><br> But never again<br> <blockquote>will I dream<br> so hard.</blockquote><br> 110799, #549<p> <b>Soliloquy in the Snow</b><br> I took a walk through the midnight blizzard <br> because my mom was too afraid of the weather conditions. <br> But I could never thank her enough, for it was my mission<br> to find myself in the melting snow tonight. <p> I walked around the gravesite of our former life, <br> and I had meant to leave flowers, <br> but they would have only froze. <br> But just like this picture<br> —single footprints circling a single oblivion—<br> our memories are frozen in blocks of time<br> that no one will ever see again, <br> that only we will remember and cherish. <p> Admittedly, I tried to recreate our first glances, <br> our first kiss, and our first dance<br> in the reflecting moon, <br> but it wasn’t the same; it was stained<br> with the untouchable embraces, <br> the solemn words, and the unconnected stares<br> that cover our sacred tombstones for now<br> and forever. <p> I thought I was mad because I had no more chances, <br> but I realized quickly I was merely mad to have lost control<br> over all my romances. <br> "I’ll dominate the next one!" I whispered to myself, <br> but there were only snowflakes to hear me<br> and no one there to relieve me. <p> I took out the elegy my dear Cherub had written, <br> and as I read allowed I saw that I had given too much; <br> tonight was the first night that I ever regretted our adventure, <br> and I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. <br> Because tears would have frozen on frigid hands, <br> I decided my laughter would better echo in the woods<br> for all the future generations to learn from my wounds. <p> It took this visit surrounded in death to recognize<br> that I was not missing you but merely the memory. <br> It took ten months of wanting<br> to be only in your arms. <br> It took nine months of waiting<br> for the response I still have never heard. <br> It took eight months of pure clarification<br> to feel secure for once. <br> It took seven months of indecision, <br> even after the final resolution. <br> It took six months away from my life<br> to learn what’s on the other side.<p> It took five months within a spell<br> to finally light candles for the oversight. <br> It took four months of endless analysis<br> to decide I loved you more than myself. <br> It took three months of "getting by," <br> though I knew I’d say goodbye once more. <br> It took two months of sex and here after to know this sex of words<br> obliterated the meaning of anything else coming. <br> And it took one month to lose you once more<br> to find myself again.<p> It took one walk around my grave to see<br> that things will never be the way they were before. <br> It took one walk outside my mind to see<br> that I don’t need you anymore. 012100, #586<p> <b>Silent Snow</b><br> I skidded out of love that Tuesday night, <br> past the red light, <br> speeding through that familiar intersection. <br> I learned a new direction; <br> a new faith <br> guided me through silent snow<br> and frozen memories (in time). <br> I promised never to forget, <br> and I will never forget that promise<br> and all it meant at the time then<br> and "forever hours" afterward. <br> I wouldn’t have wanted to lose you this way, <br> but the tides parted that one day<br> I forgot to speak to you. <br> (I never forgot to know you.) <br> But I don’t regret it; <br> I was forced into a life<br> that was more than a step, <br> but I will learn and forgive those who forget. <br> Somehow it’s all clearer now<br> with each snow flake falling to tell me<br> not to be afraid of being different. 011800, #585<p> <b>Reflections in The End</b><br> A reflection used to say so much<br> until you realized it was backwards all along. <br> He was beautiful and divine<br> until you realized your perception was always wrong. <p> ...and I’d like to thank you for deserving me, <br> completing me how I wanted to be. <br> I’d take a star and place you on its point<br> to shine above and far<br> away from the monstrosity you left behind<br> after you lost the urge to find<br> your way through it all. <br> You were there for the photographs<br> while I was looking for more. <br> You were there when we laughed ‘til it hurt, <br> ‘til we parted with a tear, <br> but I was only supplied with fear. <p> ...and I wouldn't have wanted to lie<br> when it came down to the end. <br> But here is where I lie<br> now, facing the mirror of The End, <br> and I can only think how ironic it is<br> that we'd take it to this place<br> only to drop it thirteen stories once more. <br> I didn’t know it would hurt more than before, <br> but I was captured by your beauty<br> and twist turned backwards<br> in your sight. 011000, #581<p> <b>Distanced Miles</b><br> <i>to Mike V.</i><p> I feel distanced<br> now that I have come closer<br> to understanding; <br> I'm over<br> analyzing the waves, <br> the smiles. <br> You could have driven for miles<br> away from my mind, <br> but again you've returned<br> to pick me up, <br> drop me off<br> at the bus stop <br> of sleeping realities<br> that must have been printed<br> on sunburns years' past. <br> Passed years couldn't explain<br> silenced fantasies<br> or where they've taken me, <br> but you could only imagine; <br> you're the only one who ever saw it coming<br> as the sun fell over me. <br> Your body over me<br> I once said. <br> Now I can only plea for someone to<br> "Save me, save me, save me," <br> for no one will catch me. <br> Help me find a way back to me<br> now that I am closer to you. <br> <blockquote><i>Unforgotten smiles<br> for miles and miles.</i>011300, #582</blockquote> <b>Foolish Smiles</b><br> I woke up with my first regret<br> of ever having believed<br> you were dead-set in love, <br> for I saw your smiles<br> mirror her own, <br> foolish (glaring) smiles, <br> and you merely thought<br> you were feeling the sun.<p> I've tried to move passed<br> the cupid's arrow, <br> for it's another turn in line. <br> It's time for me to sleep<br> in hopes of finding love<br> soaked through my eyes, <br> each new morning, <br> <blockquote>each new love.</blockquote><p> I couldn't help but admit<br> that spending seven days in the sun<br> with you was one of the worst choices ever, <br> but I wish I could tell you now<br> with your new sunburned surrender<br> that her smiles are not the sun<br> from both sides; <p> the sunbeam glare tends to die. 021100, #587<p> <b>We Could Have Been</b><br> Giving up on giving in. <br> I guess we're better than we could have been<br> in dimming lights of school courtyards--<br> a secret full of shards<br> of glass from shattering dreams<br> of all we could have seen... <p> Inspired once again: <br> pushing that envelope towards "more than friends"<br> makes it harder for bittersweet amends<br> in the end--<br> but is it ever<br> really<br> over? <br> <blockquote>I let it reign.</blockquote><p> I feel the rain. <br> It soaks through memories<br> and stains them like strawberries<br> of another erotic pleasure<br> in only two minds. <br> I'm the only one who finds that special<br> apparently... missing more <br> than the time it would ever take to unwind. <p> So it was better to close down<br> from the opening of the heart. <br> It must have been another battle wound<br> from another war against<br> hard love. 031800, #592<p> <b>Dismount</b><br> I've been told only love can win. <br> Winners. Losers. <br> A million<br> hearts are broken every day<br> with no one left to spend <br> the ransom<br> on Starbucks treats<br> and delicacies<br> under sun-shot blankets, <br> wrapped in the only warmth<br> that'll ever remain true. <br> (And even the Star belongs<br> only to the blue-<br> ness of every day.) <br> The sun's moon is suddenly more blinding<br> like your eyes were during the landing, <br> feeling something never felt--<br> and never to be felt again. <br> I gave that to my best friend; <br> an artificial security<br> in hopes that one day the past will come alive. <br> To reach a higher mountain, <br> the hopes are to survive<br> each test of your strength, <br> each defeat of your challenge<br> as the stage is shattered again. 032200, #594<p> <b>First Time</b><br> For the first time, <br> she's angry for the last time<br> you spent together<br> in the company of each other<br> while you knew<br> the truth--<br> this last time <br> was the last time for good. <br> For the better of the neighborhood, <br> you promised never to play <br> with these matches again<br> and go back to the love of friends<br> (with the touches of lovers), <br> to seek amends<br> knowing the rest will remain undercover<br> to the rest of the world... <br> this girl won't forget, <br> can't regret the hard love<br> but can never get<br> it back to where you were<br> that last time.<p> And for the first time<br> she'd like to say you were wrong... <br> just in time to bleed<br> away every last memory<br> within every last song. 032200, #596<p> <b>Caramel</b><br> Have you ever seen those eyes<br> that just make your heart sting? <br> So gorgeous that they'd make your head spin, <br> always in disbelief<br> that they're seeing you<br> through the Iris of those caramel<br> dreams--fields of strawberries<br> that would never be the same. <br> Screaming his name inside<br> just so that the moment will never die. <br> The eyes that search your soul<br> for an invitation, <br> the eyes that scan your body<br> for an entrance, <br> the eyes that drag your eyes<br> for an understanding<br> for the tears the night before. <br> The eyes that you will love<br> and remember forever<br> for never making it as far<br> as you might have liked. <br> The eyes with broken stars, <br> gazes of aggression, <br> stares of compassion; <br> eyes that will never succeed<br> except in coating belief<br> with crazy, caramel dreams. 032200, #597<center> <!--EndFreetext--> <p> <!--Links--> <font size="5"></font> <p> <a href="/rock/brytness">Rain falls on everyone...I'm just trying to</a><br> <a href="mailto:brytness@aol.com">walk with you between the raindrops... ~SP</a><br> <p> <!--EndLinks--> <!--Counter--> <center><img src="/cgi-bin/Count.cgi"></center> <p> <!--EndCounter--> </body> </html>