GIG NUMBER ONE HUNDRED AND SIXTY-THREE
Who
I saved all my preparation for the Friday night, finding time at work to print off a discount voucher for Think Tank. I decided at the last second to change top into my appropriate kangaroo t-shirt and wrapped up warmly as it was rather cold. Annoyingly we were still in the grip of the coldest winter since the last ice age and I could barely fucking believe that we'd been treated to another bout of snow and sub-zero temperatures. It never crossed my mind for one second prior to booking the show that such a thing could happen! By this time though we were used to the cold and the midday train was just ten minutes late so we did alright, although the cold weather did put us off going to Think Tank. Despite the weather the city was rather busy - it was a Saturday after all - and I was not impressed that my camera was playing up with the same thing that had killed off the last one - a bloody lens error. This problem shut the camera down whenever I zoomed - which made me aware that perhaps I use the zoom function rather too often - but if I was patient and wasn't counting on split second reliability it could still take decent shots. It's not very nice though as I'd really gone out of my way to look after this particular camera. Upon arrival in Brum we broke the habit of a lifetime by going inside the Bullring Church, which was actually very impressive and much larger than it looks outside, although the fact I always struggle to get the whole thing in one shot should have given me a hint about that! My brother and I then trudged across the snow and slush towards Broad Street to visit the Ikon Gallery, which housed a mediocre collection of modern art and temporary exhibitions, but it was just nice to be visiting new places, and I rewarded them for their positive photography policy by donating as suggested.
Outside the Ikon Gallery was some cherry blossom covered in ice as even the trees had been fooled by the awful weather, and we briefly ventured into the Hall Of Memory, which was somewhere I'd often walked past but never bothered to go inside. We then wanted to head to St Philip's Cathedral but there was a random service on and we didn't fancy trudging back and forth anymore so decided to head into the Art Gallery. This also gave a much-needed opportunity to dry our soaking wet feet. The place was shockingly quiet though - although I guess people wouldn't want to get into Birmingham in this weather simply to look around the gallery - but it has a good and ever-changing selection of exhibits and is a great place to kill an hour or so. We then headed to the Symphony Hall to meet and pick up tickets, which didn't work out so well as the venue tried giving us the wrong ones! Fortunately we were on the ball and noticed they'd given just two tickets - rather than four - although the attendant wasn't as apologetic as he should have been for failing to check the name and confirmation number properly, thinking we would simply shrug and send two of our family home without seeing the show! His excuse was that the two confirmation numbers had been very similar but the main thing was that we spotted his fuck-up quickly and it was rectified without any further fuss. Now was the time to walk to the Brazilian restaurant down the canal, which was advertised as a six minute walk on Google Maps, but it took a few minutes longer in the conditions, and no thanks go to the wankers who continued their childish snowball fight as we passed and smashed me right in my hood - where are the police or bouncers of their pub when you need them? Throw away the key I say!
I'd been starving myself all day and was very much looking forwards to the meal, overcoming all the demands to switch to another place because a six minute walk was deemed "too far". And yes, it was expensive and pretty similar to the Amazonia restaurant, but the buffet was a bit better and the building was very swanky. We'd decided to head over in the late afternoon to give us a solid couple of hours of eating time and it was every bit as excellent as I'd expected, although I found myself full up before I knew it. The only criticism I could possibly make was that the sausages weren't very nice, and we'd popped in beforehand to check the opening times and to try and book but had been laughed off and told it was unnecessary, but then found that the place was pretty full by the time we left! Also I enjoyed the traffic light system which we used to say if we wanted them to keep bringing meat or if to stop, and we saved a good few pounds by getting a Twister ice cream at the Tesco Express in the complex. We left in excellent time for the 7:30pm scheduled start, as I'd had enough experience of posh concert halls to know that the time printed on the ticket is the time the artist actually gets onstage. I thought nothing of purchasing a programme for £6 and read through it beforehand, and despite the cool merchandise store I never had a proper look at the t-shirts on offer, but made time to have my photo taken with a life-size cut-out of Rolf. The venue was even lovelier than I remembered and our decision to pay a few extra pounds to sit in the centre of the stalls was a smart one. Also the staff were nice and polite, not giving us any hassle about taking in coats, bags or cameras.
The room is a stunning combination of a classic and modern style and has a lovely colour scheme, and we wondered if the cool spacecraft-like thing over the stage would descend if needed for certain performances. We took our seats - kicking out a dozy so-and-so who was in the wrong place - and took in the stage backdrop, which featured a massive Rolfaroo. There was a good mix of people in the crowd, ranging from children to the young and the old. Rolf had been making music for over fifty years and was still "cool" and attracting new admirers. Although I'd seen tickets were still on sale the place was either a sell-out or very near it in the end, and there was no indication that anybody had stayed home thanks to the weather. The show started a few minutes after 7:30pm as the band took to the stage, quickly followed by Rolf Harris himself. As expected he opened with Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport, but Rolf had a very Wayne Coynian manner of stopping the song to tell us things, bantering about someone using flash photography on him and at a guy who swiftly left the crowd with his kid, asking if we should wait for him. He won some applause by pretty much doing just that until he came back in, and Rolf was also very keen to show us that his wobble board was now painted on both sides to give us two choices of sound and imagery. A stop-start version of Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport was eventually completed and followed with snippets of some of the different versions of the song in existence, including the very angry-sounding German version! He then performed the country version in full, namely Tie Me Huntin' Dog Down, Jed, which is on the compilation album I have. At the outset loads of people were taking photos but I was keen to watch a bit of the show, although I can understand why the shot of Rolf with his wobble board was the defining one for most of the crowd.
Rolf was in a very bright blue shirt and seemed very energetic for an 82 year-old man, not tiring or sitting down at any point. Considering he was onstage for pretty much two hours in total this was an impressive achievement! It also made me wonder if it would be worth seeing Bruce Forsyth playing live, as Brucie was also playing the Symphony Hall in a few months time. Rolf was backed by a six-piece band, including a guy with a range of percussive instruments and a didgeridoo player who appeared on occasion. I'd pondered beforehand what the little stand on the stage was and it turned out to be a rest for the didgeridoo player to put the end of his instrument on, which I'd never have guessed. The show had been touted as Rolf talking about his life and experiences but the focus was very much on music, albeit with extensive inter-song banter. He said he was worried about making noise as the venue was plastered with signs saying "SH", before realising that stood for Symphony Hall, and also told an Irish joke, before deciding it was no longer appropriate to tell Irish jokes and switching to a joke about a couple of Albanians who had suspiciously Irish-sounding names! The joke was basically about killing a deer and arguing over which way to drag it so its antlers didn't get caught, so they tried turned it round and pondered why they were then getting further away from their car. One nice surprise was to hear Court Of King Caractacus, which is a very energetic song so was understandably slowed-down, but it got going nicely towards the end. The delight of the evening was hearing Jake The Peg though, sadly with no extra leg, but still Jake The Peg! Rolf said he was playing it on request and I see he's left it out of some of his previous setlists so I wasn't expecting it. He did play it in London in February though, so perhaps it is back for good!
The jokes continued, with one about a guy bemoaning the size of his gas bill, putting the blame on his wife for all her suicide attempts, and another one about a Scotsman meeting the grim reaper, who announces that he is death so the Scotsman repeats what he said, but louder. Very funny, certainly, but already familiar to me thanks to Rik Mayall telling the same joke in Bottom. I didn't quite get a joke about shoeing a horse, which was something about putting it in a vice to do the job, as far as I can gather the joke is simply the idea of putting a horse in a vice. It did remind me of Jack Dee's joke though, which was "I've never shoed a horse, but I once told a donkey to fuck off!" I tried that one out a week later and it didn't go down well, but I still like it! Another joke was about a girl from Essex getting caught in a car crash, and when asked where she was bleeding from she replied that she was from bleeding Romford! Rolf sung a song called Pavlova and vigorously argued that it was invented in his hometown of Perth, and not New Zealand as some have claimed. Rolf also gave a shout-out to anyone in the audience from Australia - there didn't seem to be anyone - and I've always been amazed how he could retain his strong accent after so many years in England living amongst us. I believe Rolf also performed Antipodean Flightless Bird Song, which tied in with a project that he'd also done a book and pictures for, before surprising us with a cover version of You Are My Sunshine, which was very nice but not quite as definitive as when Grandaddy had done it live.
The first half of the set closed in triumphant fashion though with Waltzing Matilda, which is so beloved it is almost regarded as the Australian national anthem. Rolf started off by explaining some of the terminology - just like in the CD version I've got - and the chorus really soared, despite some slightly annoying lights being flashed through the crowd from above. The song was a bit stop-start, especially when Rolf asked us to put our hands in the air for the "1-2-3" bit, and he stopped again to explain that a coolabah tree was a type of tree, but it was one of the highlights of the set and another one I wasn't really expecting him to sing. Rolf left the stage so we headed outside for the interval and I couldn't resist the sales pitch for some signed art books for £30, especially as the books were so chunky they may have been worth almost £30 unsigned. Even if it doesn't increase in value it's a nice souvenir, and at least I resisted the £12 mugs! One thing I don't understand though is why people pay large sums of money for prints - which are effectively just posters - so it meant a lot more to me to have something actually signed. There was also a pleasing symmetry that this was my 30th birthday, the book had cost £30 and I even had £30 in cash as a present on the day itself. Queuing for this though meant I had no time to get a drink and also that I had to balance both the book and programme between my legs for the remainder of the show along with my two thick coats, which brings me to my main criticism of the venue - a complete lack of legroom!
The second half of the set kicked off with Sun Arise, which I've never been too fond of, and it was introduced as a slow burner which was plugged for weeks by his record label to give people a chance to appreciate it, before climbing to number 2 in the charts. It never reached the pinnacle though as the eternally overrated Elvis Presley kept it at bay with Return To Sender. Rolf had changed into an even brighter purple top and commented on his Britney-style mic, which was flesh coloured so I'd actually mistook it to be a large wart. Rolf joked about that too, but maybe it's about time I got some new glasses! There was a bit of banter with the audience, including with a lady who was chewing gum, apparently in time to the song, and Rolf found time to pick out a wedding anniversary too. One real highlight was a song I'd never heard before - Bluer Than Blue - which Rolf correctly announced could have been a massive hit but he was put off by the wimpy line about crying, seeing as he's supposed to be a tough Australian male. Rolf then explained that he'd worked with George Martin before George got involved with The Beatles, saying that George was the guy who dealt with any outsiders on the record label who needed selling to a narrow-minded public. Rolf contrasted the progress of The Beatles with his career, pointing out that he was stuck with singing songs about a boy losing his mummy while The Beatles were busy experimenting, but all this was simply leading up to an enjoyable bounce through Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da. The time had now come for the promised live painting though, and I'd noticed that a canvas had been set up on the stage from the outset, which I correctly surmised had been pre-painted with the background to help speed the live painting up.
Rolf donned his white smock and was beaten to his "can you tell what it is yet?" catchphrase by an audience member who ruined the moment for everyone. Although the image was chunkier than it should have been and it dripped a little it soon became apparent that this was a drawing of Ayers Rock, and Rolf spent much of the time putting in clouds and rain detail as the crowd all got their cameras out to capture the moment. It was a pretty decent effort and I wonder how much it could sell for? I've always admired Rolf's art - especially his portrait of The Queen - and find it far more interesting than his animal rescue programmes, none of which I've ever felt compelled to watch. I felt a bit cheated to read that Rolf had also drawn Ayers Rock at his London show too, but it served the purpose of introducing the Raining On The Rock song, as Rolf could point at the painting of the rain doing exactly that whenever he hit the chorus. Sadly it was yet another cover version but these are good songs which he has made his own, and Rolf Harris freely admitted he isn't cutting edge like The Beatles were. Speaking of not being cutting edge, Rolf then introduced another cover version, saying he'd really enjoyed seeing the original performer live, and especially how the crowd had crazily sung back not only all the words but all the arrangements too. I thought it was Bohemian Rhapsody so was pretty disappointed when he launched into Delilah by Tom Jones. Nevertheless he had a good stab at it and, as I missed my chance to see Tom Jones playing a free set in Hyde Park for the Olympics, this was the closest I was ever going to get to seeing him live.
I've reached this far without mentioning Rolf's Diamond Jubilee Concert performance, which brilliantly showcased his likeability and national treasure status, but Lenny Henry lost a lot of respect for cutting him off during an impromptu rendition of Two Little Boys! Therefore it was a pleasure to hear a near-perfect rendition of the song, unusually with no breaks or anything to detract from its simple power. Rolf had succeeded in playing all of his biggest hits better than any 82 year-old should be able to and had now exceeded my expectations. He left the stage briefly, making it clear that we should applaud so he would come back for an encore, and was now donning the very impressive cloud jacket you can see in the photo above. I've always thought Led Zeppelin are one of the most overrated bands ever, in particular Stairway To Heaven, and can't say I was that bothered about hearing Rolf do it, but it's one of his most popular songs and he deserves credit for not basing it around that tedious introduction. Rolf admitted that he'd never heard it before recording it and combined the performance with the lyrics by getting Miss Given to bring him his didgeridoo and his wobble board to play, harnessing all of his energy to hoist the didgeridoo up to the mic. The band were introduced and by this point I was determined to capture as many photos as possible, shooting most of my best images including the one you see above, gritting my teeth as my camera kept cutting out again and again and again!
Perhaps the most amusing moment of the set was the "British version" of Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport, which in fact was Land Of Hope And Glory, as we all raised our hands to the air and enjoyed the juxtaposition, which in fact is something that Rolf has been playing for a very long time. Full credit to him for performing a 53 year-old song effectively three times in one show! Rolf then sung the praises for Lead Belly, treating us to snippets of several of their songs, leading me to expect to hear Where Did You Sleep Last Night, but instead the big finale was Goodnight, Irene. It was an effective, downbeat way to finish and Rolf took his time with the standing ovation, bowing, shaking hands and signing autographs for the front row. My Dad insisted we bolt for the exit as it was 10pm but we had plenty of time in which to catch the last train, and as far as I can gather I missed nothing else of any interest. It was bitterly cold and we were slowed down thanks to all the slush, but we arrived in good time. I probably could have got a McFlurry but settled for a Cherry Coke instead, downgrading to a can as the rude guy in the newsagents tried to overcharge me for a bottle. The journey home was trouble-free and I heard a good few of his songs while writing up some notes, completing this review just nine days later. The sound quality and venue had been excellent so there were no worries about my ears whistling, and the setlist was near-perfect too. In fact only the addition of Bohemian Rhapsody and Pistol Packin' Mama could have improved it, but all the biggest hits were present and correct. Not only did Rolf win the competition for my best live performance of March 2013, but it was a great way to celebrate 30 years on Earth and I even have a beautiful signed book of his art to enjoy too!
Mark: 8.5/10
Rolf Harris
Where
Birmingham Symphony Hall
When
23rd March 2013
Price
£35.00 (FREE for me!)
Who with
Mum, Dad, Alex
Position
Seated, in the middle
Comments
Seeing Rolf Harris was something I never thought I'd actually do, but I used to watch Rolf's Cartoon Club when I was little and was always intrigued by his popularity at Glastonbury. He only plays occasional shows and when I discovered that he was playing Birmingham Symphony Hall on the weekend before my 30th birthday - in his 60th year in show business - it seemed the perfect opportunity for a Saturday family outing. I knew that the Symphony Hall was a good venue after seeing Brian Wilson there and he was an entertainer who everyone could enjoy. Also the tickets were quite reasonably priced and he provided an excellent conclusion to my month of March, hot on the heels of My Bloody Valentine and Status Quo! In fact I'd been planning to go into Birmingham anyway to visit the Brazilian Rodizio Rico restaurant in The Mailbox to follow on from visiting the Amazonia restaurant on Broad Street last year. Brazilian all you can eat meat restaurants have fast become my favourite choice, even if this was just my fourth ever (I think)! To get myself into the mood I purchased Rolf's three disc greatest hits compilation, which was very reasonably priced and awash with cover versions. For some unforgivable reason his awesome cover of Bohemian Rhapsody was omitted, so it's fortunate it was one of the tracks I had already. I have to admit that I was slow to warm to Two Little Boys yet I think that's the same for most people, but it's a shame to learn that it's Thatcher's favourite song, putting it alongside How Much Is That Doggie In The Window in the chart of innocent records liked by supremely evil people!
Setlist
Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport
Tie Me Huntin' Dog Down, Jed
Court Of King Caractacus
Jimmy My Boy
Jake The Peg
Pavlova
Antipodean Flightless Bird Song
You Are My Sunshine
Waltzing Matilda
Sun Arise
Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da
Raining On The Rock
Delilah
Two Little Boys
Stairway To Heaven
Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport (British Version)
Goodnight, Irene
n.b. This setlist was from another gig, but it's either correct or similar
