Transcribed by Alan Back
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[The fun doesn't start until Mojo, Fuzzy, Him, and Princess beat the Powerpuffs for the first time...]
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"Him": (effeminate voice) Did we just do what I think we did?
Mojo: Yes. Individually we have failed time and again, but together we are victorious!
Princess: I propose we join forces and merge into one supervillain conglomerate!
Fuzzy: Blossom? Bubbles? And Buttercup? We beat ’em? We beat all of ’em?
"Him": That’s it! Oh, we will be known as…the Silver Beat Alls!
[The "Silver Beatles" was the band's name after "The Quarrymen" and before "The Beatles"]
Mojo: No! Too fancy. We shall be known simply as…the Beat Alls!
(All four smile, and the scene around their faces fades to black. The faces themselves are half-hidden in shadow and in black and white.)
[The picture is a parody of the Beatles' album "Meet the Beatles"]
(Cut to a group of screaming young girls. They run like crazy as an English announcer speaks.)
Announcer: Yes, screaming girls everywhere ran screaming whenever the Beat Alls made the scene. (The foursome come into view and walk single file along a crosswalk.) Individually, it had been a long and winding road. (They enter the National Trust Bank.) But together, the Beat Alls—or the "Bad Four," as they were also known— (Inside, they confront a row of scared tellers.) —had finally conquered Townsville.
[The crosswalk is a reference to the Beatles album cover "Abbey Road", "...long and winding road." is a lyrical reference to the song of the same name on the "Let it Be" album, National Trust is a reference to a lyric from the song "Happiness is a Warm Gun" from the White Album. John Lennon's glasses ("granny" glasses) used to be glasses that the National Trust gave away to poor old people. "Bad Four" is a parody on the Beatles' nickname of "Fab Four"]
(Mojo has his laser cannon pointed at a teller.)
Mojo: Now give me money! That’s what I want!
[Lyrical reference to the song "Money" from the Meet/With The Beatles album]
(She piles cash on the counter.)
Announcer: Their rise to fame can be attributed to their ability to deliver hit after hit after hit…
(A crash shakes the camera; Mojo recoils briefly. Pan quickly to where the girls have just smashed through the wall and are ready to throw down.)
Announcer: …to the Powerpuff Girls. (Pan back to the Beat Alls.)
"Him": (effeminate voice) Ah, I should have known better. (Mojo aims his cannon.)
[Lyrical reference to "I Should Have Known Better" from the A Hard Day's Night album.]
Announcer: With Mojo Jojo on blaster rays…
Mojo: Better run for your lives if you can, little girls! (He fires, hitting the girls.)
[Lyrical reference to "Run for Your Life" off of the Rubber Soul album]
Announcer: The acidic spit stylings of "Him"…
"Him": (to evil voice) Goo goo GOT YOU! (He spits a beam at them.)
[Lyrical reference from "I Am the Walrus" from the Magical Mystery Tour album.]
Announcer: Princess accompanying Mojo on blasters…
Princess: You say stop, but I say go, go, GO! (She fires her blaster at them.)
[Lyrical reference to "Hello, Goodbye" single]
Announcer: And Fuzzy, the shy one…
[Reference to the Beatles individual nicknames, the "Shy One" was Ringo.]
Fuzzy: (straining) I’m gonna let you down and leave you flat! (He throws the rock and crushes the girls.)
[Lyrical reference to "You Can't Do That" from A Hard Days' Night.]
Announcer: …provides the rock.
(The tellers regard the scene with fear, and the Beat Alls take a bow with their loot.)
[The Beatles always bowed after a live performance.]
Announcer: Thus the Brutish Invasion had begun.
[Parody of the "British Invasion"]
(The girls are blasted and crushed several more times in rhythm with the next line.)
Announcer: Again…and again…and again….
(After this last defeat, the camera turns up to show the Beat Alls leaning over a balcony railing and smiling down at their latest victory.)
[Parody of the album cover "Please Please Me" and the "Red Album"]
Announcer: …the girls were defeated by the Beat Alls.
(Cut to an ornate room, looking out the open door. The girls are in the doorway.)
Announcer: Till eventually— (They disappear.) —the girls stopped showing up entirely.
(Camera turns around quickly; we see a flash of a terrified crowd before the Beat Alls are seen on a stage, pummeling a band whose members bear a striking resemblance to the Beatles.)
[The band they're beating up is in the style of cartoon version of the Beatles from the early Beatles cartoon that played from 1965-1990.]
Announcer: And the Beat Alls had a ticket to ride.
[From the "Ticket to Ride" single]
Mojo: Will the people in the cheap seats please leave! And the rest of you, hand over your jewelry!
[Reference to a John Lennon quote; "Will the people in the cheaper seats clap your hands, and the rest of you'll just rattle your jewelry."]
(Hands holding watches, necklaces, and rings reach up into view. Cut to a quick succession of B&W head shots of each villain in various poses.)
[Parody of the Beatles "A Hard Day's Night" movie.]
Announcer: Having finally bested the Powerpuff Girls, the Beat Alls rushed to the top of the charts of the Most Wanted list.
[As opposed to the top of the music charts.]
(Four rows of six photos each, one villain per row, appear on the screen with the word "WANTED…" above them. The scene dissolves to the police station.)
[Parody of the Beatles "A Hard Day's Night" album cover.]
Announcer: When questioned, authorities had this to say.
(Close-up of a tall, white-mustached, ornately dressed policeman at a podium, with microphones set up before him. Flashbulbs pop as he begins to speak, also with a British accent.)
Policeman: Thank you. My name is Sergeant Pepper of the Townsville Police, and at the request of my commanding officers, I’d like to make this statement. (clearing throat) Help! We need somebody! Help! Not just anybody! Help! We need the Powerpuff Girls! (clearing throat again) Thank you.
[The man is dressed up like Old Fred from Yellow Submarine, "Sgt. Pepper" was the name an album, "Help! We need somebody..." is a lyrical reference to the song "Help!" from the Help! album.]
(Cut to the exterior of the house. A reporter is across the street from it, facing the camera. He wears a trenchcoat and speaks into a microphone; it is his voice that has been outlining this whole sequence of events.)
Announcer (Reporter): So there you have it. The Beat Alls have taken over; the girls have taken off. Will they return? Perhaps, perhaps not. But as they say, tomorrow never knows. I’m Stuart Best, and this has been A Day in the Life.
["Tomorrow never knows..." is a lyrical reference to the song of the same name from the Revolver album, Stuart Best is a play on the names Stuart Sutcliffe and Pete Best, both former Beatles. "A Day in the Life" is the name of a song off of the "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Heart's Club Band" album.]
(We have been watching a news program on the Beat Alls.)
Buttercup: (from o.c.) Ugh! Turn it off!
(The girls have been watching the same program. The screen flickers and goes dark—they have switched off the TV—and the camera shifts to show them on the couch in the living room.)
Buttercup: Who would make a stupid documentary about the Beat Alls, anyway? (The Professor approaches, looking at a newspaper.)
Professor: Girls? Girls! I read the news today—oh, boy. (He drops the paper to Blossom.)
["I read the news today--oh, boy" is a lyrical reference to "A Day in the Life" off of the Sgt. Pepper album]
Blossom: (reading) "Beat Alls crash Mr. Kite’s benefit. Powerpuffs nowhere in sight." (looking up angrily) So what?
["Being For the Benefit of Mister Kite" is a song off of the Sgt. Pepper album.]
Professor: Ah, girls. (sitting next to them) Yesterday all our troubles seemed so far away. Now it seems they’re here to stay. Sitting here eight days a week, everyone seems to think you’re lazy. I don’t mind; I think they’re crazy. But you used to be running everywhere at such a speed. Now you think there’s no need.
["Yesterday...here to stay" is a lyrical reference to the song "Yesterday", "...eight days a week..." is a lyrical reference to the single "Eight Days a Week", "...everyone seems to think...there's no need." is from the song "I'm Only Sleeping" from the Revolver album.]
Buttercup: There isn’t!
Bubbles: If we can’t stop the Beat Alls—
Blossom: —we’re never saving the day again.
Professor: Ohhh, you can’t do that! What will Townsville do when they look for the girls with the sun in their eyes and they’re gone?
["Ohhh, you can't do that!" is a lyrical reference to "You Can't Do That" from A Hard Day's Night. "...look for the girls...gone" is a lyrical reference to "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" from the Sgt. Pepper album.]
Blossom: But what can we do?
Professor: Well, first you have to realize the Beat Alls are just a rock band.
Girls: Huh?
Professor: (raising hands above head) Fuzzy. He does that…rock thing, you—you know. (lowering hands) But that’s not important. But what is important is this: Mojo Jojo was a man who thought he was a loner, but he knew it couldn’t last. He’s just getting by with a little help from his friends.
["Mojo Jojo...couldn't last" is a lyrical reference to "Get Back" from the Let it Be album. "...a little help from his friends." is a lyrical reference to "A Little Help From My Friends" from the Sgt. Pepper album.]
Buttercup: Are you saying we should try and break up the Beat Alls?
Bubbles: Is that possible?
Professor: Yes. I’m certain that it happens all the time.
[Reference to lyric from the song "With a Little Help From My Friends" from Sgt. Pepper album.]
Girls: But how?
Professor: Listen. Do you want to know a secret? (He begins whispering to them.)
[Lyrical reference to "Do You Want to Know a Secret?" from the "Please Please Me" album]
Narrator: Sounds like the Professor has some magical mystery tricks up his sleeve!
[Reference to the album and song "Magical Mystery Tour"]
(Quick wipe to the exterior of the Bank of the Imperial Garden. An alarm is going off. Inside, the Beat Alls kick in the front door.)
["sitting in an English garden" from 'I Am The Walrus' on the Magical Mystery Tour album]
Mojo: I want to hold your cash!
[Parody of "I Wanna Hold Your Hand"]
(Pull back quickly to show a man and a woman on the floor at the other end of the lobby.)
Man: (pointing o.c.) Too late. Somebody beat you to it.
(Close-up of Mojo, dumbfounded; quick shot of a teller shoveling cash into a bag, then back to him. His eyes turn upward, and we see a stepladder reaching almost to the ceiling, with a magnifying glass hanging nearby. He climbs the ladder for a closer look and finds some tiny writing over his head. Using the glass, he finds these words: "This is A Stick up!"
[This is a reference to Yoko's art exhibit, where John and Yoko first met. John had to climb the ladder and took the magnifying glass hanging from the ceiling and read the word "YES" written on the ceiling. John said something about how if it said "NO", then he would've just left the place.]
Mojo: (hushed, awed) Brilliant! (jumping down, normal tone) Who is responsible for this? Who is behind such a— (Cut to a white-garbed figure at the counter; he continues o.c.) —unique and innovative approach to committing…
(The figure turns around. It is a female monkey, with a pink face and long black fur on her head. Her clothes and hat are entirely white, and she looks as if she might be of Oriental lineage. She holds a banana in one hand.)
[Costume is the same as Yoko Ono's wedding outfit]
Mojo: (his fire gone) …crimes? (He smiles.)
(Alternate between close-ups of the female robber and Mojo four times. The attraction is written all over his face; hers never wavers from is enigmatic smile. Cut to him a fifth time.)
Mojo: I’ve got to get you into my life!
[Lyrical reference the song of the same name from the Revolver album]
(Close-up of the female; she lets loose a scream at eardrum-piercing levels. Back to Mojo.)
[Reference to Yoko Ono's infamous screaming-type singing. Sorry, Yoko!]
Mojo: I love you too!
(The other three Beat Alls, at the front door, watch with some concern.)
"Him": (effeminate voice, clapping claw to forehead) Oh, no!
Mojo: (walking up with female) Hey, guys, this is Moko Jono. She’s a performance criminal, and she’s conceived some brilliant schemes that I think we should try.
[Moko Jono=Yoko Ono, Yoko was a performance artist in the field of Fluxus.]
(The other three trade a very worried look. Dissolve to all five of them—the Beat Alls plus Moko—lying side by side in a king-size bed with a white blanket over them. Mojo’s blue tunic has been replaced by a white one, and his braincap now sports white accents at its base.)
[Parody of John and Yoko's "Bed Peace"]
Fuzzy: Uh…why are we doin’ this again?
Mojo: It’s called "Annoyance Crime #9." Our concept is this. Imagine all the people—
["Annoyance Crime #9" is a parody of the song "Revolution 9" from the White Album, "Imagine all the people" is a lyrical reference to the Lennon song 'Imagine'.]
(Pull back overhead; the bed is in the middle of an intersection, with traffic backed up in all directions. We hear horns honking.)
Mojo: —and how annoyed they’ll be that they can’t reach their destinations on time!
(Close-up of the group. Mojo and Moko laugh at the idea, but the others are not too enthused. Cut to a quick succession of close-ups of the following items on store shelves: eggs, toilet paper, milk, light bulbs, and flour. Each is snatched up and dumped into the quintet’s shopping cart. Side view of them going down a grocery store aisle. Mojo and Moko push the cart while the other three carry armloads of items. We see that Mojo’s cape matches his white tunic.)
Princess: (to Mojo) So tell us again why we’re only stealing toilet paper, light bulbs, milk, flour, and eggs.
Mojo: Well, Moko’s idea is that stealing items that are all white isn’t against the law. So it’s okay to take them.
Princess: Huh?
Mojo: It’s all right ’cause they’re all white!
[I believe this is referring to the white bedroom used in the "Imagine" video. It could also be in reference to the famous "White Album".]
(Princess sighs in disgust, "Him" looks very annoyed, and Fuzzy drops his load. Cut to the city skyline, with a loud, horrendous shrieking noise shredding the air. Two voices are contributing to this aural torture chamber; close-ups reveal the perpetrators to be Mojo and Moko, screaming into each other’s faces. Pull back to show the other Beat Alls covering their ears.)
"Him": (effeminate voice) Mojo!…Mojo! (evil voice) MOJO!!
Mojo: WHAT?!
(Moko continues to scream.)
"Him": (effeminate voice) I STILL DON’T GET IT!
Mojo: THE LOUDER YOU YELL, THE MORE PAIN IT CAUSES THE LISTENERS!
(Six quick shots of people covering their ears are seen, in time with his next six words. The last two shots each show a pair of people who look somewhat like the Beatles.)
[The Beatles are the Yellow Submarine version.]
Mojo: (voice over) AND—THEIR—PAIN—IS—OUR—PLEASURE!! (Back to the group.)
"Him": (evil voice, growling in disgust) MOJO! YOU’RE A PAIN!
Fuzzy: YOU’RE ON YOUR OWN!
Princess: WE QUIT!
Mojo: WHAT?!
Fuzzy, Princess, "Him": WE QUIT!!
Mojo: GOOD, GOOD! BUT EVEN LOUDER!!
(The other three groan and storm off as Mojo resumes his screaming. Camera follows them.)
Fuzzy: Uh—well, now what do we do?
"Him": (effeminate voice, to evil) Let’s get back to where we once belonged.
[Lyrical reference to "Get Back" from the Let it Be album]
(They walk o.c. At home, the hotline begins to buzz. Blossom picks it up; her sisters are hovering behind her on standby.)
Blossom: Yes, Mayor.
(Cut to the Mayor’s office. He is on the hotline. Through the window behind him we see Princess, "Him", and Fuzzy on a rooftop, deploying their respective weapons on the town below. Flames rise toward them.)
Mayor: The Beat Alls are up on the rooftops, and they’re destroying Townsville! They just won’t let it be!
[The rooftop thing is a reference to the Beatles' last live performance on the roof of Apple Corps., "Let it be" is a lyrical reference to the song of the same name off of the album of the same name.]
(Cut back and forth between the bedroom and the office.)
Blossom: (nervously) The…Beat Alls?
Mayor: Well, three of them, at least…Uh, hello?…Girls…Oh…
(Behind him, the girls fly into view and pull Fuzzy’s rock out of his hands. Cut to the rooftop; they confront the trio, the sun silhouetting them.)
Blossom: Hey, Beat Alls!
"Him": (effeminate voice) Why, girls! Hello! (evil voice) GOODBYE!
[Lyrical reference to the single "Hello, Goodbye"]
(He spits a beam, hitting them and pushing them down toward the street.)
Princess: Sorry, but it’s time to go!
[Lyrical reference to the song "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Heart's Club Band (Reprise)" from the Sgt. Pepper album]
(She fires her blaster at them, pushing them down farther.)
Fuzzy: Cry, babies, cry!
[Lyrical reference to "Cry, Baby, Cry" from the White Album]
(He drops a rock on them and connects once again.)
"Him": (effeminate voice) I’d just like to say thank you on behalf of the group and I hope we passed the audition.
[Reference to the Lennon quote which he said after performing on the rooftop of Apple Corps.]
(The three are shocked out of their celebration by Blossom’s arrival at roof level behind them.)
Blossom: (from o.c.) Sorry, guys. (Zoom in quickly on her as Buttercup flies up.)
Buttercup: There’s just— (Bubbles flies up.)
Bubbles: —something missing.
(Back to the three villains.)
Fuzzy: See how they fly? (covering face) I’m crying!
[Lyrical reference to "I Am The Walrus" off of the Magical Mystery Tour album]
(The girls close in.)
Blossom: You sure will be!
(Buttercup takes on Fuzzy, Bubbles thumps Princess, and Blossom makes short work of "Him." Cut to a jail cell, where the three have been deposited in a heap; the door slams shut on them. Pull back to bring the girls into view outside the cell, along with Sergeant Pepper.)
Blossom: They’re going nowhere, man! (The girls take off.)
[Lyrical reference to "Nowhere Man" on the Rubber Soul album.]
(Cut to them in flight.)
Blossom: Three down, one to go! (They fly o.c.)
(Cut to a city street, the camera pointing along the sidewalk. At the far end, a sign is visible, but partially obscured—we see "NNY L NE." Mojo and Moko walk toward the camera, hand in hand, but stop short. Mojo looks up in surprise.)
["NNY L NE"=Penny Lane, the name of a street in Liverpool and a Beatles single]
Mojo: (gasping) Look!
(High overhead, we see a white billboard on the side of a building. It displays four words in huge letters: "BEAT ALLS ARE OVER." Mojo looks frantically around, only to find the same message wherever he turns—even on the front page of the day’s newspaper.)
[Refers to the "War Is Over" billboard that John and Yoko put up all around NYC]
Mojo: Here! There! Everywhere! (uneasily, to Moko) I’ve got a feeling, a feeling deep inside, a feeling I can’t hide. (Close-up; his eyes go wide and he finishes in a small voice.) Oh, no.
["Here, there, and everywhere" is a lyrical reference to a song of the same name from the Revolver album, "I've got a feeling...Oh, no." is a lyrical reference to "I've Got a Feeling" from the Let it Be album.]
(The girls are at the end of the block.)
Girls: Oh, yeah!
Blossom: You’re finished, Mojo, and so are the Beat Alls!
Mojo: I don’t need them! (taking Moko’s hands) Now that I’ve found Moko, our evil shall spread across the universe!
[Lyrical reference to "Across the Universe" from the Let it Be album.]
(Blossom sighs, then turns to call over her shoulder.)
Blossom: (to the tune of "Hey Jude") Hey, Jude!
[Lyrical reference to "Hey Jude" single]
(Behind her, a door opens and a blond woman in a khaki bush shirt and shorts steps out.)
Blond woman: Hi, girls.
Blossom: (to the o.c. Mojo) This is Judy. She’s from the Townsville Zoo.
Mojo: So?
Blossom: Okay, Judy. Do your stuff.
(Judy brings out a "cricket" noisemaker—the kind that makes a sharp clicking sound when you press it with your thumb—and kneels down, snapping away with it.)
Blond woman (Judy): Michelle? Here, girl. Michelle?
[Lyrical reference to the song "Michelle" from the Rubber Soul album]
(She pronounces the name with emphasis on the first syllable and says the "i" as if it was a long "e" as in "need." Close-up of Mojo, quite puzzled by all this.)
Mojo: Michelle? Who’s this Michelle? Moko, do you—
(He screams and recoils in fright; a moment later, we see why—Moko has undergone a remarkable transformation. Her white clothes lie discarded around her on the sidewalk, and the long fur on her head is gone. She is now an ordinary-looking monkey with a little bit of makeup. Moko, a.k.a. Michelle, runs down the block to Judy and the girls, stopping to play with one of Bubbles’ pigtails and making her way to each of the others in turn.)
Bubbles: (giggling) Her name’s Michelle.
Blossom: She lives at the zoo.
Buttercup: And she agreed to help us stop you.
Mojo: (very small voice) Agreed?
(Judy is now holding Michelle.)
Judy: She doesn’t like you or the fact that you’re always destroying Townsville. She said you’re giving monkeys a bad name. (Michelle screeches and chatters angrily.)
Mojo: So…she’s not a performance criminal?
Blossom: Well, I don’t know about "criminal"—
Buttercup: (pointing at Michelle hanging in view overhead) —but she is a performer.
Bubbles: She plays piano!
(Camera turns up to Judy as Michelle pulls herself up and pats the woman’s head.)
Judy: But remember, girls. Someday monkey won’t play piano song, play piano song. See you, girls. (She walks o.c.)
[Lyrical reference to "Michelle"-- If you say "Someday monkey won't play piano song, play piano song." it sounds an awful lot like "Sont les mots qui vont tres bien ensemble, Tres bien ensemble.", which are the real lyrics to the song. Many people miss-heard the lyrics as such.]
Girls: (from o.c.) Bye! (Cut to them.)
Blossom: Now, Mojo, it’s time for a Beat Alls reunion at Townsville Jail!
(The girls in flight; Buttercup is holding Mojo up by his cape.)
Mojo: (dejected) But you took my love away.
[Lyrical reference to "Some Other Guy", a rock song the early Beatles played at the Cavern when they were just getting started.]
Blossom: Well, it’s like the song goes—the love you take is equal to… (She comes up dry and thinks a bit.) Equal…to…oh, who cares? It’s by some dumb old band, anyway. (They fly o.c.)
[Lyrical reference to "The End" from the Abbey Road album]
Narrator: I don’t really want to stop the show, but I thought you might like to know—
[lyrical reference to "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Heart's Club Band (Reprise)" from the Sgt. Pepper album.]
(The standard end shot comes up.)
Narrator: —that once again the day is saved—thanks to the Powerpuff Girls!
(The music strikes a final, resounding chord that slowly dies away.)
[Reference to the ending chord from "A Day in the Life" from the Sgt Pepper album]
