Here we go... I plan to actually update this page, since it isn't anything besides me writing random stuff. Hope you enjoy!

19/05/02
Bloody 'ell, I bitch an awful lot about women, don't I? They really aren't all that bad, or so I've learned. Just as long as you don't look to them romantically. You do that and they tear your heart out. Them or your friends. The way I see it, if you happen to a like a girl, there must be something about her. It's not something unexplainable, there must be something concrete. And your friends, well they share the same interests as you, in most cases. Therefore, if you like something about a girl, then your friends probably do too. And in my case, most of my friends are better than I am. Maybe not in every category but in at least one category that a girl finds important. So whenever I find a girl I like, and she doesn't like me by the time I figure out I like her, odds are she'll be picked up by a friend of mine. So basically I'm screwed romantically. That said, I can have some really good female friends, and that's good enough.

27/03/02
Yes, I know it's been a while, I'm sorry about that. My life has been progressing at a neat pace. Strange actually, but it seems that no matter how far I get in life, everything inevitably comes back to that one thing that I am ultimately terrible at. Relationships. I hate them, but I want so badly that it burns. My passions run through my veins and cause me nothing but pain, because my ration prevents me from acting on them. And yet I believe that I would have more pain in my life if I acted on every whim. That doesn't help me now, though. If I was more passionate, less cold, more human, less scholarly, then perhaps my relationship problems would be less so. Women I'll never understand them. Of course I'll never understand men or beasts, either, so I suppose it's a moot point. I swear, sometimes I don't think I'm human. I feel like I'm just pretending, wearing these skins of falsity. I try to act more like them because it is only proper to do so. But I am not one of them. I am not. I just don't belong. Ah...! I am so pathetic. It's positively shameful.

11/02/02
Wow... I bitch an awful lot. Life really isn't all that bad, if you think about it, and I assure you, I do. Everything happens for a reason, even if it a reason that you don't know or care about. Things may seem terrible, but they could be infinitely worse. I'm smart, I'm young, I'm not a blind sheep. My life could be significantly worse. I could be one of those vapid people, obssessed only with the material and exterior. I could be dumb as a doornail. I could be living in a third world country with not a single opportunity to express myself. That's not to say that things couldn't be better, though. I could be in shape, I could be attractive, I could have a less abrasive personality. But that's the way things generally are. Perfection is not for most men. My path may be unclear, but that does not mean that it is not there.

21/01/02
Just eighteen more weeks than I'm free, but where will I be going after that? Sure, I've been accepted to Rice, but what happens when they find out that I got a C in Calc? I'll probably still get my free ride to Ursinus, though. Hopefully. But let's say that I do got to Ursinus. It's just a college, what graduate school will I go to? My parents won't be willing to pay for me to go to some school that I don't need to go to, and no good school will pay to get a Ursinus graduate. So I'll end up only getting my B.S. in biochem. What the hell will that get me? Nothing. Nowadays you got to have your Master's to get anywhere and any money. And without money, one isn't anything. So I'm pretty much stuck. My weakness of character have led me down the path of corruption and sorrow. I have been unwilling to give up on my lazy ways, despite the pain that they have brought me. So I continue on my downward spiral towards ultimate destruction. Quite a pleasant thought, isn't it? Yes, I may be over-reacting, but I get the feeling that Fate may be giving the reciprocal for all the good luck she's given me in the past. I will find out soon enough, anyway.

20/01/02
You know what... fuck Final Fantasy X. I just picked up Dragon Warrior VII and it rocks! Who needs great graphics when you got a story this cool and a game system this refined. I don't need any of that baggage that comes with the Final Fantasy series these days. I don't need polygons or backgrounds that draw away from the central action or magic that everyone can use! Back in my day, only the various wizards and mages could use magic, and that's the way I like it! I remember in Final Fantasy I you got to pick the class that you wanted your characters to be, and they stuck to it. Sure the non-magic users picked up a few wussy spells once they got to their promoted class, but only White, Black, and, to a lesser extent, Red Wizards could learn the kickass spells. Only they could do the nifty little tricks that everyone thought was cool. And there were no Magic Points, either. I like that, I must admit. Going around with only a limited number that you can cast, that's just nifty. (Part of what I like about Suikoden, as well.) Nowadays, you have every character with a massive aray of spells that its sick. Final Fantasy IX was acceptable in this regard, I must admit. I miss the good old days when you had the fighter, the combat mage, the healer, and the hero character who was a bit of all three. Is that too much to ask? I guess it is, for the Final Fantasy series. Also... what's up with only using three characters? I liked using five! And romantic sub-plots? WTF!? The characters are supposed to live wild, crazy lives, without worrying about such things. (DW VII really drops the ball on this one.) Oh well... anything to make money, I suppose.