It was after I'd given up on trying to explain to the third moron I was NOT asking for an I.O.U. He wasn't about to try and throw me out. I am nothing, if not easily recognized. I am also consistently and visibly armed. He did, however, become extremely unresponsive to my repeated insults.
So I walked out. The dive that I'd been in had kind of a short lane that ran up to it. I guess the owner wanted to be able to get a very good look at everyone who was approaching his establishment. Maybe he wasn't as stupid as the other mounds of evidence suggested. I got to the end of the lane, turned back toward the palace... and there he was. It is totally impossible to NOT notice a large, red-and-blue horse. It had no saddle, no bridle, no nothing. It was also standing in the middle of the street, staring at me. I thought it might be lost from a carnival or something, but I liked the colors. I moved to walk past it, but it turned sideways across the narrow street, partially barring my path. From this viewpoint, it became painfully obvious that "it" was a he.
I stared at it. It looked back at me, then made a horse-noise. I shuffled past him, down the street. I was pursued by a series of clopping noises... which meant that I was indeed being pursued by a red-and-blue horse. I walked a little faster, ignoring it. It kept pace. I wasn't about to run from it, so I turned around. "Hey! Horse!" I shouted, "Quit following me or I'll show you around my personal glue factory." He snorted. He also did not stop following me.
That is when I started to get a little curious... and a little uneasy. People have been known to follow me around. Most of the time, they want to do nasty things to me, when they catch up with me. So I figured I'd take the initiative. It was just a damn horse, anyway.
I strode up to it. It stood its ground and snorted at me again. It tossed its head, then shook its mane. I extended my hand. It did not move to bite it. I gingerly placed my palm on its forehead. There was no violent reaction. Good. I pressed. It pressed back. "Go away!" I said, pressing harder. Strange as it may seem, I'd never engaged a "normal" horse in a pushing contest before, so I didn't know how close they come to Amberite strength. I figured I'd have to be able to out push a normal horse.... so I put my back into it. It did the same. Hard. I switched positions, and braced my shoulder against its chest. It made another horse noise and refused to budge. I strained several sets of muscles, but nothing. Then IT STARTED PUSHING ME! My boots lost their purchase on the cobblestones and I started sliding forward. The stallion then took the opportunity to kick forward slightly. I was suddenly back on my feet, staggering.
It was starting to scare me. If it could push me, it could probably whip my ass all over this place. If it could do that, it couldn't be from around here. That's when I figured it out: it had to be a chaosite. "Okay," I thought, "Don't panic. It seems to be either acting the horse part, or very stupid." I decided to go in the direction of the palace, following a very populated route - just in case it was waiting 'til it got me somewhere isolated.
To make a long story short, it continued passively following my all over the city. I went through the main palace gate, into the grounds... it kept going. I went through Benedict's gardens... still there. I went up the walkway to the main door... and it was still there. If it was going to be stupid enough to follow me all the way into the palace, well... that would be that. I'd get credit for capturing the stupidest chaosite since the one that started the war in the first place. I opened the door. "After you." It shook its head. "Ok," I said, "If you want me to lead you to the slaughter... you don't look like a lamb, but we can do it that way."
I walked in. It followed, still shaking its head. It looked amused. I should have figured it out, but I just thought it had to be stupid. I walked straight between the main guards. They did the bulging-eyes/dropped-jaws bit. "It's ok, boys. I've got a delivery here, for Benedict." With that, I cast a long glance back at the horse and chuckled. It did a horse-laugh.
Benedict was usually upstairs, training somebody or doing tai chi, or some such martial-type shit. So I headed up the stairs. I'd only gotten up one flight, when I passed Random, on the way down. He did a double take, then gave me that exasperated look I'd seen on his face, during my childhood. "Chetwin. There is a horse behind you. Why did you bring a horse into the palace?" He sighed. "Just get it out of here, before it shits on the steps."
I replied, "Actually, sire. I believe it is a would-be chaosite assassin. The dumbest one on record." He furrowed his brow. "No... Chet... I think it's just a horse." I told him that it could push me. He still wasn't convinced.
That's when Aidan walked by. He started laughing his scrawny, probably-unwashed ass off. I will simply give you the ensuing conversation, to the best of my memory:
"That's a hellmare, Chetwin. Why did you bring it in here?" he said.
"It followed me... and it's a stallion," I said.
"It's a generic term. It's a hellmare."
"Oh... how the hell do you know?"
"My mother made them."
"Well... why is it here?"
"Apparently, he has chosen you as his rider."
"Oh."
That's enough of that conversation. We argued back and forth for a while, until Random ordered me to take "my horse" to the stables. I stood there, looking at him. Aidan had told me that I would have to name him, since he was one of the ones that did not come equipped with one. I went through all the captains of industry (J.P. Morgan, etc) until I found one that did not make him grimace. Thus, I present Carnegie of Amber."
