A Tunnels and Trolls® play-by-post adventure run by khara_khang
"My hero?" she sobs, lowering her head. Her only hope of rescue seemingly gone with Quickly.
What bout me? Never mind. Don't answer that.
As Ocullos dives for the key, ... his luck is cut short as Ssu's spear strikes downward, timed almost perfectly to his dash for the key.
Should've expected that....
Captain Jelsee tries to speak, but his body will not obey him as the spider venom takes full control of him. Captain Jelsee can do nothing but watch in horror at what he knows is about to happen.
Stupid arrows....
The guardian Warrior lowers its wickedly designed cutting weapon to Ocullos' neck and easily removes the Leprechaun's head from his body and holds it up for the captain to see. Watching the gory scene of blood spraying from Ocullos' body, the captain can do nothing but stare in shock, as does Ocullos' lifeless head.
Classic stuff. Almost as good as when Amroth died, but what happens to Winky?
"Well you really did it this time. You gave people your vulnerable, sexy and dangerous look, all in one, and they fell for it. Yes! It worked! Your first day, that's impressive! You should be very proud of yourself...."
DAMN! Just what I said from the start.... Oh well, that's what's fun about RPG: you can do the insane stuff and find out what happens.
And the moral of the story is:
"Never dive under a four armed creature named Ssu, to save someone that doesn't even want you to be their hero."
Quickly is a wreck. He is wracked with guilt for the abandonment of a comrade (and he was so sure the Leprechaun could Wink-Wing out of there!) and a fair damsel to boot, and wracked with pain from his near mortal wound. Upon exiting the portal, he banks up and into cover with his bow drawn and ready. Should a target of opportunity appear, he will try to recoup some of his ruined honor by plugging it.
Jax plows through the portal ahead of his better judgment. Instantly, he reappears in a dense dark jungle, full of sounds, scents and stifling heat. There are no traces of the minions, the Mummy or even Shipy on HotVision™. His head still spinning from the trip, Jax steps aside from the portal.
Just then, several figures burst through the portal and scatter noisily, some leaving residual heat-footprints in the damp soil. The minions!? He'd followed them in! Jax's insincts punch through his confusion and he begins to track one of the minion's trails before it fades into the ambient.
Not more than a minute later, and unseen by Jax, two more figures pop into existence on the near side of the portal. Jax may not have paid them much heed but for one jungle-rending curse.
In Yithian.
The sounds of a desperate struggle punctuate even the din of the jungle insects, but Jax doesn't need more incentive to double back. A Dracon is in trouble, and as such, his priorities undergo an instantaneous shift.
With the alacrity of reflexes that earned him his nickname, Jax unsheathes his EverSharp™ blade even as he barrels toward Taran's heat signature. His sword flashes through the jungle in front of him, more a natural extension of his swordarm than a weapon to be wielded. Something has pounced atop his brother; it doesn't show up on HotVision™, but he can tell it is pinning him down and raking him viciously.
In a moment, Jax is upon the fell minion. He swings to behead.
You meant to write "friend," right? Fiend, friend, what's the difference?!
I meant to write "fiiend" [sic], actually.
Hmmm... so much for planning ahead.
If we don't know what we're doing, the enemy surely cannot anticipate our actions. ;)
Groveling proved that it is a two way portal.
Good point.
Ssu puts one of its feet on Ocullos' back to hold the Leprechaun still. One of its four arms reaches down and takes Ocullos by the hair of the head to pull his head up a little.
No chance of him Wink-Winging out?
"Stop Ssu! Don't kill him!" says Captain Jelsee, but the only sound which comes from the captain's paralyzed mouth is an unrecognizable mumble.
Dang, if he didn't want him killed, why summon Ssu, or not say something when he summoned it?
Almost as good as when Amroth died, but what happens to Winky?
I believe khara wrote that all your possessions were taken for the ship.
"Are you really called Dandelion?"
"No, I'm not, and I don't know who this... Damn-lion... is."
I know who Prince Thalion is, but that's neither here nor there.
And the moral of the story is:
Never give a sucker an even break?
"Never dive under a four armed creature named Ssu, to save someone that doesn't even want you to be their hero."
It'll never catch on.
[Quickly] was so sure the Leprechaun could Wink-Wing out of there!
I was hoping the same. Ah well.
With the alacrity of reflexes that earned him his nickname....
I was wondering why they call you GrappleJax!
Since Taran wisely (foolishly?) stashed his belongings in the adventurers' quarters, he is without his backpack full of goodies and magic shield. Luckily, he keeps his Get Out of Trouble™ token in his pants pocket. The only other thing unmentioned is his rain parka. Is it possible he put it on, and he had his crossbow and sword strapped on the outside of his parka? GM call, I guess. He bought the parka for use above deck, and he was heading that way after stashing his gear, so it makes sense that he had it with him, if not worn.
Parka or no parka, hopefully the shipmates will be kind enough to FedEx Taran's stuff back to Dracon Warren. Maybe they can use the same Unicorn carrier that was used back in Khazan to deliver Jack's Ca'juun (the Blackened) sword back to the BFT. (Fifty bonus points for anyone who remembers that short-lived adventure in which Jax was saved from drowning by his ever-stinkin' brother Taran. I thought it appropriate to bring that up in light of our current sea-based adventure, heh-heh!)
As he struggles with the awful monster, Taran is thankful for his armor. Barely tarnished in his last adventure, his armor now finds itself quite useful as it is scratched and clawed mercilessly. Despite the armor, Taran still feels the pain!
Finding himself underneath the humanoid with the dry-leafy innards, Taran attempts to kick away the awful being and regain his footing. He has to dispatch this creature quickly so he can save his brother from rushing headlong into overwhelming danger....
How many hits does his lamellar take? I have 10*2 on my char sheet for some reason....
Just so it's known: that bit I said about me thinking khara likes to kill me off whatever I say was meant as a joke. Yeah, I think I need to work on those jokes. But then again, I asked for it; I thought my guy could make a Lv5 DEX SR.... Stupid auto-fails!
I don't know if khara likes to kill you, but the rest of us take immense joy in watching you get killed.
As far as your comment being a joke: my error. It's hard to tell online sometimes. I've heard it rumored that I myself am sometimes misinterpreted. Fancy that.
I was wondering why they call you GrappleJax!
Maybe they can use the same Unicorn carrier that was used back in Khazan to deliver Jack's Ca'juun (the Blackened) sword back to the BFT. (Fifty bonus points for anyone who remembers that short-lived adventure in which Jax was saved from drowning by his ever-stinkin' brother Taran....)
Heheh, eickeric probably realizes that I was referring to Jax's "BlurBlade" nickname.
Here's a historybite: "GrappleJax" was coined by none other than our favorite hairfoot Shipy in the "Ca'juun the Blackened Sword" adventure mentioned by tarandracon (wherein Jax used his grappling hook in a (failed) attempt to entangle some foes). Unfortunately, this unfinished adventure was lost in The Great Website Holocaust™ of '00. This loss was one of the catalysts that inspired the creation of the Archives.
How many hits does his lamellar take? I have 10*2 on my char sheet for some reason....
A full suit of lamellar armor, as Taran has, takes 10 hits, but when armor is worn by a Warrior, its defensive capacity is doubled. Hence, sans shield, Taran can absorb 20 hits; the minion therefore delivers only 1 hit of damage off his CON.
I don't know if khara likes to kill you, but the rest of us take immense joy in watching you get killed.
I do it just for you guys....
As far as your comment being a joke: my error. It's hard to tell online sometimes.
Yeah, that sarcastic tone is something that is hard master in type, although sitting around at the BFT long enough, one learns that most people are being sarcastic.
Jack, not having a particularly good sense of meta-game time acts out of turn and with none of Jax's alacrity. "Mmm, Mmm! Rumble in the jungle! I'm so bad, I make medicine sick!"
Without much to take his cues from, he falls upon any remaining minions, swinging not so much to behead but out of bad habit and lascivious promiscuity. Er... or not.
"Shippo! You out there somewhere?"
The only other thing unmentioned is his rain parka. Is it possible he put it on, and he had his crossbow and sword strapped on the outside of his parka? GM call, I guess.
I would say Taran would have it on if he had his sword on his belt, but the Archives state he has his uncle's broadsword and scabbard strapped on his back. I'd venture he didn't have his parka on. He left it belowdecks.
...hopefully the shipmates will be kind enough to FedEx Taran's stuff back to Dracon Warren.
The outlook is doubtful. If you don't retrieve it, it's likely that others will find it and sell it for quick cash.
Hence, sans shield, Taran can absorb 20 hits; the minion therefore delivers only 1 hit of damage off his CON.
Note also that for every point of damage that exceeds your armor, your armor takes that in actual damage itself. In this case, Taran's armor took a 1 point deduction in damage. Since the armor bonus is doubled for Warriors, Taran's lamellar armor that could protect him from 20 hits of damage now can only protect him from 18.
The undead fiend falls upon Taran with an animal-like fury insatiable by anything short of Taran's joining it in Death's cold embrace. Its wicked razor-sharp claws rake Taran savagely: they dig grooves into Taran's lamellar armor and find the soft flesh beneath it. By the looks of it, the creature could have just climbed up from a grave. Its appearance is nauseating and its claws are likely as disease ridden as its lifeless body smells. In the faint moonlight, the undead minion's eyes glow like twin pearls, but their stare is not beautiful: it is a ghastly stare, hell-sent and singlemindedly fixed on seeking death for anyone who opposes it, and in the most gruesome way possible.
Jax moves up from behind as the scene of the struggle unfolds. It is clear the undead has Taran pinned to the ground and he isn't likely to break free from a creature so intent on seeking his death. Only the faint moonlight and the blood on the minion's claws let Jax see his target, which seems all but invisible to his HotVision™. His brother is very different: Taran's form shines with bright vivid colors in sharp detail, and the fresh blood which oozes from Taran glows like venting lava on HotVision™. In one quick swipe, Jax removes the head of the minion while at the same time making a tossed salad out of the underbrush. The undead creature disappears in a puff of dust like some Buffy the Vampire Slayer rerun. The death struggle ends in a whimsical poof.
One by one, each member of the group emerges from the portal, except for Ocullos. Between the points of entrance and exit, passage through the portal causes a dazzling kaleidoscope-like effect that confuses and overwhelms the senses. Quickly is the last to exit the portal as it snaps shut. The group is left standing in the oppressive heat of a thick jungle roughly 3,273 miles from their last location.
All of you hear a noise and as it gets louder, a single male human bursts from the jungle into the light cast by Jack's lantern. He is in his late twenties and has a coil of rope on one hip and a sheathed sword on the other. He has nothing in his hands. He looks at you as he bends over, breathing very heavily.
"Hi people, 'bout frakkin' time you got here! My name is Martek the Swamp Rat, but of course, you already know that, right?" Martek catches his breath and notices Jax and Taran. "By Grabthar's Hammer, it's the Orc brothers, Larry and Moe...." He looks around.
"I betcha thinkin' déjà vu in the worst possible sense! Ya haven't seen Curly 'round, have ya? He's about yay-high," he motions about his height, "with beady eyes, nappy ears, weird actin', wormy lookin'?"
He looks at Jack. "Hiya Jack, how could I ever forget that progressive stance tempered with a conservative soul? Shouldn't ya'll be in some bar with less than sober faculties spouting obscene pretenses?" Martek takes a few steps to leave, his breathing back to normal. "Ya'll comin'?" He looks around again as if being chased, and notices RuntRock is missing from the group.
What do you do?
Ebony, feeling disoriented, isn't sure that her ears are working properly. Did the guy running out of the jungle just recognize the Orcs? This gets worse by the moment. Nervous, she begins suspecting that this is all a very elaborately planned hoax to get them all (or at least the ones that the planner wants dead) into one place.
She stands silently and observes, weapon still at the ready.
Out of nowhere, a familiar Elf is teleported above the party. Luckily it is right above Jay, so Amroth has plenty of pad on which to fall.
"Ugh, that Wizard needs to improve his aim," he says under his breath. Then he looks down on his "fallen" comrade. "Well Jay, nice to see you again. And don't say you don't know me! Thanks for the landing, old buddy, ol' pal!"
Amroth gets up and dusts himself off. "Martek, where did you go? We have to get going and get that thing done for Grutoss, so don't go wandering off on me now, you hear! Well, if it isn't the ever-resilant Orc brothers, saving Khazan one frak at a time. Hello, Ratcatcher. I believe we met briefly in the Blue Frog. Hey ol' jiggly-bones Jack! It looks like you're all here.
"I guess my friend [Ocullos --ed.] never showed up, eh? Well, once I get the chance, he'll be wishing he was rotting in hell! And where's Shipppy [sic]? Well, we should get going. Fall into ranks!" With this, Amroth points to a direction and starts walking, humming a tune.
This post was made with contributions by Khara Enterprises.
Suddenly, just as Taran was about to open up his last-resort can of whoop-ass on this ghastly fiend, the creature's eyes widen momentarily as its head is discombobulated. It then crumbles into dust, leaving Taran seemingly alone.
If not for his brother's unmistakable smell, Taran might have wondered to what or whom he owes his stroke of good fortune, but as his nostrils are in fine working order despite the humidity, Taran lies his head back and collapses momentarily, eyes closed, calm. "Thanks, my ever-stinkin' bro. I guess interrogation is out of the question now, heh?" he says to his invisi-bro, laughing. He holds out a hand, which is grasped, and he is then pulled to his feet. "Ouch," he says as he finally realizes that he is bleeding. Then Martek arrives.
"By Grabthar's Hammer, it's the Orc brothers, Larry and Moe...."
Taran nods at Martek, learning that it doesn't pay to be surprised at turns of events which include his adventuring past and supprting cast. Then Amroth shows up, and Taran throws his hands in the air, resigning himself to being completely confused after all.
"Frak! Martek? Amroth? Who's next, Lilac and her Rhino?" Taran confronts Martek directly. "The names are Taran and Jax. Who're Larry and Moe anyway?" Taran snorts. "What's going on? Last time you showed up to crash our mission, I ended up a buck-naked prisoner in a swamp." Taran pauses, finger pointed accusingly, as he recalls the memories of his time under lock and chain, and wonders where Domina might be, whips, chains and all.
"Anyways, before we go chasing you, we're all getting paged, right here and now!"
"I think my brother means we all need to get on the same page." He sighs.
Taran, still pointing his finger accusingly, and not missing a beat, continues, "Right, what he said! Spill the beans!" Taran looks around briefly at the re-assembled party, noticing that he's not the only one who's wondering what's going on.
Here I've assumed that at some point Taran and Jax make their way back to the portal, and that Jax takes off his cloak of invisibility, such that Martek sees them both and recognizes them.
"Hiya Jack, how could I ever forget that progressive stance tempered with a conservative soul?"
"Well, as much fun as it's always been running around in the wake of your oh-so-unique 'odure de jour,' I might hesitate for a moment. We are after all here looking for Shipy. Are you taking us to him?"
As Martek and Amroth appear, Quickly covers them with his bow until they prove not to be enemies. He nods, tightlipped, at Amroth and goes back to scanning the brush, watching where Ebony isn't. Meanwhile, he mutters between clenched teeth, steadily, to nobody in particular: "How long does it take to Wink-Wing, anyhow? You said, 'Don't go for the key,' so I didn't go for it, so what was your plan already? Where are you, Leprechaun? He had to get out of there. He must have gotten out."
As the minutes pass, he falls silent and keeps his watch.
Here I've assumed that at some point Taran and Jax make their way back to the portal, and that Jax takes off his cloak of invisibility, such that Martek sees them both and recognizes them.
I too assumed this. I doubt Jax would be standing around invisible while talking to Taran. As far as making your way back, Taran was never more than 15 feet away from where the portal opened. The battle was over by the time the rest of the group arrived, then Martek arrived minutes later.
After dispatching Taran's attacker and helping his brother to his feet, Jax decloaks off Taran's starboard bow. "Hurry, we don't have much time before the minions' tracks dissipate!"
But Jax and Taran don't get far before a light shines from behind them, ruining their HotVision™. "Frak it, T, we're never going to track them now." It's the others, and so Jax and Taran double back. Quickly just makes it through before the portal pops out of existence. In the light of Jack's lantern, Jax notices Ocullos is missing.
"Ocullos didn't make it," he states the obvious.
A sudden commotion nearby causes him to whirl around, blade still drawn and ready. Then Martek bursts into the hemisphere of illumination.
"Fewmets...." Jax mutters, lowering his scimitar.
"By Grabthar's Hammer, it's the Orc brothers, Larry and Moe...."
"'By Grabthar's Hammer'? Where'd he get that...." Jax thinks. He knows Martek from a past adventure [cf. Lizardmen in Red Water Bay --ed.], a jarring jaunt through time and space that he evidently experienced countless times with Martek, and more often than not with fatal results. He only remembers one time stream---his reality---but Martek did demonstrate that he somehow remembers many more. Did Martek pick that vow up from him, like he picked up the word "frak," or is it vice versa? He has his suspicions: who the frak was Grabthar anyway?---no respectable Orc would be caught using a blunt weapon. It is yet another mystery he mentally files under "M".
"Ya haven't seen Curly 'round, have ya? He's about yay-high, with beady eyes, nappy ears, weird actin', wormy lookin'?"
Out of nowhere, a familiar Elf is teleported above the party.... "Martek, where did you go? We have to get going and get that thing done for Grutoss, so don't go wandering off on me now, you hear! Well, if it isn't the ever-resilant Orc brothers, saving Khazan one frak at a time."
"Martek. Curly."
"Right, what he said! Spill the beans!"
Before Martek can oblige Taran, Jax fills him in, on the off chance that he (or any of the others) doesn't know. "Martek, Shipy was kidnapped by a powerful Mummy Wizard who escaped into the jungle several minutes ago, but the heat-trails of his minions who followed are already growing cold. If you know where they are headed, then lead the way."
He turns to Taran and the others. "If, as Amroth implies, Lerotra'hh's Master Wizard Grutoss is indeed in on this, then I suggest we defer any explanations for later. I will personally vouch for Martek's integrity. I'm sure he will 'page us' when there is time to spare."
Jax nods to Martek and moves to follow him.
Quickly sets his teeth, improvises a bandage out of his clothes to deal with the gaping rent in his chest and follows Jax.
Ebony is not comfortable with the situation. Oh goodie, an Orc vouches for him. Gee, why don't I feel better? As the group begins to move, she moves near Quickly.
"Are you alright? The wound looks pretty bad."
Olvarin stands gaping in confusion at the two newcomers and the incomprehensible dialogue going on between them and the Orcs.
When Ebony asks after Quickly's health, the Elf healer blinks and snaps back to his senses. Tracing the wound with his fingers, the Elf heals Quickly as good as new. Now he turns to the slightly wounded Orc, intending to do likewise.
Olvarin will be down 2 STR. Can I get a countdown in later posts so I know when I am recovering STR points?
Quickly is doing the clenched-teeth thing.
"Are you alright?"
"No."
"The wound looks pretty bad."
"Yes."
Tracing the wound with his fingers, the Elf heals Quickly as good as new.
"Whoof!" He feels the rush of new health going from his no-longer-lacerated chest right to his head. As soon as he can, he nods sharply to Olvarin and Ebony to indicate thanks. He re-sets his jaw, tests his bowstring, and falls in after the Orc.
Megol finishes lighting his torch just after the man falls out of the sky. He is completely dazed: crazy men with ropes, people falling out of the sky. This is too much for a disgruntled Leprechaun. The confused midget charges forward and smacks Amroth on the back of the head and then dashes away singing, "We represent the lollipop guild...."
Even in the darkness of the exotic oppressively humid jungle, there is enough light radiating from Jack's hooded lantern to see the haunting features of each person as they stand together, some in disbelief at the chance encounter, others in dazed wonderment of who is who and how the hell they came to know each other in the first place. At the same time, whimsical shadows created by the light play upon every bush and leaf around them like demons dancing in the pale moonlight.
Martek smiles at Ebony for a moment before reality reminds him of the situation. Ebony shoots Martek back an exasperated stare. Martek just looks at her, but he doesn't respond. He turns his head to look at the others. As nice as the moment seems, there isn't time for a reunion with Jack and the Orc bothers, nor time to spend lollygagging about. Reality is very fluid and changes from moment to moment. Brutis, Martek's rope attached to his hip, moves like a living snake and vainly attempts to point back in the direction from which Martek just came. Martek notices Brutis but also tries to ignore it. The mystical rope holds an intelligence far beyond what anyone would ever expect.
Martek lets out a frustrated noise. "Mwa crash your mission? Why ya worryin', Moe---er Taran. Yer not naked now? But we do have a passel of Sea Elves boot-footin' this way. How come I'm not afraid?"
"Fear accompanies the possibility of death. Calm shepherds its certainty."
"See, now that's why I always love hangin' with ya, Jax.
"With great power comes great responsibility. I just wish I had a wee bit of both." Martek looks around, shrugging at Amroth's appearance and motioning for him to take the lead.
"Let's go make the people from the Building Of Magical Urban Development proud while someone is still vouching for us." Martek sniffs himself and then grins at Jack. "Death is the main course. All this is the appetizer, Bones."
Jack looks at Martek with annoyance. "I hope you're smarter than you look!"
Martek looks at Jack, his eyebrows high and a look of amusement on his face. "That would be easy." He grins.
Quickly seems lost with the fact that Ocullos apparently didn't Wink-Wing out of the captain's cabin. It was his rescue plan after all. It isn't hard for Quickly to remember exactly what Ocullos was facing when he abandoned the Leprechaun to save himself. The rest of it is a terrible blur, but he feels the guilt of whatever transpired after his departure squarely upon his tiny shoulders. No one really answers any of Quickly's questions after the portal closes behind him. Whatever fate has befallen Ocullos, he alone can surmise.
Preceding guilt trip is included free!
As out of the loop as Olvarin is, he wastes little time in healing Quickly's wounds. Speaking a short incantation, and making a few somatic movements, he ushers forth healing energies that cause all of Quickly's wounds to disappear, fading like a bad nightmare, leaving only torn clothing and the drying blood as a stark reminder of how fragile life is. He similarly heals Taran of his slight wound.
Megol purses his lips and lets out a long breath. He mutters. "God, at least we're not dead." As he hears those words out loud, he laughs bitterly. There seems to be a little too much truth in them.
Megol's torch adds even more light as well as more shadows, albeit pushing them back farther, but they are still there.
Amroth and Martek confer in a few hushed whispers and then both head off into the jungle leading the group.
What do you do?
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