Mood:  caffeinated

Merry Christmas, or Happy Holidays if you prefer.

Another year is coming up and this one has been better than I expected to be, received a phone call from Mike's mom this past Wednesday. We talked for two hours about him and our life together in general, was refreshing to confide in her. The person who knows him well but won't cover spots like friends will.

She's not doing so great, but it's the season for sickness, she just needs to be extra careful.

No gaming, too busy, but maybe after the New Year we will, but my Side Quest to bring Aiyana back is finally bearing fruition, but I don't want it to over take the campaign.

Christmas was backwards this year, for as long as I remember, Christmas Eve was always spent with the Lassiter side of the family, while Christmas Morning was spent with my parents and Christmas afternoon spent with my mom's side. This year my mom's side got together on Christmas Eve at my grandpa's house, Mike played hookie while my dad's side celebrated on the 23rd, which I missed all together because my dad never informed me.

Mike I got gift cards, money, junk food, and movie tickets.

Mike got shirts from my grandma and 2 DVD's from me. (The Bourne Supremacy and Spider Man 2).

I got a fancy leather jacket, and a CD from Mike Enigma's Greatest Hits.

From mom I got two "motivational books" that so far seem a very subtle way to preach religion..which is odd, as my mom is not religious. She also got me a cool candle holder that's on a dragon foot, balancing a dragon's egg, with cool designs that when a candle is in side, shows details not there before. Also got a purple Dragon holding a sword that serves as a Letter opener. Grandma gave me a night shirt and a sweater.

I think that's about it besides loading up on food, sparkling cider and Egg nog lol!

Will add more when I remember more!

Be safe everyone!

Mood:  a-ok

Originally posted on December 15th, 2004

Life is Decently smooth.

I called Grandpa today. Today is his birthday, he's 78. Said I love you and like always I meant it. he may be be a hard man, but he deserves to hear it and I don't think he hears it often anymore.

However I will not dwell on subjects that depress me.

There is an opening on his street for a house, so we are looking into that.

We got our car but money is tight, I got Mike a present, two actually, but it looks like neither of us can afford much us because I still must pay for groceries this month, so things will be thin.

Which reminds me that coming home from shopping Saturday, I saw the most beautiful rainbow, it was big, faint but so luminous. Truly one of the most beautiful things I've seen in my young life, and hope to see one of that vast beauty again one day.

Still in no mood to work on the website, truly Vesz'aun has been stolen again, and along with that that yesterday I found my first char's name was stolen. Anyone know what to do about this? If so, let me know, it is becoming a great concern of mine.

Mike and I watched Earthsea to relax. It was an okay movie, Willow is still better though, afterwords we went to bed but we ended up making love, to which has put me in this state of mind and calm. It was slow and deeply felt between us both. Mike's moves were much different than other times. He was very slow, tender but so careful, it complimented my mood well.

Today was pretty mellow otherwise, I hope the rest of this week flows like that as well.

Oops 12:01 am..now it's dad's birthday. I need to call him later today, I just hope he'll be home, he needs an I love you as well.

Dunno when I'll write again, so happy non denominational holiday to any who may read this!

Mood:  chillin'

Originally posted on November 29th, 2004

Been over a month since my last entry, but why bore anyone with the same shit everyday right?

Stress is piling up because of the holidays. Thanksgiving is passed but Christmas is coming up fast, so is rent by the 1st..

Been over a year since I had this blog, pretty spiffy. One day I'll go back and reread my dull life. Finally had sex on Sunday, after three weeks of none, feel better but still not enough to really work on the site yet.

Mike bought snore strips, I'm very surprised and very pleased that they actually work.

Role play has been slow too, but as I said stress is building, but I'm thankful that yet another year has gone by and Mike and I are still together, that's what matters to me.

Until next update, may we all stay healthy during the cold season!

Mood:  hungry

Originally posted on September 27th, 2004

Had sex on the 22nd, but there is a storm brewing on the home front, just waiting for Mike to explode again.

He's bitching about gaming again and turning into a junkie for EQ, it's irritating, plus he keeps staying up too damn late.

I'm really giving thought to letting him go, just waiting to see what his next major outburst will be like. I'm not happy with the idea, but it might be the best for him. I'm screwed though, so I hope if we do break up he'll help find me a place to live.

Sure I love him, but I'm now beginning to see and not pretend that the relationship is going stale. He's so tired, unmotivated, never wants to go out, I have to nag him about that and he's still acting like I'm the selfish one. What's selfish about wanting to get out after spending all day indoors, sometimes all week? All he hears is I wanna game, half the time I don't but he's made commitments to the players, and unlike him I plan to keep them even if I don't want to.

Oh well, we'll see how things go. I just wish he'd listen more instead of what he wants to hear whether it be good or bad.

Mood:  a-ok

Originally posted on October 12th, 2004

Since my last entry, the day after we fought, so I ignored him, seemed to effect him cause he asked where I put my ring and even put it back on. Now things seemed calmed over, even had sex two times since my last entry. The most recent was last night.

No gaming and no commissions for 2 weeks, going through withdrawl.

Went shopping yesterday, spent too much, but hopefully we are doing okay money wise, we need a car badly, but I hope he doesn't put it off.

Mom might get her own apartment by the end of the month, so things might go smoother if such is the case.

For Christmas this year, I think I'll suggest going up to see his family, provided work will let him.

All in all it was a good weekend!

Mood:  chillin'

Originally posted on Setember 14th, 2004

Not much to update, been busy on the site and playing EQ.

RPed some too, no sex though sucks.

Jurty is working on one of my commissions is looking good!

Marta, I don't know what's up, she finished it looks breathtaking but I haven't received corrections.

Conked my head last week, had a concussion mildly worried Mike to no end, it was really sweet. Hurt until recently. All better now.

Miss going outside.

Miss sex.

Update done, see ya when I have something else interesting to say!

Mood:  a-ok

Originally posted on August 30th, 2004

Been doing a lot of web work, and RPing, kinda. I say kinda because players have been running Mike ragged. I hope he doesn't get stressed too much and snap at me because he feels "pressured".

He had fun though, so it worked out good, because that's what I like to see in him, fun. Just hopes he washes clothes soon he he!

No word on any more commissions yet.

We had good sex yesterday, the kind where bodies are sync'Sync. Mmmmmmmmmmm....

I love him!

Think that's about it, not much else bears mentioning, like this to be a happy entry.

Mood:  lazy

Originally posted on August 24th, 2004

Tired so this will probably be a short entry.

Our boards are finally picking up and Mike is finally back into gaming, so we've been RPing up a storm which is good.

I should start doing more web work. My survey paid off and is finally getting the DM ideas and the players to open up, so Mike doesn't have to think of everything.

FINALLY got that commission from Kay and WOW! Well worth the wait, it was a masterpiece, but as usual players want their characters in on it, oh well. Chase is the only one that actually gave word on another artist and offered to pay for something, so can't help feeling that some players are leeching off what took me some time to research. I also feel some might be jealous, simply given the reactions received, but at least most did say it was good.

Last Wednesday, me and Mike watched a friend of his play at Mic night. It was pretty good, he couldn't sing but he damn sure could play the guitar. Others were good too, some had written their songs, Truly talented. Best part is, I got out of the house and Mike got to mingle and have beer.

I'm on my period and we've not had sex for a week, but the good far out weighs the bad..Whoo Hoo!

Mood:  cheeky

Originally posted on August 13th, 2004

Just to report that we had sex Monday, but then I got Sick Tuesday and just got better today. So been a lousy week.

No gaming so I hope we do soon, been a month for me, craving it like sex and chocolate!

Playing EQ again. No word on commissions yet.

That's all for now!

Mood:  don't ask

Originally posted on July 31st, 2004

Only thing to report is that we had good sex, just yesterday but we've been fighting most of the month. Irritated with him right now. Dunno if we'll game, oh well, short entry because no point in dragging out why he's irritating me, MAYBE tomorrow will be better.

It's why I've not written much this Month.