A hand on her shoulder interrupted Annalesa's thoughts. Then she heard Jack's voice.
"Annalesa? Are you ok?" She turned to face him.
"Why does everyone think that Jack? You did, Spot does, who's to say none of the others do?"
"Oh Annalesa...I'm so sorry. You've got ta believe me...I don't think dat. I nevah did. I was just angry."
"At who?"
"Myself. Angry because I hadn't been a bettah friend ta you and then you were leavin. And because I didn't want ya ta leave."
Annalesa was confused. First he hated her, then he was her friend but nothing special, now they were sitting on the front steps of a newsboys lodging house and he was telling her that he wanted her to stay?
"I don't understand..."
"Look ya just got ta believe me...I don't quite know what ta think of ya. I like ya, I really do. It's just dat none of us is accustomed ta havin a goyl around all da time, ya know? And I was...gettin kinda used ta it."
Jack couldn't bring himself to tell her how he really felt, so he ended his little speech rather lamely. She didn't say anything, just looked at him all confused with the tear tracks still fresh on her face. Her eyes were puffy and her nose was red but Jack thought nobody had ever been so beautiful. He wanted so badly to reach out and brush a curl that had dropped out of her ponytail back behind her ear but he didn't. Instead he said
"Don't get too upset. All da guys like ya. Dey really do. Spot's just...well he's Spot. Dat was probably some sort a test or somethin. And I promise ya passed." Jack started to laugh softly.
"I ain't nevah seen him look so surprised."
Annalesa looked at him for a moment and then smiled.
"I guess he wasn't expecting that, was he?"
"No, he wasn't. I'm just glad ya didn't do dat ta me!"
"Jack?" She was looking at the ground but when he looked over at her she looked at him and put her hand on his arm and clasped it for a moment.
"Yeah?"
"Thank you." Jack didn't know what to say...he hadn't done anything special. So he just smiled.
"You're welcome. Now come on...we hafta clean da house before da party...newsie Christmas tradition."
"Let's go." Annalesa smiled and walked into the house.
For the rest of the day the newsies cleaned the Lodging House from top to bottom...every counter, every bed, every floor, and every window. Some of the younger boys even got really ambitious and tried to clean the ceiling by standing on bunk beds. All day Annalesa watched Jack. How could she have never noticed him before? She had always thought he was good looking but now she saw something other than that...a quality that he had about him. Even through the street tough façade there was a gentleness that was unmistakable. Annalesa remembered seeing him staring into space and dreaming and realized that this was what she had seen in his eyes then...this side that he didn't dare show openly but that she could now see quite clearly.
Likewise, Jack was watching Annalesa. He wanted so badly to go up to her and just tell her how he felt but something was holding him back. She was so distant sometimes...he'd hear her sigh and when he looked at her she'd be staring at the floor or the sky. Even when she smiled there was something behind it...a hesitation almost. It was almost as if she had to think about smiling before she actually did. But she was so confident...he saw it in every move she made. That assured look she had about her never changed. She looked as if she could take on an army and not flinch. Except...except that night when she left and this morning on the steps. Her shell had cracked and she'd been hurt. He felt an overwhelming need to know that part of her, the part she hid from everyone else.
Once Annalesa caught Jack staring at her and she smiled and went back to her work. Maybe he does feel it...no Annalesa he couldn't possibly. You barely even know him! But maybe...
Annalesa was almost finished getting ready for the party. Since all of her dresses were too fancy for anything involving newsies, she decided on a dark green wool skirt and a white blouse and tied a dark green ribbon in her hair. She'd put her hair up tonight, something she didn't usually do. It was in a loose bun on top of her head and there were a few curls hanging down. Satisfied, she walked into the main room to wait for the guys. Kloppman had loaned her his bathroom for the night so that she wouldn't have to compete with forty boys for a mirror.
Before long the guys came storming down the stairs, all in their best shirts and jackets with their hair combed and their faces washed. Annalesa couldn't help but smile...they looked really nice. They set out for Medda's laughing and joking and Annalesa was humming Christmas carols. Whenever she was truly happy she sang, and tonight she was incredibly content. David was walking beside her and must have heard her humming because he started singing the song she had been humming. She joined him and when they finished with that one she started "O Holy Night", her favorite song. Not many of the newsies knew all the words but they listened as David and Annalesa and a few others completed the song. By the time they finished they had reached Medda's and there were already good smells and music coming from Irving Hall.
Jack had heard singing from the front of the group of newsies but wasn't really paying attention until he heard a girl singing by herself. When he listened more closely he realized it must be Annalesa, seeing as she was the only girl in the group. Before he could hear any more David and some of the other boys started singing with her and Jack cursed himself for not paying more attention earlier. From what he had heard Annalesa could really sing. Every minute there was something new about her that enthralled him and yet he couldn't tell her. He had never been this shy before...where was his usual confidence? Then he realized that he'd never met a girl like Annalesa before, either.
Annalesa stopped short when they walked into the lobby of Irving Hall. It was beautiful! Medda had decorated for Christmas and there were candles and wreathes all over the place. The newsies headed upstairs to the reception room, which was where the party was. There were tables of food and drinks and so many people Annalesa couldn't believe it. She recognized most of the Brooklyn newsies but nobody else. Apparently there were girl newsies too because no guy was without a girl. The Manhattan newsies started pairing up with the girls for dances and soon Annalesa found herself standing alone.
"Would you like to dance?" Annalesa turned to see David standing behind her.
"I'd love to." She smiled and soon they were spinning around the room laughing and talking. When the song was over, David left Annalesa to go get some drinks. Jack came up to her and said
"Hey. Think ya might be able ta save me a dance?"
"Well, Mr. Kelly, I think I might just be able to manage." Annalesa laughed. It had been a long time since she'd been able to have fun and she was enjoying herself immensely.
Just then Annalesa heard someone begin to play a fiddle and looked up to see a red headed newsie she didn't recognize playing an Irish reel and another newsie dancing in front of him. All of the other people in the room stopped to watch the dancing boy's flying feet. Annalesa found herself tapping her foot...this was the kind of dancing she'd been doing since she was able to walk. A few Irish families had originally settled her hometown and the town had remained predominantly Irish. They had overcome the typical stereotype of poor families and become a successful town. Jack interrupted her thoughts.
"MacGaren...that's Irish isn't it?" Annalesa nodded.
"Kelly...that Irish too?"
"Kelly's not my real name."
"Oh. Well...if you'll excuse me I'm going to see if I can't keep up with this fellow."
Annalesa walked over to the boy playing the fiddle and whispered something in his ear. He nodded and ended the current song, which drew thunderous applause from the spectators. During the noise Annalesa turned to the newsie who had been dancing and spoke to him as well. He nodded and then they looked at the boy playing the fiddle. He started a new song, a fast jig, and both Annalesa and the other boy started dancing. They took turns, each imitating the other's steps and adding new ones to make it harder. Annalesa picked up her skirt to give herself more room and her feet were flying. Finally the boy couldn't keep up with her anymore and he gave up, smiling his defeat. All of the newsies were clapping in time to the music and cheering Annalesa on. Jack stood off to the side, smiling. He looked at Annalesa...her hair was coming undone and her face was red but her feet kept going. He began to make his way through the crowd. Taking off his hat and handing it to David he walked to the middle of the circle in which Annalesa was dancing. He said
"Excuse me miss, may I join you?" in such a comical way that those who heard him went into peals of laughter. Annalesa nodded her consent and kept dancing. Soon Jack's feet were going as fast as Annalesa's and her eyes opened wider in amazement. So he could dance! The fiddler broke into a traditional Irish reel and Jack took Annalesa's hands and they spun around in circles, their feet seemingly never touching the floor. The newsies clapped and stomped and when the song ended Jack and Annalesa fell to the floor, laughing and out of breath. When Annalesa got her breath back a bit she looked at Jack and said
"So what is your real name?"
He grinned widely and replied with a laugh
"Sullivan."
The party went on and everyone was having a wonderful time. Race came up to where Annalesa was standing with Jack, David, and two other girls and tapped Annalesa on the back.
"Hey, 'Lesa?" He shortened her name for convenience, not realizing what he'd said. Annalesa froze and turned around.
"Please don't call me that Race..."
"Why not?"
"My father...and my brother used to call me that." Annalesa's eyes clouded over and Race said
"Oh sorry...anyways do ya want ta dance?" Annalesa shook her head slowly.
"No...thanks Race. I'm really tired." She tried to smile but only succeeded in looking sad.
"Oh...uh...ok. See ya later." Race left and Annalesa tried to get back into the conversation but her mind was elsewhere. My father...and my brother...they called me 'Lesa. It's Christmas but there's no tree, no presents, no family. No family... How could I have forgotten? Oh Papa...Michael...l Annalesa's thoughts were interrupted when David said
"Hey Annalesa...are you ok?" She looked and saw the group she was standing with all staring at her.
"Oh...yeah...fine thanks. I'm just going to...go outside for a minute. Excuse me."
Annalesa turned and hurried outside. She leaned against the cool brick and sucked in the cold December air. She hugged her arms around herself and felt the tears beginning to fall. How could she have forgotten? She felt so guilty for having a wonderful time when she had no family. Had no family...none. The thought struck her for the first time. She had nobody...nobody to comfort her in the middle of the night, nobody to yell at her when she did something wrong. Oh how she would give anything to hear her father reprimand her if only it meant she could have him back! The silent tears turned into sobs that begged to be let loose. She held them inside and shivered in the cold night air.
Jack watched Annalesa go and for a moment wanted to go after her. Let 'er go Kelley...she's probably just hot or somethin. But the harder he tried not to think about her, the more he did. Finally, without a word of explanation to his friends, he turned and ran down the stairs and outside. He looked around but didn't see anyone and was about to go inside when he saw a dim shape leaning against the wall. He walked over and said
"Annalesa?" She didn't look at him or acknowledge his presence so he came closer.
"Hey...what's wrong?" He noticed she was crying and put his hands on her shoulders. Without really meaning to he pulled her towards him a little and then she was in his arms. He held her lightly for a moment and then when he heard her crying and felt her shaking he tightened his grip. She started saying
"Jack...I..." but he stopped her and said
"It's ok. Just go ahead...I ain't got nothin else ta be doin' right now 'cept bein' right here." And with a start he realized that that was true. He couldn't imagine being anywhere else at all except out on the street near midnight on Christmas holding a girl named Annalesa MacGaren in his arms while she cried about something he knew nothing about.
When Annalesa's tears subsided, Jack led her to the steps and they sat down. He took off his coat and draped it over her shoulders and she gave him a grateful look. She was the first to speak.
"Imagine that...twice in one day I'm crying and you come and find me. Jack I'm sorry...I really don't usually cry like this it's just that it's today and...I'm not...well they're not...and..." she floundered for what to say and Jack said
"Shh...it don't matta why you was cryin, it don't matta how many times ya did. What I wanna know is are you ok now?"
"Yeah...I think I am. But I think I'm just going to go back to the Lodging house now. I'm tired and I really don't think I want to go back to the party..."
"I'll walk ya."
"Thanks." She smiled a small smile and they started walking back. She was silent, trying very hard not to think of her family and he was silent, thinking very hard about her. When they were about halfway there he stopped and said
"Anna...can I call you Anna?"
"Yes..."
"Anna I don't know what you think a me or nothin...I just know I think that I like yas a lot and dat youse different den de other goils around hea and what I'm tryin ta say is dat...well would you consida bein' my goil?" Jack rushed nervously through what he had to say and then turned to look at Annalesa, her face turned up to his in the moonlight.
"Jack...yes." She smiled up at him then and he pulled her into his arms again. This time she wasn't crying but smiling, and he was too. For the first time in months Jack felt truly happy and for once in his life he felt like there was something that really mattered. And Annalesa realized that she wasn't alone at all.