Whose cruel idea was it for the word lisp to have an “s” in it?
What do little birdies see what they are knocked unconscious
If quitters never win and winners never quit, then who is the fool who said, “Quit while you’re ahead”?
If you had chicken for lunch and chicken for dinner, ever wonder if they knew each other
Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do a “practice”?
When sign makers go on strike is they’re anything written on their signs?
Why is it when you are driving and looking for an address you turn down the volume on the radio?
Why is “abbreviation” such a long word?
Why use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice?
Instead of talking to your plants, if you yelled at them would they still grow only to be troubled and insecure?
When you open a bag of cotton balls, do you throw the first one away?
Where do forest rangers go to “get away from it all”?
Why isn’t there a mouse-flavored cat food?
What do you do if you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
If a funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their headlights off?
If a turtle loses its shell is it naked or homeless?
Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?
If cops arrest a mime do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
If vegetarians eat vegetables what do humanitarians eat?
If a mute swears does his mother was his hands with soap?
If a man speaks in the forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?
Would a fly that loses his wings be called a walk?
Ever stop thinking and forget to start again?
If one synchronized swimmer drowns do the rest have to drown too?
Don’t look back, they may be gaining on you
If a cow laughed would milk come out her nose
Tourists are terrorists with cameras, terrorists are tourists with guns
If a 7-11 is open 24 hours a day 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
If a person tells you that they always lie, are they telling the truth?
Why is the word “small” two letters bigger then the word “big”?
How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges did not live there
Is there another word for synonym?
Why do they put Braille on the drive though bank machine?
Why do they sterilize the needles for the lethal injections?
Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
When it comes to butter vs. margarine I trust cows over chemists
You know it’s a bad day when you jump out of bed and miss the floor
You know it’s a bad day when you put both contact lenses in the same eye
You know it’s a bad day when your income tax check bounces
You know it’s a bad day when you put your bra on backwards and it fits better
You know it’s a bad day when suicide prevention puts you on hold