THE ART OF ROMANCE

A woman will give a man all the sex he wants, if he will just learn how to give her all the romance and affection she wants and needs.

In order for any person to be completely happy in a relationship, they must have their needs met on all levels, emotional, mental, spiritual, and physical. Many can reach their mates on the mental and physical levels but the emotional and spiritual levels take a deeper understanding to reach. These two levels sometimes scare people, but it is necessary to understand them in order to reach these levels with a mate. When two mates can reach each other on all four levels, they are on the same wavelength. A union can only grow closer with each passing year they are together. Nothing need ever stagnate within the relationship, so long as all four levels are being reached for both people. Remember, a good relationship is a mixture of both giving and taking, not just one of the partners taking all the time while the other one constantly gives. Such a relationship will only create resentments on the part of the one doing all the giving and not receiving their share equally, and ending the relationship.

It's so easy to reach into the essence of a female if a male will only concentrate on her emotions and her spirit instead of just her physical body. I have noticed that when women start to gain weight, it is a sign that something is wrong in the boudoir department. Most likely, they are not getting the attention they desire from their mate, probably needing much more romance and affection than is being given. Women need romance and affection in order to respond sexually to a man. They need to bond emotionally and spiritually with you. Listen to what she says to you, giving her your undivided attention. Make her feel desireable. Tell her how beautiful she is to you. If she feels beautiful and desireable, then she will keep her body in shape to please you. Make her secure in knowing you will be there for her to help make the relationship work and that you will not abandon her. Reassure her daily of your love for her. Never just assume she knows that you love her without telling her this because men tend to think if they bring home the bacon, a woman should automatically know she is loved. It does not work this way. Women need to hear the words, "I love you," several times every day. They never get tired of hearing those three words. They also need to be hugged several times a day. Anyone needs at least twenty hugs per day to feel loved according to statistics. Take her out dining and dancing occasionally, like you are on a real date with her. Bring her flowers. Do little chores around the house to help her so she can sit down with you and relax more. A relaxed frame of mind is more likely to want to be sexual. Women give you points for doing little things, so never think you have to always do something extraordinary to get noticed. One of the nicest things a man can do for his mate is just hold her in his arms, without expecting sex in return. This makes a woman feel so secure with his strong arms around her, especially when she is having problems. By doing this occasionally, it will cause her to want to have more sex with you at other times.
Over a period of time a female's spirit can become closed to her mate if her needs are not taken seriously in the relationship. If you repeatedly tell her not to feel certain ways or invalidate her feelings, that will turn her off to you sexually over a period of time. To reopen your woman's spirit to your lovemaking, tell her you are sorry for the way you have treated her and ask her to forgive you for neglecting her needs or invalidating her feelings, and sincerely try to meet them from now on. You will see a renewed interest in you just by doing this. Just remember, most women operate from their emotions and feelings, so they will be able to tell if you are sincere or not.
  Regardless if you are in a new relationship, or one that you have been together for many years already, all any man has to do is look deeply into her eyes, capturing her spirit, and gently approach her almost nose-to-nose without actually touching her.  Inhale her breath into your own nostrils, and feel her emotions and spirit all around you.  She will melt like butter within minutes, if you will try this.  This is why women enjoy dancing so much.  It's the one moment in life they can be touched, caressed, nuzzled, and completely enveloped within a man's strong arms without him thinking about anything else. At some point when he feels her submission and weakness to him, he could ever so gently brush his lips tenderly over hers, remaining there as he breathes in her essence again. There is no way she will turn from him at this point. Do not just press your lips hard into hers. Make it a gentle, tender kiss at first.  The next level of kisses are done in stages and are up to both of you as to how passionate they will be. Just remember to build each level a little higher than the other.  Take your time as if each kiss is a seduction in itself. This can be the time that will make or break the moment of passion.   There are the gentle and soft pecks, as each nuzzles their faces gently together.  There are the lip explorers, that will take women to new heights of eroticism, wrapping your lips gently around each others to feel the various sizes, and thicknesses, with gentle licking and sucking.
  Women are very passionate.  Women must feel their passions rise to different levels during lovemaking. Women need at least 22 minutes of foreplay before they can even begin to get aroused for passionate sex.  If men aren't equipped to take you to these levels, then it's your responsibility to teach them what you want.  Take them through the steps outlined above.  If you are rusty at it, or embarrassed because you had pretty much given up from all the years of a lack of sensuality, remember it's never too late to start again.  You might even give your mate a kick start.  Catch him when he is least expecting a kiss.  Let him know that a sensual kiss can be a reward for all of his kindness and little things he does for you.  It can become as important as anything else he wants from you once or twice a week.  These kisses should be freely and spontaneously given.  You may even spark a new sense of creativity in him like it was when you first met.  Always let there be plenty of touching and caressing each other's bodies. Massage is a good form of touch to relax each other. Play soft, sensual music in the background. Light scented candles or burn incense to create ambience. Always think romance. Kiss, touch, and caress each other until you both have risen to a level of pure lust. All women crave to be seduced by their mates. She will let you know when she is ready. Her body will be arching into yours begging you for more. Do not rush this seduction process, as it will bring tremendous results when done right. There will be so much hot and heavy breathing that you will lose yourself totally in each other, and truly become one flesh as the Bible says a man and wife are when joined together.

There are many ways to give each other sexual pleasure which should be openly and candidly discussed before any type of sex is begun. What might be a turn-on for one, might be offensive for another. If you cannot discuss your sexual preferences, then something is wrong inside yourselves. I suggest professional counseling before any further proceedings in the art of romance.
Sex does not make up the whole relationship. It is the icing on the cake, not the actual cake. Two people should have similar interests and be available to each other on emotional and spiritual wavelengths, not just physical and mental ones. It takes all four levels to make a complete and happy relationship. And it takes daily sharing of those feelings, so nothing will get bottled up inside to fester. Daily sharing and open communication keeps a couple bonding closer to each other. Men, never be afraid to share your emotional side with your mate. It will only make your bond stronger.

You might be wondering what is normal as far as sex?

Statistics show that married couples have sex at least a couple times each week. What is normal for you is what feels right for you and your partner. If you both want sex every day, then that is fine. Or if you both only want sex once a month, that is fine too, provided you are both satisfied with that. It is all about what makes both of you happy, not just one of you. If one of you is not happy, then you need to sit down and discuss your relationship with a pen and paper in hand to make notes. People who are genuinely in love care about the other person's needs and want to meet them, if at all possible.

When you first wake up each morning, let your thoughts be, how can I make my mate's life a little easier today or a little happier?

We all deserve to be treated with love, admiration, and respect. Look for your mate's best and positive qualities and admire them for those qualities. Once a person starts looking for the negative traits in a mate, problems only intensify.

You can have the relationship you have always dreamed of having, but it takes a lot of daily work from both people to make it happen. One person cannot do it all. Plus, God needs to be at the center of each of your lives as well as at the heart of the relationship. Never forget to pray and thank God for each other, and the love you share. Pray after sex and thank Him for what He has just let you and your partner experience. A three corded knot cannot be broken, and with God, you, and your partner, no one else will be able to ever come between you.