Disclaimer: I do not own nor do I even lightly pretend to own the X-Men. They are the property of Marvel comics. I am, however, the original creator of Jaguar. Please do not make use of her without first talking to me. I am making no money or receiving any compensation, other than thanks from friends, for the writing of this original fanfiction. Wouldn’t do ya no good to sue me anyway, I ain’t got nothing for you to get.

Warning: This work contains material concerning homosexual relationships, violence, and gruesomely detailed descriptions. Please turn away if you have a weak stomach or are easily offended. (Actually, the gruesome details will appear in a later section, but I thought I’d add the warning here for the benefit of all concerned)

I’ve Had Better Days

Chapter 1

I’ve never been so exhausted.

This was the last thought that passed through the young mutant’s mind before she fell face-first onto the ground. She had taken the first opening in days to escape the mansion. Not that she was not happy here, in fact, she’d never been happier. It was just becoming increasingly difficult to ignore the sounds from across the hall, and the snores, some gentle, some not so gentle, from all around. Never in her life had she been near a place with so many snorers. Even without living in the mansion any longer, it was as though her ears reached out for those sounds. Many nights she had lain awake her mind filled with memories of those sounds.

As a child, she had waited until her mother left the room, then climbed out onto the roof to sleep in the fresh air. As she grew older, she had moved further and further from the house. Eventually, she ended up spending her sleeping hours in a forest just over two miles from her home. By this time though, her mother was well aware of her sleeping habits, and only asked her to come home every morning. It was not too much to ask, any child would gladly have come back to a mother so dearly loved, and the only safe place she knew. In fact, the only time she had not been allowed to sleep outside was when her grandfather took her to his laboratories. However, those were times when nothing went well; times that were thankfully trapped behind a large mental door, with a most convincing ‘No Trespassing’ sign.

As it happened, these nightly jaunts turned out to be her salvation. When her grandfather became infuriated with her mother and herself, and decided to mete out punishment, only her mother was trapped in the burning building. ‘Thanks’ to her telepathic abilities, which was little more than heightened awareness of the psychic plane, the easily forgotten child knew that it was the smothering effects of smoke that killed the mother, and not the torment of the flames. Unfortunately, this meant she also carried with her the moments of terror her mother had experienced before succumbing to the smoke.

After vicariously experiencing such a horrible incident, anyone else with feral instincts as strong as hers would have become a raving mad animal seeking revenge. But, the girl had been trained to suppress her more animalistic urges, and think before acting in every situation. Her grandfather himself had seen to that, and he had taught his lessons well. Her mother had made sure she knew who her father was despite circumstances, and she knew how to reach him. For this, and countless other things, she would be eternally grateful.

As the woman lay in the tree line surrounding Professor Charles Xavier’s mansion, deeply inhaling the smell of pine needles and dirt, all these things, and many more coursed through her mind. She was beginning to worry about her inability to cope with training alongside the X-Men. Never before had any amount of physical exertion even winded her. Being limited by stamina had never been a worry of hers after spending most of her life alone, and fending for herself in the wild. Not to mention the time spent doing ‘mercenary’ work. But now, anything more than everyday activity exhausted her nearly to the point of collapse.

So far, she had been able to hide the strain from her cohorts, even Sabretooth. Most of that, she knew, was accountable to the fact that they expected her to be worn out trying to keep up with them her first few months as a member of the team. If she was a little winded at the end of a Danger Room session, they were less than concerned. But, she was also a master at hiding what she did not want others to see. ‘Hide your weakness, and your opponent will never be able to use it against you.’ That was her motto, and the adage had served her well in countless situations. As far as Sabretooth was concerned, he never wanted to think she might have a weakness, so it was easy to keep it from him.

Finally, the turmoil of her thoughts ceased, and she was left with a clear head. She could thoroughly immerse her enhanced senses in the smells, sounds, sights, and textures of the surrounding forest. This too was something she had been missing; the chance to just let herself go free and be one with nature. After spending as many years as she had allowing her feral side nearly free reign, it was unnerving to have to remain civil all the time. The battle to keep back her feral nature was becoming harder and harder each day and she knew she needed time to be herself if she was ever to maintain that hold. She was just about to bound off when she heard footsteps and voices calling for her.

"Jaguar! Come out, come out, wherever you be! C’mon chere! Gambit see you come in ‘ere! Come on out an’ play!"

Gambit! Jaguar growled to herself. There were two X-Men from whom she had not yet been able to hide successfully, and the devil-eyed mutant was one of them. It was not that she did not like him, quite the contrary as she had opted to take up residence with him and Iceman in the boathouse when Scott and Jean offered the new lovers the opportunity. Nor was it that she usually minded spending time with him. It was just that today she wanted some time to herself. Ever since he had dragged her lifeless body into the X-Men’s medlab, she had not had a moment’s reprieve from the watchful eyes of the X-Men. It was as though they expected her to fall over dead any minute. Granted, once they had all learned that she was Wolverine’s daughter, they had become much less insistent about keeping tabs on her. Nonetheless, she was very aware of the fact that she had never been truly alone. Solitude was very important to her, almost as important as her image in other’s eyes, and this constant supervision was doing nothing for her nerves. What bothered her even more though, was the fact that Gambit was so very close, and she hadn’t realized he was coming until he’d called out to her. She sniffed the air, hoping, but seriously doubting that he was alone. She growled a second time when she caught wind of his companion. ~And, Bobby. Doesn’t that boy ever let Gambit outta his sight? ~ She was not surprised. The Iceman and the Cajun were always tagging along after one another. She had been the first to admit that they were perfect for one another – fire and ice. If Gambit had been alone, she could have gotten over not noticing him because he was a master thief, highly skilled at sneaking up on people, but Bobby made enough noise to alert a deaf man to his presence a mile away.

"Hey, Cat! You in there?"

Jaguar sighed audibly this time, than answered, lifting her face just enough to be audible. "Must you use that despicable nickname, Bobby?"

As the two men walked up to her, Jaguar pushed her lithe frame up to a crouch. She shook her head quickly, then stood straight. Immediately, she fell back against a tree, losing her balance with the sudden motion. Blackness clouded in in a halo surrounding her vision, and she lost all senses for a few brief, terrifying moments. When her head cleared, she found Gambit supporting her on the right, and Bobby supporting her on the left.

"Y’alright, chere?"

Jaguar shrugged the two men off, striding across the small clearing to get away from their suddenly oppressive presence. Her arms tingled with their residual touch, and she rubbed at the places vigorously trying to erase the sensation. "Yeah, yeah! I’m fine. Just lost my balance for a sec."

Bobby snorted, "Yeah, right! I’m willing to bet you haven’t lost your balance a single day in your life. Why don’t you tell us another…"

Gambit wisely cut Bobby off short with his own protests, as Jaguar whirled, her eyes blazing fire. "We seen de way ya run outta de mansion soon as ya could, chere. Gambit ain’ never seen nobody look so wornou’. We be worried, dat’s all."

Chapter 2

Of course, he had been worried about her ever since finding her out on the streets that first night. Gambit had been walking past an alleyway to retrieve his Harley after one of his more active bar nights, when some locals had nearly run over him in their haste. Staring after them, Gambit had heard a soft, pained mewing from the dark recesses of the alley from which they had emerged. Thinking the boys had been beating some defenseless cat, he had cursed violently about the insensitivity of common street thugs these days, and went to find their forgotten victim, thinking maybe the X-Men might appreciate a new pet.

What he had found nearly caused him to lose his bourbon. Jaguar lay prone in a pool of blood behind a dumpster. From what Gambit had been able to surmise at the time, the thugs had slapped a Genoshian collar on the girl before she could fight them off. They had beaten her to a bloody pulp, slashing her body and face so there were no recognizable features, other than the oddly mottled skin, and even that was barely recognizable under all the blood. In fact, there were numerous places where the blood was flowing so thickly that he was certain all the skin, as well as chunks of muscle had been removed. What little clothing they had left did nothing to hide or protect her exposed flesh from the bitter cold winds, and the rain that was beginning to fall.

The Cajun doubted the unfortunate woman could possibly be saved, but wrapped his duster around her, and sped off to enlist Hank McCoy’s help, anyway. It had later been discovered that the beating was the least of the indignities inflicted upon the girl Bobby had dubbed ‘The Cat’. The first thing Hank noticed was that the abuse had been spread out over the course of several days, as indicated by the various levels of healing in the bruises over her body. His disgust with the human race was furthered when he discovered that she had been gang raped during the course of her entrapment.

Once the furry doctor and Gambit had removed the collar, and Jaguar’s healing factor had begun to do its work, her new nickname seemed much more appropriate. Bobby was the first to notice the tail, which had been cut off during her imprisonment, and the pointed ears showing easily now that her hair had nearly been completely shaved off. He nearly coughed up a lung trying to control his surprise when she opened her eyes to reveal slit pupils, and irises the color of a jungle-cat’s. He had chosen the name based on Gambit’s description of the mewing that alerted him to her presence in the alleyway, but it stuck once she showed them just how cat-like she could move.

Hank had tried to hold her in his lab a few days to ‘perform some preliminary exams to ensure that your health has indeed been restored, my dear’, as he so eloquently put it. Scott, Logan, and Gambit had seen ‘the fear’ cross her features the moment staying in the lab for tests was mentioned, and Gambit had managed to convince the good doctor to let her rest before doing any of his tests. Jaguar had immediately offered her thanks, her aid (should it ever be needed), and her friendship (should it be welcome). Thus, had her friendship with Gambit and the resulting friendship between her and Bobby begun. Despite their good intentions, the others had strained her patience nearly to the breaking point over and over again, causing her to keep them always at a distance.

Despite all that Gambit had seen happen to the woman standing before him, he had never seen her cool and collected exterior falter for a second. The fall he’d just witnessed had him worried. He glanced over Jaguar’s body as he calculated just how far he could push his concern for her well being and still keep his head. The mutant he saw before him bore little resemblance to the creature he had drug in that night a little more than a month ago. She was definitely much more attractive now, to say the least. Her thick, raven hair had grown back out quickly, nearly reaching her lower back now, and easily covering the cat-like ears with its volume. Looking at her, one would have thought a jaguar had somehow managed to flatten its face, and grow long hair. Her skin was a brilliant golden tan, blotted only by the black spots covering her body, tipping off the last two inches of her tail. She had the grace and beauty associated with felines, and enough natural and trained agility that even Gambit found it hard to match her from time to time. Currently, she was decked out in a black spandex body suit, which she had ripped the sleeves out of, amply accentuating her muscular frame. Gambit smiled remembering the fuss she made when Cyclops ‘suggested’ she put on some shoes, at least for workouts and battles. She had won the argument by cutting the boots their illustrious leader had thrown at her into ribbons with her claws before they hit the ground. Cyclops had given in then, not willing to waste another perfectly good pair of boots to her temper. Finally, Gambit met Jaguar’s eyes, red on black staring into golden slits, and realized it was best he let the matter drop.

"I’m tellin’ ya, I’m fine. Just leave off, a’ight?" Jaguar finally cut off. She had been talking to Bobby during Gambit’s gentle reflection, and was quickly becoming irritated.

"D’accord. But, ya wan’ talk bout anyt’ing, we here. Ya know dat, right chere?"

Had it not been for Gambit’s calming words, and easy change of subject, Jaguar would have bitten Bobby’s head off. However, she trusted the Cajun to keep the Iceman in line, and knew that was what he had been trying to do. So, she let the matter drop. She sounded just as calm as always, with the exhaustion so well hidden that only someone with hearing as good as her own or Wolverine’s could have heard it. "Like I said, I’ll be fine. Just had a coupla real bad nights, lately."

Bobby didn’t looked convinced, but Gambit put a reassuring arm around his shoulder, and Jaguar shot a glance that dared him to speak up again at the risk of tasting her claws, both sets. The younger man really didn’t have a chance of fighting both of them on this, so he gave in, knowing that he would find the time to talk to Hank about it later, maybe even get Gambit to tell him what he thought was happening. "Well, Gambit and I are going to get out of here for a while. Enjoy a night on the town. We thought you might like to come along, Cat."

Jaguar visibly winced, but kept her temper. "Thanks, Ice, but no. I was gonna do a little huntin’. Been a while, what with the team so very worried about me, and Nate on my case all the time. Thought I might even invite the old man."

"You don’ wan’ be spendin’ all your time ‘round here. Dere’s much more ‘citing t’ings in town, neh? We enjoy your compn’y. De ol’ man be spendin' de day wit’ Jubilee. She come in jest ta see ‘im. Gambit surprised he not tell you, chere."

" ‘S alright Gambit. What with you guys and Sabretooth keeping me up nights, and Scott getting us up early, I haven’t exactly been sleeping much lately." What she would not admit, was that it was not just the environment that was keeping her up, but the nightmares. She suspected Gambit caught the lie, but hoped he would leave well enough alone. ~ After all, she reasoned, the nightmares are only bothering me again because I’m cooped up in that house. ~ The minute she could get out and sleep in the open, she would be fine again. "Xavier’s got some great land here, and I gotta get to know it better."

"We be seein’ ya den, chere. We do somet’in tomorrow, neh?"

"Yeah, I hear there’s a great new show out. You’d love it, Cat."

"Bobby, you’ve got about ten seconds to get outta my face, before I slit you open."

Chapter 3

Jaguar watched as the two men walked off arm in arm, laughing at the threat, knowing she would never carry through on it. Her mind lapsed into thoughts of the incident that had seen the two of them finally come together. It was her second night in the mansion, and Hank was trying to find a place other than the medlab where he was comfortable having his newest ‘patient’ sleep, as she adamantly refused to spend one moment more than necessary there. He did not want her too far from him, just in case something happened during the course of the night. Jaguar tried to convince him that she would be fine, and to explain that she preferred sleeping outdoors, but he simply would not listen to her. Finally, Bobby had suggested his room. "It’s right beside yours, Hank. There’s no way anything can go wrong and you not know about it immediately."

The Beast had considered the matter settled, and sent the two to finalize the arrangements for themselves. Jaguar had protested the minute the lab door closed behind her, "Where you gonna sleep? I’m not putting anybody out of a room, Bob. Certainly not a friend."

Just then Gambit had come around the corner, and wrapped a friendly arm around her shoulder. "Gambit hear somebody be needin’ a room? You welcome ta sleep wit’ me, chere. Gambit not mind." He had flashed one of his patented smiles at her, guaranteed to melt any other female in an instant, and winked at Bobby as he kissed her on the cheek, just a hair away from her fangs.

She had shrugged off his arm with a laugh. "Funny, Remy. Bobby’s the one without a bed, really. Not me. But, I’m sure neither one of you’d be upset with him taking my place in your bed."

Bobby had blushed a shade of royal red, and even Gambit was left a little tongue-tied. "Gambit not catch your meanin’ on dat one, chere."

She had stared at them in disbelief. "You’re tellin' me that you two…. I mean, it seemed so obvious. I just assumed y’all were…well…together. Sorry. No idea. I can’t believe…. I was wrong. Forgive…" But, then she had looked at Bobby, and realized that she had not really been wrong. What she saw in his eyes was a mixture of desire, and fear, and realization of oneself all at the same time. She had turned to look at Gambit then, and had been hit by his own wave of desire for Bobby. Then she had laughed lightly, "…maybe I wasn’t so wrong?"

Gambit, staring directly into Bobby’s eyes, had smiled and murmured. "Meebe not, chere."

Jaguar had not even waited around to find out what else would happen. She did not need to really; she already knew what it was. She had not slept that night, but had smiled to herself at every small noise of pleasure that drifted to her ears from down the hall in Gambit’s room. At least I did something right this time, she had thought.

The response of a couple of the X-Men to the boys’ relationship had been much less supportive, and in some cases, more violent than she had expected from people who claimed to be their friends. In fact, Hank, Jean, Wolverine, and Storm were the only members of the team that had stood beside them with no questions asked. Scott thought it too dangerous for either of them to be involved with a teammate. His own wife had gotten up in his face on that one, and he’d backed down, and decided to be supportive no matter how uncomfortable he was. Betsy did not really care one way or the other until Warren had nearly attacked Gambit for ‘corrupting an innocent.’ Nothing else had been heard from either of them on the matter since Betsy made him apologize. Joseph was passive, as was Xavier. Rogue was their only real problem.

The Southern Belle had been incensed, and started crying, and screaming hysterically at Bobby. "How can ya do this, sugah? Didn’t ya see what he done ta me? He’s just gonna hurt ya! Just like he did me. Please, sugah, don’t do this. Ah couldn’t bear seein’ ya get hurt like Ah was." Then she had started talking about him being in her way, and a lot of other stuff that nobody understood.

However, Jaguar understood something. She’d been bored the night before, and peeked through Xavier’s files. What she found sickened her. It appeared to her that Rogue had been consciously manipulating Gambit and the entire team since his return from the frozen wastelands of the Arctic. It had probably been going on long before that as well. Jaguar assumed that what Rogue was seeing was the loss of her leverage if the Cajun found happiness.

Bobby had tried to make Rogue stop her raving, telling her she didn’t know what she was talking about, that Remy wasn’t really like that, that she was mistaken. Gambit had just stood there, head lowered, accepting everything she had to say about him, no matter how vile it might be.

Finally, Rogue got tired of listening to Bobby, and had gotten in Gambit’s face and screamed, "You stay away from him swamp rat, or Ah’ll rip ya apart muhself! Ah’ll not let you hurt my friends, too!" Then she had slapped him, throwing him across the room with her strength. Wolverine managed to catch the Cajun before he went through a plate glass window, and handed him over to Bobby. This had only angered Rogue more, and she had flown straight for Gambit to hit him again.

Jaguar had not been able to stop herself after Rogue’s display of violence. She’d gotten directly in Rogue’s path, and managed to stop her, something nobody else had ever managed to accomplish, which was due more to her knowledge of anatomy than anything else. Then Jaguar had spoken very low, and very calmly, a slight growl in every word adding to the dangerous stance she had taken up. "You Bitch! What the HELL is wrong with you?! Do you get off by making people do what you want, making Gambit miserable? He loved you. Woulda done anything to make you happy, and you dumped him faster than a hot potato out in the middle of nowhere, literally. I got news for you, darlin. Y’ain’t hurtin' nobody around here again. So, I suggest you stay outta my way, and let a good thing alone while ya still got lungs in that pretty little chest o’ yours."

Jaguar did not exactly remember what happened next. All she knew was that one minute Rogue had opened her mouth to respond, and the next minute Jaguar had been struggling against the combined forces of Wolverine, and Cyclops, Rogue’s blood dripping from her arms and adamantium claws. Storm and Hank were trying to staunch the flow of blood from Rogue’s body. Bobby was sitting in the floor, an unconscious Gambit, bleeding nose and split lip from Rogue’s assault, cradled in his lap. Warren and Betsy had entered at that moment. Betsy had immediately assessed the situation and knocked Jaguar out with a psychic blast, solving that part of the problem neatly.

It had only been a couple of hours before Jaguar had regained consciousness and found herself restrained in the War Room. Gambit and Bobby were standing beside her, waiting to advise her of the situation, and to thank her for stopping Rogue. Betsy, who had been standing by the door waiting for the same moment, left to collect Scott, Ororo, and the professor. When they returned, Betsy had ushered Bobby and Gambit out, leaving Jaguar to the mercy of the X-Men’s leaders. Scott stood stoically by the door, making sure no one interrupted the proceedings. It had been Storm’s duty to relate Rogue’s condition. The younger mutant woman would be scarred for life from the physical attack, if she managed to survive the lasting psychic damage Jaguar’s previously unused power had wreaked. Xavier took it upon himself to inform Jaguar what they expected her to do in order to rectify the damage she had wrought.

"You must understand that it is not acceptable to attack without first considering the ramifications of your actions, my dear. Such behavior will simply not be tolerated. We have discussed the matter extensively with the other X-Men, and have come to an agreement.

"There is nothing to be done for the physical scarring, yet there is much we can do in order to ensure that Rogue will survive without lasting mental damage. While I am certainly capable of resolving these issues in time, I am certain that you are capable of repairing the damage with much less time and effort. We have decided that you will go into Rogue’s mind and repair the damage yourself. Of course, you will not be allowed to do this alone, I will monitor your activity. But, you will fix what you have done."

Jaguar had stared at Xavier for some time, almost as though she were trying to comprehend what had been said, when in truth she had been wondering how the man had developed the courage to order her to do anything. When she finally did speak, it was very matter-of-fact, and she maintained her composure throughout despite her rising anger. "I think not, X. It ain’t like I got much in the way of psychic abilities, just enough to know who’s around, what they’re feeling, catch a few stray thoughts here and there. All real simple stuff. Momma always said it was just another heightened sense. I wouldn’t even know what the hell I’ve done, much less how to fix it.

"As to how I know what’s up in her head. Well, I read the chick’s files. Pretty damn obvious to anybody with half a brain what’s been going on. That whore’s wreaked havoc from one end of her life to the other. All she wants to do is manipulate those who care about her. She’d probably do anything, and I do mean anything, to see that nothing’s beyond her control. I’m not about to put her back ‘on the streets,’ as it were, to let her cause more damage.

"How can you miss what she’s done to Gambit, anyway? My God, Xavier, she tore him apart, left him to die, and you’ve all been sitting around, watching it happen. He believes he’s the cause of all her problems, and that he’s evil. Not that those are his only reasons for believing that, but it just reinforces it all. From what I saw, your X-Men were willing to let her rip him to pieces back there because they’ve been convinced of the very same thing. Bobby and I were the only ones in that room that were concerned about his well being when she attacked him. The rest of them were only concerned with the ‘emotional trauma’ that the Swamp Rat had caused their beloved Southern Belle. And, that’s exactly the way that girl wants it. I may be the new kid ‘round here, but I ain’t missed the way y’all treat Remy. He’s the black-sheep of the X-Men. And, it’s a rep he ain’t done nothing to deserve. He ain’t done nothing more than some of the rest of ya. And, he’s been tryin’ his damnedest to make up for it since he showed up. Y’all are willin’ ta give anybody but him another chance, and it ain’t right.

"If you want to bring Rogue back, that’s your business. But, I will not help you. Hell, I wouldn’t know where the fuck to start even if I wanted to. Like I said, I ain’t never done much more than pick up a few random thoughts here and there. If I try real hard I can insert myself in somebody’s mind for a coupla seconds. That’s it. Never done nothing else. I don’t know what the hell I did to her, much less how to undo it." She paused, looking into Xavier’s eyes to emphasize her statement.

"Now, I’ll thank you to release me. And, if you want, I’ll get the fuck outta Dodge, and go about my own. You got my word I’ll leave the premises without layin’ a hand on anything. I am sorry that I spilled blood in your house Prof, I ain’t sorry for what I did to her, though. I would have finished the job if your X-Men hadn’t stopped me, and I’d do the same thing again in the same situation."

The Professor stared at her in utter disbelief. None of them had been prepared for Jaguar’s flat refusal, or her assertion that she was unaware of the damage she had wrought. Storm collapsed into a nearby chair, sobbing silently. She too had known that Rogue was a troubled young woman, and had spoken with the Professor about Rogue’s problems. It grieved her that she had been unable to stop this before it came to violence. Cyclops was ready to escort Jaguar off the premises immediately, and said as much. Finally, the Professor had released her from the restraints, and asked her to talk with him for a few moments alone. Storm and Scott had taken the hint, and left quickly and quietly.

Xavier and Jaguar sat in silence, looking, contemplating one another for several tense moments. Xavier suddenly began extolling the virtues of patience, and how much he hoped to help Jaguar master her powers, perhaps bring her obviously latent psychic abilities to fruition, and eventually make her a full member of his team. Jaguar listened in disbelief as he continued to explain the psychological scarring Rogue’s powers had caused the young mutant, and how far she had come with accepting them since he had first encountered her. Jaguar had then pointed out that all he thought he’d done was bullshit, that he’d accomplished nothing, that Rogue was a master of deception, and had fooled one of the most powerful telepaths on the planet. She was just about to invite him into her mind to see the truth, when Hank interrupted them, to report that Rogue was slipping from their grasp.

All the X-Men were gathered in the medlab, many in varied states of shock over losing a teammate in such a manner. Jean and Betsy were both thoroughly exhausted from their efforts to repair the damage to Rogue’s psyche. They had made no advancement, and Betsy feared their final effort had actually done more harm than good. Rogue had slipped from their grasp, and appeared to be giving up on life. Joseph sat by her bed, the last victim of her manipulations crying his heart out for the woman he believed he loved. Warren and Scott supported their ladyloves, wishing there were something more they could do to help. Bishop and Wolverine stood detached, but still clearly worried for a teammate’s well-fare, as well as that of the rest of the team. Hank hovered over Rogue, his last efforts proving useless. Storm stood by the window unable to watch her friend die, yet not willing to leave. Even Bobby and Remy were in attendance, though noticeably standing detached from the others, as though they were being blamed for the incident.

The minute Jaguar and Xavier entered the room, Wolverine moved towards her. "Take a good look, kid! You’re gonna fix this, or I’m gonna rip you open from stem to stern."

Jaguar only eyed him, totally unfazed by a threat she knew he would never carry out. Threats that even should he carry out, would not be enough to kill her. She fully doubted the X-Men would allow two mutants to die on the grounds in one day. It might be a little painful, but nothing she had not dealt with before.

It was, in fact, Xavier that responded to Wolverine. "Have we not had enough bloodshed today, Logan?" And, just as quickly as he had jumped to the offensive, Wolverine had backed down.

Slowly, Jaguar had moved closer to Rogue’s bed. Gently, she forced Joseph and Hank to move aside, and told them all to stand back. She did not know what was driving her to act, but she never denied her instincts, so she was just going with the flow. She laid a hand on either side of Rogue’s face, and closed her eyes. As the gathered X-Men watched, unable to bring themselves to warn the convicted mutant, a light began steadily to grow between their fallen comrade’s face, and Jaguar’s hands. Oddly enough, the contact did not seem to be draining Jaguar of power at all. The light grew to a blinding white brilliance, which surrounded the women, and continued to grow. Before too long, the room was flooded, and all present were forced to close either their eyes or risk going blind. They heard two hushed voices - women’s voices. So hushed were the voices that not even Wolverine could make out the words. The voices suddenly went still, a hand passed across the faces of each X-Man, and a pair of lips brushed Joseph’s own. Finally, the light began to die down just as suddenly as it had grown until it only encircled the two women making it impossible to discern anything about either of them.

The light suddenly disappeared, and Jaguar was left standing beside Rogue’s still body. There was no life in Rogue’s body, and there appeared to be nearly as little left in Jaguar. She leaned heavily against the bed, but only remained that way a moment. When she turned to face the others, she had regained her composure, and looked as fresh as the newly risen sun. "Once she realized what she’d done, and that there wasn’t no way to undo it, or to stop doing it, Rogue gave up." Jaguar spoke with a voice that was not quite hers. It was as though something else was speaking through her. "The hand that brushed your faces, was her hand. That was her last wish, to touch the faces of her true friends. And somehow, she was waiting for me to help her do that."

The X-Men had crowded the weakened mutant then. Some asking forgiveness, some offering their thanks for what she’d done, others trying to get around her to be closer to Rogue. Everything around her began to swim. Jaguar tried to move away from the crowd of bodies, desperately seeking fresh air. She managed only two steps before running into someone. She tried again, but found her vision darkening. The world started spinning faster and faster. The voices around her phased in and out of her hearing. She shook her head in an effort to clear it. She blinked several times, trying to make the world collect itself. But, nothing helped. The more she tried to steady herself, the more unsteady she became. She was panicking, and her heart was racing. Her breathing became erratic, and her world started going dark. Her panic skyrocketed.

Chapter 4

Jaguar was suddenly pulled from her reverie by a hand on her shoulder. She immediately jumped up, and fell into a defensive stance. She found Wolverine standing a few feet in front of her. Jubilee stood just within the tree line, looking rather startled, and quite frightened.

"Wolvie…?" Jubilee started tentatively.

"Just stay there, don’t move." The gruff man shot in Jubilee’s direction, keeping himself between her and the still tense Jaguar. He turned his attentions to calming the other woman. "Whoa, darlin’. Ain’t nobody here gonna hurt ya. What’s got ya so jumpy?"

The sound of her father’s gruff voice slowly dragged Jaguar back to reality, and the panic dredged up by the unwanted visions slowly faded away. Of course, the adrenaline rush did not phase out so quickly, and left her a bit jumpier than usual. Slowly, she relaxed, and straightened up, apologizing. "Sorry. Don’t know what’s gotten inta me lately. Musta…" Still in a slight haze, she noticed that her claws were extended, and blood coated the tips of her fingers. She retracted the claws, silently pleased that she had managed not to use the more deadly adamantium ones, and dismissing the urge to clean the blood off with her tongue. ~What the hell’s gotten into me lately?~ "Damn, Pop! Didn’t get ya bad did I?" she asked out of true concern.

"Nah, just a flesh wound, darlin’. Not a problem. Already healed up. Jubes and I thought ya might like ta join us. We’re headed out to town."

Jubilee walked over towards them, having decided that everything was under control, and not wanting to be left out of the conversation any longer. "Why don’t you come with us, Cat?" She smiled inwardly at the nickname Iceman had taught her for the newest resident of the X-Mansion. He had told her never to call Jaguar that to her face, because she hated it, but Jubilee just could not resist. In fact, she had never called the woman anything but. There was something about Jaguar that Jubilee had not liked from the moment she heard about her. Anybody who randomly showed up, professing to be her Wolvie’s long-lost daughter… Well, it just did not add up to Jubilee, especially after the incident with Rogue, and then there was the whole Sabretooth thing. "It’ll be great. And, like, we could get to be great friends and all."

Wolverine bristled at the look Jaguar was giving Jubilee. It was almost like a predator inspecting its prey, and it unsettled him somewhat. He did not quite know what to make of it.

For her part, Jaguar was slowly slipping, finding the world around her going blurry, as Jubilee became the only focal point. She raised her chin slightly scenting the air, and nearly purred in appreciation of what she found there. And then, without warning, she slammed back into the moment, shaking her head slightly to clear the cobwebs.

Wolverine noticed the move, but did not know what to make of it. The predatory look had disappeared just as suddenly as it had appeared, and Jaguar was looking as normal as she ever did. He stood, staring into her face, wondering what he had just seen.

By this time, Jubilee had grown tired of being ignored by the two older mutants. She cleared her throat loudly, and tried to get things moving along a second time. "So, Cat, ya coming?"

As it happened, that was the worst possible moment for Jubilee to have been playing her games. Jaguar whipped her head around at the repeated use of the hated nickname. Her every sense focused directly on Jubilee, and she opened her mouth to warn her against using that name again. She never managed it. Instead, she caught wind of a scent, and her world snapped entirely out of focus. She found herself locked deep within her instinctual self, totally without rational control. She began blatantly scenting the air around Jubilee, purring in appreciation, totally ignoring Wolverine, and slowly moving closer to the girl.

Wolverine caught sight of the moment of change this time. Now the look was even deeper than it had been before. What he saw in Jaguar’s eyes, in her every movement, was the hunger of a starved beast – a beast that would not be denied its quarry. He heard Jubilee whimper, "Wolvie…. what’s she doin'?" He saw the gleam in his daughter’s eyes at the weak, frightened sound from his friend. He tried to get Jaguar’s attention by shouting at her to stop, telling her to snap out of it. However, Jaguar was only paying attention to Jubilee. He was loath to attack the woman; especially as Jubilee was too close should the fighting get ugly. Uncharacteristically, he decided to take the less direct approach before resorting to physical assault. "Jubes, stand your ground. Talk to her. Try to snap her out of it."

Jubilee was sweating bullets by this time. She had never seen anyone look at her like Jaguar was right then. The woman’s eyes were glossed over with something undefinable, almost like Wolverine’s battle rage, but deeper than that somehow, and her every movement radiated hostility. The frightened girl been taking a step back for every step forward of the woman, and that look just kept getting wilder and wilder. Jubilee’s every instinct was telling her to run, but Wolverine had told her to stand her ground. Of course, he’d told her to talk too, but she couldn’t think of anything right then, so she just said the first thing that popped into her head, "Are you alright, Cat?"

Jaguar’s neck cracked to the side just as the name was uttered, and her muscles tightened visibly, but she responded. "Yeah, just fine." In fact, she almost purred the words, her voice not meshing with her physical appearance at all. The words set her into motion towards Jubilee again, her tongue snaking out to lick her lips in anticipation of the prey waiting on her, her eyes blazing with blood lust, her breath coming out in controlled gasps of delight.

Wolverine finally decided the situation has escalated enough, and jumped between the two females. "Back off, Jag!"

"She’s hurt, ol’ man. Weak. Frail. She must be culled." She cocked her head to one side, and took a long sniff of the air. Her breath trembled as she released it. "Can’t you smell it on her?"

"Smell what? The kid’s fine. Not a scratch on her." He glanced back, silently willing Jubilee to hold still.

"You’re wrong. She bleeds!" She drops to an offensive stance ready to fight to jump her prize. Her voice dropped frighteningly, nearly a growl. "Let me by, old one. She’s mine. It’s my right." She silently extended her natural claws, and raised up on her haunches ready to pounce on both if necessary.

Wolverine crouched down, ready to deal with whatever had taken residence in Jaguar’s head. "Jubes, run! This could get messy!"

Not having to be told twice, Jubilee made a mad dash out of the clearing. Jaguar’s mind cried out for her to chase after the fleeing prey. Her intense hunger added the final initiative she needed, and she bounded after the girl. The suddenness of the move caught Wolverine off guard, and his lunge to stop her was one nanosecond too late. She slipped past him, and he shouted for Jubilee to move faster. Jaguar saw the prey pulling away, strength lent to the girl by fear, and tried to increase her speed to match. But, the hunger had been denied too long, and she was only just able to keep up. Wolverine skirted through the woods, knowing Jubilee would have to curve back towards the mansion. He took the more direct route, hoping to get in front of Jaguar before she caught up to the kid.

Twigs pulled at Jubilee’s face, arms, and legs as she ran. They scratched her, ripping her clothing in several places, but she paid them no mind. With Jaguar hot on her heels, and acting totally wigged out, she would not stop if Sabretooth himself stood in her way. ~Where’s Wolvie?" She thought ~God, please don’t let her catch me!~ The frightened girl briefly considered turning and fighting, and then she thought back to the Danger Room sessions she’d seen Jaguar take part in. She knew there was no way she could stand up to the violence and speed of the older mutant without somebody’s help. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a flash of yellow and black plaid, recognized Wolverine and thanked her lucky stars as she continued to run.

Jaguar found herself gaining ground on the prey. The smell of fresh blood got stronger and her hunger became pure liquid fire coursing through her veins. The chase had lasted only a few moments, and they were nearing open ground. She could not let that happen, as it would give the prey the advantage. Among the trees, Jaguar was in her element. The prey, stumbling with every other step, fighting the trees and natural paths around her, obviously was not.

Suddenly, Jaguar was thrown sidelong against a tree. Lashing out at the thing that had collided with her, which was still very close, her claws met flesh and she smelled fresh blood from the wounds she inflicted. Her earlier prey forgotten, she turned her attention to the closer meat. The new prey pulled back, clearly ready to fight. Jaguar’s tongue snaked out yet again in anticipation of the fight, and the meal to follow. Her nostrils flared as the blood scent decreased, and she saw the wound she had inflicted disappear. A low buzzing filled her ears, driving her mad with its persistence. She realized her prey was moving its mouth in an attempt to communicate, perhaps pleading for its life. She took the opportunity to attack, leaping full force at Wolverine and knocking him to the ground.

Wolverine pulled back once the driven woman hit him, dragging her across the forest floor in a barely controlled tumble. Jaguar dug her claws deep, using Wolverine’s flesh as her handhold to stay with him while fighting to stop their movement across the forest floor. When they finally rolled to a stop, Wolverine found himself on top of the pile; pinning Jaguar to the ground after ripping her claws from his side. He saw her nostrils flare at the return of the fresh blood, and noticed the look of wild need in her eyes. She bucked violently beneath him, finally flipping him over and switching their positions. Jaguar sat astride Wolverine, holding his arms above his head. Wolverine flipped her off him and threw her against the nearest tree. Nevertheless, Jaguar came bouncing back at him, snarling, and slashing.

Deep within the recesses of her mind, Jaguar’s consciousness screamed to regain control, to stop this battle. But, the blood hunger was fire in her veins, clouding her vision, and building a wall past which she could not get. Only here, in this place did she remember. She had always known that she could go to any means necessary to get what she wanted. Murder had never been presented as an unacceptable option to her. Nevertheless, the true slaughter she had wreaked in the past was trapped deep within the recesses of her mind. Now, though, she remembered it all – the times her grandfather had denied her what he knew she needed, then given her a grown man to feed her hunger. She saw the blood, remembered the relish with which she had ripped into the man’s throat or whatever appendage she could latch onto, the struggle that would invariably ensue, and how much more that had thrilled her. The taste of flesh every time was better than the last and the hunger had only grown with the experiments over the years. The longer she was forced to go without, the more often she needed a fix, and the greater the quantity of blood she needed just to survive. By the time she was six she needed fresh, raw meat at least once a day to stop the rages.

After her mother’s death, and with years of not denying herself anything, her body had finally readjusted and Jaguar had developed the ability to control her hunger when the need arose. Sometimes, though, she pushed herself too far and the hunger would take over, driving her to massacre any living creature she could get her hands on. Without fail, if she denied herself too long she would awake with no memory of what she had done, but thoroughly sated. This was one of those times. And yet, it was different this time somehow. Possibly because she personally knew her quarry now. She hadn’t been aware of herself when she was going for Jubilee, hadn’t come to any conscious awareness until she was sitting astride Wolverine, ready to rip out his throat. It hit her then, she had hesitated, and Wolverine had taken the pause to flip her off, and gain a slight upperhand. Yet, she could not stop herself all together, the hunger controlled her and she knew she could not fight it. Unless some miracle occurred, she would not regain conscious control of herself until her hunger was satisfied.

Wolverine recognized the moment’s pause in Jaguar’s actions and briefly believed he was getting through to her. Then, the next moment, she was fighting, just as hard and fast as the first time. He had fought with her before, seen how fiery and driven she could be, but he had never had so much trouble holding her off. It was almost as if he was fighting a fully unpredictable animal. As his daughter knocked him off his feet and they broke into a battle of tooth and claw for a few moments, the sheer randomness of her attack struck him even more. Just then, he found himself flying towards a tree, and stopped thinking all together. All he could do from that point on was concentrate on the fight and hope Jubilee thought enough to send someone else out, or that someone would hear the fight and come to investigate.

Chapter 5

Sabretooth spent the entire morning working off steam. Jaguar’s temper had been getting worse by the day and she had hardly said two words to him the past week. The past two days had been a hundred times worse, what with her refusing to even sleep anywhere near him. She still had not resorted to sleeping outside, like she would when truly pissed off, but she had started sleeping on the couch. That morning, he had made the mistake of suggesting she take some Midol and learn how to deal like the rest of the world’s females. Of course, that had brought a stream of curses and promises of bodily damage that would make Lucifer shudder with fear. Pride not allowing him to back off and leave her be, Sabretooth had leaped at the chance to finally tell her off right. He had recognized something undefinable in her eyes just before Jean contacted the charged woman telepathically to inform her she was late for a training session. Jaguar had promised him that she would finish their fight as soon as she got back from "more important" things. He had not even bothered trying to stop her, not really wanting to taste her claws that morning. Instead, he’d resorted to manual labor, namely smashing anything he could get his hands on, then forcing himself to fix it.

Nearly three hours after starting his tirade, Sabretooth stopped, catching wind of something that set his nerves on end. In the back of his mind, he connected the odd scent to some previous instance, but was unable to fully place it. Therefore, he had begun pacing around the perimeter of the mansion. It was at this point that Jubilee ran into him, literally. He’d started to curse her for not watching where she was going, but had then seen the young mutant’s wild-eyes, smelled her fear and sweat-drenched body. He grabbed her upper arms, pulled her up to look straight into her eyes and growled at her to tell him what was wrong.

Jubilee gulped down a scream when Sabretooth grabbed her and growled for her to tell him what was wrong. "It’s…it’s…Jaguar!", she gasped breathlessly. "She’s…gone crazy! Tried…to kill… us!"

Sabretooth hissed, dropped her on the spot and ran off in the direction Jubilee had come from. He shouted back at her, "Get the damn team, and some meat, the bloodier, the better!"