Lanie's Majestic Adventure

~~~Chapter One: Thank God for Ill-tempered Deans!~~~

It was a cold winter day in Rock Island County. Lanie awoke around 12 pm. Peering at the window, just inches from her face she could see the dripples of water running down the glass left behind from the cold frosty morn. About this time her phone began to ring, the ringing was almost remeniscent of a blood-curdling scream you would hear in a horror flick. Alarmed by the telephone she jumped and reached to her nightstand to grab the phone in which it appeared literally to be ringing off the hook!

She grabbed the phone and nuzzled it up to her ear and with a husky voice said "Hello," and was very surprized to hear the nerve-racking voice of Mr. Talbot, The Dean of the Junior collage she was attending on the other end.

With an almost eeary tempo Mr. Talbot replied with a stern voice, "May I speak with Miss McCarthy?".

Very hestitantly Lanie said, "Yes, yes this is she."

At that moment Mr. Talbot began to rant and rave about how Lanie had been missing classes all semister and this behavior would no longer be tolerated.

Lanie could barely get a word in edge-wise when Mr. Talbot bluntly blurted out, "Miss McCarthy I have no choice but to expell you from our educational instituion."

Lanie tryed and tryed to plead with Mr. Talbot but he was very insistant on sticking to his guns about this! He did tell her that she would be refunded the rest of her tuition and should recieve a check within a few days. He also stated that she had 2 weeks to to move out of her dormatory. Lanie hung up the phone, and in disbelief laid back on her bed and started to think back to when she had started at the school. She could recall her Father stating that he had paid a fortune to get her into this prestigious school.

With a check coming in her name, Lanie was sure that she was about to recieve a king's ransom and ideas just started to fill her sleepy head! First she thought about getting a new car. The rusted old 1976 Volkswagon Bug wasn't exactly a carriage fitted for a queen! But after a moment she dimished that thought from her head, after all that car had so many memories. "How many girls could say that they had lost their viginity to Tony Valentino while listening to Dr. Ruth on an am radio?" she thought.

Then she started to brainstorm. She had to find some shelter when none other than John McCarthy, her not so subtle father found out about this. The words "Vacation, Vacation!" kept filling her mind. But where would she go? She thought about Spain, but she had failed her Spanish class and couldn't speak the language. Then it dawned on her: Australia!!!!



~~~Chapter Two: Lanie's Departure!~~~

It was 2 am Thursday morning and there Lanie sat in the middle of O'Hare airport in Chicago. It seemed that she had been there for days but, just as that thought crossed her mind she heard over the loud speaker "Flight 217 to Sydney now departing at gate 16."

A moment of great anticipation came over her and she got the chills, she had never been out of the country before......hell she'd never been out of state before without a companion! But like a soldier she stomped herself to the gate and boarded the plane.

She was seated next to some fat, bald guy who seemed to have a problem controlling his body functions. But she was determined to make to Australia without dying in what seemed to be a perpetual gas chamber in the sky. Nothing was left for the imagination when she made a pit-stop to the commode where she found a middle-aged couple joining the "mile-high" club. It seemed nothing was going right on this flight.

She thought to herself, "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all?" Everything on this trip thus far must be some kind of omen. But none the less there was no turning back now.....she had no idea that what was about to happen within only a few short days would forever change her life. But there was still 6 1/2 more hours left of the flight, so she decided to try to get some shut eye and pray that her luck would change once she stepped foot on the rich with culture soil of Australia.......she had no idea that God may have been listening to her prayers after all!



~~~Chapter Three: The Beginning of Lanie's Majestic Journey!~~~

Well, the plane had landed on schedule in Sydney and Lanie was really weary but she knew she had to catch a commutor to get to her destination, the Gold Coast.

She trotted over to the baggage pickup where she was greeted by a very handsome man. "G'day mate! May I see your ticket please" the man stated.

Lanie thought to herself "Wow I wonder if he has a girlfriend?" Then reality set in that she was leaving to catch a commutor in 5 minutes and probably would never see this guy again.

She got her baggage then was approached by a little Chinese man who asked her "Are you Lanie McCarthy?"

She anwered with a smile and said, "Yes I am."

The little man introduced himself as Zeus and curtiously took her bags and said, "Follow me, Madam."

They made many stops on their way, barely exchanging any words except statements such as "Are you hungry?" or "May have light for my smoke?"

Lanie was a bit puzzled by all the stops they were making. It must have been 7 stops already. She didn't want to seem pushy but she indeed did pay a great deal for this trip and thought she deserved at least a valid answer. When she asked Zeus why they kept stopping he plainly stated that the commutor van they were using was a piece of junk and that they needed to stop in Newcastle and get some repairs done.

Lanie didn't mean to have an outburst but she hollered without hestitation, "What the hell do you mean repairs? Do you fucking realize how much money I spent on this trip?"

Zeus looked back at her in dismay and said without a bit of pity in his voice, "My dear I don't control everything and I'm sure that the commutor company will be more than happy to reinverse you for any of your misfortunes."

The rest of the trip to Newcastle was without any words between Lanie and Zeus . Which was fine by Lanie, it took every ounce of her being not to mock the little Chinese man by saying "Wax on, wax off!"

They finally reached Newcastle and all Lanie wanted to do was get something to eat and go to sleep. Zeus kindly offered to take her to the finest beach front hotel in Newcastle....all expense paid. Well, how could she resist?

She arrived at the hotel, got her things in order, cleaned up, and headed for the Hotel lounge to grab a bite to eat. She was seated at a table for one. Lanie felt so stupid sitting in this restaraunt all by herself but she thought "What the hell I'll make do, and if not, I'll find the next man and ride him all the way to the Gold Coast."

She turned her head to the right and with great surprize she saw all the members of silverchair sitting across from her with an older man.



Chapter 4 - The ending.
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