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LIU Timeline
- 2755 B.C.- First official documentation of toilets in Egyptian Society
- 2754 B.C.- Practice of lowering the toilet seat is instituted.
- 2500 B.C.- The Pharoahs submit to the status quo and enforce strict “lowering of the lid” laws. Offenses were punishable by death, and there enforcement began the road of tyranny that has ensued.
- 2360 B.C.- Pharoah Pepi I attempts to overthrow the tyrannical laws. He is assassinated by his wife.
- 1750 B.C.- Hammurabi establishes Law Code, under the advice of his advisors he removes the “Fourth Law” or the “Leave It Up” law. Scholars still speculate about whether it was his advisors or wife.
- 1600 B.C.- Various Freedom Fighters attempt to undo Hammurabi’s mistake by overthrowing the powers that be and instituting L.I.U. Laws, they are overthrown. The status quo is maintained for the next 1600 years.
- 45 B.C.- Caesar returns to Rome and intends to liberate the masses by instituting “L.I.U.” laws. The resentment of him grows in the senate, where many of the senators are “pussy whipped”
- 44 B.C.- Caesar is stabbed repeatedly by friends, who feel his reforms are “too much too fast”. With this great patriot’s death our movement suffers an almost insurmountable blow.
- 43 B.C.- After Caesar’s death early L.I.U. members are hunted down and forced into the games of the coliseum. It is a dark time for those in our movement as they are forced underground. Many retreat out of Rome and find themselves allied with various barbarian tribes of the north. These new alliances will prove instrumental in the fall of the Roman Empire as these tribes to the north find the act of leaving it down disgusting.
- 576 A.D.- Rome falls under the constant sacking by the barbarian hordes. A whole generation of L.I.U.’ers see the dreams of their ancestors come true. Success will not last long however.
- 800 A.D.- Charlemagne establishes the Holy Roman Empire. To the surprise of many L.I.U.’ers he reinstitutes the Leave it Down laws. The struggle begins anew.
- 1066 A.D.- The invasion of England by William the Conquerer gives rise to new hope in the now virtually wiped out LIU. The brief hope is fleeting however as William is only concerned with a land grab.
- 1215 A.D.- King John signs the Magne Carta, thus empowering the noble class with the ability to execute those who Leave It Up. Of course the document contains many important clauses that are of benefit to society, but they are miniscule thanks to the even stricter rules enforced on the LIU.
- 1337 A.D.- Edward III of England begins the Hundred Years War. Although history has reported the war to be about ascension to the throne of France this is a lie. The English and French fought an epic battle about whether or not to Leave It Up. In the end the Status Quo was maintained and the LIU retreated to the shadows.
- 1603 A.D.- A group of settlers arrives in the “New World” escaping religious persecution and among other things the vicious “Leave It Down” laws of Europe. The New World LIU’ers are free to celebrate bathroom freedom, but not for long.
- 1620 A.D.- The Pilgrims arrive in New England and with them the same strict laws of the old country. It isn’t long before America is under the spell of Leaving It Down.
- 1776 A.D.- Thomas Jefferson and a few other founding fathers write the “Declaration of Independence, at the last minute Ben Franklin’s idea to add a section about Leaving it Up is stricken. Would that he weren’t sick when it was written our countries’ history may have been much different today.
- 1788 A.D.- The United States is formed, and once again Franklin is overruled when he suggests the 2nd amendment should be about “Leaving It Up”. Instead the founding fathers opt for some nonsense about the Right to Bear Arms.
- 1820 A.D.- President Monroe writes the “Monroe Doctrine” it states that Europe has no rights in our hemisphere. He also added clauses about the LIU and their freedoms but these are repressed and never make it in any history books.
- 1860 A.D.- The darkest time in our great organizations history. Some well intentioned LIU’ers side with the South in the war of Secession. Their motives were driven by an agreement with Jefferson Davis, who promised the LIU an area out west where they could live in freedom. During the course of the war not a single LIU member was ever taken prisoner instead they were shot on sight. After the war things got much worse and the LIU went into hiding.
- 1898 A.D.- The Spanish- American War begins. The LIU comes out of hiding in order to fight alongside the Union, hoping they will be rewarded for their patriotism. They are tolerated for a number of years until the Red Scare of the 1920’s
- 1916 A.D.- WWI breaks out. The face of Europe is changed forever.
- 1917 A.D.- Lenin and the Bolsheviks win the Russian Revolution and move Russia to a communist government. Although they do not condone communism the LIU is happy to report that Lenin abolishes all “Leave It Down” laws.
- 1920’s A.D. – The Red scare engulfs America. Thanks to Lenin’s abolishment of unjust laws many LIU’ers are targeted and imprisoned.
- 1933 A.D.- Adolf Hitler assumes control of Germany. Immediately LIU’ers attempt to form a resistance movement. They are quickly eliminated.
- 1939 A.D.- WWII begins and the LIU races to assist those in need. They stay in the fight for the entire war and fight valiantly. When the war is over however they are not welcomed to their respective homes.
- 1948 A.D.- The formation of the State of Israel. LIU’ers attempt to enter but are expelled as heathens. They remain homeless for the next 50 years and most are imprisoned or worse…until…
- 2001 A.D. Three young men with a dream and an inordinate amount of time on their hands pour over every book they can to find some explanation for the way they feel. During their studies they are met by an old troll who educates them in the ways of the LIU and tasks them to carry on the fight. They undertake the task without question and have pledged to do so in order to make the world LEAVE IT UP!!!
