DeeDee - Archangel of Whimsy
Deedee: Archangel of Whimsy
Yeah, that’s right.
Deedee is the littlest Archangel. Literally. She was elevated to her office only yesterday. No, really. Yesterday. As in the day before today. As far as you know.
Deedee is one of the cutest and most endearing archangels, and probably the most infuriating Archangel, in heaven. Not only because of what she does, but because everything about her is just... so... confusing. It’s even rumored that she can befuddle Yves.
Briefly.
When she manifests, Deedee tends to take the form of a young, thin blond human girl, about ten years old, with pigtails, although she’s been known to appear as an even younger child, almost toddler-like, dressed in a too-big shirt and towing around a red balloon. In truth, however, the word “variable” does not do justice to her.
History
Deedee’s history, like so much else about her, is clouded in ineffability. The official story is that she was a young servitor of Destiny who showed remarkable aptitude and potential for many years, while taking on many assignments crucial to Yves’ work.
Surprisingly, you won’t find many Seraphim telling that story. Rumors are more fun, anyway.
One popular rumor has it that, one day about a century ago, there was a sudden *SPRONGG* in the Symphony, and Deedee simply appeared at the bottom of Jacob’s Ladder, as an Archangel, ready for duty.
Another, more interesting rumor has Eli redeeming a renegade Mercurian of Dark Humor, returning from his walkabout long enough to sneak her into the Seraphim Council chambers while no one was looking, and exposing her to the Light of Heaven, from which she emerged not only forgiven, but stronger.
A third rumor suggests that perhaps all three previous stories of Deedee’s origins are true.
Dissonance
It is dissonant for any servitor of Whimsy to injure a human through their application of their particular brand of humor. To tell a “mean” joke.
Word
Whimsy confuses people, in humorous, but benign ways. Whimsy’s servitors (generally referred to by Deedee as “you Sillies!”) do things which, seemingly, make very little sense and have very little to do with the War. They confuse the small-h hell out of everyone – but somehow things always seem to turn out well.
Attunements
Seraphim- Whimsy’s Seraphs tell Truths in rhyme. And they do it all the time.
Cherubim- Deedee’s Cherubs instinctively know the most amusing way to utilize any object as an improvisational prop.
Ofanites- Whimsy’s Wheels add their corporeal forces to any roll involving movement in a particularly odd manner, from Silly Walks to driving a clown car.
Elohim- know precisely what it will take to thoroughly confuse any particular human. To shift a paradigm without a clutch.
Malakites- Deedee’s few Malakim are the Ultimate Straight Men. They can perform the oddest acts without loss of honor.
Kyriotates- Are already confusing, but Whimsy’s can gift their hosts with the physical resilience of a cartoon character for a number of minutes equal to ½ their corporeal forces.
Mercurians- Are surrealistic stand-up comics who can spellbound an audience for a period of minutes equal to their ethereal forces. Laughter-induced spasms or headaches arising from confusion do not count as harm.
Invocation modifiers
+1 a Monty Python episode on DVD
+2 a surrealist painting by a non-surrealist painter
+3 30 confused people
+4 a plague of ladybugs
+5 a 3-D recreation of an Escher drawing
+6 a ‘333' on a 3d6 roll
+7 calling ‘edge’ on a coin toss – and it happens.
Superior Opinions
It’s not surprising that opinions about Deedee were quick to form. They seem to run the gamut from bemused tolerance to pulling-out-hair frustration.
But then again, you’ll have that.
Blandine – She is... comforting, in an odd sort of way, and humans she visits generate... interesting... dreamscapes.
Dream long, love true, sometimes things return to you.
Christopher – Heh. Aheh. You ever see that look babies get when a butterfly lands on their nose? That’s Deedee.
Oh, I love him so. Children don’t need to be confused. They have a constant state of wonder that’s better than anything. Keep it alive.
David – This won’t do. She’s entirely too frivolous.
Dude. You run around NAKED. And I’m frivolous?
Dominic – Dangerously unstable. I am not amused.
No one who owns a kitten can not have a sense of whimsy. He just keeps it bottled up. If I can give Dommie one True chuckle, it will be worth all of this.
Eli – Dude. It’s a contact high. So cool.
w00t! Say, you! People should trust Eli’s judgement more... I’m just sayin’.
Gabriel – She is not cruel. If she were cruel I would be angry I am not angry, therefore she is not cruel. GO AWAY.
I understand. It hurts very muchly. It’s not her fault! I will try to help her, if I can.
Janus – This wasn’t my idea. Honestly. If I didn’t know better, I’d think she was after MY job.
Ch-ch-ch-ch-change... Mutability good. If I wanted your job, would I have to steal it?
Jean – Curious. She seems to possess the Calabite resonance – at least, around my laboratory. She is a chaos nexus that bears further scrutiny.
*Cocks eyebrow in a Spockish kind of way* Fascinating. Logic is a bunch of pretty flowers... that smell bad.
Jordi – Confuse-a-cat Limited. Need I say more?
Woof, Meow, MOO! I talk to the dolphins, if it gets his attention.
Khalid – The Will of Allah is truly mysterious. Very much so, in this case. But yes, of course Allah can laugh.
Faith manages. Somebody said that once. I think she had a bone in her head.
Laurence – She’s disrupted everything. Nevertheless, our morale is up, and Hell’s efficiency is down, wherever she’s involved. I admit I don’t understand. Is it required?
Ooh, you’re CUTE! Go on, admit it, ‘Life of Brian’ was funny.
Marc – Can’t say I’m familiar with her. What was it you said she does again?
*Yawn!* Pork bellies are up! Pants are down! Bishops are diagonal!
Michael – She irritates the Hyena. That’s enough. Beyond that, she may be evidence that Yves is losing it. Still... she has a nice smile.
*swoon* Hunk-o-rama! I have all his posters on my wall, wanna see? I’m president of his fan club!
Novalis – Ah. Hrm. Yes. Well, at least she’s on our side.
She’s sooo nice. I’m twitterpainted!
Yves – She is... what she is. What is to be done?
I yam what I yam. Uck-uck-uck-uck!
Zadkiel – She doesn’t need protection from demons. They need protection from her.
Little stifle-ly. Nice, though. Laughs when I drop anvils on Demons.
Princely Opinions
Alaemon – I think she’s a plant. Don’t ask me who she’s really working for...
I think he’s a plant. Specifically, a rutabega. BUT... *sings* I know a se-cret...
Andrealphus – Come here, little girl. I’ve got some nice, hard... candy...
*rolls her eyes* As IF. Pervyboy needs a spanking. And not the kind he usually gets.
Asmodeus – It is... troubling, to deal with someone who makes up the rules of the Game as she goes. Calvinball. Need I say more?
... He doesn’t play well with others.
Baal – Her antics are slightly more annoying than Kobal’s. Primarily because I don’t understand them.
Wet noodle. Mike is welcome to him.
Beleth – I will find something Whimsy fears. I will.
Fear fears truth, from up above... Fear fears laughter, fear fears love. I fear... anvils, from a dove.
Belial – Let’s see if being burned is funny.
Gallon of gasoline: $1.80. Lighter, $2.10. Setting yourself on fire because you are a demonic butt-monkey: Priceless.
Fleurity – Am I supposed to care about whimsy? I can get joy for you wholesale.
Pshaw! I can get high spinning! I think somebody’s killed too many brain cells.
Furfur – Don’t @#$*ing talk to be about that %$#@, Right?
Aww, was somebody’s stash of AK-47's secretly replaced with SuperSoakers? Might want to talk to Valefor about that...
Haagenti – A light snack, nothing more.
Look! The Tasmanian devil! But more pathetic!
Kobal – ... arrgh!!...
*blows raspberry*
Kronos – An annoying little gadfly, to be swatted.
Well, ‘e’s me primary target, innit? If ‘e’s upset, I’m doin’ me job!
Lilith – She may be the freest Archangel. And her Need... hrm... what is “Wibble?”
She’d look so much better in a long, flowing gown... and a pointy crown... carrying a torch... in New York harbor... work on that, will you?
Malphas – Nobody understands surrealistic comedy. Except you, of course, those others are such fools...
You want to monkeywrench Hell? Get Malphas talking to himself.
Nybbas – Monty Python is so ‘70's. I didn’t get it then. Not happening.
Thinks he’s hip, which makes him squarer than anyone. ‘Lookit, pa! I’m desperate for attention!’
Saminga – I don’t get it. Nobody dies.
It’s not funny if I have to explain it. How did this big dummy get a Word?
Valefor – You tell me if you see her. You tell me NOW, you hear? One of her teams ‘tidied up’one of my tethers, and I can’t find anything!!!
Hey, Vallie! We need more lupins! And a shrubbery!
Vapula – NYAGH! Keep her OUT of my LABORATORY!
Hi, Dex–OOH! What’s THIS button do? *KABLAM*