“Come in,” Kathryn Janeway said looking up from the report she was reading to see her first officer Chakotay step in side her door looking awfully nervous. “Yes?” she asked him smiling.
“Um Captain here’s that report you wanted,” he told her walking over to her desk to hand it to her.
“Thanks,” she replied setting it down on the pile of reports she still had to read and noticing he wasn’t leaving asked, “Is there anything else?”
“Well, yeah, kind of do you think you could read it now?” he asked her shyly.
Raising one eyebrow she said, “I guess so, what’s so important about it?”
“You’ll see,” he replied smiling and then added, “can we sit on your couch?”
“Sure,” she told him sighing wondering why he was so nervous and why she had to read the report now. He reached out a hand to help her up and she couldn’t help smiling at him but when he didn’t let her hand go and instead slid his fingers in between hers she began to worry. He sat down first and all most pulled her down on his lap but she managed to sit down right beside him instead and started to look at the report he had given her, with her expression quickly turning to shock when she read;
Shameless
Well I’m shameless when it comes to loving you
I’ll do anything you want me to
I’ll do anything at all
And I’m standing here for all the world to see
Oh baby, that’s what’s left of me
Don’t have very far to fall
You know now I’m not a man who has ever been
Insecure about the world I’ve been living in
I don’t break easy, I have my pride
But if you need to be satisfied
I’m shameless, oh honey, I don’t have a prayer
Every time I see you standin’ there
I go down upon my knees
And I’m changing, swore I’d never compromise
Oh, but you convinced me otherwise
I’ll do anything you please
You see in all my life I’ve never found
What I couldn’t resist, what I couldn’t turn down
I could walk away from anyone I ever knew
But I can’t walk away from you
I never let anything have this much control over me
I work too hard to call my life my own
And I’ve made myself a world and it’s worked to perfectly
But it’s your world now, I can’t refuse
I’ve never had so much to lose
Oh, I’m shameless
You know it should be easy for a man who’s strong
To say he’s sorry or admit when he’s wrong
I’ve never lost anything I’ve ever missed
But I’ve never been in love like this
It’s out of my hands
I’m shameless, I don’t have the power now
I don’t want it anyhow
So I got to let it go
I’m shameless, shameless as a man can be
You can make a total fool of me
I just wanted you to know
Oh, I’m shameless, I just wanted you to know
Oh, I’m shameless, Oh, I’m down on my knees…shameless
Chakotay could see the shock clearly on her face, as she looked up at him her mouth slightly open in an O shape, eyes wide. “The great Kathryn Janeway is speech less for once!” he said smiling picking up both of her hands in his and continued, “Well then I guess I should take this opportunity to tell you exactly how I feel about you.” Taking a deep breath he looked her in the eyes and started, “I love you more then anything else in existence. You are the reason I am alive. I wake up each morning just because I know that I will be blessed to hear your voice and see your face. Every time I see you I fall in love with you all over again. I’d do anything you want me to do just to see your smile because to me you’re everything. You are the woman of my dreams in every way. I can’t promise you I’ll never leave you because that would be a lie, but I can promise you’ll always be the one that I love more then life itself and you’ll always be in my heart.”
She jerked her head as if coming out of a trance and was about to speak when her com badge beeped, “Torres to Janeway.”
She pulled her hands away from his and said, “Janeway here, go ahead.”
“Sorry to bother you Captain but I was wondering if you would like to join me for lunch today?” B’Elanna said.
“Yes! When?” she said a little to excitedly.
“Well now,” she heard in reply.
“Great I’ll see you in the mess hall. Janeway out,” Kathryn said and jumped up from the couch and ran to the door exiting as fast as she could leaving Chakotay to wonder what had just happened.
“Thank god you called me when you did B’Elanna,” Kathryn told her as they sat down at a table putting their trays in front of them with what they dared called food on them.
“Oh and why’s that Captain?” B’Elanna asked her raising one eyebrow up.
“Kathryn,” she said.
“Ok Kathryn why was it so great that I contacted you when I did?” she asked her. Kathryn started telling her everything that had happened in her ready room.
“Really?” B’Elanna asked shocked.
“No B’Elanna I’ve made it all up! Yes of coarse really!” Kathryn said laughing.
“Wow, that’s great, but I’m confuse why was it so great I beeped you at that time?” she asked her frowning.
“Because I don’t know what I was going to say, I probably would have said something stupid or brought up protocol,” Kathryn said sighing.
“Ah, so what are you going to do?” B’Elanna asked her.
“I don’t know, do you think I should tell him how I feel about him?” she asked sighing.
“Yes! But you’ve better have decide fast because here he comes,” B’Elanna said smiling at Kathryn’s shocked expression, as he walked up to their table looking extremely nervous again.
“Mind if I join you?” Chakotay asked shyly.
“Not at all, you can have my seat I was just leaving,” B’Elanna told him smiling, ignoring the death glare she was receiving for Kathryn. “I’ll talk to you later,” she said walking away.
They just sat there for a little while. Kathryn was poking at her food sometimes eating bits and pieces and Chakotay was watching her sometimes opening his mouth to say something but backing out and eating some of his food instead. Finally getting enough courage to speak he said, “Kathryn, what I said in your ready room was all very true I do love you more then anything else in the universe. And I was wondering if you would come to dinner at me quarters tonight so we can talk about it some more.”
Looking up she sat her fork down and said, “Yes I’d like that. I guess we should talk about it some more.”
“Great, so stop by at around 18 hundred hours, and it’s casual,” he told her smiling.
“Okay I’ll be there, I’ve better be going,” she said getting up from the table.
“I’ll walk you to the bridge,” he said starting to get up.
“No! I mean you don’t have to, I need to stop by engineering first and everything so I’ll just see you later,” she told him fidgeting.
“Okay, bye,” he told her with a confused expression on his face.
“Yeah, bye,” she said walking away from him in a hurry dumping her tray in the recycler and walking out the doors.
“So you’re going to dinner at his quarters tonight?” B’Elanna asked Kathryn. She had gone straight down and told B’Elanna everything that had just happened.
“Yes,” Kathryn said sighing.
“What are you going to wear?” she asked her. “
I don’t know!” Kathryn said, “Oh great thanks for giving me something else to worry about!”
“Sorry come on you need to get ready I’ll help you find something to wear and everything.” B’Elanna said grabbing Kathryn’s arm and started walking towards Kathryn’s quarters.
Chakotay heard his door chime at exactly 18 hundred hours smiling he walked over to the door and opened it to see Kathryn standing casually in a dark blue dress which barely went down to her knees with matching shoes and with her hair pulled back in a tight bun. She looked at him and smiled and he forgot how to breath because he was so taken back by how beautiful she looked.
“Do I get to come in?” she asked him stifling a laugh.
All he could do was nod and step out of her way after what seemed like forever he found his voice and said, “You look fabulous.”
“Thanks, I have to admit B’Elanna helped me get ready.” she said smiling at him.
He smiled back and asked, “Shall we start?”
“Yes I guess so,” she said walking over to the table. He walked behind her and pulled out her chair and pushed it in when she sat down nodding her thanks he went over and got two plates from the replicator.
“Want to go sit on the couch?” Chakotay asked Kathryn as he recycled the plates and left over food.
“Yeah,” she replied getting up from the table and walking over to his couch sitting down near the end.
He walked over and sat next to her and was about to start talking when she interrupted him, “What do you want?”
“What do you mean?” he asked her looking at her confused.
“I mean what do you want us to do, continue as if nothing ever happened or…” she trailed off.
“Well I want what ever you want,” he told her taking her hand in his.
“We’re not talking about what I want, I asked you want YOU want,” she told him, bringing her other hand to rest on top of his.
“Well I want us to become a couple,” he told her looking down at her hands caressing them with his and intertwining their fingers together smiling at how perfectly they fit together. Still smiling he looked up to see that she was looking at him and asked, “What about you?”
“I,” she started but then stopped as if thinking about something and said, “Computer play Janeway beta 12,” and looked back at him smiling at his confusion. Seeing that he was opening his mouth to say something she pulled her hand away from his and put one finger against his lips.
Chakotay brought his hand up to hold hers kissing each of her fingers, then her palm and slowly kiss moving down to her wrist when she said, “Did you just hear any of the song that I played?” Smiling he shook his head no and kissed her wrist again. Shaking her head she pulled her hand back away from him.
“What?” he questioned innocently.
“Nothing, now would you care to listen to the song?” she asked him.
“Yes,” he said, “but only if I can have this dance.”
“Fine,” she said and then added, “you know you’re making this very difficult don’t you?”
“Sorry, computer play Janeway beta 12, pause,” he said getting up taking her hand and helping her up as he did so. Walking over to the middle of the floor he slid his arms around her waist and pulled her close to him, smiling as she slid her arms around his neck and cuddled up against his chest and said, “Computer resume.” As they turned in circles he listened to the words of the song;
It’s undeniable that we should be together
It’s unbelievable how I used to say that I’d fall never
The basis is need to know if you don’t know just how I feel
Then let me show you now that I’m for real
If all things in time, time will reveal
(Chorus)
One, you’re like a dream come true
Two, just want to be with you
Three, its plane to see you’re the only one for me
And four, repeat steps one through three
Five, make you fall in love with me
If ever I believe my work is done then I’ll start back at one
It’s so incredible the way things work them selfs out
And all emotional once you know what it’s all about, hey
And undesirable for us to be a part
I never would have made it very far
Cause you know you hold that keys to me heart
(Chorus)
Say farewell to the dark of night I see the coming of the light
I feel like a little child whose life had just begun
You come and breathed new life, into this lonely heart of mine
You threw out the lifeline just in the nick of time
(Chorus out)
“Does that mean you love me too?” he whispered into her ear.
“Yes, it’s just I can’t say it I’m sorry,” she said leaning in closer to him.
“It’s okay, I understand and we can take this as slow or as fast as you want,” he replied, “can we go back to the couch and cuddle?” he asked shyly.
She couldn’t help her self so she laughed in reply gasping for air she managed to say, “Sorry.”
“I’m glad I amuse you so much Kathryn,” Chakotay said pulling away from her and walking back over to the couch to sit down.
“I’m,” she started just barley managing not to laugh any more and started to catch her breath, “sorry really I am,” she said walking over and sitting down next to him. “Forgive me?” she asked him.
“Of course,” he told her sliding his arms around her waist and pulled her so that her back was resting against his chest and leaning his head down to start kissing her neck working his way slowly down to her shoulder.
“I thought you wanted to cuddle,” she said tilting her head so he could have a better position.
“I’ve changed my mind,” he said between kisses, “don’t you like this better though?”
“Um uh,” she said then sighed and added, “I really should be going.”
“Do you have to?” he asked bringing his head back up and tightening his grip around her waist.
“Yes I’m afraid so,” she said starting to get up.
“You could always stay here,” he said loosening his grip so she could pull away.
“Maybe,” she said, “a little later in our relationship. If that’s okay with you.”
“Yes, that’s fine, I don’t mean to rush you or anything,” he said getting up to walk her to her door.
“I know, and don’t get me wrong, I want to stay but not on the first night,” she told him turning around to look him in the eyes once they reached her door. And then keyed in her access code stepping inside.
“Good night my love,” he told her leaning toward to give her a kiss on the cheek.
“Night,” she said and walked in her quarters watching him leave to go back to his as the door closed. Just then she heard her door chime and she went to open it surprised to see B’Elanna standing there pushing her self inside saying, “I want to know everything that happened!”
