Due to 'legal difficulties' and government competition, HitMEN FOR OTHERS can no longer kill people for profit. It is quite depressing really, we had such nice methods...
...from the simple...
...to the complicated......and everything in between...

Ah! The good old days, but that is over with now. The government did ("at least") give us another option for our business...yes, the next worst possible form of torture...



...that's right...Pies!!! We will pie the victim of your choice to the point of unconsciousness for the low fee of $1000.
You can even choose the type (or types) of pie with which you want your victim of choice pied with. Pie choices
And here are some quotes from some very satisfied customers...