Approximately 1/8 of a minute later they were both sprawled on the surface of closest approximation of biblical hell as you were likely to find, surrounded by the wreckage of their ship. Only a foot away lay the automatic cushioning system, which had activated to cushion a fall of more that 6 feet, but unfortunately the only thing saved were a pair of corny plastic palm trees. A short way away from the site of the crash, three of the beings from the ship of their attackers were lurking, grumbling about hazard on the job and lack of workers’ compensation. Luckily for Mike and Aara, they were still out cold and were spared the trial of having to immediately observe their captors. The beings, in short, looked most like miniatures of their ship; lumpy, hairy, and fierce. “Look like spies to me,” a random alien who was not Bill Clinton decided.
“very stupid spies,” replied another un-Bill
“I wonder what they want,” pondered the third.
“ I guess we’d better bring them in” said the first, unenthusiastically. This was certainly not the kind of action and excitement he had looked forward to as a wee Hyroomph in Interstellar blood and gore cadets.
Upon entering the bridge, it would be apparent that a great deal of the awfulness on the outside of the vessel was merely for show purposes. Inside, it was quite normal; other than an occasional murderous cry of rage and bloodcurdling screams coming from the ghetto blaster in the corner. Obviously someone’s idea of parlor music. Right smack dab in the middle of the room, in a chair raised to at least three feet above the ground sat a three eyed, mottled brown, lumpy and hairy humanoid figure who was obviously the one giving commands and not taking them. It said, or rather grubbled sneevishly “So you found them” and without waiting for an answer “did you question them” and again paying no heed to the reply or lack of one “I suppose not, what are we going to do with them?” the comment was as it seemed directed at himself and he continued “ Where are they from?” This time he actually waited for an answer and that caught the guard rather off guard and he swiftly spun around from where he had been mixing himself a rather large drink.
“Um ah...... Mulania, I guess, but the female seems to be an inhabitant of Earth.” he stuttered.
“Ouch” said the captain recalling the news that he had heard earlier that day “close one”. The news was that as the clock stuck 12 on December 31st 1999 a time bomb, that he himself had planted 4 billion years previously, had exploded, splitting the highly unpopular planet in two and sending the unfortunate western hemisphere spinning off into space. Rumor had it that the eastern hemisphere was still revolving around the unfashionable sun and that it’s inhabitants were at the moment morning the economic crisis due to the catastrophe.
