Transformers Live Action Movie (2007) Review

Date Released: July 3rd, 2007 (July 2nd in select theaters)
MPAA Rating: PG-13
Starring: Shia LaBeouf, Rachael Taylor, Megan Fox, Tyrese Gibson, Josh Duhamel, John Turturro, Jon Voight, Anthony Anderson, Peter Cullen (voicing Optimus Prime), Hugo Weaving (voicing Megatron)

    Well, it's finally here. After all this time, we Transformers fans FINALLY have a live action movie to call our own! But is it a badly written piece of shiny crud, or something that will grow the fandom and make Transformers mainstream? Well, if the earnings the movie is taking in are any indication, it's the latter. Of course, popularity isn't necessarily an indicator of how good something is. But it certainly is in this case! In short, the Transformers movie is AMAZING, and simply mind-blowing. It's not perfect, but it's very very close, as far as I'm concerned. I'll get to the few small beefs I have with the movie later, but right now I want to gush about the awesomeness of this movie. Eee!
    Firstly-- and this should come as no surprise to those who are familiar with Director Michael Bay's work-- the action scenes are mind-blowing. And that's the understatement of the year right there, folks. To put it more succinctly, the action scenes are the best I have seen in any movie. Ever. Especially the last 30 minutes or so of the flick, during a huge final battle downtown. The amount of destruction is amazing, and weight is given behind every footstep and punch every Transformer makes. Several things are happening at once, to the point where you pretty much HAVE to watch the movie 2 or 3 times just to catch everything. A few people have complained that the camera is a bit TOO shaky and the movement a bit TOO fast, but I only found this happened in one or two shots where multiple Transformers were going at it all at once, where it really SHOULD be absolutely chaotic-- certainly nothing I would complain about. One particular shot I absolutely LOVE is when Ironhide transforms from truck mode and blasts his arm cannons into the ground in slow-motion, propelling him right over a screaming woman in the middle of the street. Simply drool-inducing. The CGI is also the best I've ever seen in a movie-- it's 99% realistic, to be sure. 2 or 3 times during the movie a movement or the way lighting plays off part of the Transformers may seem just a little little off, and that's it. Everything else looks absolutely, 100% real, and fantastic.
    What may be surprising to some, however, is just how good the actual meat of the story and dialogue are. The story is pretty solid, with only a few plot holes, which I'll get to later. Pretty much everything is either explained directly in the movie or can be figured out pretty well with a bit of thought after the movie is over. Some things-- such as the origin of the Allspark-- are purposefully left unexplained to leave them mysterious, of course, but I'd hardly chalk that up to oversight. The dialogue is also dynamite, and often quite ingenious. There are VERY few lines I'd consider off or unoriginal. Some of Megatron's lines, like "Is it fear or courage that compels you?" are especially good, as is the dialogue between him and Prime. All of the Transformers' voices fit their characters to a tee-- Ratchet sounds very professional and doctor-ish; Ironhide sounds like an old warrior; Prime is voiced by his original voice actor so of COURSE he sounds like Prime; Jazz sounds like a streetwise black dude; Megatron sounds really evil, still intellligent and not just a giant monster; and Starscream has a slightly screechier voice than the others, while still sounding appropriate for a being of his size. Frenzy just sounds hilarious, like an Ewok on crack. Barricade is the only one who sounds a little off-- he doesn't sound as evil as his design looks, his voice really needed to be deeper and he needed to talk slower.

    There is, quite surprisingly, a lot of humor in the movie, something that the trailers didn't hint at at all. I'd say the movie is about 30% comedy, in fact, and a few scenes seem to be right out of a Will Ferrell movie (...without Will Ferrell, of course). And with few exceptions, the humor is pretty spot-on and hilarious, especially in regards to Shia LaBeouf (Sam), Megan Fox (Mikaela), and Bumblebee. A few other stars, like Bernie Mac (as a car dealer), have pretty much purely comedic roles. A few choice quotes: "Name's Bobby Bolivia. Like the country, but without the runs" (Used Car Dealer). "You checkin' out my piece, 50 Cent?" (Overbearing police officer to Sam). "I'm not allowed to communicate with you except to... tell you that I'm not allowed to communicate with you" (Sector Seven Agent Simmons to Optimus Prime). Nearly all of the jokes are home runs, with only a few falling a bit into corny territory. In fact, three or four times the humor is just a tad over-the-top to the point where it ruins the mood of the moment because it's just a bit TOO unbelievable, such as when Agent Simmons is forced to take his shirt off and there's a Superman-esque "S7" logo on his undershirt, or when Frenzy tip-toes by a dozen people looking for him even though they should be able to easily see him. There's also a joke that I feel is a bit inappropriate even for a PG-13 movie, given that many kids are no doubt going to be seeing it (though honestly, I wouldn't recommend taking anyone under 10 to see this movie-- there's a reason it's rated PG-13). These few humor flub-ups are the main reasons why a point was taken off the humor portion of the final rating.
    The musical score is also spot on, with beautiful instrumentals throughout the movie, especially during the scenes where all the Autobots except Bumblebee land on Earth and take their disguises. It's exciting, yet epic-- perfectly fitting for a movie about giant alien robots. I hope they release the movie score in addition to the Transformers Soundtrack with the popular bands that they've already put out.
    The characterization, for the most part, is very good-- it doesn't take long to figure out Sam's general personality, as well as most of the other human cast. Optimus Prime, Ironhide, Frenzy, Bumblebee, and Megatron are also characterized very well. However, the other robots in the movie-- and the two soldiers-- tend to have rather one-dimensional personalities (and, in the case, of about half of the Decepticons, never even talk, so they don't really have any personalities whatsoever beyond being mean thugs). Most of this is understandable, as there are many characters in the movie and only so much screentime, and the Decepticons seem plenty evil even without talking in English much, since it's "beneath them," but it's worth noting regardless-- if you're wanting a lot of characterization from the Decepticons, you're not going to get it.
    Also, regarding the plot holes in the movie, there's only three that I could find that I couldn't figure out with a little thinking. One of them is fairly major-- it's never explained how the Autobots and Decepticons know how Archibald Witwicky's glasses are so important, given that none of the humans certainly know their importance, and only Megatron would logically know about the glasses. The other two are rather minor in the grand scheme of things-- it's never explained what happened to the Transformers that the Allspark created in the final battle, and it's never explained how the government was able to keep the huge battle at the end a secret, as Transformers are still unknown to the general public at the end of the movie. Being able to shush a small ground of people I can understand, but thousands? That seems like a bit of a stretch to me. A few other things that seem like plot holes in the movie were either victims of last-minute cutting-- the original cut of the film was a whopping 2 hours, 40 minutes, and had to be cut down further-- or had rather subtle explanations that many didn't pick up on. (The cutting down of the movie is apparent now and then in the rather fast transitions between day and night, as well.) For example, Barricade was originally supposed to be killed by Optimus Prime with a wrecking ball right after Prime dispatched Bonecrusher, but that was cut out late in the production process because they wanted to keep Barricade around for a possible sequel. To explain some other things that many people may miss, according to the movie writers, the reason Bumblebee can talk at the end of the movie is because Ratchet injected his throat with a regenerative product after they meet for the first time on Earth-- hence why Ratchet aims a red laser at Bumblebee's throat and the latter clutches it like he's coughing. Also, the reason why the Allspark turns various Earth machines into hostile robots and neutral robots is because the Allspark creates life, not sentience. Because Earth tech is so far behind Cybertron tech, the robots the Allspark created here were little more than animals.

    Simply put, Transformers is a Transfan's dream come true. Not only does it offer incredible robot-beating-up-robot action, but it's got a pretty solid story, great dialogue, and some pretty nice humor and music, as well. This movie's pretty much got it all-- GO SEE IT. The first time I saw it was the first time I ever got man tears of happiness, dude. Man tears, I tell ya.

Plot: 18/20
Characterization: 8/10
Dialogue: 15/15
Action: 20/20
Humor: 14/15
CGI: 10/10
Musical Score: 10/10

Overall Rating: 95/100 ...Wow.
 

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