Another Space-Time Distortion
Starfleet held a press conference this morning, on the subject of a recent space-time anomaly encountered by a Federation Starship. Apparently, some routine tests triggered a violent reaction which skewed the timeline, creating a paradox which resulted in the destruction of two sectors in the Delta Quadrant.
The resulting feedback-loop means that today is in fact, tomorrow, and tomorrow took place yesterday. Please disregard everything that happened yesterday, do everything today twice, and repeat what you did yesterday tomorrow. Then, reset all chronographs for the stardate 2351.298.
Extra counsellors will be on duty at all medical stations to help those who are experiencing difficulty adjusting. However, remember that you cannot go to a medical station tomorrow unless you went yesterday, and if you go today you must go twice. If you did not go yesterday and cannot go twice today, wait until the day after tomorrow.
