Right, here we go! Fans of "Moondance" will think that the picture is familiar, but alas that was never to be. However, it fits this script, so I'm using it. Something else that amazes me about this one, seeing as how I wrote it, is that not only do I like it, but it's well characterised. And for all those years I said to myself "I'm never going to write a "Frasier" fanfic, it's too difficult"... Hmm... Anyway, take a deep breath and dive right in!
PS: Do I have a crush on a certain character? No... of course not... *snicker*
PPS: Tell me what you think of this at Moondance@mylove.co.uk
Scene One: (Caption on black: "AND THEN THERE WERE TWO". We see the Winnebago driving along, by now far from any type of civilisation. It s a beautiful day and there s no one else on the road. Cut to:
Inside the Winnebago, where Daphne is busy explaining exactly how she found out about his feelings for her. Niles is still driving, and is listening intently to every word, loving every moment of their sitting together.)
DAPHNE: … and that's how it happened. It was your brother who told me, not Roz. But don t you get telling him I told you. I'm in enough trouble already. (Pause.) Poor Roz, taking the blame for all of this.
NILES: Knowing Roz, she ll probably set everybody to rights in her own delightful way.
DAPHNE: Yes. (A slightly awkward moment for them both. Niles has been intending to ask her something for some time.)
NILES: I was wondering, actually, and you'll hate me for asking, but -
DAPHNE: (Interrupts him.) I could never hate you. (She smiles at him.)
NILES: (Visibly melting. Aww.) Oh... well, uh, I was wondering when you realised that you felt the same. I know it's not a particularly decent thing to ask, considering, but-
DAPHNE: It's all right. I'll tell you. (She contemplates this query for a few seconds and then answers him.) I think it might have been at Christmas. There was that mix-up with the presents, if you remember. I thought you'd actually bought me jewellery - I didn't realise you d fallen out with Mel - and I was panicking, so I asked Roz for advice. She told me to tell you, face to face, that I wasn't interested, that I had someone else. That was what I was going to do on the balcony - we're not having much luck with those lately! - but then you offered me your jacket, like the gentleman you are. (The driver s side window is open, so he briefly interrupts her.)
NILES: Are you cold? I could shut the window.
DAPHNE: No, I'm all right. Anyway, there was something about the way you put it around my shoulders; it was so... well… lovingly, and then I knew Dr. Crane had been telling me the truth. You were in love with me, I could see it in your eyes. The more I thought about it, the more obvious it became and the more I couldn't believe I hadn't noticed before. I thought back over the past few months, about that time I went to see you about my premonition and how supportive you were. I realised you must have gone through Hell watching me accept Donny s proposal after that, and now I know who that man in the vision really was.
NILES: I wanted to tell you at that moment, you know, but Frasier said it wouldn't make me a good friend, so in the end I believed him, as usual. He was always putting me off telling you. (He stops because he realises he might start rambling.) I'm sorry, this is your story. Carry on. (She acts as though he hasn't said anything because she's so engrossed with remembering it.)
DAPHNE: I barely heard what you were saying when I knew, but I must have understood. I don't even remember it now, all do I remember is thinking 'How do I stop him finding out?', so I blurted out that thing about the jewellery. Then back inside, your brother began his round of carols and I saw you with your arm around Mel. And all I could think about was how much I wanted it to be around me. I guess it just progressed from there, and now here we are.
NILES: Yes, here we are. Oh, Daphne, I never pictured this ever happening. I always kidded myself it would, but not once did I ever imagine that we'd be here together. Not under these circumstances.
DAPHNE: I certainly never saw this coming.
NILES: (He realises she s still in her wedding dress. Much as he likes this, it is rather big and keeps getting in the way of his driving.) I'd just like to say that your dress is lovely, you look absolutely stunning, but you've been travelling in it and I wouldn't want you to ruin it on my account. I think one of your suitcases is in the back if you want to change.
DAPHNE: Oh. I'd forgotten I was still wearing it! Yes, I think I will change. I could do with a rest anyway, stretch my legs, and so could you.
NILES: I'll pull over. (The Winnebago pulls up rather dodgily at the side of the road and grinds to a juddery halt. Niles gets out first, and is just about to help Daphne down as well when he sees a car driving up the road. He recognises it and goes pale.) Change of plan. Back inside and don't move! (He clambers back inside again and the two of them hide, although she isn t precisely sure why. He answers her unspoken question.) I just saw Dad and Frasier drive past. They must be looking for me.
DAPHNE: Did they spot you?
NILES: I don t think so. We can only hope. I think we should stay low for a few minutes. (She nods in agreement. Cut to:
Inside Frasier s car. He and Martin look tired and fed up.)
FRASIER: Dad, that was the sixth Winnebago we passed. It's holiday season and there s bound to be plenty more where that came from! You'll never find it like this. We can only assume that Niles has taken it. You know how he was feeling, he's depressed. He must have just gone somewhere to clear his brain of all that fuzz.
MARTIN: He's not right in the head! He'll do damage!
FRASIER: He'll be fine.
MARTIN: I meant to the Winnebago!
FRASIER: You care more about a great lumbering truck than you do about your own son?
MARTIN: Only when the two of them are combined.
FRASIER: Well, I'm turning back. This is completely futile and I think we should really go back to the hotel and help Donny look for Daphne. (Instant example of dramatic irony!)
MARTIN: (Conceding defeat.) Well, all right. But that thing better be in one piece when he brings it back! (Frasier starts to turn the car. A few seconds later we see it travel past the still-parked Winnebago. Niles is peering cautiously out of the window, signalling for Daphne to stay down with one hand. When he s sure the car's gone, he lets out a deep breath and takes her by the hand outside.)
DAPHNE: That was a close one.
NILES: It certainly was. We must be more careful.
DAPHNE: You'll get no argument from me. (It seems, without the confines of the Winnebago, they become more awkward and he finds it more and more difficult to talk to her normally. Aww.)
NILES: You'd better change.
DAPHNE: Oh yes. (She s about to re-enter the Winnebago, but Niles stops her.)
NILES: Wait just one second. Let me look at you. I want to remember you like this, you look simply beautiful. (She turns slowly, if a little hesitantly, while he looks her over, remembering every detail before sighing obviously.) Okay, go on before I embarrass myself any further. (She smiles and finally climbs aboard. For once in all of the years he's known her, he doesn't even try to sneak a peek. She emerges, eventually, as Niles is trying to get his bearings with a map - an upside-down map, obviously! She's wearing a pair of pedal pushers and a tee shirt, with her hair let out. She coughs to get his attention and then presents herself.)
DAPHNE: I'm afraid I don t look quite so beautiful any more.
NILES: You always look lovely, Daphne. (He takes her hands and helps her completely unnecessarily from the Winnebago, pulling her into the hug they never finished earlier. It is jittery but comforting.)
DAPHNE: This is going to be another one of those moments you never want to end.
NILES: (On a different plain of reality, he doesn't really hear what he s saying to her. It's more like genuine thinking aloud and I don't think he actually wants her to hear it, but it comes out anyway.) I would willingly stand here and starve to death as long as I had your arms around me. (Just as she s beginning to enter the same state of [un]consciousness, his cell phone rings and he goes to answer it. She tries to stop him.)
DAPHNE: Let it ring.
NILES: It might be one of my clients. (He answers it as they break apart, but holds onto her hand all the while. His somewhat delirious smile turns into a look of sheer horror as he finds out who it is.) Hello, Niles Crane... Frasier! (Daphne's mouth drops open.) Where am I? I'm going for a drive to clear my head.
FRASIER: (He is still driving.) In Dad's Winnebago?!
NILES: Well I was in it at the time. You know, when in Rome...
FRASIER: I've been trying to tell Dad that's where you are. He's been worried sick.
NILES: About me?
FRASIER: I'm talking about Dad, Niles. What do you think? (He says something inaudible, possibly indignant.) Well at least you're both okay.
NILES: Both? (A deathly silence. He can't possibly know... can he? Then he realises.) Oh, right.
FRASIER: Are you feeling any better?
NILES: I've been thinking it through and I'm feeling a lot less suicidal than I was a few hours ago. (He decides he might be sounding a little too chipper.) I'm fine, really.
FRASIER: I can understand why you wouldn't want to see the wedding. Talking of which, I don't suppose you saw the bride anywhere before you left, by any chance?
NILES: Daphne? (She starts to panic, so he puts an arm around her shoulders and holds her close.) No, I haven t seen her since last night, why? (Frasier explains.) Missing? (An acknowledgement and a murmur.) Well, I'm sure it s just pre-wedding nerves, uh, don't panic. You know we both went through a lot last night.
FRASIER: I guess. But Donny doesn't know that. (Contemptuously:) Simon thinks she's run off with you.
NILES: That's ridiculous. Didn't Simon also think that she was carrying my baby? (Frasier says something like 'That's what I said.') She's just scared. To be honest, I'd rather not get involved any more than I already have, and I can't really do much out here.
FRASIER: I guess you're right. Where are you anyway?
NILES: Somewhere East, I think, about 80 miles away.
FRASIER: Where are you headed, will you come back here?
NILES: Well, seeing as all of my stuff is here, I may as well check into a hotel if I find one. I might go home eventually when all of this is cleared up.
FRASIER: All right, I guess I'll see you when I see you. Don't stay out there too long, okay, Niles?
NILES: I won't. See you Frasier. (He turns off the phone and checks on Daphne.) Are you all right?
DAPHNE: Does he know?
NILES: No, I think I threw him off, but he sounded very suspicious.
DAPHNE: Oh, this is horrible, just horrible! What are we going to do?
NILES: I'm going to change, and we are going to keep driving. I want you to sit down and take deep breaths until I get back. (She's starting to calm down.)
DAPHNE: All right, but only because I know we'll come up with something. I trust you on that.
NILES: Stay here. I'll be right back. (He finds her a nearby rock to sit on. It's dusty.) Oh, here. (He removes his jacket and starts to lay it on the rock for her.)
DAPHNE: But that's your best jacket. You don't need to -
NILES: It'll clean. Sit. (Before she can protest, he places the jacket on the rock and gently shoves her into a sitting position. He quickly leaps into the Winnebago. Daphne sits on her rock looking around, taking deep breaths as advised and looking thoughtful. She hears footsteps, and then Niles reappears in whatever constitutes Niles-casual. [Just to prove I haven't been watching THAT closely.] He stands in the doorway.) Let's go. (She gets up, picks up the jacket and brushes it off, then joins him at the front of the vehicle. He starts the engine and drives off in the direction they were originally headed.) We have to decide what we're going to do. We can't drive around for the rest of our lives.
DAPHNE: I know that. I just wish we could. Why don't we do what you told your brother - book ourselves into a hotel?
NILES: Forever?
DAPHNE: Well we can't go back to the wedding! And we can't go back to your place. Sooner or later somebody'll figure out where I am and that'll be the first place they'll look. I feel like a criminal on the run.
NILES: Daphne, are you ashamed of me?
DAPHNE: No, of course not, why?
NILES: Because if you are, just say so. It seems as though you don't want anyone to know about us.
DAPHNE: I do, I really do. I want to shout it for the world to hear! And I would do, it's just.. well… I've just walked out on my own wedding. I'm so confused… (He sits there patiently, allowing her to explain why.) Ever since last night, when we were dancing, despite telling myself it was just nerves, I found I couldn't believe that any more. When we ended up having that little discussion in the hotel room, I didn't know what to think, and on the balcony I knew I really was in love with you, but, like I said, I'd made a promise which I couldn't break. That was more important.
NILES: I know. I understand that. I'd accepted that by the morning because I didn't want you to think that you'd left me misunderstanding you. When you found me in here earlier I was simply remembering all of the times I could have told you and didn't, and how I was going to tell you that we could never see each other again, that it was pointless. I was torturing myself, actually, and then, out of the blue, I was thinking of Mel, of our life together. It didn't last long. Every time I tried, all I could see and hear was you.
DAPHNE: The same thing happened to me this morning. I woke up and got ready - I was completely prepared to get married in a few hours. But then, suddenly, I had that stupid premonition again, but this time I could see the face of the mystery man and it WAS you, and you still had that bloody dragon. You flew across on it and scooped me up and took me away. It was so vivid this time, more so than before. I had an hour and a half to go before the ceremony, I had to do something, and then I saw you in here from my window. I knew I couldn't be seen by anyone before the wedding so I had to sneak out, and when I saw your brother and Mr. Crane with you it was perfect because I could tell all three of you my decision. I was going to ask you to give me away, and even now I don't know why I came up with the idea, I think I just wanted you to be there, no matter how briefly. By the time I'd snuck down, though, I'd completely changed my mind. I didn't want you to give me away, I didn't want anyone to give me away, all I wanted to do was to get as far from that place as possible.
NILES: I'm overwhelmed. Me?
DAPHNE: Yes. I figured it was better than nothing after all.
NILES: It would have been, I suppose, but were you intending to run away with me?
DAPHNE: I'm not sure. I think so. (A pause.) Oh dear, why didn't I think ahead, I'm always rushing into things without planning them. It's all going wrong. I'm so sorry about all of this. We're both going to lose everything because of me. (She curses herself, starting to cry.) I'm so stupid.
NILES: (He hands her a handkerchief, which she takes gratefully.) You're not. You're witty and intelligent and I don't want to hear you reprimand yourself like that.
DAPHNE: You always know what to say.
NILES: It's my job. (He pauses, considering something.) You know, it occurs to me that you haven't mentioned Donny's name all day.
DAPHNE: I haven't?
NILES: No. I think you're trying to block him out somehow, and you shouldn't. I know it's hard to accept but technically you're still engaged to him. If I can accept that, you have to as well.
DAPHNE: I suppose so… What am I going to do.
NILES: I'm thinking. (They both look thoughtful.) You know, I really did mean it last night when I said I'd leave Mel if you'd come with me. Well, obviously I did or we wouldn't be here.
DAPHNE: I don't understand how one minute you're married to her and the next you can leave her high and dry. Did you love her at all?
NILES: I suppose I did. She's so much like Maris I'm beginning to wonder why I would marry someone like that again. In fact, while I was married to Maris, all those years ago, I fell in love with you.
DAPHNE: Seven years ago. I didn't realise it was so long.
NILES: Yes, seven long, painful years ago. And then I met someone, I told myself and everyone else that I was over you in the hope of making the relationship work. It did work and I got married in possibly the first spontaneous thing I've ever done in my life. And then you made me do the second one. (He's not making much sense and tries to clarify it for himself, if not for her.) The truth of the matter is Daphne, that I love you - I always have and I always will. And there's nothing that Dad, Frasier, Donny, Mel, or any legal document can do to change that.
DAPHNE: (She knows how he feels, but even so she reels from it every time he tells her.) You're a wonderful person, Niles. You're sweet and charming and any woman would be lucky to have you.
NILES: Not just any woman. You're the only one I've ever needed.
DAPHNE: In that case I'm lucky. (There is a short pause while they collect their thoughts. Niles speaks up again.)
NILES: Are you happy, I mean, right now?
DAPHNE: You have no idea. If only this were straightforward. (Niles' phone rings again. He answers it.)
NILES: Hello… oh, hello Frasier… yes, still going East. Any news? (Cut to Frasier, now back at the hotel, away from the guests.)
FRASIER: Donny's postponed the wedding. We can't find her anywhere and her mother's sent out a search party. And considering that it comprises Daphne's hung-over, re-inebriated brothers, it might take some time.
NILES: Isn't a search party a little extreme? (Daphne pales at the thought.) She can't be far. Have you tried all of the hotel rooms, people's cars? You know, that place has extremely large grounds -
FRASIER: Save it, Niles, I know she's with you.
NILES: Are you accusing me of kidnapping. (He mouths "He knows." to Daphne - she panics.)
FRASIER: Yes.
NILES: Frasier, she's not here. I would never -
FRASIER: Stop pretending. I know she's there and if she's not back in 24 hours I'm telling Donny everything. And I mean, everything.
NILES: What can I do to convince you that I'm alone?
FRASIER: (Very slightly beginning to believe him) Admittedly, I can't prove it, but where else could she be, where could she go? She's left all of her stuff except for one case in the Winnebago. No-one's spoken to her since the party and you were the last person she was seen with. You tell me I'm wrong.
NILES: Okay, you're wrong.
FRASIER: Just bring her back.
NILES: I will do no such thing because Daphne is not here.
FRASIER: Whatever you say… (He puts the phone down. Just as he does this, Donny approaches him.)
DONNY: Any luck?
FRASIER: No sign of Niles either.
DONNY: I'm so worried about Daphne. Why would she do this?
FRASIER: She's scared. It's a big step for her. Look at it this way - there's not far she can get.
DONNY: I guess so. I'll go and help with the search party.
FRASIER: I'd better go and tell Mel that her husband is also missing. (Donny walks off to a crowd of people in the distance. Frasier watches him leave and then checks his watch, and then goes off to find Mel, thinking of a good lie. I think this scene is ominous enough for me to end there and leave you in some sort of suspense. Ha ha!)
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