Employee Form


                          MONTHLY OVERALL EVALUATION

Name: _________________________________________     Date: ____________________

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KNOWLEDGE:    _____THE SON OF A BITCH REALLY KNOWS HIS SHIT.
              _____KNOWS JUST ENOUGH TO BE DANGEROUS.
              _____ONLY HALF A BRAIN AND IS DANGEROUS.
              _____FUCKING BRAIN DAMAGED.  HIS COFFEE CUP HAS A HIGHER I.Q.
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ACCURACY:     _____DOES EXCELLENT WORK IF NOT PREOCCUPIED WITH PUSSY.
              _____PRETTY GOOD.  ONLY OCCASIONALLY BLOWS IT OUT HIS ASS.
              _____HAS TO TAKE OFF HIS SHOES TO COUNT HIGHER THAN TEN.
              _____COULDN'T COUNT HIS BALLS AND GET THE SAME NUMBER TWICE.
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ATTITUDE:     _____EXTREMELY COOPERATIVE-  IF YOU KISS HIS ASS FREQUENTLY.
              _____BROWN NOSER IN GOOD STANDING.
              _____OFTEN PISSES OFF CO-WORKERS.  THINKS HE OWNS THE PLACE.
              _____DOESN'T GIVE A SHIT, NEVER DID, NEVER WILL.
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RELIABILITY:  _____REALLY A DEPENDABLE LITTLE COCKSUCKER.
              _____WORKS SO HARD THAT HE MUST TAKE AN EXTRA DAY OFF EACH WEEK.
              _____CAN RELY ON HIM TO BE THE FIRST ONE OUT THE DOOR.
              _____TOTALLY FUCKING WORTHLESS.
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APPEARANCE:   _____EXTREMELY NEAT.  EVEN COMBS HIS PUBIC HAIR.
              _____LOOKS GREAT ON HIS DAYS OFF.
              _____FLIES LEAVE FRESH DOG SHIT TO GO FOLLOW HIM.
              _____DIRTY, FILTHY, SMELLY SON OF A BITCH.
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PERFORMANCE:  _____GOES LIKE A SON OF A BITCH IF THERE IS MONEY IN IT FOR HIM.
              _____DOES ALL KINDS OF GOOD SHIT AT EVALUATION TIME.
              _____WORKS WELL AFTER AN ENEMA.
              _____COULDN'T DO LESS IF HE WERE IN A COMA.
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LEADERSHIP:   _____CARRIES A CHAINSAW AND GETS GOOD RESULTS.
              _____MACHO ATTITUDE.  COMMANDS TOTAL DISGUST.
              _____DOG FASTED THREE DAYS LAST TIME HE BROUGHT HOME PORK CHOPS.
              _____MOTHER TERESA TOLD HIM TO GET FUCKED.
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I UNDERSTAND THAT I HAVE BEEN COUNSELED AND UNDERSTAND MY RIGHTS UNDER THE
PRIVACY ACT OF 1974.  I FURTHER ACKNOWLEDGE THAT I AM AS FUCKED UP AS A
FOOTBALL BAT AND I WILL MAKE SOME ATTEMPT TO CORRECT MY DEFICIENCIES.

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                                       Employee signature